Posted by sedona on February 5, 2005, at 1:47:04
Hi-I've had problems with depression for most of my life, and about 4 years ago I decided to try antidepressants. My first one was Wellbutrin and within 11 days I was obsessed with suicide and considering entering a hospital. It was the lowest I had ever been. I was shocked by having such a strong negative reaction to a drug that was supposed to make me feel better and shocked by how the doctors told me to keep taking it because it hadn't kicked in yet. To try to make a long story short over the years I have now tried 14 drugs including antidepressants, antipsychotics, anticonvulsants, stimulants, and antianxiety drugs. I still have major depressive episodes, I've gained 25 lbs. that wont come off, I still barely function at work and school, and I find that I have stronger thoughts of suicide as the years have gone by. The only positive experiences I have had with AD's is less anger(actually it's more like apathy) and less anxiety. The only drugs I have found helpful are Klonopin and Adderall, but they just keep my anxiety down and allow me to stay awake all day.I have a wonderful psychologist, but unfortunattely my psychiatrist only seems to want me to try more drugs. I am tired and sick of trying new medicines and dealing with all the side-effects. Sometimes I actually think I was better before all these chemicals. Anyone else have a similar experience? I actually think I would rather be dead than continue this seemingly endless cycle.
Thanks for reading.
poster:sedona
thread:453522
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20050202/msgs/453522.html