Posted by MoparFan91 on January 29, 2005, at 3:17:18
Hi, this is my first time posting here. I've been diagnosed Bipolar II about 8 years ago. My current age is 20. My symptomology of Bipolar II when untreated seems to predominantly consist of cycling between different degrees/forms of depression over a few days or even over the space of hours within a day. The only time that I seem to show classic signs of (hypo)mania is when I'm given antidepressants. I don't seem to get along with them well from experience even with mood stabilizing meds. Otherwise, unmedicated, I may only have occasional periods of higher energy and activity along with disrupted sleep schedules [this can also happen in depression] but not any other classical signs of hypomania; no mood elevation, no self-esteem, no spending sprees, no dangerous activities, no pressure of speech, etc.
The forms of depression I cycle through are as follows:
#1: apathetic-inhibited, lifeless, flat mood/emptiness, unmotivated, sometimes (but not always) lethargic, desire to sleep life away; It tends to feel like there's a "hole" in my emotions and that my feelings are 'turned OFF'.
#2: anxious-agitated, restless, hyper, anger towards self, very low mood; It's like a vacuum cleaner is sucking my 'mood' down. This form of depression has caused several hospitalizations in the past. I also tend to get suicidal thoughts and impulses the most in this form of depression (though it can sometimes happen in #1 at times), and I have damaged my own possessions and self-injured/cut myself when experiencing this.
#3: sadness-tearfulness; I get this at times as well. Anything will make me almost cry.
Forms #1 and Form #2 tend to dominate, and I seem to have Form #3 occasionally as well but not as often. Form #1 tends to eventually trigger Form #2 due to the distress and loss in enjoyment it causes.
In addition to the diagnosis, I also show symptoms of OCD, social anxiety, possible borderline personality disorder, and childhood history suggesting slight possibility of mild autistic tendencies. The negative aspects of these co-morbid conditons often tends to trigger depression Form #2.
I have taken some different medications over the years with only minimal success. I have taken the following:
Depakote - 1000-1500mg, seemed to only help with anger/impulses but later seemed to build a resistance to it.
Paxil - 20mg, can't remember how this helped, but I think it helped me to socialize a little more easily. Don't know if it helped depresson or not.
Lexapro - helped "a little" with being pro-social but didn't help with depression that great. Eventually triggered mania at 20mg especially when combined with Geodon.
Topamax - At 200mg, friends noticed I was more calm.
Geodon - 40-80mg nightly, originally used to get rid of suicidal thoughts. It seemed to make the antidepressants stronger. Helped with depression in terms of making me more urgent about situations when taken alone. Made me paranoid at times.
Zoloft - 100mg, Same as Lexapro except with a somewhat more agitation/anger.
Zyprexa - 15mg, feeling of hostility/extreme agitation few hours after dosing, slept 16 hours/day, came close to having heat stroke.
Abilify - 10mg, sleep was impossible, restless anxiety/agitation, feelings of going into an anxiety attack. No relief of depression
Wellbutrin - 300mg, made me more vigilant but compounded anxiety/agitation. No help in depression.
I started to see a new doctor who takes an integrative approach in psychiatry. Last Friday, I started Lamictal at 25mg. He said that Lamictal needed to be built up slowly to avoid certain side effects, but I can't remember which ones they were. He also started me on some nutritional supplements as well. He said something about Lamictal having some antidepressant properties or something (though I'm not sure). I have been on it for about week so far. My doctor is going to have me increase the dosage up to 50mg after 2nd week and so on.So, I have a few questions:
Do you know what I should expect from Lamictal as far as relieving my symptoms?
Will it have any benefit in helping with OCD, Borderline Personality Disorder, social anxiety, etc.?
Are there any side effects that I should look out for when I hit the higher dosages? I don't seem to have any at all on my current dosage.
How long does it usually take to start seeing improvements? At 25mg for a week so far, my family already notices 'a little' difference positively in me.
poster:MoparFan91
thread:449653
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20050128/msgs/449653.html