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Re: To Medicate or Not? Pros and Cons » momof1bpkid

Posted by yznhymer on October 27, 2004, at 22:23:05

In reply to To Medicate or Not? Pros and Cons, posted by momof1bpkid on October 26, 2004, at 11:46:35

> Hi,
>
> I guess I am starting to feel some frustration. My child age 13 has been on a variety of medications since the age of 10. Not too much seems to help at all. He still experiences problems in school on a daily basis, And has suffered many unwanted side effects from his medications. He has tried just about everything and is on about everything.
> Currently he is on many medications and I am starting to wonder, Is it even helping ? I have myself been starting to think, should I continue to medicate this child, when it seems that there is very limited benefits from these medications and who knows what it is doing to his physical body. Some times I even question if they are making him worse? But he has improved over the last 3 years in quite a few areas, but that might just be normal growing up, It also seems he has more problems in school than ever, and again he is at that age where a portion of this might be normal, although his behavior in school is not normal and worse than before, It may also be age and puberty in why we see it more?
> I am not entirely sure it is the medication rather than the constant therapy and people working with him on a daily basis. But at times I also think, his issues caused him the need to be medicated in the first place and maybe it is necessary. Its so hard to tell at now. But my only concern is he is 13 going through puberty and My concern is why keep him on something that may not be benefitting him at all. His point of view.. he feels they "he doesnt feel different", and this is pretty much everytime he tries a new med. or maintains the meds he is on. I can and will say tho his first week of concerta was wonderful, but that wore off quick. Maybe these meds just poop out on him quick? I know there is alot of debate as well on medications and children, and the possibility it might not be helping or doing anything at all that it might do for an adult.
>
> any thoughts on this? Please share your experiences.
>
> Thanks
>
>

Hi there...

First of all, I just wanted to send you some positive energy and tell you I feel for you facing this difficult dilemma. And I want to commend you for seeking medical as well as educational help and other resources for your child.

My oldest son has had many health and mental issues since his premature birth 22 years ago. His OCD and depression during his Middle school and HS years were particularly trying... and he did have one awful Junior year in college. Nevertheless, he's done well enough (he just graduated from a good college, made friends, etc.)and I have hopes that his future will be a good one.

I can share a few observations about my experiences:

1. Things got somewhat better as he got older. Ages 11 through 14 were the worst. From that point on he got more and more stable.

2. I utilized every resource. Some things work better than others, and some work better in concert with others.

3. Giving meds to children is always scary. Don't be afraid of meds but be scrupulous about researching them and monitoring your child. Zoloft and Buspar were key in helping my son... his obsessive thoughts were very upsetting and debilitating before the meds. I worried that he might become suicidal.

4. Having someone to talk to about my son's problems and the decisions we had to make made a big difference to me. Not only did I feel better, but the process helped me analyze and resolve problems more effectively.

That said, I have to admit being very uncomfortable for a long time about my son's continued reliance on these drugs. He gained a lot of weight in a short period of time that he hasn't been able to lose. He has social anxiety though he's made a lot of strides over the years through therapy, in particular. Neverthless, he's never dated. I can't help but wonder if he has no libido from the SSRI... might not even know what he's missing since he started the meds so early in life.

He recently tried a go at dropping the meds, and I was hopeful that he'd do OK without them. But due to the stress of looking for a job after college, but particularly due to his mother's vicious attacks (yeah, I'm a bit angry about that) on his lack of progress in finding something, his anxiety ratcheted up in direct proportion to the plummet in his self esteem. So he went back to his pdoc and restarted the meds. I'm holding out hope that once he moves away from Mom he'll be able to try again, perhaps with a little more support from a therapist.

I don't know if this is helpful or not. Seems to me you have good instincts and are asking the right questions. I'd say, trust your gut. Perhaps you can have your child go on a trial without some of the meds and see what happens... maybe have a little extra support available to ensure success. The meds will still be there if you need them.

I'd express all my concerns to his prescribing doctor and discuss the issue thoroughly. The bottom line is we can only do our best... this is not a situation where you can predict results with great precision.. And you can always modify course as you see what happens.

Good luck to you,
Mark


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