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Re: Nicky847

Posted by bluesfan on December 30, 2003, at 13:59:26

In reply to Re: Nicky847, posted by nicky847 on December 30, 2003, at 13:41:41

Thanks again for your words of encouragement. Today has definitely been the worst day for me.....can't seem to get things out of my mind. I wish I could think more of hurting myself than others at this point.....if that makes any sense. I'm afraid to be around my wife right now because I'm afraid I will hurt her......even though I would NEVER want to. I would have an easier time thinking of myself being dead than her......maybe that is why I'm thinking of her the most. I called to get an appointment with a therapist today, but the earliest I can get an appointment is January 26th......so talking to you on here is pretty much all I've got. I'm doing okay at work today......but my thoughts are now taking over, soon to lead to an anxiety attack I'm sure. I just want very badly for this to be over!

> Bluesfan-
> I also meant to ask you are you currently seeing a therapist? I think talk therapy could really help you through this rough time you are having...people like you who are honest about what they are experiencing can really benefit from seeing a therapist..I think it is very brave of you to be up front about the thoughts you are having...the first time I went thru this I was too scared to tell anyone about the thoughts I was having..then I read in a book "From Panic to Power" by Lucinda Bassett that these thoughts were a common symptom of anxiety disorder and that they did NOT mean that you were homicidal or suicidal...those words were a godsend for me..
>
> > Hi bluesfan...
> >
> > If I asked you not to think of a pink buffalo in a ballerina suit..and i would give you a million dollars to NOT think about a pink buffalo in a ballerina suit..you wouldnt be able to not think of it..thats what you are going through now with these thoughts..you are trying so hard not to think these thoughts that it is impossible NOT to think them..does that make sense?
> >
> > Heres the thing with the thoughts..and how you will know you have won your battle with them...
> >
> > you have won not when you stop having them..but when you stop being afraid of them ...when you know you are really really getting better..you may still have these thoughts from time to time...but you KNOW that all it is, is a thought, and that it will not hurt you..and that YOU will not hurt you..the thoughts are like a gory picture hanging on a wall in a museum and nothing more..you look at it..know it is only a picture..and move past it to the next picture..
> >
> >
> > then when you are able to disqualify these thoughts as the mental waste products of an overload of adrenaline, cortisol, and whatever nasty chemicals your body is currently producing, you will find you have them less and less often, until you stop having them all together..this process takes about 3 to 4 months..although right now at your stage in your med therapy you are at the absolute worst point..after this week and maybe the next 1 or 2 weeks you should notice an improvement...crazy as it sounds you GET USED TO IT..and when you do it goes away..
> >
> > an important thing to do is continue to live your life..dont try and do things in a feverish manner to take your mind off things..but do things you enjoy a little at a time..these thoughts cause discomfort and nothing more...you CAN function with them!
> >
> >
> >
> > > I just wanted to know about how long it took for your thoughts of death to get better? I realize you may still be going through this currently on your Lexapro, but I thought maybe you had an idea of how long it took for you to get better on the Celexa. This week has been as bad as before I was on the medicine, and I'm definitely looking for some encouragement. The Lexapro has really thrown me for a loop this week, and all I want to do is stay in bed!
> >
> >
>
>


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Psycho-Babble Medication | Framed

poster:bluesfan thread:294675
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20031225/msgs/294709.html