Posted by Peter on September 26, 2003, at 6:51:42
In reply to re: Day 19 » Peter , posted by lil' jimi on September 25, 2003, at 12:19:16
Ok. Today is day 21.
Now, I don't want to jinx myself by saying this, but I think I'm beginning to feel the therapeutic effects; I feel like a cloud has been lifted (except I still wake up feeling foggy and hungover), many of my SE's have abated, I'm more energetic, etc.
Because I've been so depressed the last few weeks, I've been pretty socially avoidant and I've been isolating a lot. This is a rut that I get into often when I'm very symptomatic. And even though I think I might be beginning to feel better, I still get those feelings of anticipatory anxiety when faced with going out or meeting people. So the hard part now is pushing myself a bit to get out of my isolation so that I could see if the lex is helping my social anxiety. It's very tough for me to do. But, I guess I'll just take things one step at a time; the fact that my depression alone seems to be lifting is enough to celebrate about! I just hope I don't fall right back into depression again; this happened to me at the beginning of week 2 - I thought I was beginning to feel better, but it didn't stick - I ended up feeling awful again by the end of the same day. That's why I'm always afraid to admit to myself and others that I think I'm feeling better, because it might just be another 'deceiving improvement.' But enough of that. I've gotta stay positive, solidify in my mind that the damn med is beginning to work instead of second-guessing, and begin to look forward to the lex continuing to help with other areas of my illness, like social anxiety, etc. Let's hope this is really the beginning of getting better!
thanks,
Peter
poster:Peter
thread:109458
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20030923/msgs/263417.html