Posted by Gameiplay on March 28, 2003, at 13:08:13
In reply to Adderol, posted by sharon miller on February 24, 2000, at 13:23:52
I am SO SICK of some people judging parents who decide to use medications to HELP their SUFFERING CHILDREN!!! That's right, I said ADD/ADHD children SUFFER. They live lonely, isolated lives full of disappointment, rejection, being diciplined repeatedly. The family suffers too, the stares, the isolation, the GUILT. Every decision a parent makes for their child seems to bring about MORE GUILT. Guilt if you do something, guilt if you don't. Everywhere you turn, there is another self-appointed "EXPERT" to tell you "exactly what you are doing wrong."
You have no idea what it is like to be the parent of a child with ADD/ADHD. What makes you such an expert? I wonder how you would feel if my un-medicated son lashed out at your "perfect little dear" in the grocery store? What if he hit your husband in the crotch while walking through Blockbuster Video? What if he shoved your child on the soccer field because he was to "wired up" to pay attention to the game?
How is he supposed to learn (even in homeschool) when he hops out of his seat every 3 seconds...no exaggeration???
My son has ADHD symptoms and has just about destroyed our lives. I am an RN (recently retired at the ripe old age of 29 to homeschool my son) and my husband is a structural engineer. We have been through treatment groups (years), seen Psychiatrists, Psychologists, Pediatricians. The stress on the family is overwhelming sometimes.
We rejected medication years ago (my son is 6 1/2 now) because of PRESSURE AND GUILT, GUILT, GUILT from our fellow Conservatives for even THINKING about "Putting our child in the straight-jacket of a psychiatric diagnosis." I gave up membership to the "no meds at any cost" club when my son had suffered enough.
If he had diabetes, would you have the same negative opinion of me for giving him insulin? I mean, come on, insulin DOES have potentially fatal side-effects, (seizures, coma).
We heard,"If you just spanked him more."
We heard,"You should not spank your child, that's what caused his behavior."
We've been kicked out of daycares, YMCA daycares, gotten stares, snide comments from other "expert" parents about our FAILURE to control our child. Did I mention, gossiped about at church?
If you don't have a child like this, it is IMPOSSIBLE for you to judge a parent who would do anything to help her child succeed (INCLUDING MEDICATION).
We get enough guilt and blame, we don't need your Values imposed on us.
Go away SNOTTY, JUDGEMENTAL, KNOW-IT-ALL!! PARENTS OF ADD/ADHD KIDS ARE GOOD PARENTS...EVEN IF THEY DECIDE TO MEDICATE. DEAL WITH IT!