Posted by LAURA777 on February 4, 2003, at 19:31:48
In reply to Listening to Cocaine, posted by fachad on February 4, 2003, at 8:10:11
> Laura777 wrote: "as far as stimulants go the only experience I ever had with them was cocaine and i absolutely HATED it , sorry for the strong words but the depression that caused was off the charts ..."
>
> Yes, I had a similar experience with cocaine. I only tried it three times, but each time it was horrific. I felt great for about 20 minutes, and then I was in hell for hours.First let me begin by telling you all how interesting you all are ,, i have a problem finding interesting people ..people to me are mostly surface where i think more deeply and do not care for the surface stuff much it bores me , but then again i think having this malady has maybe caused me to be this way ???!!!! who knows , but that is niether here nor there because the damage is done .. i like profound things and i like to think , i find that most people do not , or at least the ones i run into , which is not many since i tend to isolate , and this i do because i can't relate to what is so exciting about this life ...i spend alot of time in my head.. can anyone else get this ??? let me know !!!
Bob your story is very amusing , you write very well as do all of you .. i love the metaphor about the cage it is outstanding... truly ..
Fachad that is exactly how i felt about cocaine 20 minutes of so called pleasure was not worth the greuling hours of off the charts blackness ,, tell me something.... do cold medications that contain psudoephedrine effect you in the same way but on a smaller scale ???
i can not take cold meds with that ingrediant ,, i feel like i am coming off cocaine but on a smaller scale but enough to not go near them no matter how bad a cold i have .. i wonder ????today the doctor, my primary, put me on modafinil provigil .. my psychologist called my primary and explained my situation to her , he has seen me for over 3 years once a week and knows me pretty well , he knows this is a biological thing .. there is depression and bipolor in my family and she knows this as well .. any way i went to see her and further explained myself and she is willing to try this drug with the ssri .. but she BELIEVES me NOT to be depressed !! She said that she thinks i am "discontented" get that one .. would you say that people that are depressed are discontented ???
Ya know my husband suffers from this and is totally unaware of it , he just thinks that this is what life is !!! And i love when people tell me that " It could be worse " what the hell is that ??? hey man "IT could be better " this i know .. or they say " you should be grateful you have a house everyone is healthy " so because i am not dying of cancer nor are my kids but i am miserable as hell inside i should just live with it ??? " yea right what hay wagon did you fall off of "???? or how about the people who say you do not pray or go to church enough ??? or you just need to get out there and do something !!! love that one !!!! i say one word to all these things CLUELESS!!!!!! These people have to be clueless .. And this last one being very shaming but so very untrue " if you are bored you are boring " i just don't know i can not relate to alot of people .. do any of you suffer this ??? do you spend alot of time thinking cause theres nothing else to do ?? i do read alot or used to but i tell you it has NOT helped my spelling at all , i thought it was supposed to ... it just goes to show you misconceptions abound ..
Any way ..SSris calmed me down made me less impulsive and hyper .. but before i started taking them i would never watch tv , just a select few shows mostly off the main networks as well .. i would read books all kinds of books , but ones that in my opinion were well written , both fiction non fiction as well , anyway a half a year of doing ssris i found myself watching mindless sitcoms , The only picture i can give you is someone with a lobotomy drooling in front of the television set ... "Time to take your meds cheswick !!!"
talk to you all soon and if any of you have tired provigil to augment an ssri please let me know .. and how was it ?? thanks , laura
poster:LAURA777
thread:138954
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20030204/msgs/139417.html