Posted by marji on November 11, 2002, at 21:54:00
I am 34 and was diagnosed with Cyclothimia about a month ago. This diagnoses is in addition to the others which include, Borderline Personality Disorder, Dependability Personality Disorder, Angexity Attacks, Chostrocondritis(Inflamation of the chest wall from the stress), and ocasional Panic Attacks.
I started taking celexa a year ago. My doctor noticed a change in me and had me take the depresion screening test. At that time started on 20mg and then gradually increased to 60 mg. During this time I had a car accident in which I nearly hit a train. I had caused injury to my back. I was working part time hours due to the injury. Then in March all hell broke lose. I was at work and was called in to the office. They accused me of calling my supervisor the anti christ and a royal bitch. I did not even know what the anti christ was. I told them this and denighed doing or saying this. They said they had witnesses that were willing to put it in writting that I said this. I said I may have called her a bitch but there is no way I would have called her the anti christ. When I went back to work I punched out for lunch and called my friend and said I cant take any more they are all against me. I want to end it all. I wanted to commit suicide. That I knew this was wrong but this is how I was filling. She had me promise her that I would go to HR for help. I did and was admitted to the hospital. As it turns out to some of my friends when talking about my supervisor I had refered to her as the Anti Christ with them also. It was then that I was diagnosed with BPD and the other disorders. I was reduced to 40 mg of celexa and started on 150 mg of Welabutrin. I started to attend day treatment and started individual therapy. During the next 8 months I was hospitalized 9 times 2 of them I had overdosed on meds. The second time I was put in a low dose amnegia for a day from the overdose. In July was the last overdose and at that time I was put on 300 mg of Seroquel. From the end of june till the end of August I was placed in a group home to try to help from being hospitalized all of the time.
With the last hospitalization I was transfered to the state hospital. My psychiatrist wanted me to volonteer to be admitted to have my medication modified. To do so I would need to be taken off of all my curent medications and then be remedicated if needed once I was evaluated. I agreed to do this, though the idia of going to a state hospital was scarry I figured what do I have to loose. I did not want to die I just wanted the pain to stop.
During the stay at the state hospital it was discovered that I have Cychlothymia. I am now taking 300 mg of Neurontin in the AM and 600 mg in the PM. I have also been but on 100 mg of Seroquel to try and help with the voices I here telling me negative things. I am taking DBT classes for the Borderline Personality Disorder. Attending day treatment daily and counseling weekly. Hopefully I am on my way. I have not had thoughts of suicide or self harm for a month now. That is an acomplishment in itself.
I continue to try and find out as information I can on my disorders so that I am knowledgable about what is happening to me.
Hopefully the light at the end of the road is getting closer.
Thanks
Marji
poster:marji
thread:127303
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20021108/msgs/127303.html