Posted by BarbaraCat on August 11, 2002, at 14:33:18
In reply to Tenderness attack » BarbaraCat, posted by Iago Camboa on August 11, 2002, at 3:54:49
Good Morning Dear Iago,
Thank you so much for your helpful post, and as always, it's so nice to hear from you. I remember your saying many months ago how Xanax has helped you so much. I'm going to tell my pdoc that I now wish to try Xanax. About 4 years ago I was on it for a short time and liked it very much. There was a soothing quality to it. This is what I'm looking for in a benzo. Others don't have this soft quality, or if they do, it wears off so quickly. I've been on Klonopin and now lorezapam, and although they help to blunt edges, I'd like more. I'd like the feeling of inner peace, even though chemically induced. I've also started taking valerian root and passion flower extract, as well as getting back to a daily yoga practice. Although I don't presume that I'll ever be totally free of drugs, I'm trying to at least add nutritional and body/mind support. I haven't lost many pounds so far, but am building strength and muscle tone - and have so much more energy!I take your warning about AD's much to heart. I've been down that road before, thinking that I could do it without an AD and learned to my dismay that I could not. I'm titrating down very, very slowly from Remeron. With each reduction in dose, I have a few days of flashes of temper and impatience, but after a week or two it goes away and I feel more clear. Sure wish I could find the 'perfect' drug - don't we all? Your suggestion to skip a lithium every now and then is very interesting. Mainly, because I realize that I had inadvertently skipped my morning dose a few times and was beginning to wonder where all my glee and bustling project plans were coming from. There's such a fine line between the exhileration and scintillation of mild hypomania, and the disorganized frenzy where black depression inevitably follows as night follows day. Have you seen the movie "A Beautiful Mind"? It may not be in your country, but if it is, I wholeheartedly recommend it. It won the much deserved Academy Award for best picture here in the States. While my condition is nowhere near as devastating or brilliant as John Nash's, the movie so touchingly conveys someone who was determined to not let his illness or his medications deprive him of his spark of genius. For me the secret is this: as long as I can drag my body out of bed and get moving, I can free up energy that gets easily jammed up. From there, all else that is good for me is more evident and I have the energy and calmness to pursue it.
So you're in Portugal? I've never been there but it seems to be a beautiful and relatively unspoiled country, not as frenetic as some other European areas. The Basque Region seems very wonderful, from what I've read and heard. You're very lucky to be there, have a life and history there. I find it hard to imagine that you had ECT. It seems to be true, thought, that those who are the wisest and most compassionate beings are those who had great suffering in their lives. In order to be a shaman, it was required that the initiate was 'touched by madness' as well as possessing other more beneficial gifts. So, it helps me to think that we all who suffer from these horrible frightening conditions are really high priests and priestesses in training.
poster:BarbaraCat
thread:113976
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20020807/msgs/116073.html