Posted by susan C on September 4, 2001, at 18:09:35
In reply to About to get ECT...., posted by PhoenixGirl on September 4, 2001, at 17:29:45
dear P,
Oh, boy, here is a cyber hug...and an observation, only, perhaps because it is a connection for, to and from me, unfortunately not an answer, but anyway. You say 'since 12 years old' and in your list of things there is no mention of female hormone evaluation, endrochinologist, gynocologist...I am on that road, actually a five lane freeway I think at times.
Just a thought. Be sure and get second opinions, before doing ect, as well.
Susan C.
> This is kind of long, but please read, I need help. I'd like to see what others here think about what I'm about to do. I'm in my early 20s, and have had serious depression, social phobia, anxiety, and crippling fatigue since I was 12. I had symptoms of these conditions, as well as moderate OCD, since my earliest memories. See, my mom has manic depression, one of her sisters committed suicide, my dad's father was a severe alcoholic, and my fraternal twin has had most of the same problems I do, but to a somewhat lesser degree. Apparently, I have very bad mental health genes. My dad is very negative and critical also, and I was picked on in school. Recently I have had permanent damage done to my vision from Lasik surgery, which has pushed me further into depression. I have had almost no friends since the age of 12 because of my problems and moving a lot, and have been on antidepressant drugs since age 13. I've tried imipramine, zoloft, anafranil, effexor, serzone, trazadone, wellbutrin, celexa, remeron, and now desipramine, with only partial relief. I've tried adding thyroid hormone, stimulants, and some combinations thereof. I've done tons of therapy. Despite all of this, I still feel miserably depressed, I fantasize about death, and I have no friends or intimacy with anyone. I feel like an elderly woman, and I'm 23 years old. I've had depression for so long and it started so early, I don't even know who I am without depression. My social phobia, and the early and chronic isolation have made it difficult for me to have even the simplest social interactions. My doctor wants me to have ECT, which I am agreeing to. I guess what I'm afraid of is that it won't work well, the memory problems will be too much, and/or the positive effect won't last. If it doesn't last, I'll have to do maintenance, but I fear what that might do to my memory. Also, ECT is very expensive, but my health insurance covers 90% of it. What if I need maintenance ECT indefinitely? I may not always have good if any health insurance. The insurance I have now is very good, but I hate my job and want to leave it. Our health care system in this country really blows, hardworking people can't necessarily get what they need. Anyway, please share your thoughts, advice, insights, or anything you might like to say to me.
poster:susan C
thread:77709
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20010902/msgs/77716.html