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Re: GENERAL QUESTION - TO EVERYONE » sweetmarie

Posted by Lorraine on June 23, 2001, at 11:19:05

In reply to GENERAL QUESTION - TO EVERYONE, posted by sweetmarie on June 22, 2001, at 14:42:54

>3 things were equally as likely to happen: 1) I would get better, 2) I would remain as ill as I am now (for the rest of my life), and 3) I would get worse.

>I can`t stand the thought that there is no hope and that I may have to `adjust` my life according to my illness. I don`t mean that I want 100% happiness - I`d settle for continual mild depression.

Anna: I have been struggling with these thoughts myself lately. Like you, I have TRD, and have not found a combo that worked. I was listening to a radio show about cancer (similar disease, don't you think? LOL) Anyway, the doctor made the point that patients need to stop being so end result oriented, that we have to be willing to say "i want to get well, but this is acceptable. if my conditions gets worse, that will be acceptable." He is talking about acceptance of a medical condition. I don't know that I can do that. I find myself grieving a lot these days--grieving that I have lost forever the person I used to be. My body is damaged irretrievably. I will never be able to handle stress again. I will always have this weakness, this vulnerability. If we had lost an arm, there would be a grieving process we would go thru. Somehow, with this illness, I avoided the grieving process. I stumble along, trying this med and that. Yes, there are always new drugs to try. But somehow, in the process of going from one med to another, we never get to truly mourne our loss. Anyway, this is what I am struggling with now.


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poster:Lorraine thread:67494
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