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Re: panic

Posted by grapebubblegum on May 11, 2001, at 19:15:25

In reply to Re: panic , posted by Sunie on May 11, 2001, at 12:00:15

Actually, maybe we're on to something, Sunie.

For people who have never had a panic attack, it is VERY difficult to explain. It feels nothing like regular fear that is in response to a valid stimulus. It's not even exactly fear... the closest word is panic but there really is no word to describe it unless you have been through it. It's just a total change in self that is very upsetting. I'll try to explain, in my own experience, though it is difficult. As I said, it is not a suicidal feeling but rather a feeling of wishing to not be alive to feel the episode. It's like a disruption in normal thought, so that is why I wanted to explore the idea of whether it could be something that hasn't really been understood well yet.

In trying to explain it to a friend who has felt suicidally depressed but never experienced panic attacks, I said, "It's kind of like the worst lows of depression concentrated in pure form and compressed into a relatively short episode" (although it feels like it lasts forever at the time.)

That sounds kind of like what you described, Sunie. I also become unable to talk during these episodes. I hyperventilate and have a very hard time breathing normally. I pace and perform repetitive motions, (shaking my head, hitting my knee) and then wind up crouched on the floor hardly able to give verbal responses or follow orders from hospital personnel or whoever is around me. I told my doctor this and she said that is how people in bad panic attacks behave. Any other insight from anyone???


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