Posted by Mary Ann on March 10, 2001, at 0:23:04
In reply to I'm a Stalker, posted by gib on March 9, 2001, at 22:35:42
Gib,
I am no expert by any means, but your stalking seems to be more like an obsession-compulsive disorder, especially considering the fact that you don't like doing it. My OCD comes out in counting and chewing my food. I also have dysthymia (a form of early-childhood depression) and post-traumatic stress syndrome (from a near-fatal car accident) which in turn gives me panic attacks, especially when I hear tires squeal, and last, but not least, agoraphobic, where I preferred to stay in my house (I have an office in my home and run my own business and don't commute to a job.)I, too, was so sick of living with this that I considered ending it all, but knew that my friends and family would suffer greatly, and I also thought about what life would be like if I didn't really succeed at my suicide attempt, but became a paraplegic or a quadriplegic or even a vegetable. That would be absolutely unbearable for me, therefore I have turned my efforts into things and activities where I can make friends and acquaintances.
I began taking Prozac, which greatly helped my OCD, depression and panic attacks, but killed my sex life with my husband. My doctor switched me to Serzone, which replenished my sex life, but so far doesn't have nearly the great effects of the Prozac.
I have also become involved in a bowling league (something I never would have considered before I started on meds)and have made many new acquaintances, which may turn into lasting friendships. I have also become more outgoing in other ways, and have started to become involved in charitable organizations. There are always people out there who are worse off than you, and if you can take your mind off of yourself and your troubles for a little while and focus on helping other people, you might be surprised at how satisfying helping others can be.
Anyway, enough of my babbling. There is a medication out there that has your name on it. Your job is to try as many of them as it takes (under doctor supervision, of course)to find the one or combination of more than one that works best for you. Don't give up, because I have found that the people on this message board sincerely care about their fellow posters -- I think we have all felt like a genuine nutbar at one time or another -- but we support each other and get each other through the rough times. While it doesn't seem like it at times, God put everyone on this earth for a reason. Maybe you haven't found your purpose yet and things seem quite grim for you, but things will improve for you and you will realize that you are a valuable and worthy human being.
Have you posted to the psycho-social-babble board? It's great for posting about non-medication related issues, if you need to vent, or just want to talk with people about things happening in your life.
Good luck. We care about you.
poster:Mary Ann
thread:56082
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20010302/msgs/56084.html