Posted by Dwight on June 27, 2000, at 13:12:37
In reply to Re: nervous cant hold a proper conversation could add , posted by SarahB on June 22, 2000, at 17:47:28
Dear Wayne,
I have been diagnosed with both social phobia and ADD w/out hyperactivity. For me ADD can make conversation difficult because I am not always able to concentrate on what the person is saying. Sometimes I am thinking about something else or I am distracted by something, for instance, I am noticing something about the person's face or their gestures. ADD is closely linked to creativity and higher levels of intelligence. You may think of it in some ways as a blessing. But it depends on what you do with it. It is important to become aware of how you direct your attention. Do you, for instance, notice the sounds, smells, tastes, the feelings of things in your everyday environment? Or are you so caught up in internal thinking about yourself that you are oblivious. We may direct our attention outwards or inwards. One is not better than the other. They are different realms to be explored. Just ask yourself, what is my habitual tendency. Where is my attention usually directed? Or does it jump all over the place? I have found that asking myself these questions, just becoming more AWARE, is half the battle, half the cure. Once you become aware of how you direct your attention you can start to redirect in more productive ways. When you are with people just observe where you direct your attention. Meditation and/or deep relaxation can help. In order to watch yourself, in order to become aware, you must slow down. If your thoughts are racing, you will be aware of nothing but the thoughts. When you converse with someone try to direct your attention on them. Notice all you can about them. This will put you in a different place and you won't feel as if you are being watched or judged because you are the one who is watching. Yes, I have difficulty in conversations sometimes. But I am becoming more and more aware of why it happens. It can be very exciting to redirect your attention in new ways.
poster:Dwight
thread:37939
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20000619/msgs/38455.html