Posted by Rick on February 27, 2000, at 19:26:12
In reply to Re: Dang depressed, Part 2--The Alcohol, posted by Brenda on February 27, 2000, at 18:48:09
Hi Cass,
Just wanted to say that I understand your position about the AA meeting, and I know alot about them because I spent 4 straight years going to them. To this day, I have never wanted to return, although I know that AA has done many wonderful things for people, I just never felt like I fit in.
Since then, I have drank on and off...sometimes quite alot...binging I guess you would call it, and I too have had a history of smoking pot, and even using cocaine. I even tried crack twice. I say this not to "brag" or compare war stories, but to let you know that even though I have been down those roads, I wouldn't even consider accepting a "label" for them. They were times in my life when I was miserable, lonely, and searching for something that I did not know how to find, and to carry a label, to me, means that I would carry with me everyday the stigma of my actions being "who I am", and I refuse to do that.
I want to move on in my life.I, like others, have had absolutely NO desire to drink since I started my ADs. I can't really explain why except to say that I think my self-defeating lifestyle while drinking finally caught up with me, and the fact that I am dealing now with some "core issues" of inadequacy, I don't want to live in denial. I want to uncover them all, and deal with as much as I can.
I wish you the best of luck, in whatever you choose to do. Just remember one thing...be as painfully honest with yourself as you can, and you can't go wrong.
RICK
poster:Rick
thread:24347
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20000220/msgs/24431.html