Posted by anna on July 17, 1999, at 21:58:02
In reply to Re: add, & addiction, posted by Cynthia on July 13, 1999, at 22:40:23
> > Addiction is caused by the basic need to feel normal. but the guilt of addiction is a contributing factor to depression so it becomes a vicious cycle. Doctors are not to blame as they can only work on what they are told and their primary aim is to relieve suffering. Also addiction need not be a bad thing if it helps normalise a persons life and their relationships around them. The problem is often guilt caused by other health professionals who immediately label you as addicted and then dont treat the real cause of the problem (illness, add or depression). It will be very helpful for your husband if you are supportive and non judgemental. My marriage was rocky because my husband hated me for my addictions but now he has come to realise that it cant be helped and is better then a wife who is in constant pain and unable to lead a normal life. He basically leaves my health to me but is willing to talk about it IF i want to. Suicide occurs because we want to run away from our problems and can see no end to them. We may feel that our families will be better off without us, so it is important for you to let your husband know that you are their to help when needed and also step back when he needs to switch off from the problem. By that i mean dont let the problem be the primary focus in your lives. I hope this helps a little bit. It helps me writing and hopefully helping you so please respond with questions etc and i'll try to give my viewpoint on it all.
anna
,
> Hi Melinda,
>
> tough question. I really don't know what makes someone so vunerable to addiction. I know people with ADD generally have poor impulse control and people with mental illnesses desperately want to feel good. I imagine for each individual, there are many other less significant factors at work too.
>
> I don't think the medical community are to blame in my case. I'm willing to be addicted to feel good, but I just need some good monitoring checks in place (generally speaking I'm pretty vigilant with myself). If anything I worry about not being able to get my medications (some doctors in the past wouldn't give them to me).
>
> Maybe if your husband was treated for his ADD, he wouldn't accidentally overdose on Xanax and Lortab. He very well could be quite desperate to feel normal or good. No one wants to die, sometimes we just can't bare the pain and don't know how to ask for help. Many people, who are in this much pain, are very willing to talk about it if someone will listen without judging.
>
> I feel for you. Good luck
>
> Cynthia
poster:anna
thread:8148
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/19990628/msgs/8851.html