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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 17 of 17. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by Angela2 on October 5, 2014, at 13:27:06
I....nobody cares. I'm hurting here. Nobody in my life cares. That's such a great feeling. Insert sarcasm emote here.
Posted by Angela2 on October 5, 2014, at 13:43:03
In reply to Depression, posted by Angela2 on October 5, 2014, at 13:27:06
I also feel a lot of pressure. To "make something of myself." To get a job. To make money. To move out of my parents house. because I'm 31. I wish people loved me. I wish I wasn't so hard on myself. I wish I knew of a depression book that was less dating to read than the 4 I got out from the library. I need something easy, and not overwhelming with lots of text, lol.
Posted by obsidian on October 5, 2014, at 15:06:05
In reply to Re: Depression, posted by Angela2 on October 5, 2014, at 13:43:03
I like audiobooks myself, but I remember reading noonday demon years ago, and it must have not sucked because its
long and I got through it.
I am well acquainted with the "oh sh*t, I gotta get out of here" feeling. It is hard to make it financially, a sucky reality.
Posted by Phil on October 5, 2014, at 15:24:05
In reply to Re: Depression » Angela2, posted by obsidian on October 5, 2014, at 15:06:05
Noonday Demon was a great book.
Posted by Phil on October 5, 2014, at 16:04:55
In reply to Depression, posted by Angela2 on October 5, 2014, at 13:27:06
Nobody cares is familiar with me. Have you tried dbsa support groups or any support groups?
Your anxiety about your situation will just keep building. At least, I'm afraid it would.
I don't know your med situation so no input there.
You will only reach your goal if you can be calm enough to set tiny goals. You can also work on 'thinking above your thoughts: feeling above your feelings.' Whatever you think about is what you will get. Like it or not.
People like us have to find others like us. They will like us. Others can understand. Anything is better than nobody likes me because I doubt that is true.
Saying no one likes me makes it real. Thinking that thought then you will come to believe that no one likes you.Here's something I found online
Decide what it is you want.
Make a plan
Write it down
and work it
every
single
day.The correct mindset along with just being still and breathing will make you more hopeful. Instead of saying I have to get out of this house which is about as dark a thought as any. Drive around and see places you might want to live. Hell, go look at some apartments. Think of how you would arrange them, where your stuff would go.That will give you motivation and that's what you want.
If you do nothing and keep telling yourself negative messages you will not get well.
This will take a while so be patient. Never say negative things about yourself. don't sit around dwelling on the sorry state of your life. It is the worst path to take. Out think this sh*t.
Get outside.
Go to museums and soak in art. Play music that makes you feel good.
We often lose friends to our disease but we do not have to keep living that way. No one is friendless unless, at some level, they don't want friends.
One single day at a time. Don't project on forever. Be thankful for everything because what you are in the middle of is trying to teach you.
Every problem has a solution. Be calm, move slow. Didn't the turtle finish first? :)these are just things to think about. I'm doing these right now. Meds never do it all.
It is not I'll believe it when I see it
Rather, I will see it when I believe it.Eat right. Take care of yourself. Get medical attention if needed.
There are no magic solutions. You will have to change and maybe that is a part of the reason that you feel stuck. This isn't a problem, it's a fanf*ck*ngtastic opportunity to change your life.
Be grateful for good and bad. Sometimes the worst things are our best teachers.
pay the receptionist on your way out. five cents for this session.
Posted by Tomatheus on October 5, 2014, at 16:14:58
In reply to Re: Depression, posted by Angela2 on October 5, 2014, at 13:43:03
Angela,
I found "Back from the Brink" by Graeme Cowan to be fairly easy to get through. The book mostly consisted of stories of people with depression and bipolar disorder who seem to have overcome the worst of their mood-related struggles, and even though I wouldn't necessarily expect everyone with a mood disorder to recover from their illness by following the examples of the individuals who were profiled for the book, it was nice to read the short profiles that were included in the book. So, if you think that "Back from the Brink" might interest you and want something that's relatively easy to read, you might want to take a look at that book.
I also wanted to say that it's too bad that you're hurting right now and that nobody in your life seems to care. It can be difficult to cope with depression and other mood disturbances when the sources of support in our lives don't seem to be very interested in lending a listening ear or a helping hand. Are there any support groups for people with mood disorders near you that you might be interested in joining? Sometimes it helps to receive support from others who have been through struggles that are similar to your own.
Finally, I wanted to say that if you could possibly find some kind of activity to get involved with, preferably something that doesn't demand a great deal of your mental resources (especially if you're struggling a lot), that might help you to at least shift your focus away from the depression that you're experiencing. Even just accomplishing small things or doing a little something for somebody else might help to boost your confidence and get your mind focused on things that you can achieve, instead of what you're not currently achieving. I'm not suggesting that finding activities to get involved with will necessarily be a cure all, but if you think that getting involved in some kind of extra activity might be doable, it might help to propel you toward a higher level of productivity than what you're used to.
Before I finish, I do want to say to feel free to do what you feel is best with the suggestions that I made and to disregard anything that you feel might not be so helpful. I do hope that in some way, your feelings of depression will subside, and I also hope that you can begin to build a support system of sorts in your own life that you'll find to be helpful.
Take care,
Tomatheus
Posted by Phil on October 5, 2014, at 16:53:58
In reply to Depression, posted by Angela2 on October 5, 2014, at 13:27:06
Just do what you can. You have friends here.
This all sounds like rubbish when someone is depressed. I know the feeling of being lifeless and laying in bed for days and not showering for weeks. Depression is the worst.
Again, I don't know if you take meds but if you do, something has to be tweaked or replaced. You can't 'buzzword' yourself out of clinical depression. I for one wish it was easier.
There are a lot of youtube video's with people with every conceivable condition. Maybe try to find ones that are helpful.
facebook groups. Real time online meetings. Meetups in your area.
This is not your fault.
Posted by Angela2 on October 5, 2014, at 16:58:02
In reply to Re: Depression » Angela2, posted by Phil on October 5, 2014, at 16:04:55
Hey Phil,
Thanks. I think I'm going to print out your message and tack it on my wall, lol. ... what you wrote really resonated with me. Thanks again.
Take care.
Angela
Posted by Phil on October 5, 2014, at 17:07:28
In reply to Re: Depression » Phil, posted by Angela2 on October 5, 2014, at 16:58:02
Ha! Thanks Angela. I have little stickies everywhere because from one day to the next I forget stuff that really does help. Brush your teeth should be automatic. I have to write it down or I won't do it.
Besides these books I would recommend one old book. "The Road Less Traveled" by Scott Peck. It was a best seller for a decade and is still relevant. I listened to it in the car for a long time.
Fall down 9 times, get up 10.http://www.amazon.com/Top-Ten-Books-Depression/lm/RE9PDAV376VAM
Posted by Angela2 on October 5, 2014, at 17:08:32
In reply to Re: Depression » Angela2, posted by Tomatheus on October 5, 2014, at 16:14:58
Hi Tomatheus,
I will check out that book, I've never heard of it.
Yeah, I pretty much feel...like depression is the new normal, lol. The people in my life do care about me. But it seems like, they just don't have time to help. Though, they might not know how I'm feeling. Also, I have a friend who is really distant. And I've given up on her bc she cancels our meet ups all the time. But I was thinking about her earlier and how she doesn't care about me, and that made me feel worse. I know I need to surround myself with positive people. There's a few of them around me, but again, they have their own lives, like my mom, and a couple of my friends.I think money can be a real beotch sometimes. But I feel lucky that I get ssdi, for the time being. So at least there's something.
Support groups is a good idea. Those kind of things are hard for me to get myself to go to, a lot of the time...but maybe sometime in the future. I've also thought about church. There's a church I really want to go back to that I used to go to.
Take care Tomatheus.
Posted by Angela2 on October 5, 2014, at 17:11:43
In reply to Re: Depression » Angela2, posted by obsidian on October 5, 2014, at 15:06:05
Hey Obsidian. Yeah maybe I will check out audiobooks. It seems to help me process more when I'm listening and reading the same thing, or listening, while doodling / drawing. I have seen the noonday demon at the library before. I've always imagined it would be too overwhelming to read, but I've never actually picked up the book to even look at the inside flap so, yeah.
Posted by Angela2 on October 5, 2014, at 17:26:17
In reply to Re: Depression » Angela2, posted by Phil on October 5, 2014, at 17:07:28
Lol, well, it's a good idea. I forget too. sometimes I'm so wise and then there are times like this when I'm like, "waaah the world is over.." I think that I want my focus to be on overcoming my depression. Or, recovering from it anyways. I know that I want to move out and also have a steady and stable job. But maybe I need to focus on this first.
I will talk to my therapist and psych nurse this week. I suppose I should try a med change. Though it kinda scares me.
Posted by Phillipa on October 5, 2014, at 18:18:38
In reply to Re: Depression, posted by Angela2 on October 5, 2014, at 17:26:17
The Road Less Traveled is a great book. Phillipa
Posted by Phil on October 5, 2014, at 20:39:17
In reply to Depression, posted by Angela2 on October 5, 2014, at 13:27:06
must watch this. Andrew Solomon author of The Noonday Demon. 29 minutes. Eloquent doesn't come close to describing this guy.
http://www.ted.com/talks/andrew_solomon_depression_the_secret_we_share
Posted by 10derheart on October 6, 2014, at 0:13:18
In reply to Re: Depression » Angela2, posted by obsidian on October 5, 2014, at 15:06:05
:-) I heard it was good, too. Forgot all about it. Hope I read one day when not buried in textbooks.....
Posted by gadchik on October 6, 2014, at 12:37:04
In reply to double double quote - link » obsidian, posted by 10derheart on October 6, 2014, at 0:13:18
Noonday Demon - I read it cover to cover.
Posted by obsidian on October 9, 2014, at 18:01:31
In reply to double double quote - link » obsidian, posted by 10derheart on October 6, 2014, at 0:13:18
I hear ya about the textbooks, I've taken on some coursework. It's a bit grueling for me at the moment.
But today I went to the botanical gardens near me, so nice.
I was just being lazy with the quotes. :-)
This is the end of the thread.
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