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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 4 to 28 of 83. Go back in thread:
Posted by Gee on January 18, 2007, at 15:53:11
In reply to Re: I feel upset, I can't study, posted by Deneb on January 18, 2007, at 15:49:33
I'm just really really bored. I'm sorry you're having such a hard time studying!! What have you gotten done so far?
In the past hour and a half (maybe two hours) I've gotten the definitions of 30 words written out for one of my quizes next week. Now, just reading, research, and more vocab left to do... does it ever end?
Posted by one woman cine on January 18, 2007, at 16:00:49
In reply to Re: I feel upset, I can't study, posted by Deneb on January 18, 2007, at 15:49:33
Posted by Deneb on January 18, 2007, at 16:11:11
In reply to Deneb, please call your pdoc.... (nm) » Deneb, posted by one woman cine on January 18, 2007, at 16:00:49
My pdoc doesn't want me to call her.
Deneb*
Posted by one woman cine on January 18, 2007, at 16:16:11
In reply to Re: Deneb, please call your pdoc.... » one woman cine, posted by Deneb on January 18, 2007, at 16:11:11
She said this? She said, "deneb, don't call me"?
Posted by Deneb on January 18, 2007, at 16:25:27
In reply to Re: Deneb, please call your pdoc.... » Deneb, posted by one woman cine on January 18, 2007, at 16:16:11
> She said this? She said, "deneb, don't call me"?
No, she didn't say that, but I'm sure she doesn't want me to call her everytime I want to hurt myself. She doesn't need to be bothered like that. If I want to talk to her I need to make an appointment. Even if I were to call her, I'm almost certain I wouldn't be able to talk with her. The best that could happen would be I would go on the waiting list for a cancellation appointment.
Deneb*
Posted by one woman cine on January 18, 2007, at 16:26:47
In reply to Re: Deneb, please call your pdoc.... » one woman cine, posted by Deneb on January 18, 2007, at 16:25:27
If you haven't asked her?
Posted by Deneb on January 18, 2007, at 16:30:41
In reply to How can you be sure? » Deneb, posted by one woman cine on January 18, 2007, at 16:26:47
I can't be 100% sure.
She has never said I should call her while in crisis.
Deneb*
Posted by one woman cine on January 18, 2007, at 16:38:25
In reply to Re: How can you be sure? » one woman cine, posted by Deneb on January 18, 2007, at 16:30:41
Deneb,
A pdoc, or anyone for that matter cannot plan on all contingencies that "could possibly" happen. They are not mind-readers.
If a patient is not feeling well, the doc has no way of knowing that.
In dr/patient relationships, the dr. has a responsibilty to care for you. The patient
takes responsibility for their own health and well-being and chooses to call when not feeling well.If you choose to not do this, then there can be no further discussion - you made your decision.
I hope you feel better soon. Good luck.
Posted by Annierose on January 18, 2007, at 16:39:51
In reply to Re: How can you be sure? » one woman cine, posted by Deneb on January 18, 2007, at 16:30:41
Deneb -
I rarely read adminstration. I know that recently some issues have been brought forward between you and another poster.
Maybe give yourself permission not to read those threads. They are not helpful to you. It just hurts you. I know that if I read them and they were talking about me it would hurt my feelings.
I tend to shy away from confrontation as I have a hard time dealing with people's anger.
It's kind of reminds me of what mother's tell their children, "Don't touch the stove or your fingers will get burned." So in this instance, don't read things that may hurt your feelings.
Be kind to yourself.
Posted by Deneb on January 18, 2007, at 16:59:46
In reply to Re: How can you be sure? » Deneb, posted by Annierose on January 18, 2007, at 16:39:51
Thanks for the suggestion Annierose.
I can't stop checking for new posts. I need a lot of attention right now. What should I do?
Deneb*
Posted by Phillipa on January 18, 2007, at 17:02:20
In reply to Re: How can you be sure?, posted by Deneb on January 18, 2007, at 16:59:46
Deneb what do you usually do when you feel this way? Talk it out? Love Phillipa ps I'll check out admin I usally don't go there.
Posted by karen_kay on January 18, 2007, at 17:11:16
In reply to Re: How can you be sure?, posted by Deneb on January 18, 2007, at 16:59:46
i'm pretty sure that none of us here at babble can give you the attention you need. why not try calling your pdoc?
sweetie, i'm sorry that you hurt. i really am. but, there's really nothing that we can do to help. you need to get outside, real life help.
and perhaps you should weigh the pros and cons of babble. i'm not suggesting you leave. if you were to, you'd be missed by many people here. but, if babble's causing you this much distress (and interupting your studying, which leads to bad grades, which leads to you 'mini-oding', feeling horrible, ect), then why do you continue to do this to yourself dear?
i hope you are safe and i hope you find the attention and help you need.
kk
Posted by Deneb on January 18, 2007, at 17:13:29
In reply to Re: How can you be sure? » Deneb, posted by Phillipa on January 18, 2007, at 17:02:20
I wish everything would go back to normal. I wish everyone liked me. I wish no one would be upset.
I just want the nightmare to end. When is it going to get better? At this rate, Babble is doing more harm than good.
I will never leave Babble. No one will force me away, no matter what. I will never stop going to chat. I will never stop posting. I'll post whenever I want to and chat whenever I want to. I'm not going to let anything stop me from doing this.
I don't care if people hate me, I'm never leaving Babble.
Deneb*
Posted by Gee on January 18, 2007, at 17:15:32
In reply to Re: How can you be sure?, posted by Deneb on January 18, 2007, at 17:13:29
Deneb, KK didn't say that you should leave, but maybe just think about whether or not it's benificial for you to have in your life.
How's the studying going BTW?
Posted by Deneb on January 18, 2007, at 17:22:26
In reply to Re: How can you be sure? » Deneb, posted by Gee on January 18, 2007, at 17:15:32
> Deneb, KK didn't say that you should leave, but maybe just think about whether or not it's benificial for you to have in your life.
>
> How's the studying going BTW?I'm taking environmental physiology, environmental science, molecular evolution and conservation biology. I haven't studied today.
I like Babble. My friends and Dr. Bob are here. I'm never leaving as long as I'm alive. Actually, if ghosts exists, I wouldn't leave Babble even after death. No one can force me to go away.
Deneb*
Posted by Llurpsie_Noodle on January 18, 2007, at 17:33:57
In reply to Re: How can you be sure?, posted by Deneb on January 18, 2007, at 17:22:26
((((Deneb))))
I'm not reading admin right now.
here's my suggestion to you
and some hugs too (((Deneb)))
cause you need attention, that's okay. Thank you for telling us. Makes it easier for me to support my friend (((Deneb my friend)))
Try turning off the computer for the next 60 minutes. Distract yourself by watching TV, or staring out the window, taking a bath, or reading a book. Heck, you might even open your molecular whatchamacallit book and draw some pretty benzene rings for me ((((benzene rings))))
do you prefer the chair conformation or the other one (I already forgot!)
and I'll ttyl, okay sweetie ?
take care of you. Agitation sucks.
((((((and more hugs))))))))
where's miow miow? Can you give him some quality Deneb-time?
later tater,
-Ll
Posted by karen_kay on January 18, 2007, at 17:47:21
In reply to Re: How can you be sure?, posted by Deneb on January 18, 2007, at 17:22:26
i know you aren't suggesting that i'm asking you to leave. right?
perhaps it would do you some good to reread my post to you deneb.
i know that if posts at babble left me with feelings of wanting to die (kill myself, od or whatever) then i wouldn't be here. however, that's me personally. and i know my own personal limitations here at babble. (i, from time to time, post extremely mean posts to people i love here, if i feel i need a break. they are in good fun of course, but that's what i do to protect myself. from others and also protect others from me. because that's how i am. i think about others and my impact on them, or try to at least)
i'm not saying 'deneb, you need to leave babble.' if that's what i meant, i would have said just that. what i am saying is that if babble is causing you more harm than good, you need to think about that.
bear with me, i'm almost done. if you are using babble as your only source of 'help', you really need to change that strategy. as it's been said here many times, there's not a whole lot that we can do to help you. and it seems, when we try, you don't respond with anything but 'i need more help. i need more attention. i need...' deneb hun, what you need is real life help. don't count on babble to give you everything you need when hurting, because it's impossible for babble to be that.
i realize this place can be hurtful at times. or, one can be hurt by posts they read. but, you need to also remember how much it hurts those of us reading who are facing hard times. you can't only think about the hurt you're going through. also think about those of us who are getting hurt as well.good luck deneb. i hope you 'hang in there' and get the help you need, both from babble and in real ife.
Posted by karen_kay on January 18, 2007, at 17:52:39
In reply to hey now! » Deneb, posted by karen_kay on January 18, 2007, at 17:47:21
if you want someone to talk to.
Posted by tofuemmy on January 18, 2007, at 18:33:36
In reply to Re: How can you be sure?, posted by Deneb on January 18, 2007, at 17:22:26
Deneb - On that Admin thread I posted a link to a DBT site where you can find info on Distress Tolerance. I think that's what you need...to learn how to better tolerate feeling crappy, and how to get out of that lousy place.
Emmy
Posted by NikkiT2 on January 19, 2007, at 4:21:07
In reply to Re: How can you be sure?, posted by Deneb on January 18, 2007, at 17:13:29
Deneb,
I know you want to post hat ever and when ever you want, but part of being an adult and taking responsibility for our lives, is doing things appropriately.. just because someone doesn't want to talk to you, you don't have to pressure them. Sometimes just walking away is so much better for everyone.. I know i doesn't always feel like the best thing for oneself, but its an annoying fact of life that we do have to consider everyone around us.
You mentioned on the admin thread that you can call the distress centre. So please, call them. Start learning how and when to call them..
Because one day one of your mini overdoses will do more than give you a nosebleed, and there wil be nothing else any of us can do about it, other than be left with immense guilt, as you have so often make it our fault.
In the morning call your pdoc. if she "doesn't let you call" the you need a different one.. its her JOB to keep you alive deneb, and her job to allow you to call, atleast in working hours.
Does she honestly not seem bothered when you tell you about your overdoses? If she doesn't, the I feel very very worried, and would even consider reporting her, as this is not professional behaviour.
Posted by one woman cine on January 19, 2007, at 8:05:53
In reply to Re: How can you be sure? » Deneb, posted by NikkiT2 on January 19, 2007, at 4:21:07
If a patient has symptoms of OD'ing and cannot get in touch with a pdoc, then a normal course of action is to go to the ER - of course I have never heard of not being able to get in touch with a pdoc - they have pagers and numbers to call because if patients cannot get in touch with them and a medical emergency occurs, they can be sued for malpractice.
Also, it is common practice for pdoc's to assess patients needs and see if they can accommodate those needs. Ususally they can, but if more intensive help is needed over the long term (& they can't provide that), they are usually referred to someone who can provide that help.
This is the pdoc's side of accountability and responsibility.
The patients responsibility is to call when appropriate, especially when a emergency like an OD occurs. (OD's are OD's)
If you are a diabetic and do not take your insulin & go into a coma - then what to do? That aspect of treatment is the patients responsibility.
I don't think this is a case of professional misconduct. Deneb has herself stated that she doesn't call her pdoc (or other resources) or seek help after an overdose, although her symptoms would call for medical attention. (I would say nosebleeds etc. are a sign of needing medical assessment.)Patients and docs work to together and they both have their own responsibilty and accountability in the relationship. If one or the other fails to do that, the relationship fails and the patient cannot get the help they need.
If you're interested - or anyone else for that matter - I have an article I can send you, (a link actually) about how this is handled on the pdoc's part. I don't want to link to it here, it might be too triggering.
Posted by Glydin on January 19, 2007, at 8:34:15
In reply to Re: How can you be sure? » one woman cine, posted by Deneb on January 18, 2007, at 16:30:41
> I can't be 100% sure.
>
> She has never said I should call her while in crisis.
>~~~ For me, that begs the question: If NOT then, when SHOULD you call her????
It has been pointed out, it is your call as when to call for help. Also, the fact you have posted before that one of the ways of dealing with your ODs is posting about them. I'm keeping in mind that this board allows for this type of disclosure... However, I hope you discuss with your pdoc how that plan is working out for you and the responses and reactions you receive from other posters. Babble can be a adjunct for some but this board is completely out of it's ability when it comes to helping someone in an OD or chronic thoughts of OD as coping. FAQ's on this board are clear as to the instructions of informing the person to get RL help. Many, many posters have instructed you to do just that.....
I also am very puzzled when I hear someone discuss *actively* self-harming with death potential and hearing the it's treated almost like a doc knows it's just what they do.... carry on.... I guess I'm old school but back in the day, this was an immediate ticket to a place where one could be kept safe.
Posted by one woman cine on January 19, 2007, at 8:57:29
In reply to Re: How can you be sure? *trigger* » Deneb, posted by Glydin on January 19, 2007, at 8:34:15
Posted by Llurpsie_Noodle on January 19, 2007, at 9:50:34
In reply to Re: How can you be sure? *trigger* » Deneb, posted by Glydin on January 19, 2007, at 8:34:15
Deneb,
you are still learning how to deal with intense feelings like stress, anxiety, strife, sadness, etc.These feelings cause distress in all of us, you're not alone. You can and will learn how to manage these feelings and how to learn to live through a crisis. The best way to learn is with someone who can monitor you, and who will be available to you in a crisis.
Maybe you and your current pdoc/T have some history that makes you uncomfortable talking about "when should I call you? are you available if I feel really bad this weekend? etc."
If you cannot talk to your T/pdoc about these issues, then who? Think about what an ideal relationship with your T would be like. What do you "want" from that relationship. what do you "need" from that relationship. I'm convinced that your relationship with pdoc/T is THE MOST IMPORTANT factor to your feeling better and learning to deal with distress.
your friend,
-Ll
Posted by Llurpsie_Noodle on January 19, 2007, at 9:51:07
In reply to dealing with intense feelings » Glydin, posted by Llurpsie_Noodle on January 19, 2007, at 9:50:34
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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
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