Psycho-Babble Social Thread 611273

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Bittersweet anniversary - *trigger* (long)

Posted by Sabrina_0805 on February 19, 2006, at 23:45:15

Today, marks the first annivesary of when I felt that I could not go on anymore and felt the only way out was to end the pain.

I almost did not survive. I spent a couple of days in the ER of a psychiatric hospital and about about 3 weeks after that surrounded by the safety of being allowed to be miserable. I also underwent ECT treatment during this time.

I came out of hospital more depressed than ever, left my job and career, lost my income and almost lost my family - and I started the slow incline to where I am today.

It has been a tough year but one of personal growth and determination. I still have many many issues that I deal with daily, or that I sweep under the carpet to deal with tomorrow, but I am stronger and happier than I can ever remember being. After seeing me **pour crimson regret and betrayal**, my husband has come to love me more, and I think he has forgiven me the hurt I caused him.

I have forgiven myself. If I had not done this I wouldn't (or perhaps couldn't) have grown to where I am today.

I guess I realized that I needed a helping hand. And I found two .......... at the end of each of my arms.

I lost contact with babble for a number of months. And I missed the friendships that I have made and the support and love I received.

I have been babbling a lot recently - and it has brought me much peace. Thank you for that!

I am very happy that I am here today.

Sabrina

** borrowed from a song called My Tourniquet by Evanescence

 

Re: Bittersweet anniversary - *trigger* (long) » Sabrina_0805

Posted by Deneb on February 20, 2006, at 0:14:39

In reply to Bittersweet anniversary - *trigger* (long), posted by Sabrina_0805 on February 19, 2006, at 23:45:15

I'm glad you're with us today. :-)

Be proud of yourself for working hard and getting to where you are today.

Let the anniversary be a reminder of how much you've improved rather than how horrible things were.

Deneb

 

Re: Bittersweet anniversary - *trigger* (long)

Posted by caraher on February 20, 2006, at 9:37:42

In reply to Bittersweet anniversary - *trigger* (long), posted by Sabrina_0805 on February 19, 2006, at 23:45:15

Congratulations on making it to where you are today! I'm full of admiration...

(((Sabrina)))

 

Re: Bittersweet anniversary - *trigger* (long)

Posted by Phillipa on February 20, 2006, at 19:26:11

In reply to Re: Bittersweet anniversary - *trigger* (long), posted by caraher on February 20, 2006, at 9:37:42

Congratulations how the heck did you do it even with the ECT not working. You are one heck of a strong person I admire you. Fondly, Phillipa

 

Re: Bittersweet anniversary - *trigger* (long)

Posted by cablegirl on February 21, 2006, at 14:17:34

In reply to Bittersweet anniversary - *trigger* (long), posted by Sabrina_0805 on February 19, 2006, at 23:45:15

Congratulations Sabrina!!!

Although I did not know you a year ago on that horrible day......you have now become one of my
dear and closest friends. I think my lucky stars everyday for your friendship and that you are still here to share your life with me!

KEEP UP THE GOOD WORK!!!!

Lots of Love & Hugs to you my friend!!

CABLEGIRL


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