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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 25 of 25. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by iris2 on September 13, 2004, at 10:45:39
Hi Everyone,
My name is Irene. I started to read a acouple of posts here but I thought it more prudent to ask posters their opinion.
What is this board all about? What kinds of things do people post here?
I am very lonely and have few people kto talk to. Is this a place I could discuss things going on in my life? Specifically maybe those things related to my depression? Or is it somewhere where people discuss anything on their mind regardless whether it is "directly" related to their particular mental health issue?
Just wanted some input so that I have some feeling for what this board is all about.
I will try and read a few more posts in the mean time.Thanks all.
Irene
Posted by partlycloudy on September 13, 2004, at 11:01:44
In reply to New Today, Questioning What's it all about, posted by iris2 on September 13, 2004, at 10:45:39
Here is the place where we whine, beg for advice, offer unsolicited opinions, tell jokes, and cry out loud.
Here is a place where you don't have to be alone in your depression anymore.
There are different boards for different subjects, and this board is for what doesn't fit into those categories.
Nice to meet you,
partlycloudy
Posted by iris2 on September 13, 2004, at 11:06:30
In reply to Hello and welcome! » iris2, posted by partlycloudy on September 13, 2004, at 11:01:44
> Here is a place where you don't have to be alone in your depression anymore.
> Nice to meet you,
> partlycloudy
>Partlycloudy,
Thanks. Tsi si what I am looking for. Looking forward to psoting with you.
Irene
Posted by partlycloudy on September 13, 2004, at 12:14:50
In reply to Re: Hello and welcome! » partlycloudy, posted by iris2 on September 13, 2004, at 11:06:30
What kind of a day are you having? I'm shell shocked from getting ready for a hurricane that seems to have changed its mind.
I don't have the energy to exercise even though it makes me feel better. I want to drink even though I know it makes me feel worse.
OK - your turn.
:)
Posted by iris2 on September 13, 2004, at 13:05:33
In reply to OK, I'll start. » iris2, posted by partlycloudy on September 13, 2004, at 12:14:50
Don't drink. I went through that for a long time. It's ot worth it.
I do not feel okay doing anything, but I promised to meet this new friend and go for a short bike ride and then kyaking. Both are new to me. I have been feeling a little better since I started a new med a little over a month ago. I never usually have any energy to do anything either. I never clean my home or do daily living activities.
Maybe you can find something else to do so that you do not feel like drinking? Watch TV perhaps that is what I do with most of my time. It might not make you feel much better but at least it will not make you feel worse. I do not mean to be preachy. I have no room to be. I was a coke addict and still at timese drink even though it makes me feel worse most of the time too.Well here I go. This is big as just the driving part I could not do a month ago. I do not think this guy understands how momentous what he has asked me to do is for me. I will feel like I occomplished a lot if I go out and bike a little. Even if I just make the hour long drive and do nothing else it is a big accomplishment.
Thanks for starting a conversation. Do you check out other threads and see if you have something to contribute? That is what I do on the one other board I make use of.I have to go meet him now so I will write more later. Perhaps you can tell me more about yourself and how you managed NOT to drink today. Well eccept soda and water:)
irene
Posted by partlycloudy on September 13, 2004, at 13:35:44
In reply to Re: OK, I'll start. » partlycloudy, posted by iris2 on September 13, 2004, at 13:05:33
I'm usually on this board, the Book, Health, Substance, and sometimes the Admin board, although that isn't usually a good thing (I let my fingers get carried away). I always check the main Babble board too for people new to meds or to ask or share experiences about my meds.
I'm bipolar2, have GAD and panic attacks. The booze has been a thread throughout my life. I have stopped before, but when I felt into this last pit, I also fell back into a martini. I'm seeing a p-doc, a therapist, and getting EMDR therapy too, which is coming to an end.
What I found distressing about where I live lately is that EVERYONE was just so anxious and nervous about hurricanes and damage, and it was inescapable. Plus this past weekend we boarded up our big windows, and then... nothing. I have like a rebound depression from sitting and waiting for a big non-event.
Mostly you will find that I post here A LOT. I hope with all my words that I can help even one person. SOmetimes I have to call on the strength of all the Babblers to pull me through.
I'm on effexor, wellbutrin, ambien, and xanax.
pc
Posted by saw on September 14, 2004, at 1:07:23
In reply to Re: OK, I'll start. » iris2, posted by partlycloudy on September 13, 2004, at 13:35:44
Hi Irene
I do my rounds on all the boards, just in case I may be able to contribute something. The social board is my favourite though. Here I have cried, moaned, felt sorry for myself AND laughed a whole lot. I am sure you will enjoy the friendship here.
Take care
Sabrina
Posted by iris2 on September 14, 2004, at 11:39:15
In reply to Re: OK, I'll start. » iris2, posted by partlycloudy on September 13, 2004, at 13:35:44
> I'm bipolar2, have GAD and panic attacks. I'm seeing a p-doc, a therapist, and getting EMDR therapy too, which is coming to an end.
>
What is BAD and EMDR? I probably should know but not well at acronyms.Well you're not on too many meds. Which is good as long as what you are on is helping you.
I went out and drove, bicycled and kayaked yesterday. More than I have done in a day for a long time. When I got back home I felt just as bad as if I never tried at all. I am bulimic and had a major episode right after I got home.
I have atypical depression, bulimic, personality disorder. I take Ritalin, oxycontin, Valium, klonopin and perphenazine. I just started amisulpride. Something actually for depression! I have a bladder disease called interstitial cystitis which makes it almost impossible for me to take most meds. This is why I take this odd combination, as I have not been able to tolerate other antidepressants I tried or usually they did not work even if I could take them. I can take 50mg of amisulpride with some bladder problems. When I tried to increase the dose I felt mentally better but I had a lot of frequency/urgency/pain. That's my story and I'm sticking to it!
Did you drink yesterday? I think someone should put you on the spot but maybe it should not be me. Up to you. I can understand how or why you end up drinking but that does not negate the fact the by your own admission it is harmful to you. I think a lot of this stuff becomes like a routine after a time. A knee-jerk response to certain stimuli. We need, first recognize them for what they are, and then change our responses. Sometimes if we know what we are doing is harmful to ourselves we need to just change our routines regardless of how it feels. After doing something for a while it becomes routine. I have a great book about this stuff if you are interested let me know. It is not about addiction or drinking but I find it encompasses almost everything in my life.
What if any plans do you have to deal with your drinking? Do you see it as a big problem? Does it interfere with functioning? Would you rather I did not talk so much about it?
At least you are not alone in the anxiety about the hurricane. Can you take refuge in the fact that everyone else is as worked up as you? Hence it is not your illness!
I tend to be somewhat introspective and self absorbed. Sorry. I have two objectives in posting on any board. One is to ask questions and the other is to try and help. If anything I write helps one person just one time I would feel good about it all.
Hope I have not bored you too much. I tend to write a lot.Irene
Posted by partlycloudy on September 14, 2004, at 12:05:25
In reply to Re: OK, I'll start. » partlycloudy, posted by iris2 on September 14, 2004, at 11:39:15
> > I'm bipolar2, have GAD and panic attacks. I'm seeing a p-doc, a therapist, and getting EMDR therapy too, which is coming to an end.
GAD = Generalized Anxiety Disorder
EMDR = Eye Movement Desensitization ReprocessingThere are soooo many acronyms around!!
>
> Did you drink yesterday? I think someone should put you on the spot but maybe it should not be me. Up to you. I can understand how or why you end up drinking but that does not negate the fact the by your own admission it is harmful to you.I'm not on the spot at all. Two dry days in a row. The big test for me is when my husband travels. I actually race to get that first drink in me, even before I take off my shoes. My EMDR therapy (about which I've posted on the Psych board) tells you a little about that experience.
>I have a great book about this stuff if you are interested let me know. It is not about addiction or drinking but I find it encompasses almost everything in my life.
I'd love to know the title - I'm open to any helpful suggestions!
>
> What if any plans do you have to deal with your drinking? Do you see it as a big problem? Does it interfere with functioning? Would you rather I did not talk so much about it?
>
I am what they call a "functional" alcoholic. It's never interfered with my work, haven't missed any days being sick with it. The impact on all other areas in my life has been significant. I have been to AA, tried Rational Recover, Women in Sobriety, and Smart Recovery. While they all have their advantages, I have decided that my path to sobriety will be one of my own, incorporating elements of all these systems, and more. I actually encourage people to talk to me about drinking, since it's so prevalent in those with depression, and such a misunderstood behaviour (IMO - In My Opinion).> Hope I have not bored you too much. I tend to write a lot.
>
I enjoy the correspondence! Thanks for asking and listening, Irene. It really helps me to get it all out of my brain.pc
Posted by iris2 on September 14, 2004, at 13:35:37
In reply to Re: OK, I'll start. » iris2, posted by partlycloudy on September 14, 2004, at 12:05:25
> EMDR = Eye Movement Desensitization Reprocessing> My EMDR therapy (about which I've posted on the Psych board) tells you a little about that experience.
Can you give me a link to where you posted about the EMDR. I have heard about this before and am interested in the therapy.
>I actually race to get that first drink in me, even before I take off my shoes. >
>
I know this routine. Are you hiding it from your husband? Or does he or you prefer you not to drink when he is there?> I'd love to know the title - I'm open to any helpful suggestions!
The title is: "The Power of Full Engagement"
> >
> I am what they call a "functional" alcoholic. It's never interfered with my work, haven't missed any days being sick with it. The impact on all other areas in my life has been significant. I have been to AA, tried Rational Recover, Women in Sobriety, and Smart Recovery. While they all have their advantages, I have decided that my path to sobriety will be one of my own, incorporating elements of all these systems, and more. I actually encourage people to talk to me about drinking, since it's so prevalent in those with depression, and such a misunderstood behavior (IMO - In My Opinion).I was addicted to cocaine and went to rehab and stopped. I went to AA and tried Rational Recovery (all they did at the meetings I went to was trash AA) my worst addiction was smoking. It took me years to quit. I had a lot of incentive as I have allergic asthma and had chronic bronchitis. I took cough medicine with codeine in it for several years just so I could sleep without coughing, as my lungs were full of flem.
I used to drink a lot more than I do now. I was pretty much the same as you. I functioned at work. It is my personal experience that quitting an addiction has to be first and foremost a personal decision. For me for it to work it had to have some finality to it. If it does not interfere with a lot of functioning you probably do not have as much incentive to quit. I know it makes the depression worse. Have you ever quit long enough to see if it really made a significant difference in your depression or your life? I started Parnate the first time and was in the midst of the worst of the cocaine habit. I knew the Parnate was like a wonder drug for me but it did not affect my functioning and my ability to utilize this newfound happiness until I quit the cocaine.
Some of my perspective on these issues.
irene
Posted by iris2 on September 14, 2004, at 13:46:32
In reply to It's a nice place to be, posted by saw on September 14, 2004, at 1:07:23
Sabrina,
Thanks. I'll try my best. It just takes me a long time to read and then post. Maybe I'll get some kind of rythm going and take an hour on each board or something. I'll have to try different things.
This seems like it would be a good place for me. I want to talk about other things besides meds.
irene
Posted by partlycloudy on September 14, 2004, at 14:15:59
In reply to Re: OK, I'll start. » partlycloudy, posted by iris2 on September 14, 2004, at 13:35:37
> Can you give me a link to where you posted about the EMDR. I have heard about this before and am interested in the therapy.
The main site is EMDR.com, and my therapist was trained by Francine Shapiro, who developed the tecchnique. It's often used for Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, or PTSD - another acronym for you!
> Re: drinking. I know this routine. Are you hiding it from your husband? Or does he or you prefer you not to drink when he is there?
I admitted that I am hiding it from him about 2 months ago, which is when I started doing it a month before. It shamed me immensely to tell him, but I am trying to be as honest as I can. He was miffed I was buying my own instead of consuming what we already had, but then I didn't want him to know what I was doing. I do not pretend it isn't a problem, and the onlt time I drink when he's home is if he's taking a nap. Pretty sorry scenario.
>It is my personal experience that quitting an addiction has to be first and foremost a personal decision. For me for it to work it had to have some finality to it. If it does not interfere with a lot of functioning you probably do not have as much incentive to quit. I know it makes the depression worse. Have you ever quit long enough to see if it really made a significant difference in your depression or your life?
I went dry for a year and a half. I was actually cycling from depression to hypomania every few months. I was under the care of one practical nurse after another (never saw the same one twice), so I would start on an antidepressant, feel mich better after 4 months or so, taper off with their supervision, and eventually crash. What sent me for professional treatment was that the duration of being unmedicated and OK became shorter and shorter until I was basically crying all day long. I was given a dx that I outlined earlier, and started reading about the conditions.
I've made the decision to not drink just about every day for the last 10 years of my life. I have had varying success, lately NO success, as evident from my recent posts. I don't want to end up like my father - dead at 53 years of age, with 3 out of 4 children estranged (yes, I was the one still close to him); and I also know that not wanting to drink and not doing it are different issues. Hence my stepped up efforts with my therapists.
Irene - I truly value your opinions and insights, and although it might seem that I am baring my soul here in this very public forum, a big part of why I do this is to let others like me know they are not alone.
Thanks again,
pc
Posted by partlycloudy on September 14, 2004, at 14:23:17
In reply to Working on my problems » iris2, posted by partlycloudy on September 14, 2004, at 14:15:59
To my EMDR post:
http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20040911/msgs/390615.html
Sorry about that. Eyes are quicker than the brain these days.
pc
Posted by iris2 on September 14, 2004, at 23:45:55
In reply to Working on my problems » iris2, posted by partlycloudy on September 14, 2004, at 14:15:59
partlycloudy,
> I was under the care of one practical nurse after another (never saw the same one twice), so I would start on an antidepressant, feel mich better after 4 months or so, taper off with their supervision, and eventually crash. What sent me for professional treatment was that the duration of being unmedicated and OK became shorter and shorter until I was basically crying all day long.
What kind of care did you get from practical nurse? Was this in concert with a doctor of some kind?>I don't want to end up like my father - dead at 53 years of age, with 3 out of 4 children estranged (yes, I was the one still close to him); and I also know that not wanting to drink and not doing it are different issues. Hence my stepped up efforts with my therapists.
So you do have some impetuous or something more than just thinking it would be better not to drink to quit. Do you have your liver checked periodically? I know a little about this as I have several friends with Hep C. This is important. How is your weight holding up? If I can be so bold how is your eliminating (bathroom)? Are you having problems eating or going too loosely?
You are not alone either. I just met you and already value your friendship. So as your friend I must insist that you take better care of yourself. I have no room to talk believe me:)Take care,
Irene
Posted by partlycloudy on September 15, 2004, at 4:24:26
In reply to Re: Working on my problems » partlycloudy, posted by iris2 on September 14, 2004, at 23:45:55
I never saw my GP, just the nurse practioners. One would quit, the next one would put me on something else, then she'd leave. it was bogus. You'd call the office and spend 40 minutes on hold.
My liver is healthy. I have it checked several times a year. My weight is constant. I had been gaining steadily with all the different AD's but I am exercising now so it's starting to come off slowly. I eat very healthily - lots of fruit and veg, hardly any meat, but love fish. My digestion (ahem) has been sluggish but I keep chuggin water. I take a multivitamin, vitamin E, and I'm adding soy to help with hot flashes. Life is SO interesting!
Considering I'm a drunk I take pretty good care of my body.
Thanks, Mom - I mean, Irene. Mom doesn't care about this stuff.
Posted by iris2 on September 15, 2004, at 8:37:57
In reply to Re: Working on my problems » iris2, posted by partlycloudy on September 15, 2004, at 4:24:26
Sounds like you are taking care of yourself and that the alcohol is not adversly affecting your digestion. When I drank regularly I had the runs (blatant) all the time. I had a friend who drank every day also but longer than I ever have. She could not keep food down much and everything went right through her to the point that she had a problem going out of the house sometimes. That is why I asked. I need to Mother myself. I never have my liver checked. I see my GP next week and with all the medications I have taken over the past several years I am going to have him check my liver.
Sorry if I was being overly maternal!
irene
Posted by partlycloudy on September 15, 2004, at 8:52:43
In reply to Re: Working on my problems » partlycloudy, posted by iris2 on September 15, 2004, at 8:37:57
No, I am happy to find all the extra moms out there as I can; mine is rather indifferent. Your concern really touches me.
I also find that yoga helps with liver function and digestion overall.
be well,
pc
Posted by iris2 on September 15, 2004, at 9:42:53
In reply to Re: Working on my problems » iris2, posted by partlycloudy on September 15, 2004, at 8:52:43
pc,
I need to get back to my yoga. I have done it sporadically the past ten years or so. My arthritis got so bad it is a whole different experience now.
My mother is not exactly what one would describe as nurturing. I used to be very angry about it all. Now I realize that she tries hard to give what she can but she cannot even nurture herself so I have to set my expectations low. I guess I try hard not to be like her at least in that way.
Posted by partlycloudy on September 15, 2004, at 10:08:27
In reply to Re: Working on my problems » partlycloudy, posted by iris2 on September 15, 2004, at 9:42:53
My mom does the best to her abilities. I said the other day that I've made a full circle in how I see her. First I considered her a heroine (for escaping marriage with my dad); then a villain (for maintaining a relationship with my ex-husband); then I got angry and talked to her, and now I see that she very carefully controls what she takes in of this world. If it hurts, she doesn't look.
I am trying my best not to turn into my mother.
Posted by iris2 on September 15, 2004, at 10:18:37
In reply to Mothers » iris2, posted by partlycloudy on September 15, 2004, at 10:08:27
Lately I find myself more and more like my Mother. I do not like what I see.
Mothers are difficult creatures. I do not think it is unusual to have great expectations. I guess I need to grow up. I know my father was always perfect to me. That contributed a lot to my illness. Probably mostly to the bulimia and perfectionism. I still have problems surrounding him. I can get so hurt by him. I must say in the last few years he has starting being careful what he says to me because he finally not only realized what a dramatic affect his opinions have on me but actually cared.
Well maybe he cared before but he is so tunnel visioned I do not think he could ever conceptualise that I could not change my reactions to him before.
irene
Posted by Dr. Bob on September 15, 2004, at 21:25:12
In reply to Re: OK, I'll start. » partlycloudy, posted by iris2 on September 14, 2004, at 13:35:37
> > I'd love to know the title - I'm open to any helpful suggestions!
>
> The title is: "The Power of Full Engagement"I'd just like to plug the double double quotes feature at this site:
http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/faq.html#amazon
The first time anyone refers to a book without using this option, I post this to try to make sure he or she at least knows about it. It's just an option, though, and doesn't *have* to be used. If people *choose* not to use it, I'd be interested why not, but I'd like that redirected to Psycho-Babble Administration:
http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/admin/20020918/msgs/7717.html
Thanks!
Bob
Posted by iris2 on September 16, 2004, at 12:52:45
In reply to Re: double double quotes » iris2, posted by Dr. Bob on September 15, 2004, at 21:25:12
Dr Bob,
Actually I did check this double quotes thing out. To be honest IS just did not understand it. I get you use double quote like "****" but I do not understand the whys?
Irene
Posted by Dr. Bob on September 17, 2004, at 9:21:38
In reply to Re: double double quotes » Dr. Bob, posted by iris2 on September 16, 2004, at 12:52:45
> Actually I did check this double quotes thing out. To be honest IS just did not understand it. I get you use double quote like "****" but I do not understand the whys?
Thanks for checking it out, sorry it's not more clear. I don't understand what you don't understand, though, what do you mean by the whys? Why it helps to have the title link to Amazon?
Bob
Posted by iris2 on September 17, 2004, at 9:54:42
In reply to Re: double double quotes » iris2, posted by Dr. Bob on September 17, 2004, at 9:21:38
Thank you for taking the time to answer. I have read about the double quotes a few times now and I think I do have a fair understanding. If I use the double quotes then it becomes a link to Amazon.com specifically to the book I am posting about.
Irene
Posted by Dr. Bob on September 18, 2004, at 0:41:20
In reply to Re: double double quotes » Dr. Bob, posted by iris2 on September 17, 2004, at 9:54:42
This is the end of the thread.
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