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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 24 of 24. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by partlycloudy on September 8, 2004, at 5:48:16
Very low and anxious. Cancelling appointments today, wish I didn't have to go to work. Alienated, no friends, family don't give a darn, tired of feeling like garbage. If I ever wanted to run away, I would do it today, but I don't know where I would go. Feel selfish and sullen, like a misbehaving child. Don't like this at all, want to get out of this skin.
I don't like me, can I trade this brain in for a new one?
Posted by crazychickuk on September 8, 2004, at 6:18:04
In reply to Hurricane rebound depression?, posted by partlycloudy on September 8, 2004, at 5:48:16
aww bless you, wish i knew what to say, and sometimes i want to trade my brain in too would be nice wouldnt it?
anyways ((((HUGS))))
Posted by Emme on September 8, 2004, at 6:32:58
In reply to Hurricane rebound depression?, posted by partlycloudy on September 8, 2004, at 5:48:16
(((PC))) Sorry you're feeling so bad. Who was it that said you should be renamed Partlysunny? I think they're right. We like you.
And you're entitled to a sulky day. We try so hard and sometimes life just hurts and the depression seems huge. That's not misbehaving or being selfish. I hope that tomorrow will be better. I'd trade you my brain, but I don't think mine's working very well.
> Very low and anxious. Cancelling appointments today, wish I didn't have to go to work. Alienated, no friends, family don't give a darn, tired of feeling like garbage. If I ever wanted to run away, I would do it today, but I don't know where I would go. Feel selfish and sullen, like a misbehaving child. Don't like this at all, want to get out of this skin.
> I don't like me, can I trade this brain in for a new one?
>
Posted by partlycloudy on September 8, 2004, at 7:01:51
In reply to Hurricane rebound depression?, posted by partlycloudy on September 8, 2004, at 5:48:16
How is it that I have been getting better consistently over the last year and now I feel like I am right back where I started. Full of doubts, fears, second guessing myself. Definitely NOT deputy material, I should not even consider anything that responsible while I'm so deep in this muck. I'm supposed to see my T this afternoon and I don't even want to see her. I'm so disappointed in myself. Can't stick with anything I start. Not exercise, not abstinence from alcohol, not writing a journal, not doing a hobby. My only specialty is how to stay put on a sofa for hours on end, but I haven't seen that job advertised anywhere. I can take setbacks but this feels like a complete reversal, or I've made a circuit and now I'm back where I started. That's impossible, isn't it? Haven't I gone through all these revelations this last year? Been on countless medication changes and found the "perfect" mix. Fed up with having to take pills to feel remotely normal. Fed up with a body that can't decide if it's menopausal or not, with migraine headaches so severe and frequent I can't get the prescription refilled as quickly as I need it. So completely fed up. Where was that rock I crawled out from? I want it back now.
Posted by antigua on September 8, 2004, at 7:38:17
In reply to More whining, posted by partlycloudy on September 8, 2004, at 7:01:51
Well, I'd loan you my mind, but it's in the midst of shifting gears all the time and might not be much help.
I'm always surprised when I get hit with what you're dealing w/right now. I mean, haven't I already dealt with this junk over and over again? I've made HUGE progress this year, but I can sink back into that hole very quickly. I've discovered, though, that it usually doesn't last too long. I rebound quicker now, but I sink lower too.
Sometimes it seems like it will never be over and then something wonderful happens.
Any sunshine yet?
antigua
Posted by partlycloudy on September 8, 2004, at 8:08:30
In reply to Re: More whining, posted by antigua on September 8, 2004, at 7:38:17
And another thing. Why isn't my state back to normal yet? The hurricane is already gone and I still can't buy gasoline, groceries, or shop in a drugstore. (I have absolutely no patience, did I mention that?) Not to mention I had to get out all the manuals to reset the time on all the stupid appliances that have clocks. Harrumph.
Posted by gardenergirl on September 8, 2004, at 10:51:11
In reply to Re: More whining » antigua, posted by partlycloudy on September 8, 2004, at 8:08:30
Oh my, PC. You are really having a bad day. I'm so sorry. It's gloomy here. Of course nothing like a hurricane, but it's the remnants of Frances finally hitting the midwest and bringing rain. I love not having to water, but I hate gray days. I think that's why I slept late today. (But in my case, sleep right now is GOOOOOODDDDD).
I'm sorry your state has been through so much. What a pain in the tuckus to have to deal with the aftermath. Even the little things are a pain. You know, maybe today is a good day to wallow...Sometimes that helps me to not deny feeling depressed, and just indulge myself for a day or two in it. Maybe it's like burning it out faster if you wallow.
(((((((((((PC))))))))))))))
Do what feels best for you. You are a dear and wonderful person. Whether you decide to be a deputy or not, you are a valuable contributor to Babble.
Warmly,
gg
Posted by Miss Honeychurch on September 8, 2004, at 11:41:43
In reply to More whining, posted by partlycloudy on September 8, 2004, at 7:01:51
Partly,
I'm in the same boat. I have been relapsing now into anxiety and depression since that job interview last week. I can't make it go away. No matter how much I repeat that my self worth is not based on achievements, it does not work. I am not using my CBT skills well. I have a tight chest and can't sleep. My husband keeps asking why I'm so sad. I had come so far ina year, and now I'm having a setback.
I want a new brain too. I want a brain that will love me no matter how much of a loser I am.
I'm scared to see my T tomorrow because I am still in the same state when we met last week. I know he must be disappointed even though he says he isn't.
I called in sick today just to sit on the couch and eat ice cream sandwiches. You are not alone!
Posted by partlycloudy on September 8, 2004, at 12:14:56
In reply to Re: More whining » partlycloudy, posted by Miss Honeychurch on September 8, 2004, at 11:41:43
I see my T this evening and I'm afraid to tell her about how I feel.
Posted by justyourlaugh on September 8, 2004, at 12:37:27
In reply to More whining, posted by partlycloudy on September 8, 2004, at 7:01:51
i should have read this post before i emailed you
i was so self involved i didnt see your pain
i am not giving you back your rock though,
i am using it.
how about a cosy quilt?
j
Posted by partlycloudy on September 8, 2004, at 12:42:27
In reply to partly cloudy, posted by justyourlaugh on September 8, 2004, at 12:37:27
A quilt - now that I can wrap myself up in like a mummy. Hard to turn pages in a book, but I'd find a way.
thanks, jyl...
Posted by Charm on September 8, 2004, at 12:51:25
In reply to Re: More whining » Miss Honeychurch, posted by partlycloudy on September 8, 2004, at 12:14:56
Hi PC -
I'm sorry to butt in. I just wanted to tell you that I really hope you feel better soon. I read so many of your posts and its wonderful how you well you participate and help others.
I'm in Georgia, and here we didn't suffer near as badly as you folks in Florida. We lost our power, the schools in our county closed (they are still closed today) and there was a lot of fallen tree damage, but you guys are much worse off.
I also just wanted to share with you that you really shouldn't worry about what you will tell your therapist. The therapist is there to help you...not for you to worry about how the therapist will react. If that were the case, the therapist should be paying you!
Smiles! Charm
PS - The couch is also my favorite place in the house. It's big, puffy, comfy and I'd live on it if I didn't have to be at the office all week!
Posted by partlycloudy on September 8, 2004, at 13:17:27
In reply to Re: More whining, posted by Charm on September 8, 2004, at 12:51:25
Posted by AuntieMel on September 8, 2004, at 13:48:32
In reply to Hurricane rebound depression?, posted by partlycloudy on September 8, 2004, at 5:48:16
Well, if you're missing frances, there's always ivan (still hoping he comes my way!)
As for why you are feeling much lower than you have been? Two words: Barometric pressure. I'm not kidding, sudden ups and downs in pressure can affect mood. At least it does for me.
You can always come to Houston if you need to get away. It's not paradise, but it's different.
Mel
Posted by gardenergirl on September 8, 2004, at 13:59:50
In reply to Re: partly cloudy » justyourlaugh, posted by partlycloudy on September 8, 2004, at 12:42:27
> A quilt - now that I can wrap myself up in like a mummy. Hard to turn pages in a book, but I'd find a way.
> thanks, jyl...How about sticking some chewing gum to your nose...?
:)
gg
Posted by partlycloudy on September 8, 2004, at 14:02:36
In reply to Re: Hurricane rebound depression? » partlycloudy, posted by AuntieMel on September 8, 2004, at 13:48:32
When I lived in Toronto, I could tell the approaching weather by the severity of my migraines. Now it's how well I tolerate the rest of the world.
The weird thing is, EVERYBODY here is touchy today, like leftover cabin fever.
I've never been to Houston except to catch a connecting flight.
Posted by partlycloudy on September 8, 2004, at 14:11:43
In reply to Re: partly cloudy, posted by gardenergirl on September 8, 2004, at 13:59:50
You are always so sensible!!
Posted by TexasChic on September 8, 2004, at 22:49:55
In reply to Hurricane rebound depression?, posted by partlycloudy on September 8, 2004, at 5:48:16
Girl, I hear ya. I'm in the same place. I'm also a fellow couch potato. I think Mel's explanation makes alot of sense. Why else would 'everyone' be in a crappy mood? I'm trying really hard to remind myself that only 'I' can change my situation. If I don't like the way my life is going, then I need to take charge and 'do something'. Of course that takes effort and I don't feel like it.
Posted by partlycloudy on September 9, 2004, at 4:50:05
In reply to Re: Hurricane rebound depression?, posted by TexasChic on September 8, 2004, at 22:49:55
Hi, TC. I asked my therapist if everyone she had seen lately was worse than usual, and she said that EVERYONE had to talk about the weather. Also, I stopped taking my hormone replacement therapy over the weekend because it has caused me so many migraines. She said the emotional rollercoaster just from doing that would contribute to my depression. So I'm riding this wave out.
Posted by AuntieMel on September 9, 2004, at 11:18:13
In reply to Re: Hurricane rebound depression? » AuntieMel, posted by partlycloudy on September 8, 2004, at 14:02:36
It was a joke when I said 'there's always ivan.' I'm really hoping it comes my way.
If you feel the need to evacuate far away, I wasn't kidding about coming here. I've got plenty of room.
Posted by partlycloudy on September 9, 2004, at 12:14:41
In reply to Re: I was only kidding » partlycloudy, posted by AuntieMel on September 9, 2004, at 11:18:13
Wouldn't that be a hoot??
Posted by AuntieMel on September 9, 2004, at 23:38:18
In reply to My husband IS threatening to jump on a plane.... » AuntieMel, posted by partlycloudy on September 9, 2004, at 12:14:41
When should I meet you at the airport?
Posted by AuntieMel on September 12, 2004, at 12:19:35
In reply to My husband IS threatening to jump on a plane.... » AuntieMel, posted by partlycloudy on September 9, 2004, at 12:14:41
Posted by partlycloudy on September 12, 2004, at 19:34:05
In reply to Re:Looks like you dodged the bullet (nm) » partlycloudy, posted by AuntieMel on September 12, 2004, at 12:19:35
This is the end of the thread.
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