Psycho-Babble Social Thread 307772

Shown: posts 1 to 25 of 27. This is the beginning of the thread.

 

depression wardrobe - a superficial thread

Posted by Medusa on January 31, 2004, at 14:41:05

One, what do you wear when you're really down?

Two, what's your comfort-wear, and is it the same thing you put on to fight the downward spiral?

Three, what's missing from your wardrobe? What pieces would give you the ideal ammunition for most situations?


I have one pair of jeans, Levi 515s bought at an outlet, with an irregularity I love on the left leg. When I've laid them out the night before, I can feel almost happy to get up and shower so I can put them on. Unfortunately I restrict them mostly to Sunday wear, although this week has been such h-e-double-hockey-sticks I wore them on Thursday, albeit with boots I love, a smart top and a scarf. (Good lord, call the Stepford-Wife-Rescue-Brigade, someone!)

I find housecoats and polarfleece pullovers comforting. I don't yet have a polarfleece bathrobe, which I would wear over my clothing.

Missing pieces: I need a real winter coat to replace the ill-fitting hand-me-down sack I've been wearing as an overcoat. I have the fabric and lining and a friend is sending me a pattern, and once I've traced it off and made necessary modifications, I should be able to make it up fairly quickly, and then I'll feel less like reject-material in many situations.

Since I owe a salute to the perfect-therapy-patients-club, I'll mention again that my therapist seems to find great comfort in moleskin jeans. (Or, that's her every-other-Tuesday-wear, or her o-god-Medusa-is-coming-today-attire.) I tend to dress a bit for appointments, but not so much for her (or the video or the observing team) as for any acquaintances I might meet on the train or in the station or who knows. Plus, it's an appointment that can serve as a dry run for any new combination I want to try.


Ah, thank mercy tomorrow's Sunday. Time to lay out my jeans and a shapely cotton jersey top.

 

Re: depression wardrobe - a superficial thread » Medusa

Posted by Susan J on January 31, 2004, at 15:52:12

In reply to depression wardrobe - a superficial thread, posted by Medusa on January 31, 2004, at 14:41:05

>>One, what do you wear when you're really down?
<<J Lo type sweat suit. Very comfy and better looking than raggy gym sweats. I almost look human...


>>Two, what's your comfort-wear, and is it the same thing you put on to fight the downward spiral?
<< Same as above. When I'm really down I don't get out of the house much....If I *have* to work, I switch from skirt-suits to dress slacks to avoid panty hose..

>>Three, what's missing from your wardrobe? What pieces would give you the ideal ammunition for most situations?
<<Well, I just got a bright royal blue winter coat that rocks. Makes me at least look upbeat when I'm feeling like crap. Can't wear it inside...but I find that putting color near my face is an easy to way to stop looking dead....

:-)

 

Re: depression wardrobe - a superficial thread

Posted by gardenergirl on January 31, 2004, at 16:30:08

In reply to depression wardrobe - a superficial thread, posted by Medusa on January 31, 2004, at 14:41:05

> One, what do you wear when you're really down?

Usually sweats, or whatever I've slept in as I don't tend to get dressed when I am really depressed.
>
> Two, what's your comfort-wear, and is it the same thing you put on to fight the downward spiral?

Still sweats, but I at least change from my pj's. And the first thing I do when I get home is take off my bra. Now that's comfort!
>
> Three, what's missing from your wardrobe? What pieces would give you the ideal ammunition for most situations?

Hmmm, can't ever get enough cashmere sweaters. Perhaps a camel colored or maybe even green cashmere twin set? But then my colleague tells me I need to sex up the dressing, I'm too conservative. She's threatening to take me shopping.

gg

 

Re: depression wardrobe - a superficial thread

Posted by Poet on January 31, 2004, at 16:34:31

In reply to depression wardrobe - a superficial thread, posted by Medusa on January 31, 2004, at 14:41:05

> One, what do you wear when you're really down?

A soft cotton teal sweater that I'm told makes my green eyes prettier than Scarlett O'Hara's.


> Two, what's your comfort-wear, and is it the same thing you put on to fight the downward spiral?

My cowboy pajamas, unless I'm leaving the house then it's definitely the sweater.

> Three, what's missing from your wardrobe? What pieces would give you the ideal ammunition for most situations?

The only thing teal I have is that sweater, I need more comfort color clothes for other seasons. Teal isn't a color I'd normally buy, but enough people tell me I look good in it. Hmm, the problem must be that I don't think I look good in it (or much of anything for that matter, oh dear.)

Poet

 

Re: depression wardrobe - a superficial thread » Medusa

Posted by Emme on January 31, 2004, at 18:23:38

In reply to depression wardrobe - a superficial thread, posted by Medusa on January 31, 2004, at 14:41:05

> One, what do you wear when you're really down?

My powder blue oversized polartec pullover.

> Two, what's your comfort-wear, and is it the same thing you put on to fight the downward spiral?

My powder blue oversized polartec pullover. (I end up having to wash it often.)

> Three, what's missing from your wardrobe? What pieces would give you the ideal ammunition for most situations?

A nice funnel-neck polartec pullover.

I do actually wear stuff on my legs too. Mostly jeans or.....polartec pants. I wouldn't mind a flowing all-purpose black skirt so I can look presentable when I need to.

 

Re: depression wardrobe - a superficial thread

Posted by Karen_kay on January 31, 2004, at 18:44:04

In reply to depression wardrobe - a superficial thread, posted by Medusa on January 31, 2004, at 14:41:05

> One, what do you wear when you're really down?

**OK, so I'm completely opposite everyone else! When I'm down or anxious (which happens more frequently since I've found a medication that works) I change my clothes easily six or seven times a day. Usually my close friends can tell when I'm at my lowest point by how "fancied" up I am. (I actually wear a nice dress and high heels to cook red beans and rice for dinner sometimes if I'm extremely anxious. I prefer to think I'm cute.) If my hair is curled, or styled to perfection, or I'm wearing dress slacks and a tailored shirt to sit around the house and cook dinner, they know I'm depressed. That's my mask. It's my way of hiding the fact that something's wrong. I'm strange, aren't I??


> Two, what's your comfort-wear, and is it the same thing you put on to fight the downward spiral?

**Honestly, I'd have to say my comfort wear is my perfume. I wear perfume everyday, even if I don't intend to go anywhere. Just smelling myself helps to kinda cheer me up a little. Also, I don't have a comfort outfit. I don't even own a T-shirt or anything fleece. I have a shirt that says " I love rock stars" but I would drop dead if my therapist ever saw me wearing it.


> Three, what's missing from your wardrobe? What pieces would give you the ideal ammunition for most situations?

**I need more cardigans, cashmere preferably. Also, I would love to have a few more nice tailored suits, even though I don't have an occasion to wear them. If I had a butt and some hips, I wouldn't mind a smart skirt. And a couple more cocktail dresses, for sipping martinis would be nice :)


**BTW, I LOVE a superficial thread!!!! Thanks for starting one. I could talk about myself for hours on end, but it appears that noone listens (does that mean there's something wrong with me? Oh, Lord no!) :( My old man got sick of that long ago.... But, he still stares at my nails when I get them done. Yup, he's a work in progress :)

 

Re: depression wardrobe - a superficial thread » Karen_kay

Posted by gabbix2 on January 31, 2004, at 18:58:39

In reply to Re: depression wardrobe - a superficial thread, posted by Karen_kay on January 31, 2004, at 18:44:04

I'm exactly the same way right down to not owning a T-Shirt! The only thing different is that I don't ever worry about my nails.
My friends used to know I was having an exceptionally bad day if I had my matte red lipstick on and gin and Sin-atra hair when I had nowhere to go.

 

Re: depression wardrobe - a superficial thread

Posted by DaisyM on January 31, 2004, at 19:35:17

In reply to Re: depression wardrobe - a superficial thread, posted by Karen_kay on January 31, 2004, at 18:44:04

> One, what do you wear when you're really down?

My red silk suit. Or my black and red dress and really high red pumps. I dress power when I feel down. Or I go buy something new. Especially shoes.


> Two, what's your comfort-wear, and is it the same thing you put on to fight the downward spiral?
Hard to answer. Comfort when I get home are my pink sweats (my husband hates them, threatens to burn them)and no bra. But, downward spiral means dressing up. My staff almost died when I wore jeans to work, it is so unusual.

> Three, what's missing from your wardrobe? What pieces would give you the ideal ammunition for most situations?
I don't have many trendy casual clothes. But most situations for me demand power suits with cashmere turtle necks - and I've got those!

I need a nice pair of knee-high black boots with a decent heel, however...

 

Re: depression wardrobe - a superficial thread » DaisyM

Posted by gardenergirl on January 31, 2004, at 20:58:54

In reply to Re: depression wardrobe - a superficial thread, posted by DaisyM on January 31, 2004, at 19:35:17

Careful Daisy, it might look like you are ready to "wade through the muck!" That's exactly the kind of boots I was wearing that seemed to intrigue Bear.

gg

 

Re: depression wardrobe - a superficial thread » Medusa

Posted by fayeroe on January 31, 2004, at 21:08:07

In reply to depression wardrobe - a superficial thread, posted by Medusa on January 31, 2004, at 14:41:05

> One, what do you wear when you're really down?

flannel pants with pockets and elastic waist or sweats~~~~
>
> Two, what's your comfort-wear, and is it the same thing you put on to fight the downward spiral?

no bra, really soft undershirt, thin grey sweats that i've had too many years~
>
> Three, what's missing from your wardrobe? What pieces would give you the ideal ammunition for most situations?

a really nice and warm coat that i could look warm and stylish in.....i'm very petite, so it has to be cut just so~
>
>iI have one pair of Levis that I favor with a white or black tee....very chic for Oklahoma!
>
>
> I find housecoats and polarfleece pullovers comforting. I don't yet have a polarfleece bathrobe, which I would wear over my clothing.

I love fleece and really dont' have anything in it. I MUST UPDATE!
>
>

 

Re: depression wardrobe - a superficial thread

Posted by Dinah on January 31, 2004, at 21:19:48

In reply to depression wardrobe - a superficial thread, posted by Medusa on January 31, 2004, at 14:41:05

> One, what do you wear when you're really down?
>
cotton, preferably my thin very very soft cotton pj's. They are a joy to have next to my skin. I also wear them when I'm really up, or anywhere in between. I honestly hate leaving the house at least in part because I have to change out of them and put on a *gasp* bra. I have four pairs in different colors and they are my main incentive to do laundry on a regular basis.

If I must go out, I have several identical J Jill soft soft cotton turtlenecks that are my winter uniform. I need to find the summer equivilant.

(Are you guys picking up that I always buy several of what I like in different colors?)

> Two, what's your comfort-wear, and is it the same thing you put on to fight the downward spiral?
>
See above

> Three, what's missing from your wardrobe? What pieces would give you the ideal ammunition for most situations?
>
Well, I've got some but they don't fit anymore. :( I adore Karen Alexander dresses. They were just right for my (old) body type. Tall and long waisted. And the skirts were always those circle skirts that swish so sensuously against your legs as you walk. But I don't think she makes them in my current size. So come to think of it, I don't need anything in my wardrobe. I need my body back to its old size.

 

Re: depression wardrobe - a superficial thread

Posted by pegasus on January 31, 2004, at 21:34:19

In reply to depression wardrobe - a superficial thread, posted by Medusa on January 31, 2004, at 14:41:05

My friends can always tell when I'm depressed because I start wearing the same thing for several days in a row. I just can't be bothered to change once I find something that seems to work. Fortunately, I usually pick something that's fairly versatile.

My comfort clothes are my flannel night shirt that my mome made for me. I'm not sure if I really like the night shirt so much, or if it's my mom I want (probably both).

I really need a good black cardigan, and some decent loafers. I know I sound like a librarian, but that's my disguise at work.

-p

 

Re: depression wardrobe - a superficial thread » pegasus

Posted by fallsfall on January 31, 2004, at 21:43:17

In reply to Re: depression wardrobe - a superficial thread, posted by pegasus on January 31, 2004, at 21:34:19

I AM a librarian. I have loafers, but my cardigan is grey.

When I'm depressed (all the time...) I wear either a velour shirt, or a fleece top with a zipper down the front. Or a long sleeve T shirt that one of my kid's gave me that make me feel like they are hugging me all day. No bra, except when I go to work (thank goodness it is only 10 hours a week).

Recently found my favorite elastic waist jeans on sale for $10. Now I have 3 (but one is falling apart).

What do I need? To never have to go shopping.

P.S. I have a long dark green velour dress with long sleeves that I wear around Xmas time. I don't even have to bring my rabbit's foot with me - there is "soft" everywhere.

 

shoes » DaisyM

Posted by Medusa on February 1, 2004, at 4:35:12

In reply to Re: depression wardrobe - a superficial thread, posted by DaisyM on January 31, 2004, at 19:35:17

> Especially shoes.
<snip>
> I need a nice pair of knee-high black boots with a decent heel, however...
>

I think the shoes and boots topic deserves its own thread. Sigh ... I need enabling in this area, since I'm a relatively green shoe convert, so any sources you care to share will further the cause. >;]

I have a pair of just-below-the-knee patent leather boots with a really low heel. I'd prefer just a little more heel, an additional centimeter maybe, but I guess the conservative shape balances the flashy material. These are such spirit-boosters, and starting to wear them was a huge risk for me. (Handling peoples' reactions has been, um, something new for me to work on.)

I'm not a glam type at all, maybe a 3-4 out of 10, but I've reached the point where I feel, to heck with that, I'm going to try what I want. I've made peace with suits, but on my terms - they have to feel like pajamas, and preferably be lined in wild-patterned silk.

 

Gabbi.... Hmm..

Posted by Karen_kay on February 1, 2004, at 7:32:11

In reply to Re: depression wardrobe - a superficial thread » Karen_kay, posted by gabbix2 on January 31, 2004, at 18:58:39

I had to start getting my nails done because I chew them until they bleed. And everyone knows that no matter how much time and effort you put into making yourself up, if your nails are bleeding all that time has been wasted...

 

Re: depression wardrobe - a superficial thread » DaisyM

Posted by Karen_kay on February 1, 2004, at 7:33:56

In reply to Re: depression wardrobe - a superficial thread, posted by DaisyM on January 31, 2004, at 19:35:17

Diasy,
I have a pair of knee high black boots you can borrow. However, I wear a size 10. I'm tall and have big feet... :(

 

Re: depression wardrobe - a superficial thread

Posted by socialdeviantjeff on February 1, 2004, at 14:43:58

In reply to depression wardrobe - a superficial thread, posted by Medusa on January 31, 2004, at 14:41:05

My depression wear is one of two things:

whatever is on the floor and doesn't reek too bad. Not going out anyway.

Or, the above covered by a black oversized long cut trench coat. Good for the public shock value too :) (no, not that ;))

What's missing? A leather one.

 

Re: depression wardrobe - a superficial thread

Posted by Sabina on February 1, 2004, at 15:18:24

In reply to depression wardrobe - a superficial thread, posted by Medusa on January 31, 2004, at 14:41:05

>> One, what do you wear when you're really down?

if things are really bad and i need to *feel* like i look better quick, i'm more likely to "wear" lipstick and perfume (or essential oils) than change my clothes. like susan said, putting some color up around your face "is an easy way to stop looking dead." scent can be such a powerful mood booster, too. some of my favorites are bergamot, cardamom, and amber.

>> Two, what's your comfort-wear, and is it the same thing you put on to fight the downward spiral?

my domestic comfort uniform lately has been a long sleeve cotton or fleece shirt, and sweat pants. this uniform doubles as my "jammies" and at 3:50 this sunday afternoon, i am still wearing them. i'm not depressed today, but i'm really crampy, so i deserved it. i do plan to *dress* for the superbowl. <snort>

>> Three, what's missing from your wardrobe?

i honestly don't have anything *nice* to wear, but it's my own fault because i have a mental block about wearing or buying really dressy clothes and i'm not sure why. it's a little embarrassing to talk about, actually. whenever i try on suits or cocktail dresses, i feel like i look ridiculous, out of place, and just plain wrong.

i don't feel comfortable in them, so i don't buy them. i'm more than relieved to put back on my quirky, often paint covered togs and hightail it outta the store. i used to buy the dressy, "not me" clothes only to end up not wearing them; but i don't even work outside the house anymore so that notion is wasteful and ludicrous.

even though i'm an attractive woman, i have grown accustomed to myself only when i look sufficiently odd. i dote on it. i had a skeletal disorder as a child and have striven to sabotage my looks a bit ever since, whether through dying my hair totally unnatural colors in my younger days to dressing like a kooky little woman today. i manage to "clean up" pretty nice...only i don't *want* to clean up for some reason.

thank you for making me think about this, medusa; and dang it, now i have to think about this for awhile!

 

Re: depression wardrobe - a superficial thread

Posted by noa on February 1, 2004, at 15:35:13

In reply to Re: depression wardrobe - a superficial thread, posted by Sabina on February 1, 2004, at 15:18:24

I'll have to say PJs or some other not-fit-for-outside-the-house ensemble.

In true form, it would be PJs worn a bit too long, ie, several days in a row without changing or bathing. Sorry--yucky image, but I'm sure you guys understand.

Or, conversely, it's the clothing worn home from work that I was too exhausted to change out of so I wore to bed and am wearing the following day, and and the next, etc., until I absolutely must shower and change to go to work, etc. etc.

 

Re: depression wardrobe - a superficial thread

Posted by Elle2021 on February 1, 2004, at 23:02:33

In reply to Re: depression wardrobe - a superficial thread, posted by noa on February 1, 2004, at 15:35:13

> > In true form, it would be PJs worn a bit too long, ie, several days in a row without changing or bathing.

I'm with you Noa. When I get depressed I'm lucky to even wash my face once a day.

As for the questions:

1. Pajamas (or sweats, whatever I slept in).

2. If I must go out then I wears jeans and a sweater with a coat over it so no one can see my unmatching clothes...

3. I really need more shoes. I realized today that I don't have enough dress clothes.

Elle

 

Re: depression wardrobe - a superficial thread

Posted by DaisyM on February 2, 2004, at 15:14:11

In reply to Re: depression wardrobe - a superficial thread, posted by Elle2021 on February 1, 2004, at 23:02:33

Thanks for the offer of the boots Karen, but wear a size 6 `1/2 so won't work. I'm kinda short: 5'3" with small feet (my best feature, except maybe my eyes which are REALLY dark green).

*sigh* Guess I'll have to keep shopping. Gee, I hate that.

Best place for shoes: Nordstroms winter sale, Macy's in February (for boots) or the Gilroy outlets (in Cal). I shopped at an awesome mall in DC too when I was there but don't know the name. Would like to go to Chicago specifically for shoe shopping.

Oh, I've got a problem, I know...

 

Re: depression wardrobe - a superficial thread » fallsfall

Posted by pegasus on February 2, 2004, at 17:50:05

In reply to Re: depression wardrobe - a superficial thread » pegasus, posted by fallsfall on January 31, 2004, at 21:43:17

Sorry! Didn't mean to imply anything negative about librarians. I love the library, and would love to be a librarian myself. And, as I said, I dress in classic librarian style at work, by my own choice. But I guess I must fear that others find it boring.

-p

 

Re: depression wardrobe - a superficial thread

Posted by holymama on February 3, 2004, at 11:56:47

In reply to depression wardrobe - a superficial thread, posted by Medusa on January 31, 2004, at 14:41:05

> One, what do you wear when you're really down?
>
Anything baggy to hide mtself.

> Two, what's your comfort-wear, and is it the same thing you put on to fight the downward spiral?

I also lose the bra first thing, and often change out of anything tight in exchange for my ripped, paint splattered cotton PJ pants. Oooh so attractive.
>
> Three, what's missing from your wardrobe? What pieces would give you the ideal ammunition for most situations?

More black. I love black. It makes me feel intriguing, mysterious... Also, one more pair of tight sexy levis like the ones I have on right now would be nice. I can only get away with wearing these once or twice a week.
>
>
>

 

Re: depression wardrobe - a superficial thread

Posted by syringachalet on February 5, 2004, at 9:48:38

In reply to Re: depression wardrobe - a superficial thread, posted by Sabina on February 1, 2004, at 15:18:24

I havent written here in a long time. My physical health and mental grayness has made me want to avoid dealing with just about anyone..I hate going to the drive in at Mickey Ds because I might run into another idiot who sees my wheelchair and somehow equates my physical limitations to my IQ.
Most days I just wear sweats but the jacket has to be one with a hood so i dont get cold. I do make myself bath every other day to maintain my skin intergrity. Brush the teeth almost everyday with electric tooth brush that has a strap so I dont drop the brush 1000 times becaue of my MS.
The last visit(med check only) I had with my lady shrink I was having a very painful day..humidity and cold kill me. She asked what I thought I could do 'to help myself'. I asked her if she had every been in such physcial pain at sometime in her life(even one day)that the thought of death seemed comforting because the pain would end, and her clueless reply was , Are you feeling suicidal today? She must have worked at McDickey Ds through med school. No, I am NOT sucidial, I am in pain and you are soooooooooo clueless(I thought to myself)

I have a warm coat and burette that I wear when I have to go out and dont do it anymore than abolsutely necessary.

 

Re: depression wardrobe - a superficial thread » syringachalet

Posted by Ilene on February 5, 2004, at 15:16:25

In reply to Re: depression wardrobe - a superficial thread, posted by syringachalet on February 5, 2004, at 9:48:38

> I havent written here in a long time. My physical health and mental grayness has made me want to avoid dealing with just about anyone..I hate going to the drive in at Mickey Ds because I might run into another idiot who sees my wheelchair and somehow equates my physical limitations to my IQ.
> Most days I just wear sweats but the jacket has to be one with a hood so i dont get cold. I do make myself bath every other day to maintain my skin intergrity. Brush the teeth almost everyday with electric tooth brush that has a strap so I dont drop the brush 1000 times becaue of my MS.
> The last visit(med check only) I had with my lady shrink I was having a very painful day..humidity and cold kill me. She asked what I thought I could do 'to help myself'. I asked her if she had every been in such physcial pain at sometime in her life(even one day)that the thought of death seemed comforting because the pain would end, and her clueless reply was , Are you feeling suicidal today? She must have worked at McDickey Ds through med school. No, I am NOT sucidial, I am in pain and you are soooooooooo clueless(I thought to myself)
>
> I have a warm coat and burette that I wear when I have to go out and dont do it anymore than abolsutely necessary.
>

I bathe and get dressed most days. Force of habit, I think, because I don't like to go places either. My comfort wear is either pajamas or a pair of velour pants and oversize shirt w/ cowl neck.

How well does your pdoc know you? She doesn't sound incredibly idiotic from the perspective of a person who doesn't know you. If she *does* know you, then she sounds like an idiot.

Were you depressed before you were diagnosed w/ MS?

Ilene


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