![[dr. bob]](/dr-bob-sm.gif)
Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 25 of 32. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by Eddie Sylvano on April 18, 2003, at 11:02:05
Has there ever been a poll on the gender ratio here on PB? It doesn't seem that there are as many men as women, with the meds boards being the slight exception. That's just me.
Posted by Oddipus Rex on April 18, 2003, at 11:19:20
In reply to Gender distribution of PB, posted by Eddie Sylvano on April 18, 2003, at 11:02:05
> Has there ever been a poll on the gender ratio here on PB? It doesn't seem that there are as many men as women, with the meds boards being the slight exception. That's just me.
http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/stats/20030411.htmlLooks like you're right :) Wonder if PB is about the same as other mental health boards? And if thaere's a difference between general health boards and mental health boards?
Posted by ayuda on April 18, 2003, at 11:55:02
In reply to Re: Gender distribution of PB » Eddie Sylvano, posted by Oddipus Rex on April 18, 2003, at 11:19:20
> > Has there ever been a poll on the gender ratio here on PB? It doesn't seem that there are as many men as women, with the meds boards being the slight exception. That's just me.
>
>
> http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/stats/20030411.html
>
> Looks like you're right :) Wonder if PB is about the same as other mental health boards? And if thaere's a difference between general health boards and mental health boards?
>I would think that women are *traditionally* more open to discussing their problems, even with "strangers," and we are more likely to "reach out" for support than men, and that's why there are so many more women here. Because internet use in general (and I don't know the exact statistics but I know I've seen this discussed somewhere on the 'net) has many more men than women.
Thanks for the link to the PB stats, too. I found it interesting that the most populous states have the most registered users here (CA, IL, NY, TX, PA -- all are in the top 5 in population in the US, also). I am from PA, but I live in FL now, and so I find it kind of funny that FL is among the top states for posters to this site! My perception before moving here, and certainly since, is that all the crazies tend to be attracted to this state!!! Myself among them, I guess!
Posted by Eddie Sylvano on April 18, 2003, at 12:18:17
In reply to Re: Gender distribution of PB » Oddipus Rex, posted by ayuda on April 18, 2003, at 11:55:02
I am from PA, but I live in FL now, and so I find it kind of funny that FL is among the top states for posters to this site! My perception before moving here, and certainly since, is that all the crazies tend to be attracted to this state!!! Myself among them, I guess!
-------------------I'm one of the Florida crazies, too. Let's hear it for "America's wang"!
Maybe it's the heat...
Posted by mmcasey on April 18, 2003, at 13:58:05
In reply to Gender distribution of PB, posted by Eddie Sylvano on April 18, 2003, at 11:02:05
I've actually been wondering also what the age distribution of PB looks like. I am 24 and a woman. I feel like most people are in their 30s or 40s, but I'm not too sure. Anyone know anything about that??
Posted by ayuda on April 18, 2003, at 14:34:40
In reply to And ages???, posted by mmcasey on April 18, 2003, at 13:58:05
> I've actually been wondering also what the age distribution of PB looks like. I am 24 and a woman. I feel like most people are in their 30s or 40s, but I'm not too sure. Anyone know anything about that??
Yes, those stats also showed that, among respondants who gave an age/birthday, the average birth-year is 1966 and the average age is 38 (which doesn't match up for some reason). Seeing as how I was born in 1965 and am 38, I guess I'm pretty average here.
Posted by ayuda on April 18, 2003, at 14:40:28
In reply to Re: Gender distribution of PB » ayuda, posted by Eddie Sylvano on April 18, 2003, at 12:18:17
> I'm one of the Florida crazies, too. Let's hear it for "America's wang"!
> Maybe it's the heat...
>
>What part of the state are you in? I am in Havana ... I mean, Miami.
I told my mom that when I see the national news and someone has done something completely stupid, just idiotic, that usually causes them more harm than others, I just ask myself, what part of Florida did that happen in, because I know it didn't happen anywhere else! And 90% of the time, I'm right!
Posted by Eddie Sylvano on April 18, 2003, at 15:02:22
In reply to Re: America's loony bin » Eddie Sylvano, posted by ayuda on April 18, 2003, at 14:40:28
> What part of the state are you in? I am in Havana ... I mean, Miami.
------------------heh. I'm in the miniscule administrative brain of the state here in Tallahassee. Not a world-class city, but it's easy to get around.
> I told my mom that when I see the national news and someone has done something completely stupid, just idiotic, that usually causes them more harm than others, I just ask myself, what part of Florida did that happen in, because I know it didn't happen anywhere else! And 90% of the time, I'm right!
---------------Truly an odd lot of people spinning out their lives on this swampy sandbar. They should change the motto to "The sinkhole state." But hey, at least there's no state income tax.
Posted by ayuda on April 18, 2003, at 15:54:03
In reply to Re: America's loony bin » ayuda, posted by Eddie Sylvano on April 18, 2003, at 15:02:22
>I'm in the miniscule administrative brain of the state here in Tallahassee. Not a world-class city, but it's easy to get around.
>Two thoughts on the panhandle:
1) I have a friend from home who is in Destin, and he said that area's called "LA" for "Lower Alabama." I believe that Miami should NOT have any administrative offices, state or federal. That way all the new immigrants would have to come up to Tallahassee and get a taste of the United States before settling down here.2) At least you can get into another state within a short period of time. I'm closer to foreign countries than I am to the next state. I feel isolated from the rest of the civilized world.
> Truly an odd lot of people spinning out their lives on this swampy sandbar. They should change the motto to "The sinkhole state." But hey, at least there's no state income tax.
>There are people I meet here who don't even know that other states have state income taxes. When I say that Florida has no state income tax, they are confused, because they pay income taxes, they think. They don't realize that their taxes are only federal. I have no idea what they teach these people down here about the rest of the country.
Posted by Eddie Sylvano on April 18, 2003, at 16:31:00
In reply to Re: America's loony bin » Eddie Sylvano, posted by ayuda on April 18, 2003, at 15:54:03
> 2) At least you can get into another state within a short period of time. I'm closer to foreign countries than I am to the next state. I feel isolated from the rest of the civilized world.
-------------------Miami truly is the dead-end of America (or the Keys, more so I guess). Nice beaces down there, though.
>I have no idea what they teach these people down here about the rest of the country.
--------------What perplexes me is that despite laws requiring a minimum of insurance for car registration, nobody who's accident prone seems to have any.
I also find it odd how developers here make such large storefront facades. The Eckard where I get my rx is like 50 feet tall from the lot, with 10 foot ceilings inside. For that matter, all the buildings here look weird, and there is no normal vegetation. And too many bugs. that are too big.
Posted by ayuda on April 18, 2003, at 16:47:18
In reply to Re: America's loony bin » ayuda, posted by Eddie Sylvano on April 18, 2003, at 16:31:00
> > 2) At least you can get into another state within a short period of time. I'm closer to foreign countries than I am to the next state. I feel isolated from the rest of the civilized world.
> -------------------
>
> Miami truly is the dead-end of America (or the Keys, more so I guess). Nice beaces down there, though.
>
> >I have no idea what they teach these people down here about the rest of the country.
> --------------
>
> What perplexes me is that despite laws requiring a minimum of insurance for car registration, nobody who's accident prone seems to have any.
> I also find it odd how developers here make such large storefront facades. The Eckard where I get my rx is like 50 feet tall from the lot, with 10 foot ceilings inside. For that matter, all the buildings here look weird, and there is no normal vegetation. And too many bugs. that are too big.
>
>And those of us who aren't accident prone have very high premiums! I just got my renewal from Allstate, $1003 for 6 months! I haven't had an accident since 1981, only one speeding ticket in my life, in 1992. Not exactly high risk. I am switching to another insurance company when this policy expires next month.
Most of the people who are in accidents in Dade, at least from what I understand, are not in registered cars and they don't have driver's licenses, because they are recent immigrants (around here, that means coming to the US within the last 40 years) and duck the system. So their "system" is to screw those of us who are law abiding citizens by driving up our insurance costs.
I think they have beautiful buildings here, though too many of them. We don't have the big bugs in this part of Dade, thank goodness! I've seen them -- something out of sci fi!
I prefer the beaches on the west coast (took me some time to realize that means Tampa, not California). I really love Siesta Key just south of Sarasota. The beaches here are too commercialized and noisy for me.
Do you work for the insurance administration? Wondering from your comment. I used to work for the Maryland Insurance Administration, in health insurance, though.
Posted by fayeroe on April 19, 2003, at 11:58:54
In reply to Re: And ages??? » mmcasey, posted by ayuda on April 18, 2003, at 14:34:40
> > I've actually been wondering also what the age distribution of PB looks like. I am 24 and a woman. I feel like most people are in their 30s or 40s, but I'm not too sure. Anyone know anything about that??
>
> Yes, those stats also showed that, among respondants who gave an age/birthday, the average birth-year is 1966 and the average age is 38 (which doesn't match up for some reason). Seeing as how I was born in 1965 and am 38, I guess I'm pretty average here.AYUDA, I am 59. fayeroe
Posted by ayuda on April 19, 2003, at 12:18:45
In reply to Re: And ages??? » ayuda, posted by fayeroe on April 19, 2003, at 11:58:54
Posted by leeran on April 19, 2003, at 14:40:54
In reply to That makes you above-average! :-D (nm) » fayeroe, posted by ayuda on April 19, 2003, at 12:18:45
Ayuda,
I am a 44 year old female, living in California, grappling* with the fact that I'm six years older than the average poster.
There's that phase in your life when everyone seems older - doctors, airline pilots, teachers, professors, etc. THEN, there's this point when you're not sure if they're older or younger. Of course, the natural progression is that you start realizing that everyone seems to be younger, a situation that's perhaps more pronounced (for me) because of the area where we live - a beach town in Southern California.
I think I have "Peter Pan" syndrome, LOL! But I don't want to hang around with kids - I just want to look younger!
*I'm not really grappling! But I did wince when I read the average age/birth year!
Posted by fayeroe on April 19, 2003, at 14:51:36
In reply to Re: That makes you above-average! :-D » ayuda, posted by leeran on April 19, 2003, at 14:40:54
> Ayuda,
>
> I am a 44 year old female, living in California, grappling* with the fact that I'm six years older than the average poster.
>
> There's that phase in your life when everyone seems older - doctors, airline pilots, teachers, professors, etc. THEN, there's this point when you're not sure if they're older or younger. Of course, the natural progression is that you start realizing that everyone seems to be younger, a situation that's perhaps more pronounced (for me) because of the area where we live - a beach town in Southern California.
>
> I think I have "Peter Pan" syndrome, LOL! But I don't want to hang around with kids - I just want to look younger!
>
>
> *I'm not really grappling! But I did wince when I read the average age/birth year!BUT I don't feel 59, Leeran....And I bet you don't feel your age either. age is just a number. remember how hard it was to maintain? now, we can just progress along and not worry so much about it. i like it....pat
Posted by ayuda on April 19, 2003, at 14:59:25
In reply to Re: That makes you above-average! :-D » ayuda, posted by leeran on April 19, 2003, at 14:40:54
> Ayuda,
>
> I am a 44 year old female, living in California, grappling* with the fact that I'm six years older than the average poster.
>
> There's that phase in your life when everyone seems older - doctors, airline pilots, teachers, professors, etc. THEN, there's this point when you're not sure if they're older or younger. Of course, the natural progression is that you start realizing that everyone seems to be younger, a situation that's perhaps more pronounced (for me) because of the area where we live - a beach town in Southern California.
>
> I think I have "Peter Pan" syndrome, LOL! But I don't want to hang around with kids - I just want to look younger!
>
>
> *I'm not really grappling! But I did wince when I read the average age/birth year!Trust me, compared to a 38th year like mine, you are probably in better shape! I have had so many physical problems lately, I am on percodan all day long while my docs are trying to figure out (very slowly) how to get me through it.
Here are the actual stats (reformated because they were in table form), so you should not feel strange about the "median," because you are far from the oldest!
N Responding 4565
Min year 1917 age 86
Max year 1988 age 15
Avg year 1966 age 38I live in Southern Florida, so I know what you mean about wanting to look younger. My problem is that I do look like I'm about 10 years younger than I am (from what everyone tells me, the shock that they go into when I tell them my age), BUT last year the Effexor REALLY blew my weight out of control, and I am over 200 lbs now, while everyone here is like 18 years old, and 90 lbs. with big, big fake boobs. I go back and forth between, "do I really want to fit in with these people?" and "I don't want to be a misfit!" But I have to play the hand god gave me, I guess.
Posted by Kar on April 19, 2003, at 15:34:11
In reply to Re: That makes you above-average! :-D » ayuda, posted by leeran on April 19, 2003, at 14:40:54
I guess below average is desired in this case, huh? Really really no offense mmcasey, but I find it innnnteresting that a wee 24 year old started this part of the thread...You little..
I'm kidding; I meant to say that it's actually nice to have some younger people here. you can correct us when we use unhip terms. Right on!Karen, 33 in Connecticut (shut up, Wendy- that's where i live now...problem with US too?)...
Oh yeah, and don't call me ma'am. Anyone.
P.S...Lee- lucky to be in CA. I could tell you were on one of the coasts (that's a good thing)...
Posted by ayuda on April 19, 2003, at 15:47:55
In reply to It's just an average- not a median!! » leeran, posted by Kar on April 19, 2003, at 15:34:11
>
> Oh yeah, and don't call me ma'am. Anyone.
>The first time anyone ever called me ma'am I was 18, and I just about knocked her teeth out! Then I moved to South Carolina when I was 27, and everyone uses ma'am and sir all the time, so I got acclimated to it, and started using it, too, though not as often. I can't get used to being called sen~ora, though, here in Miami! (sorry, couldn't get the tilde over the n). Especially because I am technically a sen~orita, just one that's pushing 40.
Posted by leeran on April 19, 2003, at 16:27:37
In reply to Re: That makes you above-average! :-D, posted by fayeroe on April 19, 2003, at 14:51:36
Pat,
The numerical age doesn’t bother me as much as watching "things" fall apart. I'm in early menopause and I've seen such a decrease in some areas (my hearing/my eyesight) and such an increase in others (my weight/my bra size - yes, that subject again, but I have read that it can be one the hallmarks of menopause).
I definitely wouldn't want to go back to being younger from an emotional sense. Not at all. I suppose I agree with you, in some ways I feel younger than 44, and after all, it is just a number. However, I’m definitely not as comfortable with it as you sound. Maybe someday . . .
As an aside, I have never lied about my age. It’s just not something I would ever consider doing. My age is too tied up with what I’ve done in my life and how I got to this particular moment. I’m always fascinated with the notion of hiding one’s age (especially as I get older). I have an acquaintance who is obsessed about keeping her age a secret, to the point that she’s tried to have another driver’s license created for situations where she has to show it as her i.d.
There’s no question that I’ve had my own real issues with aging the last two years but it’s been from a physiological sense, not from a concern with the actual age. I attribute most of this to perimenopause/early menopause. A hormone is a horrible thing to lose . . .
Pat, if by "remember how hard it was to maintain" you mean maintaining appearance/weight and all that, then I suppose I'm still in semi-active battle mode. I used to post on a plastic surgery board and this topic was often broached:
Is it harder to grow older if you’ve always considered yourself attractive OR harder to grow older if you never were particularly fond of your looks and the aging process has just accentuated what you didn’t like in the first place.
I’m in the second group.
I have always had low self-esteem regarding my appearance, but professionally, I felt very successful so I just held the other feelings at bay. I guess “worlds collided” when I started perimenopause/menopause. My weight went on a hormonal heyday, I left my job of seventeen years, remarried, moved to California, and one day looked in the mirror and realized I didn’t even feel good about myself professionally anymore. After doing the same work for seventeen years I had really “become my job.” People used to laugh about the fact that my initials were, coincidentally, the same as the publication I worked for.
I have had plastic surgery and I feel a lot better about myself physically. Better than I have in years. Now, do I like admitting that plastic surgery helped my self-esteem? Not really, but it did - so I can't really lie to others (or myself) where this is concerned.
Should I have been more positive about my internal self in order to accept my external self? Yes, probably, but a lot of this started in childhood and now, as an adult, the money for therapy went toward my physical self and now I'm trolling around the internet trying to fix the rest of what's broken (this part is tongue in cheek I hope you know!).
Oh these message board postings . . . they do sound so self-absorbed (the ones I pen, not anyone else’s!). I really need to just write them and save them to my hard drive, but there's something about this "box" that invites the soul to perform an agonizingly slow striptease.
In a rather odd way, fixing what was broken on the exterior has given me a little more courage to look at what needs tending to on the interior. TA DA. I had a moment of self-realization (or rationalization?) so I feel ready to tackle the day.
If anyone actually had the patience to get to the bottom of this drivel known as my post, I would be curious to hear how others feel about aging/appearance and its effect (if any) on emotional well-being.
Lee
Posted by noa on April 20, 2003, at 1:49:57
In reply to It's just an average- not a median!! » leeran, posted by Kar on April 19, 2003, at 15:34:11
Kar, LOL. You reminded me that when I was around 29 I noticed that people starting calling me "ma'am". It really through me off!
Now I'm in my mid forties and hell, I deserve to be called ma'am".
I still have to remind myself sometimes that some people are younger or even WAY younger than me because they might be in some kind of position of power or just present themselves in a very "grown up" way. Then other times, it doesn't seem so incongrous.
Posted by noa on April 20, 2003, at 1:53:55
In reply to Re: Age/appearance (long self-involved) » fayeroe, posted by leeran on April 19, 2003, at 16:27:37
Well, for me it also involves losing the chance to have a child.
Even adoptions sometimes have age limits.
Posted by lil' jimi on April 20, 2003, at 3:08:53
In reply to Re: hormones » leeran, posted by noa on April 20, 2003, at 1:53:55
> Well, for me it also involves losing the chance to have a child.
>
> Even adoptions sometimes have age limits.hi noa,
both of my sisters, my wife's sister and several close family women friends are no longer potential mothers.
as i'm a maried father of an excellent 4 year-old, how can we best be supportive of them?
~ jim
Posted by lil' jimi on April 20, 2003, at 5:33:29
In reply to Re: Age/appearance (long self-involved) » fayeroe, posted by leeran on April 19, 2003, at 16:27:37
> Pat,
>
> The numerical age doesn’t bother me as much as watching "things" fall apart. I'm in early menopause and I've seen such a decrease in some areas (my hearing/my eyesight) and such an increase in others (my weight/my bra size - yes, that subject again, but I have read that it can be one the hallmarks of menopause).
>
> I definitely wouldn't want to go back to being younger from an emotional sense. Not at all. I suppose I agree with you, in some ways I feel younger than 44, and after all, it is just a number. However, I’m definitely not as comfortable with it as you sound. Maybe someday . . .
>
> As an aside, I have never lied about my age. It’s just not something I would ever consider doing. My age is too tied up with what I’ve done in my life and how I got to this particular moment. I’m always fascinated with the notion of hiding one’s age (especially as I get older). I have an acquaintance who is obsessed about keeping her age a secret, to the point that she’s tried to have another driver’s license created for situations where she has to show it as her i.d.
>
> There’s no question that I’ve had my own real issues with aging the last two years but it’s been from a physiological sense, not from a concern with the actual age. I attribute most of this to perimenopause/early menopause. A hormone is a horrible thing to lose . . .
>
> Pat, if by "remember how hard it was to maintain" you mean maintaining appearance/weight and all that, then I suppose I'm still in semi-active battle mode. I used to post on a plastic surgery board and this topic was often broached:
>
> Is it harder to grow older if you’ve always considered yourself attractive OR harder to grow older if you never were particularly fond of your looks and the aging process has just accentuated what you didn’t like in the first place.
>
> I’m in the second group.
>
> I have always had low self-esteem regarding my appearance, but professionally, I felt very successful so I just held the other feelings at bay. I guess “worlds collided” when I started perimenopause/menopause. My weight went on a hormonal heyday, I left my job of seventeen years, remarried, moved to California, and one day looked in the mirror and realized I didn’t even feel good about myself professionally anymore. After doing the same work for seventeen years I had really “become my job.” People used to laugh about the fact that my initials were, coincidentally, the same as the publication I worked for.
>
> I have had plastic surgery and I feel a lot better about myself physically. Better than I have in years. Now, do I like admitting that plastic surgery helped my self-esteem? Not really, but it did - so I can't really lie to others (or myself) where this is concerned.
>
> Should I have been more positive about my internal self in order to accept my external self? Yes, probably, but a lot of this started in childhood and now, as an adult, the money for therapy went toward my physical self and now I'm trolling around the internet trying to fix the rest of what's broken (this part is tongue in cheek I hope you know!).
>
> Oh these message board postings . . . they do sound so self-absorbed (the ones I pen, not anyone else’s!). I really need to just write them and save them to my hard drive, but there's something about this "box" that invites the soul to perform an agonizingly slow striptease.
>
> In a rather odd way, fixing what was broken on the exterior has given me a little more courage to look at what needs tending to on the interior. TA DA. I had a moment of self-realization (or rationalization?) so I feel ready to tackle the day.
>
> If anyone actually had the patience to get to the bottom of this drivel known as my post, I would be curious to hear how others feel about aging/appearance and its effect (if any) on emotional well-being.
>
> Leelee, lee, lee, lee,
lee, lee,
lee,
leeran and fayeroe,
<one's on foot and one's in a little boat? (*!*)>beautifully said lee .... it helped me to read such candor .... thank you .... and our miss patticakes does have a wonderful attitude i can learn from .... but first i want to tell a story for ayuda (does every one know that "ayuda" comes from 'ayudar', spanish for "to help"?)
i loved my father-in-law and i miss him very much .... he was born and grew up in zapapta, texas, on the border south of lerado .... got his degree in agriculture, worked for u.s. aid, raised his family in mexico, central, south america and the carribean .... he was a master of many of the dialects of spanish and all of his children are fluent and another reason we want our son to be bilingual ...
he taught me that i should always address every woman as "sen~orita", if i do not know her, to show respect for her vitality, but really to avoid letting her think i think she was old and, do this, especially for the veijas ...
now my spanish is very poor .... my pronounciation is okay, but my vocabulary is pathetic ... but like many i can understand some spoken spanish ...sometimes .... if spoken slowly ... maybe repeated a few times?
after my mother-in-law died in the spring of '88 we all just sort of went into this fulltime hyper-alert massive mutual-support mode as an alternative to the total panic that we felt from losing the chief organizer, perpetrator, coordinator and sun in our family solar system ..... however christmas loomed like a hurricane nightmare .... we thought we should all go to mexico for the holidays, what the heck? .... it was a thinly-veiled ruse to aviod our grief driven by sheer panic at what berta meant to christmas
so, the whole family, 11 of us including 2 toddlers, in 4 vehicles drove about 3000 miles into mexico and back ....san luis potosi ... guanaguato ... spent new year's in morelia,... passcaro(sp?)
we were heading into the interior and had been driving all night when we stopped at a diner .... the family was at the tables, while dad and i were at the counter ... i was dependent on him for language help ... he was ready to order, the only person working was clearly having to adjust to our increasing her workload ... my sister-in-law asked dad to ask for some milk for the kids ...
"sen~ora! sen~ora!" dad calls gently as he can to the vieja who is very busy.
i give him the kindest elbow to his ribs and say, "sen~ortia!"
in a twinkling she was there in front of me, aglow with an embarrassed blush of modesty, barely able to raise her head enough to meet my gaze, our willing servant.
i could ask for the milk for the babies, but then i introduced her to father-in-law and let him make his amends for his transgression ..... after all, it turned out that she wasn't married. ... .
i loved telling this story on dad ....i love telling you now ... he was a great spirit for me .... we shared an affection i have never known with an adult man ..... we kissed when we greeted each other
now, i'd fear being called "abuelo" , 'grandfather'.
but to get back to lee's post to pat here...... things falling apart .... i do not know about other guys, but i suffer right along with you the experience of the deterioraton of our assets .... and i really think it is more than just vanity for the superfical ..... i think it is existential, too.
i'm 52 .... it's not just that aarp seems to be in my mail everyday ....
it's like i'm melting ..... that beautiful layer of fat just under the skin of the young which makes them so smooth is dissolving, along with some magic youthful musclar tension which was holding things together .... gravity is starting to win battles i never knew i was fighting
plus my receding hairline is trying to give me a mohawk .... but my second colonoscopy wasn't as bad as my first .... i get to be grateful i have no colon cancer and my next colonscopy is 5 years away...
i can not tell anyone how i feel about my stomach or love handles because my compliants are focsed on what is not visible to others..... and beause i am blessed to be thin: 6'2"; 180 , i don't get to complain about this roll around my waist and love handles that are in combat with my belt ..... it is not that i am at all fat .... it is that my muscle tone, which i never had to try to cultivate is now demanding fulltime attention .... i never had to stay in shape before, but now i'm being held hostage by the threat of being out-of-any-shape.....
still i am grateful my situation's not worse and i do feel for the folks who fight their weight becasue i know that it is a physiological and psychological nightmare for them.....
and although i am lucky, that just barely makes it any better to have to endure my face beginning to melt.
all of which is measuring the profundity of the impermanence of all things..... it is not just that all things must pass .... it is that i too am one of the things.
so fayeroe's path of acceptance is where i heading but i have a long way to go.
peace,
~ jim
Posted by fayeroe on April 20, 2003, at 10:27:49
In reply to Re: Age/appearance (involved) » leeran, posted by lil' jimi on April 20, 2003, at 5:33:29
oh my, what a beautiful response to our candid and heartfelt release of our feelings! you de man! now, i have a story. i was standing in line in a grocery store one time, in taos, big tourist town, and there was an older couple in the other line. i looked over and then i looked again! the man's knees had completely sagged down about 4 inches and i could not take my eyes off them........he had on shorts.....i had on jeans.....i could not wait to get home and examine my knees!!!!!! i called friends and demanded why no one told me that eventually my knees were going to end up around my ankles!!:-)
and i'm very thin too, jim. so i know exactly what you mean by the underlying smoothness...where did it go? when i had pneumonia this winter i slept in a fleece leopard print hat...my head would get so cold...one day i walked into the bathroom, unclothed, with my cap on, pulled it off....looked in mirror and screamed. i don't know if it was my buckwheat hair or my wrinkled body!! i laughed so much later and told my friends and we all had such a time with that! they tease me about it still!
happy easter to one and all!! xoxoxo pat
Posted by noa on April 20, 2003, at 11:11:12
In reply to Re: hormones » noa, posted by lil' jimi on April 20, 2003, at 3:08:53
That is an extremely hard question to answer, because I think it is so individual how people feel about it and how they want others to support them. I think one thing never to do is assume you know how they feel about it. Our society tends to do that about a lot of issues!(Duh, Noa, as if I really had to tell him that--we talk about that all the time here, LOL)
I know one thing that is important to me is my relationship with my nieces and nephews.
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