![[dr. bob]](/dr-bob-sm.gif)
Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 6 of 6. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by bookgurl99 on January 26, 2003, at 3:20:47
I explained to a friend a few months ago that I have OCD. I explained how it gets better or worse in relationship to my thyroid disorder, and what I'm like when I'm untreated. (This was because he knew I was on an AD and didn't understand why, having implied that it was a crutch.)
Now, whenever I talk to this guy, he brings up the OCD like it's this HUGE disability. Like it completely negates all of my ABILITY. Like I'll talk about feeling ready to go back to college and he'll say,"But with your OCD, there may never be a right time to go back to school."
What is this all about? I hate this behavior of his. I usually reply by explaining that with treatment, I am not impeded by the OCD other than mild associated anxiety.
This friend of mine knew someone who also had an OCD dx, and I think he compares my behavior to this guy's. The difference is that the other guy was also mildy retarded and literally had a 'benign' tumor in his HEAD. Probably due to his other medical problems, like a TUMOR IN HIS HEAD, SSRI's didn't work for him.
How do I explain that while my problems do affect me, once I'm adequately treated I have a nearly normal life? It just ticks me off that previously, this friend really respected me. And now that I have shared this information with him, he always has to bring it up. It's so annoying.
Does anyone else go through b.s. like this?
Posted by Pfinstegg on January 26, 2003, at 13:20:11
In reply to People who focus on your mental ilness, posted by bookgurl99 on January 26, 2003, at 3:20:47
Yes, the same thing has happened to me. Wanting to be honest with my two closest friends, and also maybe to help destigmatize mental illness, I told them both about the severity of the depression I had last year. But I am a bit sorry that I did that now, as that seems to be what they think about first when we talk on the phone or meet. I'm completely over the depression at present, and get irritated that that's what they seem to think of first. I've told them how important it is to me that they think of me as a person first, whom they've known for a long time, and if they want to think about the depression I had- to think of it as a successfully treated one. Still, it's very annoying!
Pfinstegg
Posted by Phyl on January 26, 2003, at 13:44:53
In reply to Re: People who focus on your mental ilness » bookgurl99, posted by Pfinstegg on January 26, 2003, at 13:20:11
I can definitely relate. I have the sad distinction of having had three members of my immediate family commit suicide. Not one, but three! Talk about a stigma. Most people "understand" one, but three? It has been very difficult for me to deal with this and to help my own children deal with it. It isn't something you can openly discuss and I have always tried to keep it hidden. Even relatives don't understand. We are the "different" cousins. I did tell one of my internists and I felt as though he moved my history to the "unstable" category. If I so much as say I can't sleep, the family history rears its ugly head. He's not sure if my problems are related to my family's history and is always extra cautious. I suppose I can't blame him, but the stigma is always there.
I feel that I am ok but how much more free I would have been without this sad baggage to tote along the way.
Posted by bookgurl99 on January 26, 2003, at 13:49:19
In reply to Re: People who focus on your mental ilness » bookgurl99, posted by Pfinstegg on January 26, 2003, at 13:20:11
Yeah -- I think focusing on this helps me to treat other people with problems as a 'person first.' For example, one of my friends has M.S., and for awhile I was bringing it up a lot in reference to how she's doing. Now I realized that I was being a big shmoe and just let her tell me if something is M.S.-related or not. I mean, _anyone_ can have a bad day regardless of what else is going on in life.
I think I'll use your line of viewing mine as a succesfully treated case on my friend and see what happens.
:D
Posted by bpdzone2000 on January 28, 2003, at 8:22:48
In reply to Re: disabilities, etc. » Pfinstegg, posted by bookgurl99 on January 26, 2003, at 13:49:19
I can totally relate.
I told a close friend about my illness and I think I scared the shit out of her. She just looked at me with wonder and mistrust.
I say mistrust because it exlained some of my actions years ago although it was shaming, I think I lost some trust.
Today I have friends that love me unconditionally. The ones that don't? Well it was a very painful lesson that I'm glad that I learned sooner than later.
Posted by bozeman on January 29, 2003, at 0:08:41
In reply to Re: disabilities, etc., posted by bpdzone2000 on January 28, 2003, at 8:22:48
> I can totally relate.
> I told a close friend about my illness and I think I scared the shit out of her. She just looked at me with wonder and mistrust.
> I say mistrust because it exlained some of my actions years ago although it was shaming, I think I lost some trust.
> Today I have friends that love me unconditionally. The ones that don't? Well it was a very painful lesson that I'm glad that I learned sooner than later.Yes!!! Isn't it just awful that, in this so-called "enlightened" age, that we still (for protection) have to hide ourselves, our illness, our medication, our true nature and fears, and our *names* for heaven's sake, out of fear of this kind of ignorant prejudice?
I've told three people -- my roommate, my boyfriend, and my mother. The people I trust with my life. No one else can be trusted to know, as they could/would just use it against me if the opportunity arose. It isn't that I don't like people, I just know them too well. :-) Sadly, ashamedly, I (ignorantly, uniformedly) used to think like them before it happened to me, so I do know how they think to a large degree.
What they don't know won't hurt them (or me) in this case.
This is the end of the thread.
Psycho-Babble Social | Extras | FAQ
Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.org
Script revised: February 4, 2008
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/cgi-bin/pb/mget.pl
Copyright 2006-17 Robert Hsiung.
Owned and operated by Dr. Bob LLC and not the University of Chicago.