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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 11 of 11. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by Dr. Bob on October 21, 2002, at 1:08:15
> I'm sure tons of books have been written about this, but how did people cope before there were antidepressants? I'm sure there have been suicides since close to the beginning of time, but for all of the medication that is available, more people than ever are taking their own lives. Are we in a sadder state now than ever?
>
> I wonder if anyone knows if the percentage of people with any kind of psychological problems is more now than, say, 50-100 years ago.
>
> I've heard countless people (usually over 60) say that we have it so much easier now than they did. And I'm sure their grandparents told them the same thing, etc., etc. But society seems so much more complicated now than it even did in the 80s when I was a teen/young adult.
>
> Is it just me or are people in general more critical, competitive, self-absorbed, intolerant of others, unfriendly and even ruder, or is it me? Maybe it's always been this way and when I was my younger, better self I was too oblivious to notice or care as much. Is it because so many more people out there (probably including me) have faulty seratonin levels? How long have doctors known about balanced seratonin levels?
>
> I'm feeling depressed because I try so often to (kindly and gently ) reach out to others (when I have the confidence), and get to know them, but most of them are just not interested.
>
> Just felt like venting tonight. :-S
Posted by jyl on October 21, 2002, at 8:26:08
In reply to What people did before antidepressants « WorryGirl, posted by Dr. Bob on October 21, 2002, at 1:08:15
i remember many years ago while in the city(toronto)a student dropped an armful of books while getting off the subway.
the large flow of people diverted around her.
not one person stopped to help her or even glanced her way.some of her books were even kicked far from her.
i bent to help her and heard annoying huffs and sighs from others who thought we were destroying their day because they had to step around us.
how can we fix this world for our childern?
jyl
Posted by Mal on October 21, 2002, at 15:54:24
In reply to What people did before antidepressants « WorryGirl, posted by Dr. Bob on October 21, 2002, at 1:08:15
I think that for most of the world, you are right. People are self absorbed and can hardly spare a smile or help with a door.
I don't mean to rub it in or anything, but I have been fortunate enough to live in places *my* *whole* *life* where a lot of people are friendly and helpful. Your post made me realize I have been lucky.
So if you ever get really tired of it, move to a small town in TN. But the deal is, once you get there, you have to slow down and be polite (as I am sure you always are anyway).
Have a good day... MAL
Posted by WorryGirl on October 21, 2002, at 20:26:15
In reply to Polite Society, posted by Mal on October 21, 2002, at 15:54:24
Hi Mal,
I couldn't believe it when you said you lived in a small town in TN. I used to live in TN; for two years in a small town, and for the other two in Nashville. I'm originally from the northeast.
I found just about everyone in TN very friendly and polite. Course, I was a lot younger then, and I don't know if maybe people tend to be nicer to young adults and teens (or at least more tolerant of them). Who knows? Anyway, my one real friend that I have kept over the years lives in TN.
Now I'm living in a northern suburb of Atlanta. There is definitely more of an aloof attitude here. The people who live in the area we live in tend to be very materialistic and are into one-upmanship.
At the time we bought the house because it was a good deal and seemed like it would be a great place to raise children. In hindsight I would have picked a different part of Atlanta. I'm not and never will be a social snob (lol).
I do believe that good people exist everywhere - it's just getting tougher to find them. Maybe because many of them are in hiding!It's been my observation that people in the suburbs are often snootier than the people who live intown. The suburbans are often more into keeping up with the Joneses and image, and are afraid to do anything that others might not approve of. The intown people seem more open-minded and appreciative and accepting of individuality.
Posted by Mal on October 22, 2002, at 8:30:41
In reply to Re: Polite Society » Mal, posted by WorryGirl on October 21, 2002, at 20:26:15
Worry- we are practically neighbors, especially since the world is getting smaller all the time!
I agree that suburbanites can be a bit too concerned with appearances, but there are nice folks in the 'burbs, too. You're right, Atlanta does feel different.
I have found that, especially where I live, if I go out with a smile then I will get 10 smiles in return, but when I am in a lonely mood, I don't get the same response. I think people read each others' faces very well. But it is hard to radiate sunshine when you feel bad. And sometimes it is nice to be reached out TO rather than being the one doing the reaching. I guess everybody is lonely sometimes.
Maybe things will get better. If your neighbors are into feeling superior, don't let them get to you. You have to live your life being true to your down to earth principles.
You have a great day... MAL
Posted by mair on October 22, 2002, at 12:45:18
In reply to Re: Polite Society » Mal, posted by WorryGirl on October 21, 2002, at 20:26:15
I've lived in small New England towns for most of my life, but I lived near Chicago when I was in college, and I lived in Nashville for 3 years when I was in my 20's. I think it's awfully hard to generalize. Sometimes I think people in the South just seem nicer not because they actually are, but because they have this colloquial way of using words like "hon" or "honey," even with strangers. But I also agree with Mal that my own mental state may have alot to do with how I perceive others. If I'm withdrawn and feeling isolated, it's tons harder to feel a connection to people and at such times I may just see them as being unfriendly or seemingly disapproving.
Mair
Posted by Mal on October 22, 2002, at 13:03:44
In reply to Re: Polite Society -Worrygirl and Mal, posted by mair on October 22, 2002, at 12:45:18
You are right, Mair, I shouldn't generalize because I haven't lived in many places. But I do understand what Worry is saying about neighbors keeping up with the Joneses. THe thing is- that happens in happy little towns too.
Thanks, Mair!
MAL
> I've lived in small New England towns for most of my life, but I lived near Chicago when I was in college, and I lived in Nashville for 3 years when I was in my 20's. I think it's awfully hard to generalize. Sometimes I think people in the South just seem nicer not because they actually are, but because they have this colloquial way of using words like "hon" or "honey," even with strangers. But I also agree with Mal that my own mental state may have alot to do with how I perceive others. If I'm withdrawn and feeling isolated, it's tons harder to feel a connection to people and at such times I may just see them as being unfriendly or seemingly disapproving.
>
> Mair
Posted by Dr. Bob on October 23, 2002, at 18:07:36
In reply to What people did before antidepressants « WorryGirl, posted by Dr. Bob on October 21, 2002, at 1:08:15
Re: What did people do before antidepressants?
Posted by FredPotter on October 22, 2002, at 23:09:21
In reply to http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20021019/msgs/124431.html
> People are supposed to be at their happiest when their social group, nation etc is in a state of open warfare, presumably because all their hatred and aggression is directed outward, and the enemy seems so different from them by comparison that they all feel united. It's a bit embarrassing really
----
Re: What did people do before antidepressants?
Posted by Mr Cushing on October 23, 2002, at 0:23:06
In reply to Re: What did people do before antidepressants?, posted by FredPotter on October 22, 2002, at 23:09:21
LOL... now that's the best one I heard yet. An instant cure for depression/anxiety is to go around causing an international war. Maybe that's why the US is having so many problems recently? Bush has decided that for a cure for his people's depression he's going to go after Iraq, therefore creating a war, and solving his people's mental health problems. lol....Hope that doesn't offend anybody, I just thought it was pretty funny
Posted by Gracie2 on October 23, 2002, at 22:47:59
In reply to Reposted: What people did before antidepressants, posted by Dr. Bob on October 23, 2002, at 18:07:36
I live in the city, in a very old neighborhood that's somewhat bohemian. Most houses here are over 100 years old and rehabbed, private residences. Some are mansions, and some were hacked up into flats and rented out as Section-8 apartments.
The other morning I shuffled out to my car (which was parked on a square of cement that used to house a garage before it burned down), balancing a coffee cup and other stuff. I started to unlock the car door, and then I heard a noise close to me.It startled me, and then I saw a man relieving himself in the corner a few feet away. Being a city dweller, this didn't really alarm me. I just sighed and threw me stuff in the car, but then he zipped and walked over to me. That really got my attention, but I still wasn't frightened. He was somebody that needed watching, though.My husband says that I'm scared of the wrong stuff, and I guess that's true. I was raised in the city. I'm scared of parties, and public meetings, and telemarketers, and meeting the neighbors, and new jobs. But I'm not frightened by the city or the people in it.
Anyway, this man walked up to me and apologized for urinating in front of me. He said he was embarrassed and sorry. Then he walked away without hitting me up for money or anything. It was a refined act in a kind of tough neighborhood,
and I remembered him for it.
Small kindnesses count.
-Gracie
Posted by Alara on October 24, 2002, at 23:43:17
In reply to Reposted: What people did before antidepressants, posted by Dr. Bob on October 23, 2002, at 18:07:36
>
> Hope that doesn't offend anybody, I just thought it was pretty funny
>Mr Cushing, you didn't offend me. There's a strong element of truth in your observation that makes you want to laugh: How silly can we human beings be?? God gave men/women brains??? :-) It's false logic: On one level we understand the value of togetherness in adversity and we try to cure our depression (feelings of learned helplessness) by attacking the enemy. With the resulting empowerment comes mental health. Right?
Enter the pathos: We are perpetuating the cycle of bloodshed and slaughter. One group triumphs over the other in war, empowering themselves but at the same time defeating the `enemy'. And who is the enemy? A group made up not only of `terrorists' but of innocent men, women, and children. And so the cycle continues.
We human beings regard ourselves as intelligent? Now there's the joke. We should watch the dolphins or the sheep and learn from them.
Posted by Alara on October 26, 2002, at 1:38:17
In reply to What people did before antidepressants « WorryGirl, posted by Dr. Bob on October 21, 2002, at 1:08:15
"I'm feeling depressed because I try so often to (kindly and gently ) reach out to others (when I have the confidence), and get to know them, but most of them are just not interested."
This is the plight of the sensitive, caring, and empathic person who finds him/her self thrown into a sometimes harsh and uncaring world. I can really, really relate to this!
Yes, I do think that people, on the whole, have become
ruder, harder and more self-absorbed. There was a report last night on TV about some Australian social scientists who are researching this decline in social grace. The scientists blamed the phenomenon on a decline in parenting standards.You are right about life being more complicated too. Our roles have changed. Women no longer feel adequate as wives, friends and mothers. They must also have a `career' and develop that tough, competetive, ruthless edge. Men no longer feel adequate as the husbands, fathers and breadwinners of this world. They need to treat women as equals in business and life and yet are still expected to treat them with extra sensitivity. Meanwhile society still forbids men to cry.
Meanwhile, we have to worry about the fall of the dot coms, the collapse of consumerism, terrorism and new wars...
No wonder so many people take antidepressants!
This is the end of the thread.
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