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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 7 of 7. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by m3 on October 16, 2002, at 0:42:06
I had just started feeling cheerful about making new friends and moving on from mourning long-term girlfriend's departure...when she came to visit this weekend. It was fun, mixed with a few scary crying conversations about where we're headed and whether I can stand this. Now she's gone again and I'm alone with a cat. I hate this. Whoever thought of love is no friend of mine...On a slightly related subject, I've been ruminating about my particular kind of self-injuring behavior lately. Can anybody recommend some good general reading about SIB, or share some thoughts about how to deal with it/reduce it? I'm still too afraid to talk about it with my therapist.
Speaking of suggestions, I'm also open to hearing nominees for good blues albums to listen to when your baby's far away.
Posted by Phil on October 16, 2002, at 6:33:32
In reply to girlfriend gone, again. also, question about sib., posted by m3 on October 16, 2002, at 0:42:06
Not blues but Harry Nillson's,"You're breaking my heart and tearing it apart so f*ck you." Catchy tune.
Any best of BB KING with The Thrill is Gone on it.
Gary Moore's I've Still Got the Blues for You. Heckuva guitarist, too. Lyrics below.
Gary Moore - Still Got The Blues
Used to be so easy
to give my heart away
But I've found that the hard way
is a price you have to pay
I found that that love
was no friend of mine
I should have known
time after timeSo long, it was so long ago
but I still got the blues for youUsed to be so easy
to fall in love again
I've found that the hard way
it's a way that leads to pain
I've found that love
was more than just a game
to play and to win
but to lose just the sameSo long, it was so long ago
but I still got the blues for youso many years
since I've seen your face
and now in my heart
there's an empty space
where you used to beThough the days come and go
there's one thing I know
I still got the blues for you
Posted by Dinah on October 16, 2002, at 8:42:35
In reply to girlfriend gone, again. also, question about sib., posted by m3 on October 16, 2002, at 0:42:06
Hi M3,
Doesn't seem at all fair does it? But I'm glad you were getting to a good place in your life, and I know you can again.
The best source of information I know on self injury is this website.
http://www.palace.net/~llama/psych/guide.html
And perhaps after reading it, you'll feel more comfortable talking to your therapist. Although I do understand the reluctance. Some mental health professionals are definitely calmer than others about it.
Hope this helps,
Dinah
Posted by m3 on October 16, 2002, at 11:18:27
In reply to Re: girlfriend gone, again. also, question about sib. » m3, posted by Dinah on October 16, 2002, at 8:42:35
Thanks for the blues songs...I had only known Harry Nilsson through the Midnight Cowboy soundtrack. Which I liked, so I'm not sure why I didn't pursue it.Anyway. Reading through the site you (Dinah) suggested was really helpful. I'm not sure I can talk to my shrink about it yet, but I'm definitely feeling the relief of knowing I'm not the only one. Thanks again.
Posted by jyl on October 16, 2002, at 13:25:57
In reply to Re: girlfriend gone, again. also, question about sib. » m3, posted by Dinah on October 16, 2002, at 8:42:35
dinah,
thought i was the only one :(
thankyou for the link.
jyl
Posted by Dinah on October 16, 2002, at 15:52:00
In reply to Re: girlfriend gone, again. also, question about sib., posted by jyl on October 16, 2002, at 13:25:57
> dinah,
> thought i was the only one :(
> thankyou for the link.
> jylNo, unfortunately there are many, myself included. That site is a terrific one.
Dinah
Posted by m3 on October 18, 2002, at 23:33:24
In reply to Re: girlfriend gone, again. also, question about sib. » jyl, posted by Dinah on October 16, 2002, at 15:52:00
So as I mentioned in chat, I did bring up SIB with my therapist. She was unruffled and supportive (perhaps she had already noticed signs). I told her I didn't want to discuss details of the behavior just yet (too much shame) but was interested in looking at causes, such as the "invalidating environment" idea on the llama site. She seemed to be okay with that, and said she would be "interested" if I wanted to discuss details with her more.So I guess it went well, though I'm still sort of freaked out about it. I guess in the strange world of psychotherapy it's a good thing to talk about the things that freak you out, as opposed to the ones that just make you upset.
In other interesting news, she advanced the idea that I might be cyclothymic instead of just plain unipolar depressed. I'm supposed to mention the idea to my new pdoc. I wonder what I should do if I get a new dx. Will I need a new wardrobe? Do I have to notify the DMV?
This is the end of the thread.
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