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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 24 of 24. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by Dinah on July 16, 2002, at 10:27:31
If you enjoy grammar humor as much as my husband and I do, you might enjoy The Lexicon of Intentionally Ambiguous Recommendations by Robert Thornton.
I recommended it to Jane the other day. It features such creative inventions as the quomma.
It has been many years since we have read it, but my husband and I still quote it to each other all the time.
Posted by beardedlady on July 16, 2002, at 10:33:21
In reply to Beardy, I have a book recommendation for you, posted by Dinah on July 16, 2002, at 10:27:31
Posted by Gabbi on July 16, 2002, at 17:03:27
In reply to Beardy, I have a book recommendation for you, posted by Dinah on July 16, 2002, at 10:27:31
Its called anguished english. The author's name is Richard Lederer I've promised to restrain my writing today. But this book is a collection of GENUINE spelling errors and lines which use a similar sounding but not -quite -right words which add an entire different meaning to the sentence.
One of the authors is a teacher so he compiled much of his information from student essays.A couple of examples
my friend drove up in a bright blue vulva.Christopher Columbus circumcised the world in a giant clipper.
I function well as an individual and as a group.A fifth grade student wrote
"I have enjoyed my boyhood so much I am looking forward to adultery".quotes from a Doctors reports(overworked doctors I think)
Patient went to bed feeling well, but woke up dead.
Different Doctor
patient had never been fatally ill before.Well you get the idea.
What I love is that the author is scrupulous about ensuring that these are genuine. Otherwise to me they would be the equivelent of knock-knock jokes.
Posted by susan C on July 16, 2002, at 20:16:57
In reply to book recommendation- Anguished english 1 AND 2, posted by Gabbi on July 16, 2002, at 17:03:27
A police officer pulls over a lady who paused, did not stop, at the stop sign. As he approaches the driver, he recognizes her as his High School English teacher. He says "Hello" and as he is writing the ticket, he says, "I just want you to know that stop sign was a period, not a comma."
Posted by tabitha on July 17, 2002, at 1:45:48
In reply to book recommendation- Anguished english 1 AND 2, posted by Gabbi on July 16, 2002, at 17:03:27
Once I put "anguish" into Google and came across the wonderful world of Anguish Languish. Here's my favorite, and the link to a whole bunch more is at the bottom of the page. I'll give you a hint, it's a song...
Hormone Derange
O gummier hum warder buffer-lore rum
Enter dare enter envelopes ply,
Ware soiled'em assured adage cur-itching ward
An disguise earn it clotty oil die.Harm, hormone derange,
Warder dare enter envelopes ply,
Ware soiled'em assured adage cur-itching ward
An disguise earn it clotty oil die.http://www.justanyone.com/allanguish.html
Posted by Jonathan on July 17, 2002, at 21:53:15
In reply to More Anguish Languish, posted by tabitha on July 17, 2002, at 1:45:48
Thanks Tabitha :)
This made me laugh for the first time in months.
If you can read French, you might also enjoy this collection of about 35 poems - "Mots D'Heures: Gousses, Rames: The D'Antin Manuscript" by Luis D. Antin Van Rooten - http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/0140057307/drbobsvirte00-20/
This is one of my favourites:
Un petit d'un petit s'étonne aux Halles.
Un petit d'un petit: Ah! Degres te fallent!
Indolent qui ne sort cesse,
Indolent qui ne se mène;
Qu'import un petit d'un petit
Tous Gai de Reguennes.You can view a very bad and totally uninformative English translation by clicking the "Translate" button at the top of the page.
Jonathan.
Posted by tabitha on July 18, 2002, at 2:18:07
In reply to ... and Franguish Languish » tabitha, posted by Jonathan on July 17, 2002, at 21:53:15
I have no idea what that says. But, in the translation, I think this part kind of makes sense...
Small of small is astonished with the Markets.
Small of small: Ah! Degrees are necessary for you!
Posted by Jonathan on July 18, 2002, at 7:40:26
In reply to Re: ... and Franguish Languish » Jonathan, posted by tabitha on July 18, 2002, at 2:18:07
Posted by tabitha on July 19, 2002, at 2:00:00
In reply to Read it aloud to a child who doesn't know French (nm) » tabitha, posted by Jonathan on July 18, 2002, at 7:40:26
My french is pretty bad.
Tres clever.
Posted by tabitha on July 19, 2002, at 6:23:16
In reply to Read it aloud to a child who doesn't know French (nm) » tabitha, posted by Jonathan on July 18, 2002, at 7:40:26
Owl Fodder
------------
Owl fodder due wart tin haven,
Hollow wood bathin' I'm.
Die keen dim cup,
Die twill bead on,
Inert acid dissin' heathen.
hint: maybe this belongs on the Faith board.
Posted by Dinah on July 19, 2002, at 8:42:02
In reply to OK, I made this one up... » Jonathan, posted by tabitha on July 19, 2002, at 6:23:16
Yours I got tabitha (and thank you kindly). But could you give me a hint for the other one? Even my brilliant husband couldn't get it.
Posted by tabitha on July 19, 2002, at 15:23:38
In reply to Re: OK, I made this one up... » tabitha, posted by Dinah on July 19, 2002, at 8:42:02
Not sure which you mean, so here are 2 hints. The franguish one is a nursery rhyme about an egg-shaped fellow's misfortunes. The anguish one, well, enter envelopes ply = and the antelopes play.
Posted by Dinah on July 19, 2002, at 15:36:59
In reply to Re: OK, I made this one up..., posted by tabitha on July 19, 2002, at 15:23:38
Takes me a while and a lot of hints sometimes. (grin)
Posted by Jonathan on July 19, 2002, at 17:28:05
In reply to OK, I made this one up... » Jonathan, posted by tabitha on July 19, 2002, at 6:23:16
> Owl Fodder
> ------------
> Owl fodder due wart tin haven,
> Hollow wood bathin' I'm.
> Die keen dim cup,
> Die twill bead on,
> Inert acid dissin' heathen.Gibbons display orderly dread;
Infer gibbons address buzzes
As weaver gibbons' toes hoot
dressed buzzard gains stars.
End leader's knotting totem passion
Buddy liverwurst farm weevil
Far Dinah's ducking
damn' deep our undug low river ...
Posted by Jonathan on July 19, 2002, at 17:29:10
In reply to Re: OK, I made this one up... » tabitha, posted by Jonathan on July 19, 2002, at 17:28:05
Posted by Jonathan on July 19, 2002, at 18:00:02
In reply to Got it. Thanks! :) » tabitha, posted by Dinah on July 19, 2002, at 15:36:59
> Takes me a while and a lot of hints sometimes. (grin)
Your husband's French is probably too good: Amazon.fr don't sell this book.
For anyone who still needs another hint, there's a clue to the poem in the book title "Mots d'heure: Gousses, Rames".
I haven't read it, but apparently there's a German edition of the same book: this link points to the details of the German version - again, try reading the title aloud to a child who doesn't understand German -
http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/0207959498/drbobsvirte00-20/
Goût de lac :)
Jonathan.
Posted by Dinah on July 19, 2002, at 20:08:58
In reply to Well done, Dinah!, posted by Jonathan on July 19, 2002, at 18:00:02
And he has one too. I'm giving the computer over to him to write it.
In Latin:
Civile se ergo
Fortibus es inero
Novile deus trux
Vatis inem causan dux(Am I a lucky gal or what?!)
Posted by Jonathan on July 19, 2002, at 21:39:45
In reply to Re: I got it! (Or my husband did :) ) » Jonathan, posted by Dinah on July 19, 2002, at 20:08:58
I think these are much easier:
Inscription on an ancient Roman column - "Totie hors esto"
and on a large stone jar - "Iti sapis potanda bigone".Jonathan.
Posted by Dinah on July 19, 2002, at 21:59:52
In reply to Difficult, but I solved it in the end :) » Dinah, posted by Jonathan on July 19, 2002, at 21:39:45
Knows Latin too well I guess. :)
(I'm trying to convince him to register as Dinah's husband.)
Posted by tabitha on July 19, 2002, at 23:34:26
In reply to ... Heifer on heifer (nm), posted by Jonathan on July 19, 2002, at 17:29:10
Oh, that is so beautiful. "buddy liverwurst farm weevil"You have real gift for anguish.
Posted by tabitha on July 19, 2002, at 23:37:17
In reply to Re: I got it! (Or my husband did :) ) » Jonathan, posted by Dinah on July 19, 2002, at 20:08:58
Must be the med side effects slowing my brain (right).
Posted by Dinah on July 20, 2002, at 0:16:20
In reply to I need a hint, Dinah..., posted by tabitha on July 19, 2002, at 23:37:17
My husband authorized one hint.
v is pronounced w in latin
(hope i got that right)
Posted by jane d on July 21, 2002, at 17:55:29
In reply to Re: I need a hint, Dinah... » tabitha, posted by Dinah on July 20, 2002, at 0:16:20
Posted by Dinah on July 21, 2002, at 18:17:33
In reply to Dinaaaahhhhhh!!!!!!! (nm) » Dinah, posted by jane d on July 21, 2002, at 17:55:29
Are you requesting another hint?
This is the end of the thread.
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