![[dr. bob]](/dr-bob-sm.gif)
Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 6 to 30 of 30. Go back in thread:
Posted by Dasypodidae on November 20, 2000, at 10:50:31
In reply to Re: Boundaries of Lumptonia, posted by dj on November 20, 2000, at 10:11:34
Excellent idea thanks Dr Bob!!
> > Another alternative would be to start another eGroup...
> >
>
> I vote for making it an e-group...where it can meander along at it's own pace and quantity and leave the other board to go its own non-lumpish way...
Posted by coral on November 20, 2000, at 11:06:56
In reply to Re: Boundaries of Lumptonia, posted by Dr. Bob on November 20, 2000, at 9:10:37
Dear Dr. Hsiung,
Thank you for creating this board. I've found it extremely helpful.
I'd like to comment on the boundaries of Lumptonia, especially as it relates to being a clique. Clique denotes active exclusion which I don't believe has been the case. However, I can easily understand how people would feel "left out" if they weren't involved in the original posts. In re-reading the posts, when an inquiry has been made about Lumptonia, people were quick to respond to bring others (newcomers) up to speed.
Isn't this sense of exclusion true of any thread that has a number of posts? I'm referring not only to PB and PSB, but any BB, and especially so in chat rooms. It's like walking into a party already in full swing and several conversations are going on simultaneously. It does take time to "get into the flow".
One way of avoiding anyone feeling left out would be a separate board for Lumptonia which could include a brief synopsis of its origins and a strong welcoming message to anyone who would like to participate. Someone else argued for re-combining the boards which may also work, because it would reduce the "obviousness" of the Lumptonian references. It would then be just another long thread.
Given the discomfort, hostility, and ugliness of some of the posts in the past few hours, it would be tempting to banish Lumptonia. I sincerely hope you do not take such action. Personally, I would consider another e-group a form of banishment. When I come to PSB and PB, I like the ease of being able to easily switch between the boards.
At its core, Lumptonia represents another aspect of the multi-faceted world of depression. While I'm not arguing the "misery loves company" point of view, there is comfort in knowing that things I do when depressed and which add to the sense of embarrassment and shame of depression, (there should be no embarrassment and shame, I know…), aren't so bizarre. In a very real way, discovering that others also dive for the couch, have a special blanket, wear flannel pajamas throughout the day, etc., have helped me cope with the horrific isolation and withdrawal of depression.
Additionally, I feel humor is one of the most healing elements available to us. Admittedly, Lumptonian humor can be black, but even the tiniest bit of laughter opens up the possibility of renewed vitality.
One final point I'd like to make is that Lumptonia, while not quite an acquired taste, obviously isn't going to appeal to everyone, but should it be expected to do so? The example I'd like to offer concerns the thread on the television show, ER. That show evokes terrible feelings in me. I've spent far too many hours far too many times in the ER with family members to enjoy that show and would not watch it, even under threat of bodily harm. So, when the ER thread popped up, my initial reaction was an involuntary spasm of horror. However, the thread has proven to be a lively and healthy discussion for people other than me. Under no circumstances would I want that thread censored, simply because I had a bad reaction to it.
Of course, maintaining civility and respecting the feelings of others should be maintained for every post. Keeping that in mind, we also always have the freedom to read or not read a post.
Respectfully submitted,
Coral
Posted by shar on November 20, 2000, at 11:13:13
In reply to Re: Boundaries of Lumptonia, posted by dj on November 20, 2000, at 10:11:34
I wonder if there is perception that Lumptonia is 'hogging' the board, because the thread generates a quantity of posts.
Of all 20 threads on this board as I write,
---two carry on the Lumptonia story
---three are indirectly related to Lumptonia.The two Lump story threads are:
---Missing Lumptonia--Emmanuela (turns into Christmas carol thread)
---Labrassador--Coral (main thread, most posts)The three threads containing Lumpotonia related posts are:
---Same Questions and Topics--Dr. Bob
---Dark Night of the Unlumpy--Hannah
---Quick Comment--NikkiT2Now, the volume of the main Lump thread is large. The minor lump thread has fewer posts and turned into a thread on a Christmas carol (first day of Christmas).
So, I guess I don't understand why people feel that PSB is too Lumptonian, or so Lumptonian that people don't want to post on PSB anymore. Or why people don't just zoom right past and ignore the posts, as we have all been advised to do on different occasions when there were threads that we didn't participate in or didn't like.
Anyone can "join" Lumptonia, it is a fun, silly thing, and creative, and lighthearted. The original posts are in the archives, should someone want history or background.
Should Lump stuff be banished to an e-group because the one main Lumpy thread is long, or should the number of posts in any given thread be set to a certain number? Or, should it be banished because people point to the long thread as disruptive (and create more Lump-related threads) and don't want it on PSB at all? BTW, I don't see where the disruption comes in, except as a matter of quantity.
It seems there is more going on here than is warranted by the actual count and contents of PSB threads. I will certainly abide by Dr. Bob's decision, but an e-group doesn't make sense to me (why the strong feelings about wanting it off PSB altogether?), but maybe only posting to one thread would help. Or, maybe it needs to be banned for whatever reason?
Shar
Posted by NikkiT2 on November 20, 2000, at 11:49:58
In reply to Boundaries of Lumptonia -- Two threads too much?, posted by shar on November 20, 2000, at 11:13:13
OK. I apologise.
I simply tried to make a point so that others would not feel as I do. I once felt very much part of this board, and I no longer do. That was my point.
This current page may only contain those two threads, but there is certainly a feeling of.. well, something.I really, really did not mean to offend anyone, and do not want to see anyone / anything banned.
I withdraw... humbly.
Nikki
Posted by Noa on November 20, 2000, at 12:18:08
In reply to Re: Boundaries of Lumptonia, posted by coral on November 20, 2000, at 11:06:56
I am not sure what the best answer is. I was very much a part of the lumptonia thread, and have enjoyed the humor and benefitted from it, as shar and coral have described.
But as it has taken on such an active life of its own, perhaps an egroup isn't such a bad idea.
For me, the lumptonia thing seems to have run most of its course, and I have focused more on other threads lately. While I agree that just skipping the lumptonia thread, as one would skip other threads that weren't of interest to a particular person, is a good strategy, I do wonder if because the lumptonia thread is so voluminous, it can be intimidating to people who are just arriving, and whether its dominance changes the impression of what the board is about in general---not that lumptonia doesn't fit into what this board is about, but just overshadowing the other stuff.
I hope that this is taken in the spirit in which it is intended---I love the lumptonia thing, and the humor has been healing---but sometimes as things grow and develop, it is worth considering how it affects the board as a whole.
Posted by B Day on November 20, 2000, at 12:39:31
In reply to Re: Boundaries of Lumptonia, posted by Dr. Bob on November 20, 2000, at 9:10:37
> > I think alot of it is this lumptonian business. Anyone not "in" on the joke (??) can barely understand the majority of posts in here. And it does make one feel like an outsider. :o(
>
> That's what I was afraid of:
>
> http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20001117/msgs/2940.html
>
> I wonder if a reasonable compromise would be to limit posts about Lumptonia (and Lumptonianisms) to a single thread?
>
> Another alternative would be to start another eGroup...
>
> BobNikki, Dr. Bob and All,
I can see where someone could be left feeling somewhat alienated from board discussions such as the Lumptonia ones. I remember wondering myself at times not long ago if there might be room for me in PB and PSB's talks. Particularly when threads become long they seem to develop a core discussion group that ends up making the majority of posts therein. I guess at times this projects a sense that those folks have little interested in or don't care to pay much attention to others.
I think in the case of the Lumptonian threads, indifference to others and their discussions is both true and not true. It is true in that it has been somewhat addicting for many of those who have participated in it, even to the point where other people and discussions have been ignored in part or in whole at times. It is untrue, I think, in that Lumptonians tend to warmly welcome all who come to their "land" in general whoever they might be. Alienation of others has not been desired or intended.
A thing which concerned me to a degree was not only how the Lumptonian discussion thread dominated the October 31st PSB archive, but also how it spawned Lumpism into other threads on the board to the point where it affected the entire feel, personality and perception of the board and its goings on to many.
I remember wondering to myself what first timers must think of the place. Some of them must have felt they had entered the "Mother Of All Looney Bins" for sure. :-) I don't believe such effects were intentional, simply that there was so much Lumptonian yakking going on that it created a huge, slow-loading web page that to some extent diminished other important things going on here.
Today is the third week anniversary of Lumptonia. Personally, I am amazed by this fact. I couldn't even guess how many hundreds of Lumptonia related posts have been made to date.
Dr. Bob's suggestions for us to consider are good ones. In fact, all constructive comments and suggestions should be welcome. A single thread might be the place to start. Does Lumptonia merit a separate board; I don't know. Would an e-Group alienate Lumptonia; I don't know. I can't envision either of the latter options just yet.
I do think the Lumptonian people very much like being on this board among the others here. I also believe they enjoy and appreciate the other, very important threads going on here and don't wish to distract from them.
Nevertheless, we have distracted from the board's broader nature and I suspect that will continue to some extent if Lumptonia continues to flourish, if the ongoing "Yak-rate" continues to be high and us Lumptonians continue to carry our Lumptonian culture to other discussions.
I suspect we will soon see, perhaps in as little as a week or less, if a Lumptonian relocation of some sort needs to occur. To me, this is an interesting phenomena and dilemma. Yet I think it is a good problem for us to have since it has come as the result of a remarkable degree of light-hearted participation and involvement.
On behalf of the Lumptonian people, let me say that we apologize for any disaffection or distraction we may have caused on the board here. Also, let me say that we appreciate the great patience, tolerance and longsuffering shown us here by Dr. Bob and the other fine citizens of the Psycho Social Babble BBS. Lumptonia has been a much needed blessing for a number of us.
For those unfamiliar with it, Lumptonia is a virtual nation and to a degree, a role playing game that just sort of spontaneously invented itself a few weeks ago. It is made up of folks suffering from all sorts of disorders but who all have one thing in common. At one time or another, to one extent or another they all retreat in depression from their lives, worlds, loved ones and selves. Most of them struggle deeply with their depressions. Many suffer great sadness as well. Immobilized by their conditions, they just turn into "lumps" or "lump persons". Lumptonia is a sanctuary for anyone who relates to being a "lump" at times and it is open to all.
More than anything Lumptonia is collaborative, ongoing sharing and assemblage of humorous perspectives on our conditions whether silly, ludicrous, ridiculous, audacious, outrageous, warped, insane, clever or profound. It is a laugh pill. Laughter has been something both sorely missing from and deeply needed in the lives of the good people of Lumptonia. It has been in itself, its own distraction, but in a way, much more. For me, it has been a healing medicine and a way to begin interacting with people again after much withdrawal.
We Lumptonians have been discussing assembling our history and culture both for ourselves and the curiosity of others as well. The going is slow though since with Lumptonians, discussing doing things is far more highly valued than actually doing stuff. Actually doing stuff is generally eschewed if possible. I suppose just how good at "discussing" Lumptonians are has become increasingly and problematically obvious!
Peace,
Ambassador B of Lumptonia
Posted by Greg on November 20, 2000, at 12:55:24
In reply to Re: Boundaries of Lumptonia -- Two threads too much? » shar, posted by NikkiT2 on November 20, 2000, at 11:49:58
Hey Nik,
What are you apologizing for? You voiced an opinion in a polite and concerned manner. You weren't rude, inconsiderate or profane. You simply wanted to say how you felt. There's nothing wrong with that.
You have nothing to apologize for.
XXOO,
Greg> OK. I apologise.
>
> I simply tried to make a point so that others would not feel as I do. I once felt very much part of this board, and I no longer do. That was my point.
> This current page may only contain those two threads, but there is certainly a feeling of.. well, something.
>
> I really, really did not mean to offend anyone, and do not want to see anyone / anything banned.
>
> I withdraw... humbly.
>
> Nikki
Posted by B Day on November 20, 2000, at 12:58:54
In reply to Re: Why apologize? » NikkiT2, posted by Greg on November 20, 2000, at 12:55:24
> Hey Nik,
>
> What are you apologizing for? You voiced an opinion in a polite and concerned manner. You weren't rude, inconsiderate or profane. You simply wanted to say how you felt. There's nothing wrong with that.
>
> You have nothing to apologize for.
>
> XXOO,
> Greg
>
> > OK. I apologise.
> >
> > I simply tried to make a point so that others would not feel as I do. I once felt very much part of this board, and I no longer do. That was my point.
> > This current page may only contain those two threads, but there is certainly a feeling of.. well, something.
> >
> > I really, really did not mean to offend anyone, and do not want to see anyone / anything banned.
> >
> > I withdraw... humbly.
> >
> > Nikki
Posted by coral on November 20, 2000, at 13:01:41
In reply to Re: Why apologize? I agree with Greg. (np), posted by B Day on November 20, 2000, at 12:58:54
> > Hey Nik,
> >
> > What are you apologizing for? You voiced an opinion in a polite and concerned manner. You weren't rude, inconsiderate or profane. You simply wanted to say how you felt. There's nothing wrong with that.
> >
> > You have nothing to apologize for.
> >
> > XXOO,
> > Greg
> >
> > > OK. I apologise.
> > >
> > > I simply tried to make a point so that others would not feel as I do. I once felt very much part of this board, and I no longer do. That was my point.
> > > This current page may only contain those two threads, but there is certainly a feeling of.. well, something.
> > >
> > > I really, really did not mean to offend anyone, and do not want to see anyone / anything banned.
> > >
> > > I withdraw... humbly.
> > >
> > > Nikki
Posted by stjames on November 20, 2000, at 13:17:55
In reply to Boundaries of Lumptonia -- Two threads too much?, posted by shar on November 20, 2000, at 11:13:13
So, I guess I don't understand why people feel that PSB is too Lumptonian, or so Lumptonian that people don't want to post on PSB anymore. Or why people don't just zoom right past and ignore the posts, as we have all been advised to do on different occasions when there were threads that we didn't participate in or didn't like.
james here....
Here, here. Every post cannot please everyone. I just moved on to other posts because I did not have the time to get into Lumptonian. Some seemed to enjoy it, so that is a good thing. The internet is an active, not passive, experience.
You only have to read what you choose, no one makes you read what does not intrest you, except yourself.james
Posted by Noa on November 20, 2000, at 14:07:05
In reply to Re: Boundaries of Lumptonia, posted by B Day on November 20, 2000, at 12:39:31
BDay,
That was a beautiful description of what Lumptonia is and has meant to people, IMHO.
Well said.> I do think the Lumptonian people very much like being on this board among the others here.
I hope "lumptonians" don't take this discussion to mean that THEY should leave this board!!! That would not sit well with me if having a separate board for the lumptonia posts meant that we would lose the people too!
Posted by shar on November 20, 2000, at 14:19:08
In reply to Re: Boundaries of Lumptonia, posted by Noa on November 20, 2000, at 14:07:05
If Lumptonia becomes an e-group or another board, I think it would take people away from PSB. How long that might last is another question. Perhaps it would die a natural death if people had to choose.
When PB split into two groups, my participation there (PB) decreased significantly. If PSB moves Lumpy threads to another place, I would think participation somewhere would decrease because most people have a finite amount of time.
I think it's a matter of logic and logistics.
Shar
> BDay,
> That was a beautiful description of what Lumptonia is and has meant to people, IMHO.
> Well said.
>
> > I do think the Lumptonian people very much like being on this board among the others here.
>
> I hope "lumptonians" don't take this discussion to mean that THEY should leave this board!!! That would not sit well with me if having a separate board for the lumptonia posts meant that we would lose the people too!
Posted by B Day on November 20, 2000, at 14:31:48
In reply to Re: Boundaries of Lumptonia, posted by Noa on November 20, 2000, at 14:07:05
Thanks Noa,
The Lumptonian experience has been wonderful to me. I would hope that we all can appreciate its finer essences and keep those on the board for a long time.
B
PS: Did I mention that I've particularly enjoyed the opportunity to be uncharacteristically crassy, mashy and at times... just downright trashy over there? I guess it shows, huh? It has been excessively and deliciously tawdry. :?)
------------------------------
> BDay,
> That was a beautiful description of what Lumptonia is and has meant to people, IMHO.
> Well said.
>
> > I do think the Lumptonian people very much like being on this board among the others here.
>
> I hope "lumptonians" don't take this discussion to mean that THEY should leave this board!!! That would not sit well with me if having a separate board for the lumptonia posts meant that we would lose the people too!
Posted by shellie on November 20, 2000, at 19:09:51
In reply to Re: Boundaries of Lumptonia, posted by coral on November 20, 2000, at 11:06:56
< Given the discomfort, hostility, and ugliness of < some of the posts in the past few hours, it would < be tempting to banish Lumptonia. I sincerely hope < you do not take such action. Personally, I would < < consider another e-group a form of banishment. < < When I come to PSB and PB, I like the ease of < < < < < being able to easily switch between the boards.Although a non-participant of Lumptonia, I totally agree with Coral that sending it to another e-group would be a form of banishment. I think that sets a very bad precedent of making a judgement concerning which threads belong on psychosocial babble. Psychobabble is defined for "non-medication issues." Lumptonia is a non-medication issue.
Nikki, I totally respect your right to express your feelings. My guess is that returning to a board on which you were previously very involved and comfortable may just take a bit of time: different people, strange threads, etc. In returning and becoming active, you help determine what the board looks like.
Although I understand at the moment the board may look a bit strange to newcomers, I also believe the Lumptonia issue will resolve itself without any intervention. Several members said they are less interested now; other issues may become more important; the board redefines itself on its own. And, as stated by St. James, everyone is free to skip those posts.
Just registering my vote, shellie
Posted by Lexie on November 20, 2000, at 19:10:54
In reply to May I make a quick comment?, posted by NikkiT2 on November 20, 2000, at 3:23:42
> > What seems to have now happened is that a clique has been formed, that is not welcoming to us "outsiders".
>
> I doubt any of you would want anyone to feel like they could not post here, so just thought I'd mention it.
> Hope I haven't offended anyone.
Nikki
Nikki
I can relate to how you feel. I agree you have nothing to apologize for. I also feel like an "outsider". I have always felt that there have been clique's here. I am not apologizing for offending anyone, I feel like it needed to be said. Lexie
Posted by ksvt on November 20, 2000, at 20:24:20
In reply to Re: May I make a quick comment?, posted by Lexie on November 20, 2000, at 19:10:54
> > >I think this discussion has been a good one. I share some of what Nikki and Lexie said. The lumptonia thread grew very large very quickly so by the time i caught up to it, the sheer volume of posts was overwelming. I have alot of trouble developing a sense of humor about depression so it wasn't a thread I felt I could warm up to anyway, but it did seem that some people whose posts are always very helpful got very preoccupied. That being said, Bob, Shar Shellie et al have made a compelling argument for the importance of this thread to them and James is of course right that we can skip right over this one if we don't like it. I don't believe it should be moved. It would further fracture the Board and will probably fizzle at some point of its own accord. Lumptonians continue. ksvt
What seems to have now happened is that a clique has been formed, that is not welcoming to us "outsiders".
> >
> > I doubt any of you would want anyone to feel like they could not post here, so just thought I'd mention it.
> > Hope I haven't offended anyone.
> Nikki
>
>
> Nikki
> I can relate to how you feel. I agree you have nothing to apologize for. I also feel like an "outsider". I have always felt that there have been clique's here. I am not apologizing for offending anyone, I feel like it needed to be said. Lexie
Posted by Dr. Bob on November 20, 2000, at 22:40:42
In reply to Boundaries of Lumptonia -- Two threads too much?, posted by shar on November 20, 2000, at 11:13:13
> Personally, I would consider another e-group a form of banishment.
Banishment is in the eye of the beholder. I thought of it more as freedom from limitations. :-)
--
> I wonder if there is perception that Lumptonia is 'hogging' the board, because the thread generates a quantity of posts.> I guess I don't understand ... why people don't just zoom right past and ignore the posts
My feeling was, one thread was fine -- even that monster thread! -- but when Lumptonianisms started to spread, they weren't so easy to ignore and started to affect the feel of the board as whole.
> Anyone can "join" Lumptonia, it is a fun, silly thing, and creative, and lighthearted.
"The Lumptonian people" certainly have been welcoming, and the fun and creativity have been remarkable. But others can feel left out even if that's not the intent.
I appreciate how open-minded everyone's been about this. I'd like to try, for now, limiting Lumptonian references and expressions to the "Labrassador" thread. OK?
The eGroup question is up to the Lumps themselves. :-)
Bob
Posted by shar on November 20, 2000, at 22:51:42
In reply to Re: Boundaries of Lumptonia, posted by Dr. Bob on November 20, 2000, at 22:40:42
Nay, I would consider an e-group a form of banishment.
Shar (actual real person)
Posted by NikkiT2 on November 21, 2000, at 5:25:11
In reply to May I make a quick comment?, posted by NikkiT2 on November 20, 2000, at 3:23:42
I have never been the sort of person that can say "excuse me, may I be part of your group please".
I didn't want anyone arguing, I just wanted to raise the point, and make you all aware of how it was coming across.
I apologised, as felt feelings had been hurt, and I very much didn't want that to happen.
Please, lumptonians, I know your land is very special to you, but don't get so defensive... it makes others defensive in turn.
I hope we can all live harmoniously together
Nikki xx
Posted by B Day on November 21, 2000, at 7:08:59
In reply to Lumptonia..., posted by NikkiT2 on November 21, 2000, at 5:25:11
Nikki,
Speaking for myself only, nothing you or anyone else has said regarding this thread or any of the Lumptonian threads have either hurt my feelings or put me on the defensive.
I pay attention to what's said whether pro or con and try to consider it objectively. I think different perspectives on these things are good for us and you telling us that you felt excluded from a group is something we needed to hear.
As I mentioned before, I don't believe it was ever the intention of any involved with the Lumptonian thread to have an exclusive group. We simply didn't realize some felt shut out.
I've said Lumptonia was open to all interested in participating and that is not born out of defensiveness, but out of invitation.
Like I believe Shar said, Lumptonia is an acquired taste and not necessarily for everyone, but for that reason only would it not be for everyone. Otherwise, it is wide open.
I can think of nothing that any Lumptonian would enjoy more than to see the ranks of Lumptonian citizens swell to several million and then have a Lump-in at the U.N.
B
----------------------------
> I have never been the sort of person that can say "excuse me, may I be part of your group please".
>
> I didn't want anyone arguing, I just wanted to raise the point, and make you all aware of how it was coming across.
>
> I apologised, as felt feelings had been hurt, and I very much didn't want that to happen.
>
> Please, lumptonians, I know your land is very special to you, but don't get so defensive... it makes others defensive in turn.
>
> I hope we can all live harmoniously together
>
> Nikki xx
Posted by shar on November 21, 2000, at 10:27:31
In reply to Lumptonia..., posted by NikkiT2 on November 21, 2000, at 5:25:11
> "Please, lumptonians, I know your land is very special to you, but don't get so defensive... it makes others defensive in turn."Watching people (via their posts and not naming any names) bash Lumptonia as clique-ish, unwelcoming, wanting it off the board entirely, wanting it restricted to one thread (and so happy when it happens!), saying it's too overwhelming to others, dismissed as fantasy characters (so it's ok to insult them), etc. -----
Me? Defensive? Why ever would you think that might occur?
And if I did feel defensive, I shouldn't show it, because that might "make" others feel defensive?
Shar
Posted by shar on November 21, 2000, at 13:51:18
In reply to Re: Lumptonia..., posted by shar on November 21, 2000, at 10:27:31
......because that might "make" others feel defensive?
>
-------P.S. If I could "make" others feel a certain way, it would certainly not be defensive, unhappy, hostile, depressed, angry, sad, aggressive, disappointed, nasty, scared, pessimistic, despairing, worthless, etc. I would "make" them feel happy, joyous, welcoming, friendly, secure, lovable, not depressed, clear-headed, self-confident, bouyant, satisfied, content, comfortable, optimistic, etc. But the fact is, I can't do either.
> Shar
Posted by coral on November 21, 2000, at 14:44:03
In reply to Re: Lumptonia..........P.S. How others feel., posted by shar on November 21, 2000, at 13:51:18
> ......because that might "make" others feel defensive?
> >
> -------P.S. If I could "make" others feel a certain way, it would certainly not be defensive, unhappy, hostile, depressed, angry, sad, aggressive, disappointed, nasty, scared, pessimistic, despairing, worthless, etc. I would "make" them feel happy, joyous, welcoming, friendly, secure, lovable, not depressed, clear-headed, self-confident, bouyant, satisfied, content, comfortable, optimistic, etc. But the fact is, I can't do either.
>
> > Shar
Posted by Dasypodidae on November 21, 2000, at 15:28:06
In reply to Re: Lumptonia..........P.S. How others feel., posted by shar on November 21, 2000, at 13:51:18
> >
> -------P.S. If I could "make" others feel a certain way, it would certainly not be defensive, unhappy, hostile, depressed, angry, sad, aggressive, disappointed, nasty, scared, pessimistic, despairing, worthless, etc. I would "make" them feel happy, joyous, welcoming, friendly, secure, lovable, not depressed, clear-headed, self-confident, bouyant, satisfied, content, comfortable, optimistic, etc. But the fact is, I can't do either.
>Me neither, unfortunately:o)
Posted by Dasypodidae on November 21, 2000, at 15:41:53
In reply to Lumptonia..., posted by NikkiT2 on November 21, 2000, at 5:25:11
;o)
> I have never been the sort of person that can say "excuse me, may I be part of your group please".
>
> I didn't want anyone arguing, I just wanted to raise the point, and make you all aware of how it was coming across.
>
> I apologised, as felt feelings had been hurt, and I very much didn't want that to happen.
>
> Please, lumptonians, I know your land is very special to you, but don't get so defensive... it makes others defensive in turn.
>
> I hope we can all live harmoniously together
>
> Nikki xx
This is the end of the thread.
Psycho-Babble Social | Extras | FAQ
Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.org
Script revised: February 4, 2008
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/cgi-bin/pb/mget.pl
Copyright 2006-17 Robert Hsiung.
Owned and operated by Dr. Bob LLC and not the University of Chicago.