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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 4 of 4. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by rnny on February 16, 2010, at 21:30:46
I was only in group therapy for only 3 sessions and developed a HUGE crush on the male therapist group leader. I also get crushes on bosses at work and stuff like that. I get such strong crushes, it would make therapy impossible. I saw a male therapist from afar at the clinic I had been going to and he looked very compassionate and like an excellent therapist because he was very down to earth. From afar I thought his personality would be a good match with mine but I was getting a crush on him just looking at him!
Posted by Dinah on February 17, 2010, at 9:19:05
In reply to I could never see a male therapist, posted by rnny on February 16, 2010, at 21:30:46
With the right therapist, it could possibly be very helpful. Discovering how to be more comfortable with men in authority could benefit your life.
But how on earth do you find the right one? Outside traditional psychoanalysis, therapists seem to have frightening little training in transference. And even in traditional psychoanalysis bad outcomes, and even therapists taking advantage of the situation, are not out of the question.
I see some dynamics in my relationships with men being played out with my therapist. Not crushes so much as trying to please, and possibly some sort of parental transference. I'm also aware of dynamics I have with women that might be useful to work on. I can't say therapy has drastically changed my ways of dealing with men, but it has at least made me more aware of them and able to handle them better. And sometimes even find humor in myself and the situation.
Posted by emmanuel98 on February 17, 2010, at 19:22:46
In reply to Re: I could never see a male therapist » rnny, posted by Dinah on February 17, 2010, at 9:19:05
I was worried about developing a terrible crush when I saw a male T, so I chose one who was much older than me and very, very experienced with transference. The age thing turned out not to matter much. I still got so attached to him, it hurt. But fortunately his boundaries were impeccable and so the therapy went well. It helped me a lot with issues I had around my father.
Posted by rnny on February 17, 2010, at 23:31:12
In reply to Re: I could never see a male therapist, posted by emmanuel98 on February 17, 2010, at 19:22:46
I need a therapist (male or female) with as you say "impecable" boundaries because I tend to consciously or unconsciously try to "make friends" with my therapist. I am there for therapy but could easily turn it into a rap session. I am so fed up with needing therapy but I really do. I have so many scars that are healing there is no way I could do it alone by reading self help books, and groups led by lay people (those with similar problems just getting together but there is no professional present) have never worked for me. I see people saying the most absurd things and no one stopping them.
This is the end of the thread.
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