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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 6 of 6. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by orchid on May 30, 2006, at 22:46:04
Dear Orchid
What do I say to you? Hmmm... What do you want me to say? If I said I liked you, and that I always did, would you feel ok with that? Would that be too much for you to handle?
I know I have let you down many times. When I have been overly critical of you, trying to force my logic onto you, told you you had no right to feel this way, that way etc. I have always thought you should match my expectations - whatever crap that I listened to others who said whatever else some one else told them is good. But I never listened to you. I never asked you what you want - atleast for a long long time. I kept trying to make you better, and kept rejecting what you were trying to tell me - but I am sorry, I didn't really know better at that time. I am sorry for letting you go through the abuse - I didn't know that there was a way I could have protected you. Nor did I think you deserved protection. I thought you deserved all the hurt and punishment and always thought you were a very very bad person. But maybe you are not as bad as I had thoguht, and maybe you didn't deserve any punishment.
I try to forgive you. I always will try - forever. And I hope to take care of you as best as I know. And together we will walk hand by hand.
Hugs to you Orchid.
Posted by orchid on May 30, 2006, at 22:59:01
In reply to Dear Orchid, posted by orchid on May 30, 2006, at 22:46:04
And of course, I forgive you for your transference. I mean, you know practically everyone goes through it. And you just played your part in the process. And what better way to learn all that you have learnt rather than by going through it? It is only bad you got a T who was always too busy to help you through it fully and who could understand what you were going through. But that is not your fault. And you have a right to feel.
But I have to say kudos to you, because you have made such a tremendous effort in working your way out of it without the help of your T. Good job buddy. You always manage to go on. And that deserves lot of appreciation.
Please do not feel guilty about your transference and your husband. What you did, you only had to do to make your marriage stronger. You know you never could have been so open to your husband and never could have learnt to be so emotionally intimate if you hadn't learnt it in your therapy. It is sad though that you learnt it the hard way, but that wasn't your fault.
Posted by llrrrpp on May 31, 2006, at 8:33:16
In reply to Re: Dear Orchid » orchid, posted by orchid on May 30, 2006, at 22:59:01
Posted by Dinah on May 31, 2006, at 9:05:06
In reply to Re: Dear Orchid » orchid, posted by orchid on May 30, 2006, at 22:59:01
I hope you're ready to accept your self forgiveness.
Posted by orchid on May 31, 2006, at 12:36:29
In reply to ((((orchid)))) your voice listens too (nm) » orchid, posted by llrrrpp on May 31, 2006, at 8:33:16
Posted by orchid on May 31, 2006, at 12:37:13
In reply to Orchid, that was lovely, posted by Dinah on May 31, 2006, at 9:05:06
This is the end of the thread.
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