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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 13 of 13. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by milly on March 22, 2006, at 13:37:12
Help what shall I do?
I have only 2 weeks left with my T with whom I have been very 'connected' and for a while now I have been working on a small sculpture based on that connection. Sometimes I work on it or just hold it when I want to internalize that connection
Do I give it to him?
Would he be able to accept it?
It has no great monetary value.
If he won't accept it how would I cope with that!
Is it worth the risk?
If I knew how I could try to share a photo of it with you ( but then again I am so vulnerable about my art at the moment I'm not sure if that would be a good idea)
Help guys, what would you do?
milly
Posted by LadyBug on March 22, 2006, at 14:31:13
In reply to ? gift for T?, posted by milly on March 22, 2006, at 13:37:12
Knowing my T. I think she would except it if it were our last appointment. I might talk to her about it first and see what she says. If it's something you want him to have, then ask him first, discuss it and then you have to go with what you decide together. I know all about the fear of rejection over a gift, I've done that enough times that I don't want to do it again if I can help it.
Good luck with it. It sounds like an awesome idea.
LadyBug
Posted by Daisym on March 22, 2006, at 14:36:23
In reply to Re: ? gift for T? » milly, posted by LadyBug on March 22, 2006, at 14:31:13
I'd give it to him. If he hasn't articulated a specific "no gifts" policy, the likelihood is he will accept it since you made it.
If he can't, I think you keep it as a reminder of your connection, sort of a gift from him back to you. You could even say, "I really want you to have this, but if you can't, I hope it is OK with you that I'll cherish it as a reminder of the time we've spent together." That way, either way you win.
How special that you have this talent. I'm jealous.
Posted by Dinah on March 22, 2006, at 16:29:20
In reply to ? gift for T?, posted by milly on March 22, 2006, at 13:37:12
I think it's a wonderful idea! And generally the rules are a bit less strict at termination.
My style would probably be to ask him first, but Daisy's idea was a good one as well.
Posted by annierose on March 22, 2006, at 18:19:53
In reply to Re: ? gift for T?, posted by Dinah on March 22, 2006, at 16:29:20
I would give it to him too. What a wonderful gift!
Posted by TherapyGirl on March 22, 2006, at 19:01:56
In reply to Re: ? gift for T?, posted by annierose on March 22, 2006, at 18:19:53
It sounds good to me, too. I'll be surprised if he isn't touched.
Posted by JenStar on March 25, 2006, at 21:11:53
In reply to ? gift for T?, posted by milly on March 22, 2006, at 13:37:12
hi Milly,
I would say don't post the photo now...only do it if you feel more secure about it. :)I think it's great that you're making a sculpture! Would it help you if YOU actually kept it, to remind you of him? What if you took it in but just to show it off -- and showed it to him and said you made it out of therapy feelings? maybe he'd say some nice things about it, and then when you regard it later on, you could remember those good feelings you had?
Just some thoughts!
JenStar
Posted by milly on March 26, 2006, at 7:15:10
In reply to Re: ? gift for T? » milly, posted by LadyBug on March 22, 2006, at 14:31:13
> Knowing my T. I think she would except it if it were our last appointment. I might talk to her about it first and see what she says. If it's something you want him to have, then ask him first, discuss it and then you have to go with what you decide together. I know all about the fear of rejection over a gift, I've done that enough times that I don't want to do it again if I can help it.
> Good luck with it. It sounds like an awesome idea.
> LadyBug** thanks ladybug
i'm terrified of being rejected over this but so feel the need to leave a tiny bit of me there just as I would love to take away something but i guess what I take away will be all the internal stuff I've learnt.
I'll let you know if I have the courage to offer it
milly
Posted by milly on March 26, 2006, at 7:18:20
In reply to Re: ? gift for T? » LadyBug, posted by Daisym on March 22, 2006, at 14:36:23
> I'd give it to him. If he hasn't articulated a specific "no gifts" policy, the likelihood is he will accept it since you made it.
>
> If he can't, I think you keep it as a reminder of your connection, sort of a gift from him back to you. You could even say, "I really want you to have this, but if you can't, I hope it is OK with you that I'll cherish it as a reminder of the time we've spent together." That way, either way you win.
>
> How special that you have this talent. I'm jealous.** Thanks daisy, that is a good 'back up ' plan which might reduce the rejection I am so afraid of.
Don't be jealous of me I'm certain that you have many talents of which I could be jealous too and everyone has a creativity somewhere deep within just waiting to be discovered!
milly
Posted by milly on March 26, 2006, at 7:19:38
In reply to Re: ? gift for T?, posted by Dinah on March 22, 2006, at 16:29:20
> I think it's a wonderful idea! And generally the rules are a bit less strict at termination.
>
> My style would probably be to ask him first, but Daisy's idea was a good one as well.** Thanks Dinah I am almost certain I will (but keep daisy's plan in mind if it can't be accepted
milly
Posted by milly on March 26, 2006, at 7:20:17
In reply to Re: ? gift for T?, posted by annierose on March 22, 2006, at 18:19:53
> I would give it to him too. What a wonderful gift!
** thanks annierose for the support
milly
Posted by milly on March 26, 2006, at 10:33:17
In reply to Re: ? gift for T?, posted by TherapyGirl on March 22, 2006, at 19:01:56
> It sounds good to me, too. I'll be surprised if he isn't touched.
** hope so, thanks
milly
Posted by milly on March 26, 2006, at 10:36:54
In reply to Re: ? gift for T? » milly, posted by JenStar on March 25, 2006, at 21:11:53
> hi Milly,
> I would say don't post the photo now...only do it if you feel more secure about it. :)** yep you're right, it isn't the right time for me to do that.
> I think it's great that you're making a sculpture! Would it help you if YOU actually kept it, to remind you of him?
** I have been thinking that too as it is going to be hard to not have it near me anymore but I think I will keep daisy's suggestion in mind that if he doesn't accept it I will think of it as 'given' back to me from him.
>What if you took it in but just to show it off -- and showed it to him and said you made it out of therapy feelings? maybe he'd say some nice things about it, and then when you regard it later on, you could remember those good feelings you had?
>
> Just some thoughts!**Thanks for yor thoughts
milly
This is the end of the thread.
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