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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 16 of 16. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by Pfinstegg on March 21, 2006, at 9:37:49
I wanted to give an update on my EMDR therapy, which I do once a week, in addition to the ongoing analysis. I think it's been really helpful in dealing with early fearful, guilt-ridden parts of me. We access a very painful early feeling-state from those years, and then do either eye movements or an auditory alternating left-right brain stimulus. I think we are first accessing my right hemisphere, where all the pain and dissociated parts seem to be, and then the left hemisphere, which is where the self-soothing and feelings of well-being lie. Through all of this, I'm sort of automatically learning to do self-soothing, comforting things for myself- without realizing it intentionally. I'd really recommend it for anyone with a trauma history- which is all of us, I guess!
It's making the analysis go better, too. I can feel more responsible for my "parts", because I'm getting to know more about them. I act them out with him much less, so more good things are happening there too- good, caring things which my young parts need so badly. Well, that's really all for now, but I do hope other traumatized babblers will keep it in mind as a possible wonderful addition to their regular therapy.
Posted by antigua on March 21, 2006, at 10:13:36
In reply to EMDR update, posted by Pfinstegg on March 21, 2006, at 9:37:49
I found the EMDR was very helpful for letting me understand how I felt during those young years--actually feeling, really, which is quite unusual for me. I run from feeling, I guess (how many times have we been told to "sit with the feeling"). Well, I'd love to, but they scoot away so fast. But that was the best thing about EMDR. It didn't help me w/remembering, but it did help me connect w/the feelings.
Keep up the good work!
antigua
Posted by Pfinstegg on March 21, 2006, at 10:53:10
In reply to Re: EMDR update, posted by antigua on March 21, 2006, at 10:13:36
Thanks, antigua! My experience is just like yours- I can feel the feelings more- how awful they were- but then there is a way out of them, too. I'm not sure I could bear so much pain if I didn't know there are ways out. It's not about new memories too much for me either, just that the memories I have are now conected up to all the feelings. Well, that's exactly what you said!
Posted by TherapyGirl on March 21, 2006, at 12:05:54
In reply to Re: EMDR update » antigua, posted by Pfinstegg on March 21, 2006, at 10:53:10
Thanks to both of you for sharing your experiences. I have thought about doing EMDR and the more information I have, the better. Thanks!
Posted by happyflower on March 21, 2006, at 12:29:37
In reply to Re: EMDR update, posted by TherapyGirl on March 21, 2006, at 12:05:54
EMDR is what got the ball rolling for me and my recovery. It changed my life, really. It was scary for me having my repressed memories appearing, but I needed to remember to accept them and move on and heal my past. EMDR is awesome! My T has been doing it for over 15 years and has wonderful successes with it.
Posted by Pfinstegg on March 21, 2006, at 16:23:25
In reply to Re: EMDR update, posted by happyflower on March 21, 2006, at 12:29:37
That's SO good to hear, happyflower! I hope I'll be able to do as well as you. Did you just do the EMDR a few times, with the rest being psychodynamic psychotherapy, or did you have many EMDR sessions? Were they mostly at the beginning of your therapy? I have separate therapists for each, and am wondering how I should do it to make it the most useful.
Posted by ClearSkies on March 21, 2006, at 16:34:04
In reply to EMDR update, posted by Pfinstegg on March 21, 2006, at 9:37:49
I had a great experience with EMDR. It helped me process some adult traumas that were really tying me down. It was a puzzling process at first, but I am very grateful for the caution my therapist used. I cannot say enough about this treatment - if you are "almost there" with regard to past traumas, this therapy can take you all the way home.
To yourself.CS
Posted by Pfinstegg on March 21, 2006, at 16:40:00
In reply to Re: EMDR update » Pfinstegg, posted by ClearSkies on March 21, 2006, at 16:34:04
How wonderful! The few people who have done it all seem to have had the same great experience that I'm having. And I know what you mean-it seems sort of odd and puzzling, like not too much is happening, but a lot is.
Posted by happyflower on March 21, 2006, at 17:40:58
In reply to Re: EMDR update » happyflower, posted by Pfinstegg on March 21, 2006, at 16:23:25
Hi Pfinstegg,
I did EMDR only once with my T and it was done at about 3rd month seeing him. He used it for some of the sever child abuse that I went through. But I think talking it out about my past also helped as much. Just getting valadation for what I was feeling and what happened to me and how it wasn't my fault. My T does mostly congentive therapy but he is also throws every kind of therapy into the mix. My T specializes in trama, and also works a lot with kids.
If you look in archives around March you can see what happened to me. It was tough, but I got so much out of it, so it was worth it.
I am glad my T does the EMDR, because for me it would be hard to try to learn to trust 2 people.When I look back, I can't believe what I have done in therapy all the twists and turns. I am sooo lucky to get a great T first time around.
I think you asked how can you get the most use out of EMDR. I think to me it sounds like it is doing what it is suppose to do. I think eveyone is different on what works for them.
My T volunteers for a prevent child abuse organization, so he is well aware of what child abuse does. He also was one of the expert therapists who helped CPS in their cases. He has seen some bad stuff and I think that has helped me too.
Posted by Pfinstegg on March 21, 2006, at 19:16:14
In reply to Re: EMDR update » Pfinstegg, posted by happyflower on March 21, 2006, at 17:40:58
It certainly does sound like you got a great one, first time around! I have a wonderful analyst, whom I really trust with everything, and then the EMDR therapist, who is a woman, and also easy to trust. It's sort of like I've got a good new mother and father now- and I've given them permission to talk about whatever they want about me.
I'm a bit slower than you in how fast i am able to progress in my therapy, but I do feel very hopeful and confident about the future with these two wonderful people helping. Thank you for the information- just ONE EMDR session got you started on this wonderful path- that's so impressive!
Posted by fairywings on March 21, 2006, at 20:07:21
In reply to Re: EMDR update, posted by antigua on March 21, 2006, at 10:13:36
Hi Pfinstegg,
Do you do EMDR with your regular analyst?
fw
****************Antigua, I have a question.....
> I found the EMDR was very helpful for letting me understand how I felt during those young years--actually feeling, really, which is quite unusual for me. I run from feeling, I guess (how many times have we been told to "sit with the feeling"). Well, I'd love to, but they scoot away so fast. But that was the best thing about EMDR. It didn't help me w/remembering, but it did help me connect w/the feelings.
> Keep up the good work!
> antiguaThis is something I really have a problem with - I push any feelings I have right under the rug. I didn't think I was a good candidate for EMDR bec. when I think of my childhood, things just race through my head - there's a lot of very jumbled thoughts and a lot of images, and I thought for EMDR you had to be able to "focus" on specific situations in detail, and think through them. So, this isn't true?
fw
Posted by Daisym on March 22, 2006, at 0:09:59
In reply to Re: EMDR update » happyflower, posted by Pfinstegg on March 21, 2006, at 19:16:14
You sound so well and so hopeful. I'm very glad. I think you've put together a great team and you are very dedicated to the work. I know how hard it is to face all this stuff over and over again, I'm glad you've found a way to lessen the pain.
Your post made me wonder what (if you want to share) you find yourself focusing on during sessions now. It sounds like the trauma aspects are being handled in the EMDR and you are more able to self-soothe and are in less parts and pieces...Do you ever wonder if those age states will fully integrate and just become a mood, or a smaller, tender place that continues to exist?
I'm in a really hard place right now, having accessed so much anger. It makes the relationship with my therapist so important and yet so hard. I feel bad for him. I think that is why I'm trying the group. It feels safer to be mad with people I don't care about (at least not yet) than this other person I really need.
Posted by antigua on March 22, 2006, at 9:49:54
In reply to Re: EMDR update, posted by fairywings on March 21, 2006, at 20:07:21
I'd have to say yes and no to your question. Yes I did have to focus on a specific event, like being in the bathtub and what happened there with my father, but the EMDR led me more into the event and it helped me remember the feelings and the sensations.
Another time, it was another event that I did have vague feelings about that the EMDR helped clarify, but it was the feelings that I was able to get a hold of that was more important to me.
You do need to focus clearly and at times you wonder if you're "doing it right", but somehow or other a connection is made. I used the EMDR to touch the feelings I couldn't feel about the events.All that said, I did have to quit EMDR because I got too confused with two Ts. I wish my T had been able to do it, but she's not qualified.
best,
antigua
Posted by fairywings on March 22, 2006, at 16:48:28
In reply to Re: EMDR update**Trigger** » fairywings, posted by antigua on March 22, 2006, at 9:49:54
> I'd have to say yes and no to your question. Yes I did have to focus on a specific event, like being in the bathtub and what happened there with my father, but the EMDR led me more into the event and it helped me remember the feelings and the sensations.
**Thanks antigua. I guess I'll have to ask my T about it, I don't think he does it, but I'd like to be able to deal with the feelings better. I feel like I should by now, but I don't. You know, I feel them right now so intensely, but by the time I have an appt. they're inaccessible. And, so often I have the feelings, but when I try to sit with them, or find the source, my mind just won't "go there", or I don't know how to explain it....I just get images? Does that make sense?
> All that said, I did have to quit EMDR because I got too confused with two Ts. I wish my T had been able to do it, but she's not qualified.**That would be a difficult adjustment. I don't think I could go to 2 T's.
fw
Posted by Pfinstegg on March 28, 2006, at 8:34:41
In reply to Re: EMDR update, posted by fairywings on March 21, 2006, at 20:07:21
No, I have a separate therapist for each. Sorry to be slow to answer you, I was off the boards for a bit. I thought I might not qualify for EMDR, either, as I didn't so much have a few definite traumas as an on-going pattern of neglect and abuse. But when you get a fully trained EMDR therapist, they are well-prepared for almost anything you can present them with. Mine has chosen to deal with the feeling-states of those childhood years, rather than a specific abuse incident. She is really helping so much. As you can see from this thread, quite a few people have found it immensely valuable- each of us in different ways. If you are interested in trying it, do make sure you get a fully trained, experienced person to do it with.
Posted by Pfinstegg on March 28, 2006, at 8:46:47
In reply to Re: EMDR update » Pfinstegg, posted by Daisym on March 22, 2006, at 0:09:59
I know what you are talking about- I was in such a tough place with my analyst, too, a few months ago. I had so much rage, fear and hopelessness that it was very hard for us both. The EMDR has had the effect of bringing much more feeling (sorrow and grief, mainly) into my awareness. Both therapists feel that I am integrating my younger selves much more into one me. I feel that, too. I had a real traumatic transference to my analyst for quite a long time- my younger parts couldn't distinguish between him and my absent mother or abusive father- and those parts were really holding center stage. Now, things have softened quite a bit- I feel I am building a more trusting, loving and hopeful relationship with him- like the one I had before the feelings of the early parts came out- in the beginning part of therapy. I don't know exactly how it is working, but I know the EMDR is playing a very important part.
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