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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 18 of 18. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by fallsfall on December 21, 2005, at 22:31:59
I don't drink. I used to drink a little. But I don't like the taste of wine or beer, and it doesn't take much to make me tipsy. Anyway, I have 3 kids and I figure that I was a bit out of control for the 27 months that I was pregnant, and that was enough out of control for me for a lifetime. So I don't drink.
I worry about some of the posters on this board, and I don't really know how to say anything about it. Probably some of what I feel is because I have my own strong opinions on my own drinking, and probably some of it is because my (ex)husband is an alcoholic, and one of my best friends is also a (recovering!) alcoholic.
But I worry when people on this board say that they are going to make things better by drinking. I worry particularly when people are depressed and try to "fix" things by drinking. Alcohol is a depressant. It makes you more depressed. So I worry about my friends.
I understand that drinking is a coping mechanism, and that there are times when we need to use even not-so-good coping mechanisms. I'm not saying that everybody should never drink. But I guess I just want to make the point that people should be aware that it isn't a completely safe coping mechanism.
I guess I'm also worried that some people might not know that it IS dangerous (particularly for people who are already depressed), and if this board never talks about how it can be dangerous, that people will think that it is harmless. So I want to go on record as saying that I believe that drinking is one of the less positive coping mechanisms.
I'm not directing this post at any person in particular. I just worry about my friends.
I hope this post came out OK...
Posted by muffled on December 21, 2005, at 22:54:58
In reply to alcohol, posted by fallsfall on December 21, 2005, at 22:31:59
I am a recovered alcoholic. To me, I know if I drink I will lose my kids. Alcohol is without a doubt a dangerous drug responsible for a huge number of social problems. I doubt theres a person in this world thats not been touched painfully directly or indirectly by alcohol. So I think most realize (I HOPE!!) the dangers and that its poor coping, esp. on meds.
Thanks for caring falls. I think that was well said.
Thanks.
Muffled
Posted by sleepygirl on December 21, 2005, at 22:57:26
In reply to alcohol, posted by fallsfall on December 21, 2005, at 22:31:59
I think you said it very well. Thanks. :-)
Posted by happyflower on December 21, 2005, at 23:00:57
In reply to Re: alcohol » fallsfall, posted by sleepygirl on December 21, 2005, at 22:57:26
I agree too, alcohol can be deadly. Please don't drink and drive, it can kill loved ones.
Posted by sleepygirl on December 21, 2005, at 23:11:07
In reply to alcohol, posted by fallsfall on December 21, 2005, at 22:31:59
I think I expressed this view recently (using alcohol as a coping mechanism kinda thing), and since I'm an adult child of 2 alcoholics, and this played such a big part in my early traumatizations you'd think I'd know better.
When I'm feeling crappy, part of me goes right back there. It's a good thing I really don't drink (hardly ever), but my current attitude leaves much to be desired.
Posted by Voce on December 21, 2005, at 23:41:44
In reply to Re: alcohol, posted by sleepygirl on December 21, 2005, at 23:11:07
Sorry, falls, I don't want you to worry.
I was just expressing in my above post how much I want the pain to go away and how I wish I could just numb out. The few times I have had too much too drink (it doesn't happen often) I have achieved it.
Unfortunately, the only thing that changes in the morning is that now you have a terrific headache.
Of course, everyon is responsible for their own actions. If you are a parent or responsible for someone else, I feel as though there's no excuse for neglect caused by excess drinking.
There have also been posters who have taken drugs to achieve the same effect, and drugs are even more damaging than alcohol.
Posted by ClearSkies on December 22, 2005, at 6:06:11
In reply to Re: alcohol/Fallsfall, posted by Voce on December 21, 2005, at 23:41:44
> There have also been posters who have taken drugs to achieve the same effect, and drugs are even more damaging than alcohol.
Hmm... I'd have to say that drugs can be equally as damaging as alcohol, but it's a false belief that they are more damaging.
I'm an alcoholic in early remission (as my therapist puts it, which makes me quite happy), and I keep quiet here when I read about alcohol use. Not because I don't want people to realize the dangers of its use, but I don't want my words to be interpreted as preaching.My alcohol use was long term and an inappropriate coping mechanism for dealing with traumas I'd experienced. I was lucky in not doing any permanent damage to myself before I stopped using it. I had become seriously dependent upon it for my daily functioning and it made me feel like dog poop every single day. It also prevented my psych meds from doing their job properly. All those warnings on the pill bottles to "don't take this medication with alcohol"? Well, I wish our doctors and pharmacists would be more assertive in telling us that chronic and heavy use of alcohol will actually keep us from getting better.
Posted by fallsfall on December 22, 2005, at 7:32:20
In reply to Re: alcohol/Fallsfall » Voce, posted by ClearSkies on December 22, 2005, at 6:06:11
What I am most concerned about is the "don't take this medication with alcohol". The meds are ANTI-depressants. Alcohol is a DEPRESSANT.
Drinking while you are depressed (drinking even a little - not necessarily to excess, not while driving etc) is like saying "Cold numbs the pain. I'm in pain because there isn't enough heat in my life. So I'll numb that pain by going into the walk-in freezer at the grocery store."
Now, my coping mechanisms of choice (ice cream and chocolate) are not without their risks - primarily obesity, with its medical and emotional consequences. And there are many times when I "cope" to excess. Many of our coping mechanisms have down sides. My concern with alcohol is that its side effect is that it makes you MORE depressed.
Thanks for listening
Posted by Dinah on December 22, 2005, at 10:24:32
In reply to alcohol, posted by fallsfall on December 21, 2005, at 22:31:59
Daddy, and a good percentage of his family, died of cirrhosis of the liver. I've seen my cousin, despite all he knew of his dad, travel down the same path of addiction both to alchohol and gambling.
Because I'm so very aware of my genetic heritage, and my own tendency to addictive behaviors in general, I've been nearly abstinent all my life.
Yet sometimes I wonder if my fistful of anti-anxiety drugs is all that different. Those can be depressants as well (although I find risperdal especially but also klonopin rather strangely anti-depressing). And I know that my father was, for the most part, far more unhappy and unpleasant to be around after he quit drinking. Obviously he was self medicating. From what I know about him, he probably had significant anxiety as well as depression. I know not everyone responds to alchohol the same. My uncle became teary and morose. And he became more pleasant and less depressed after he quit drinking.
I guess I'm afraid of going down my traditional family path. But sometimes I wonder if drinking in moderation wouldn't be safer and have fewer side effects than Risperdal.
Not to even mention that I seem unable to wake up anymore without a Provigil.
Posted by Tabitha on December 22, 2005, at 11:30:20
In reply to Re: alcohol/Fallsfall » Voce, posted by ClearSkies on December 22, 2005, at 6:06:11
> All those warnings on the pill bottles to "don't take this medication with alcohol"? Well, I wish our doctors and pharmacists would be more assertive in telling us that chronic and heavy use of alcohol will actually keep us from getting better.
>I never realized that either. I was not a daily drinker, but more of a weekend binger. And not necessarily every single weekend either. I really didn't believe it was affecting my moods significantly. But I learned I was wrong, once I finally quit. My moods (and life) finally started to stabilize. So I feel bad for people with mood disorders who are somewhere in the mild-to-moderate alcohol abuse category.
Yet I know that it wasn't just education that was missing. My T had been telling me for years that my drinking was contributing to my depression, but hearing that didn't make much difference. I think the addictive nature of alcohol gives you some blind spots in your reasoning. So as much as I might want to harp on the subject, I know it most likely won't be heard. It's really hard to known what to say to someone.
Posted by ClearSkies on December 22, 2005, at 11:36:44
In reply to Re: alcohol/Fallsfall, posted by Tabitha on December 22, 2005, at 11:30:20
> So as much as I might want to harp on the subject, I know it most likely won't be heard. It's really hard to known what to say to someone.
>
>Yeah, that's why I usually don't say anything.
CS
Posted by LadyBug on December 22, 2005, at 14:53:15
In reply to Re: alcohol, posted by Dinah on December 22, 2005, at 10:24:32
Being married to an addict/alcoholic I can see the damage it can cause. No one sets out to become and alcoholic or an addict. It is fun at first, then it becomes a habit, one that could be broken, then it becomes an addiction, one that takes over and keeps you prisioner of your own self. I know a certain personality is more prone to addiction, but the real problem lies in what's causing the person to want to escape! There are issues behind the drinking! The drinking is only a symptom of the addiction.
I won't comdem anyone for trying to escape the pain many of us feel at times. My escape is to just crawl in bed, pull my down filled comforter up over my head and go to sleep. I realize this is what works for me and so that's what I choose to do.
I can only say the hell I've been through with the drinking my husband has done over the years. He doesn't drink hardly ever, but pain meds are more his choice and it makes me nuts. It makes things worse! But he's more of an addict than anything. I haven't had a drink in almost 20 years, not my thing!
Don't do it, easier said than done. I understand that a drunk craves the drink just as someone wants a drink of water when they're thirsty. Or the drug if it's that choice.
My 2 cents, take what you like and leave the rest!
LadyBug
Posted by Tamar on December 22, 2005, at 20:13:07
In reply to alcohol, posted by fallsfall on December 21, 2005, at 22:31:59
Thanks for the thread, Falls.
I know I’ve recently mentioned my self medication with alcohol, though others have recently mentioned self medication with other drugs.
I think it’s good to have a discussion about this. It’s very relevant to me, because my father was an alcoholic for many years.
I know I can’t make things better by drinking. I often feel a bit less depressed when I drink, but it doesn’t provide much relief. I’m careful about how much I drink (and yet my idea of ‘not much’ is probably many people’s idea of ‘excessive’: I rarely drink more than one bottle of wine in an evening; but I weigh 200 lbs…). I know that it isn’t completely safe.
Yeah, I think you’re right. Drinking is one of the less positive coping mechanisms. I’ve recently given up smoking, which is of course the most dangerous thing a person can do to himself/herself. I’m currently compensating with food and alcohol.
I’d like things to be easier…
Thanks for your input.
Tamar
Posted by fairywings on December 22, 2005, at 20:34:32
In reply to alcohol, posted by fallsfall on December 21, 2005, at 22:31:59
(((Tamar)))
What you've said is from the heart, not meant as a criticism. You said it out of concern, and how could anyone take that differently? My dad was an alcoholic, my brothers drank heavily, did drugs, now one is fine, and the other is a gambling addict and about to lose his home and car. It's obvious you want to spare anyone the pain that alcohol might cause, and if only one person hears you then it's worthwhile.
hugs,
fw
Posted by fairywings on December 22, 2005, at 20:37:30
In reply to Re: alcohol » fallsfall, posted by fairywings on December 22, 2005, at 20:34:32
Posted by Susan47 on December 25, 2005, at 13:19:36
In reply to alcohol, posted by fallsfall on December 21, 2005, at 22:31:59
I didn't read all of your post fallsfall and I didn't read the rest of the thread yet, but to get this off my chest, I drink AND I smoke an illicit substance because it helps me control my mood. I mean, not control it so much, as change it. And I also tend to forget everything. Which, even though it's destructive, makes life more bearable for the time being.. and I know I'll suffer in some way for this in the end, I know I'll pay a price. My grandmother had Alzheimer's when she died. My mother is terrified of getting it, herself. And I'm wiping out a lot of my connections, or I feel that I am so I'm sure I must be. I don't know if it's temporary or permanent. I know it's a way of coping. I don't know a better one, I honestly don't.
Posted by fallsfall on December 25, 2005, at 20:13:05
In reply to Re: alcohol » fallsfall, posted by Susan47 on December 25, 2005, at 13:19:36
Sometimes using a less than ideal coping mechanism is better than using no coping mechanism at all. Sometimes a less than ideal coping mechanism is all that we have.
The hope is that over time, we can replace those coping mechanisms with less harmful ones.
Good luck.
Posted by Susan47 on December 27, 2005, at 14:34:24
In reply to Re: alcohol » Susan47, posted by fallsfall on December 25, 2005, at 20:13:05
Thanks fallsfall, and quite honestly, I think I am finding a way. I have a long ways to go, perhaps, I really can't predict. Maybe tomorrow I can give it up, I know it's a matter of being able to control my thinking.
But one thing I am doing, is setting my sights on the future I want for myself, and I think that might help.. a lot.. and thanks again, for being kind fallsfall.
This is the end of the thread.
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