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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 13 of 13. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by Poet on July 16, 2005, at 11:59:08
I must sound completely crazy as I got an appointment within a week of calling. I am not looking forward to going through all those questions.
I called former pdoc to tell him that I wouldn't be seeing him anymore and that I am okay on the reduced meds. Also that the insurance problem makes him unaffordable. He called my T to tell her that I terminated him. I am surprised he actually cared about me enough to want to talk to her. He has called her before, so I guess it isn't that much of a surprise, but this time I told him I won't see him anymore. I thought he'd just put my file in the closed out drawer and be done with it.
I know I need to call T and tell her that I am seeing a new pdoc. I don't know why I didn't tell her on Tuesday when I talked to her on the phone or Thursday in person. Maybe I am ashamed that I need meds and pdocs, and that therapy isn't enough? Hmm, I think that might be it.
Poet
Posted by Jazzed on July 16, 2005, at 21:53:57
In reply to Appointment with New Pdoc- Did Not Tell T, posted by Poet on July 16, 2005, at 11:59:08
>
> I know I need to call T and tell her that I am seeing a new pdoc. I don't know why I didn't tell her on Tuesday when I talked to her on the phone or Thursday in person. Maybe I am ashamed that I need meds and pdocs, and that therapy isn't enough? Hmm, I think that might be it.
>
>
Hi Poet,I wouldn't worry about telling your T. I mean you left the p-doc for legitimate reasons. Most ppl couldn't afford a p-doc if they didn't have ins. As a matter of fact, mine told me just weeks ago, that some of his clients would leave a 10 year relationship if they didn't have the ins. I think your T might too given the same situation.
As far as needing meds and needing therapy. I guess sometimes the combo is the best, sometimes one or the other is enough. It just depends on the situation and the person. I don't think your T would think any less of you for having a chemical imbalance any more than needing any other medication.
Don't be so hard on yourself! I bet your T won't be.
Jazzy
Posted by Shortelise on July 16, 2005, at 22:39:34
In reply to Appointment with New Pdoc- Did Not Tell T, posted by Poet on July 16, 2005, at 11:59:08
My thought is maybe you feel you're telling your T she isn't doing a good enough job because you still need meds?
ShortE
Posted by Dinah on July 17, 2005, at 8:58:22
In reply to Appointment with New Pdoc- Did Not Tell T, posted by Poet on July 16, 2005, at 11:59:08
Well, you won't need to bring up the topic now. :) Ex-pdocs are good for something.
Did he have a relationship of any sort with your therapist? Did she recommend him?
I stuck with pdoc from h*ll longer than I should have because he worked with the clinic my therapist was at, and I didn't want to insult my therapist by hating the pdoc enough to leave.
Posted by Poet on July 17, 2005, at 11:53:07
In reply to Re: Appointment with New Pdoc- Did Not Tell T » Poet, posted by Jazzed on July 16, 2005, at 21:53:57
Hi Jazzy.
I know it's me projecting again (and again and again.) It's me that doesn't want meds. My T suggested them in the first place. She'd be relieved to hear that I am seeing another pdoc. She had to force me to see the old one.
I don't know if I will give new pdoc permission to call my T. Even though they don't work at the same clinic, I should think of them as a treatment team, but I am not a team player. I need to be in control of who knows what. I know, that's not a good thing, either.
Poet
Posted by Poet on July 17, 2005, at 12:06:04
In reply to Re: Appointment with New Pdoc- Did Not Tell T » Poet, posted by Shortelise on July 16, 2005, at 22:39:34
Hi ShortE,
That is definitely a part of it. She is a great therapist, I am a lousy client. I cannot figure out why she puts up with me.
I know that for some people therapy, alone, isn't the answer. I just don't know if meds are really doing anything or for that matter if therapy is really doing anything. Either way I blame myself for not taking meds as directed and for not being better at therapy.
Plus blame myself for zero self esteem, and blame myself for...
Poet
Posted by Shortelise on July 17, 2005, at 12:10:32
In reply to Re: Appointment with New Pdoc- Did Not Tell T » Jazzed, posted by Poet on July 17, 2005, at 11:53:07
Poet, I don't blame you a bit for wanting to be in control of the flow of info between your T and pdoc.
It feels like gossip. My T is a psychiatrist so I'm not in the exact spot you are, but I do have a neurologist, and a gyn who prescribes HRT, a family doc, etc. and my T wants to communicate with them, has to, in fact, with the family doc due to the Canadian system of re-referrals every six months.
I hate the idea of them talking about me. I get a copy of the report and request for re-referral that my T sends to my family doc, and it's usually pretty benign. But I hate it that he takes me out of the room and talks about me to these other docs. I give my permission, but I don't like it.
ShortE
Posted by Poet on July 17, 2005, at 12:18:42
In reply to Re: Appointment with New Pdoc- Did Not Tell T » Poet, posted by Dinah on July 17, 2005, at 8:58:22
Hi Dinah,
If I give new pdoc permission to call my T, she'll take care of letting her know I am seeing her. ;) Though I don't think I am going to do that as I don't like people talking about me when I am not there to defend myself.
T didn't know ex pdoc. I had a very short list of pdocs covered by my old and new insurance. She just wanted me to see any pdoc ASAP since I refused inpatient. Still refuse inpatient, so she'd be happy that I am seeing a new pdoc.
I am still functioning. I am going to the hidious orientation for my new hidious job. I will not burst into tears and quit, even though I want to. I need a paycheck, depression is not allowed. I don't think meds will help me in anyway, but I will go see new pdoc.
I hope I like her and that she won't go out of network like ex pdoc did. Damn him, he now works for my old employer. The one that drove me into the major depression last year. Is that irony or what?
Poet
Posted by Dinah on July 17, 2005, at 14:35:37
In reply to Re: Appointment with New Pdoc- Did Not Tell T » Jazzed, posted by Poet on July 17, 2005, at 11:53:07
My pdoc and therapist have never talked. My pdoc has no desire to talk to my therapist. My therapist would like it, but in the face of my pdoc's lack of desire and my reservations, he doesn't insist.
Posted by Jazzed on July 17, 2005, at 14:43:49
In reply to Re: Appointment with New Pdoc- Did Not Tell T » Dinah, posted by Poet on July 17, 2005, at 12:18:42
I'm so sorry you're so depressed right now Poet. Does your new doc know how you feel about the depression, your job, and that you don't think the meds will help? How often will you see her?I hope the job doesn't turn out to be as bad as you're thinking. I hate orientations too, and training, it's so hard to get through all of that and get adjusted.
My p-doc and T are in the same office and they don't discuss me. Unless it's necessary, I don't see why you'd have to give your permission for them to talk. Now that your T knows you fired your ex p-doc, I suppose you could wait for her to bring it up. Why waste precious therapy time on that when it might not even be necessary?
Jazzy
Posted by Poet on July 18, 2005, at 16:56:06
In reply to Re: Appointment with New Pdoc- Did Not Tell T » Poet, posted by Dinah on July 17, 2005, at 14:35:37
Hi Dinah,
Ex pdoc wanted to talk to her after my first appointment with him. He probably just wanted to know how they could work together, but I always took it as a threat. *If you don't start feeling better, I am calling your therapist.* To her credit, my T never called him, but I tell her more stuff.
Poet
Posted by Poet on July 18, 2005, at 17:03:54
In reply to Re: Appointment with New Pdoc- Did Not Tell T » Poet, posted by Jazzed on July 17, 2005, at 14:43:49
Hi Jazzy,
New pdoc just knows I am coming in as a new patient for meds management. I don't know how much time she has scheduled. My first appointment with ex Pdoc was an hour, after that 20 minutes. He saw me two weeks after the first appointment, then once a month, then every three months. I assume new pdoc will do the same, then again she's in the insurance network and they might have rules on length of appointments.
Orientation was what I knew it would be. I didn't care. I don't want to work there. My career failure depression goes back decades. New pdoc will just get the abbreviated version or I will take up her whole day.
I don't think I will tell T about new pdoc, but then again I have to see how it goes with new pdoc.
Poet
Posted by Jazzed on July 18, 2005, at 17:19:05
In reply to Re: Appointment with New Pdoc- Did Not Tell T » Jazzed, posted by Poet on July 18, 2005, at 17:03:54
> New pdoc just knows I am coming in as a new patient for meds management. I don't know how much time she has scheduled. My first appointment with ex Pdoc was an hour, after that 20 minutes. He saw me two weeks after the first appointment, then once a month, then every three months. I assume new pdoc will do the same, then again she's in the insurance network and they might have rules on length of appointments.I guess this is pretty standard as far as time, I guess? I hope you get as much time as you want/need, or don't want? I hope it works out and you like her and she can help you.
>
> I didn't care. I don't want to work there. My career failure depression goes back decades.I'm so sorry Poet, this sounds heart wrenching to me.
(((((hugs)))))
Jazzy
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