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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 13 to 37 of 70. Go back in thread:
Posted by alexandra_k on May 4, 2005, at 1:27:00
In reply to Dr. Bob: benevolent or malevolent?, posted by Shy_Girl on May 3, 2005, at 22:59:36
I was a little taken aback by your post over on social. How to describe that...
People say they care about you.
They respond to your posts.
They laugh with you and comiserate with you.
And then you ask whether people care about you or just wish you would go away.I feel like I am being asked to sit a test.
And now a similar thing with Dr Bob.
He tends not to get involved in such conversations. The point of the boards is for us to provide support and information to each other. He just moderates the boards. He doesn't participate as such.
Every now and then people wonder if the boards are some sort of game or experiment. I have wondered. Sometimes I wonder if the whole of life is like that. If there is a creator then what evidence is there that the creator is benevolent? What evidence is there that the creator is malevolent?
Perhaps people are neither solely benevolent or malevolent. People tend to have multiple intentions and don't really seem to be solely one thing or solely another.
You can't prove someones intentions.
But you can provide some support or some information which seems to disconfirm a hypothesis about what someones intentions are. But if you want certainty then you will be disappointed.Typically it is good to assume benovelent intent unless the evidence seems to run contrary to that. Why? Because it makes the world and the people in the world seem more pleasant. If we continually question other peoples motives and continually question whether other people really have bad intentions towards us we tend to feel paranoid and / or angry. Then people tend to withdraw from us.
> Please provide evidence of his benevolence/malevolence.
I can't think of anything that indicates malevolent intent - so I assume that he is generally well intentioned. As are we all.
Posted by NikkiT2 on May 4, 2005, at 1:37:54
In reply to Dr. Bob: benevolent or malevolent?, posted by Shy_Girl on May 3, 2005, at 22:59:36
I think the best evidence is that there are a number of us here who have been here a fairly long time.. theres a group of us who have bene here 6+ years.. many more 4 or 5 years.
If Dr Bob was malevolent, I think we would have left by now..
and I have met a babbler in real life, so partlycloudy can confirm *I* am real!!
Nikki
Posted by SLS on May 4, 2005, at 5:52:59
In reply to Re: Dr. Bob: benevolent or malevolent?, posted by Shy_Girl on May 4, 2005, at 0:20:43
Hi.
> I cannot ask him because it is not his job to reply.
It might not be his job to reply, but that does not leave you with an inability to ask. You don't have to make his decisions for him. Ask.
- Scott
Posted by chemist on May 4, 2005, at 7:16:37
In reply to Re: Dr. Bob: benevolent or malevolent?, posted by Shy_Girl on May 3, 2005, at 23:33:00
hello there, chemist here..the University of Chicago might be home to a very good-natured Assistant Professor of Clinical Psychiatry named Robert Hsiung who does not mind being mistaken for and advertised as the ``Dr.Bob'' who oversees this site...i cannot think of any ill-mannered behaviour emanating from Dr. Hsiung's way, and perceive this website as a service that is good...and yes, i am a real person and not an invention...all the best, chemist
> And during those 4 years, you've actually had real conversations with him? He is a real person? Are you sure? Why in the world would he take time to oversee this site? What is his motivation?...is it "help" people? Are you sure?
>
> Perhaps he's taken a liking to you and so he is seemingly a benevolent person. Do we ever think of the people who have been banished into oblivion? I might be the next to go...a sacrifical lamb. I shouldn't comment on this further.
>
Posted by SLS on May 4, 2005, at 7:48:39
In reply to Re: Dr. B, do u care if I die or not? (nm), posted by Shy_Girl on May 4, 2005, at 0:31:35
Hint:
We all do....
- Scott
Posted by Shy_Girl on May 4, 2005, at 12:50:37
In reply to Dr. Bob: benevolent or malevolent?, posted by Shy_Girl on May 3, 2005, at 22:59:36
I think I deserve a PBC here. Sorry Dr. Bob.
> How Do we know this is not some sort of gAme he is playing with us?...to Control us, manipulate us?
Quoting Dr. Bob:
Sorry, but please don't post anything that could lead others to feel accused or put down.
If you or others have questions about this or about posting policies in general, or are interested in alternative ways of expressing yourself, please see the FAQ:
http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/faq.html#civil
Follow-ups regarding these issues, as well as replies to the above post, should of course themselves be civil.
Posted by Shy_Girl on May 4, 2005, at 13:02:59
In reply to Re: Please be civil » Shy_Girl, posted by Shy_Girl on May 4, 2005, at 12:50:37
Sorry people, I should have given the first post to my civility buddy before posting it, but I was a little suspicious of a conspiracy. I'm sorry about my behaviour, I'm not sure what is wrong with me. I think sometimes that I *might* be playing some sort of elaborate *game* here, but I'm confused because I shouldn't get so upset if it was ONLY a game.
Again, sorry Dr. Bob, I'm sure your intentions are good and not evil. No reply is needed.
Posted by partlycloudy on May 4, 2005, at 13:16:16
In reply to Re: Sorry about my post and behaviour, posted by Shy_Girl on May 4, 2005, at 13:02:59
Shy Girl, I don't think this is a game. What I do think it is, though, is a complex group dynamic. It's easy to see over the course of a few hours how our posts here can affect one another. I hope you can see that you have been received with interest, compassion, and understanding by the other babblers.
So - are *you* playing a game with us?
Posted by Shy_Girl on May 4, 2005, at 14:40:59
In reply to Re: Sorry about my post and behaviour » Shy_Girl, posted by partlycloudy on May 4, 2005, at 13:16:16
> So - are *you* playing a game with us?
No, I don't think I'm playing a game, at least not intentionally. I think my problem is that I get confused sometimes and think that babbleland is a fantasy place. When conversing with individuals IRL I don't seem to have this problem as much.
Part of the reason for my inital question is because I've been hurt immensely by being blocked and I'm not sure if Dr. Bob realizes just how much harm he can inflict upon individuals here. Does the ends (a civil and welcoming community) justify the means (hurting people to the point of self harm or possible death)? The blocked do not have a voice here, so it could be that Dr. Bob does a lot more harm than he realizes. I sincerely hope that people have not killed themselves because of being banned from this alluring community. Perhaps there should be greater warnings about the possible harm of participating in such a community.
Posted by gardenergirl on May 4, 2005, at 14:41:04
In reply to Re: Please be civil » Shy_Girl, posted by Shy_Girl on May 4, 2005, at 12:50:37
Curiouser and curiouser.
Don't forget to drink your Ovaltine!
gg
Posted by sunny10 on May 4, 2005, at 14:53:25
In reply to Who is code directed to? DAC? » Shy_Girl, posted by gardenergirl on May 4, 2005, at 14:41:04
have you been put on any medication recently that may cause you to have paranoid thoughts?
"No one can hurt your feelings unless you let them" is a cliched psychology phrase, but there is truth there.
Neither Dr. Bob nor anyone else can make anyone hurt/kill themselves. Only we have that power.
I don't recall any of your other threads having this kind of "conspiracy theory" intensity to them and it makes me nervous for you. I do wonder if it has anything to do with your recent diagnosis and maybe meds were prescribed?
I certainly don't feel comfortable that these thoughts are racing through your mind; they must be really hurting you inside.
Could you see whether a change of meds (or getting some if you don't have prescriptions) would help you to feel better?
I care about you, no codes and no games- and no, I don't believe the board needs a god, if that was your coded question.
We have a very benevolent administrator here who simply is providing us with a platform to meet and help each other. His rules only exist so that we don't hurt each other by accident.
There have been a couple mean posters, but the rest of us push them out pretty darn fast, so we'll try to protect you from them like we protect ourselves.
Take care, okay?
-sunny10
Posted by Dinah on May 4, 2005, at 14:54:30
In reply to Re: Am I playing a game? » partlycloudy, posted by Shy_Girl on May 4, 2005, at 14:40:59
There have also been suicidal actions as a result from incivility from fellow posters.
When I first started Babbling, I was very much in contact with my therapist about whether this was a healthy place to be given my mental state at that time. I think anyone involved in anything where they doubt their own ability to cope with the consequences of participating should contact their own mental health practitioner and discuss their concerns.
Dr. Bob is the first to admit that Babble is not for everyone.
But Babble itself probably isn't in the best place to determine that for any poster. The best place is for a poster to confer with his therapist or psychiatrist.
Have you discussed your feelings with your therapist?
Posted by Shy_Girl on May 4, 2005, at 16:09:09
In reply to Re: Shy_Girl, posted by sunny10 on May 4, 2005, at 14:53:25
> have you been put on any medication recently that may cause you to have paranoid thoughts?
No, I'm only on 40mg Celexa...why do you ask? Did someone make you write this? I didn't say my thoughts are paranoid.
> "No one can hurt your feelings unless you let them" is a cliched psychology phrase, but there is truth there.I'm not letting anyone hurt me. People hurt me anyways.
> Neither Dr. Bob nor anyone else can make anyone hurt/kill themselves. Only *we?* have that power.No, but one can intentionally drive a person to do so through careful manipulation.
> I don't recall any of your other threads having this kind of "conspiracy theory" intensity to them and it makes me nervous for you.How do you know for sure?
>I do wonder if it has anything to do with your recent diagnosis and maybe meds were prescribed?
There is nothing seriously wrong with me, my pdoc told me so...that is why I only need Celexa.
> I certainly don't feel comfortable that these thoughts are racing through your mind; they must be really hurting you inside.
What makes you think my thoughts are racing???
> Could you see whether a change of meds (or getting some if you don't have prescriptions) would help you to feel better?
What's with the meds? Why do you want to push meds on me?? This is not the meds board...this is inappropriate.
> Take care, okay?
> -sunny10Ok, thanks for the concern.
Posted by Shy_Girl on May 4, 2005, at 16:15:11
In reply to Re: Am I playing a game? » Shy_Girl, posted by Dinah on May 4, 2005, at 14:54:30
> ... I think anyone involved in anything where they doubt their own ability to cope with the consequences of participating should contact their own mental health practitioner and discuss their concerns.
(snip)
> Have you discussed your feelings with your therapist?
My pdoc said the block was like going to jail for shopping-lifting, it doesn't matter why I did the bad thing. She said you guys don't want me dead, because the group values life.
This is beside the point...this discussion is going off topic and doesn't belong in admin.
Posted by Shy_Girl on May 4, 2005, at 16:32:54
In reply to Re: Am I playing a game?, posted by Shy_Girl on May 4, 2005, at 16:15:11
Take a look at this:
http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20050426/msgs/491615.html
Then the poster changed and wrote me this:
http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20050426/msgs/491897.html
That was just what I needed to feel better...now how can a person change one's thoughts and writing style so abruptly without influence?? How can I be sure someone was not telling the poster what to write?
Posted by gardenergirl on May 4, 2005, at 16:49:19
In reply to Re: Possible conspiracy?, posted by Shy_Girl on May 4, 2005, at 16:32:54
Posted by TofuEmmy on May 4, 2005, at 17:14:12
In reply to Re: Possible conspiracy?, posted by Shy_Girl on May 4, 2005, at 16:32:54
I guess there are several possibilities.
1) I COULD have posted, then conspired with someone to....um...cheer you up?
2) I could have been angry and hurt in my first post. Then later, calmed down and posted to you again?
3) I could have DID.
4) I could be a moody wench.
5) I could be conspiring with Dr Bob to infiltrate the web and all brains attached to it.
6) I could have had PMS, then took a pill.
7) I could have been..um...too bored to go on.
You get the drift. The possibilities are endless. See #2 and #4 for the truth. Sure wished you had ASKED me instead of accusing of me of conspiring with lord knows who to do who knows what.
emmy
Posted by gardenergirl on May 4, 2005, at 18:02:11
In reply to Re: I'm a Conspirator ? Neato. » Shy_Girl, posted by TofuEmmy on May 4, 2005, at 17:14:12
I thInk moody wench is just Fine, reAlly. I mean, I'm only fRiends with you because I'm afraid noT to bE.
Just kidDing.
:-p
gg
Posted by Shy_Girl on May 4, 2005, at 18:23:54
In reply to Re: I'm a Conspirator ? Neato. » TofuEmmy, posted by gardenergirl on May 4, 2005, at 18:02:11
Hehe, gg...that's funny
Sorry TofuEmmy, I didn't mean to say you were a conspirator in a bad way. Whether or not it was conspired or not, it was nice 'cause it made me feel better, thanks.
ok, back to admin :-)
Posted by TofuEmmy on May 4, 2005, at 18:47:00
In reply to Re: I'm a Conspirator ? Neato. » TofuEmmy, posted by gardenergirl on May 4, 2005, at 18:02:11
GG - I never knew you cared enough to...um...open yourself up like that!! (wrinkles nose...)
P.S. you win the contest for my very favoritist post ever! you made me snort cranberry juice.
Posted by henrietta on May 4, 2005, at 20:04:41
In reply to Who is code directed to? DAC? » Shy_Girl, posted by gardenergirl on May 4, 2005, at 14:41:04
this isn't the first time i've wanted to ask you this, by any means. are you quite sure you're in the right profession? just curious
Posted by Dinah on May 4, 2005, at 20:19:28
In reply to Re: Who is code directed to? DAC? » gardenergirl, posted by henrietta on May 4, 2005, at 20:04:41
I'm quite sure she would do well in any number of professions. Therapy is lucky to get her.
Posted by Dinah on May 4, 2005, at 20:24:59
In reply to Re: Am I playing a game? » Shy_Girl, posted by Dinah on May 4, 2005, at 14:54:30
wrote it, but I wasn't home and then forgot.
> There have also been suicidal actions as a result from incivility from fellow posters.
I phrased that badly, and not as I intended. I should have said behavior of, not incivility from. I've been known to make desperate calls to my therapist over posts that weren't uncivil.
So I guess I'm sort of trying to say what Sunny said.
When I was in school, getting less than an A would send me careening into depression. But there was nothing wrong with teachers giving grades less than an A. My reactions were my own.
Am I getting it right, Sunny?
Posted by Dinah on May 4, 2005, at 20:26:42
In reply to Oops. I've been meaning to restate this since I, posted by Dinah on May 4, 2005, at 20:24:59
Does that mean next time I have to believe him when he says I can't *make* him mad?
Posted by gardenergirl on May 4, 2005, at 20:38:10
In reply to Re: Who is code directed to? DAC? » gardenergirl, posted by henrietta on May 4, 2005, at 20:04:41
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Psycho-Babble Administration | Extras | FAQ
Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.org
Script revised: February 4, 2008
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/cgi-bin/pb/mget.pl
Copyright 2006-17 Robert Hsiung.
Owned and operated by Dr. Bob LLC and not the University of Chicago.