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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 24 of 24. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by linkadge on February 23, 2012, at 18:45:55
My normal state is not 'clinically depressed'.
Most of my life is just bla. Every day is bla. I just kind of waft through life. Eat, sleep, work, whatever. I just feel that life is meaningless, but yet not sad. Just - nothing. I'm not relly sad, or anxious most of the time.
The major depression sets in when my brain starts to think...this is all there is.
I'm going to go through my life every day feeling nothing. Then I start to get panicky, and start doing stupid things like not sleeping or eating.
Posted by poser938 on February 23, 2012, at 18:54:16
In reply to dysthymia =) MDD, posted by linkadge on February 23, 2012, at 18:45:55
i guess i'm alot like you. i can just lay in bed all day and not care about anything. but when i try to think about things, i just start feeling bad and hopeless.
if my brain would be able to tolerate it for more than a few weeks without shutting off my emotions further, adderall would be the miracle drug for me.
but if i could just go back to being my normal pre-medication self, that would be even better.have you ever tried any dopamine raising meds? also, in my experience serotonin raising meds only increase dysthymia and make you more able to just not care about anything.
Posted by Phillipa on February 23, 2012, at 23:37:37
In reply to Re: dysthymia =) MDD, posted by poser938 on February 23, 2012, at 18:54:16
I would like to care less have more of a "oh well" attitude as I do the opposite worry worry till get itchy skin and start crawling out of my skin just want out go anywhere to forget. Phillipa
Posted by Twinleaf on February 24, 2012, at 6:24:24
In reply to Re: dysthymia =) MDD, posted by Phillipa on February 23, 2012, at 23:37:37
I know I have made this observation before, but the symptoms you are describing are just the kind that therapy can help with ( and medications can only help to a limited extent) . I know you have said that you can't find a good therapist, but I'm sure there's one out there who's just right for you! From your posts here over the years, you have all the things you need to be successful in therapy: insight, an ability to relate well to others, and a willingness to look at things in a new way. From what you have said, the one thing you may not have quite so much is a willingness to change. But that can change and develop once you get into therapy and begin to see its' possibilities. Why not enlist the help of your pdoc and give it one more real try? I bet you would be so glad you did it.
Posted by linkadge on February 24, 2012, at 15:52:51
In reply to Re: dysthymia =) MDD, posted by Twinleaf on February 24, 2012, at 6:24:24
>I know I have made this observation before, but >the symptoms you are describing are just the >kind that therapy can help with ( and >medications can only help to a limited extent) .
I kind of disagree. I have been in therapy before. (Probably over a hundred sessions over the years.)
How does it make you find meaning or enjoyment in your life?
Its like my emotional tastebuds are dead. We can put the same food in our mouths. I taste nothing.
Therapy can only make you combat irrational thoughts or emotions.
My thoughts are not irrational.
Can therapy teach a robot to feel?
Linkadge
Posted by Twinleaf on February 24, 2012, at 16:39:38
In reply to Re: dysthymia =) MDD » Twinleaf, posted by linkadge on February 24, 2012, at 15:52:51
I have gotten the impression that a good deal of the distress Philippa expresses is due to difficulties in relationships - estrangement from her children and grandchildren and marriage stresses, so it seemed as though a relationship- focused therapy would be the most helpful. I don't get the sense that she has MDD or bipolar for which medication would be central. I could certainly be wrong about this.
Posted by sigismund on February 24, 2012, at 17:14:34
In reply to Re: dysthymia =) MDD » Twinleaf, posted by linkadge on February 24, 2012, at 15:52:51
>Therapy can only make you combat irrational thoughts or emotions.
I wonder if therapy is good for people who essentially need to be parented after emotional deprivation, not meaning anyone of course.
Posted by Phillipa on February 24, 2012, at 18:31:55
In reply to Re: dysthymia =) MDD, posted by Twinleaf on February 24, 2012, at 16:39:38
Twinleaf you are surely on target reguarding me. When I recently changed pdocs first thing I asked for was did I need theraphy he said no. I do as I once did have one that helped and another pdoc felt threatened cause she saw things differently than him. She also worked with his practice so he won. And both I and husband were seeing her and both were benefiting. I recently ran into the one I saw here for a year in a store asked about therapists her and I definitely were not a good fit. She's the one who forgot what she had asked from session to session. She said that most the experienced therapists here were no longer practicing. She was but never her again. Have trouble finding one that also accepts medicare, have United health now also. Last time I googled therapists in Charlotte NC or Matthews NC couldn't find one. If you ever find time. You are so astute in knowing me from an online forum maybe you could use the third party perspective and take a google peek? It would be so appreciated. And boy I sure agree on the meds. No bipolar for sure. Was pure anxiety for all these years, add the thyroid and you have it. And yes to family. Phillipa
Posted by linkadge on February 24, 2012, at 19:03:05
In reply to Re: dysthymia =) MDD, posted by Twinleaf on February 24, 2012, at 16:39:38
>I don't get the sense that she has MDD or >bipolar for which medication would be central. I >could certainly be wrong about this.
Well, that's quite some diagnostic ability you have! "I don't get the sense" that you really have a friggen clue what Phillipa's underlying issue is.
I've spent enough time in therapy. All I get is more mental anguish from wracking my brain trying to think that changing my attitude or behavior will make a damn bit of difference. Its not that simple and people like you, with your stupid 'hunches' are not helping.
-I was never abused
-I had a great childhood
-I had and have a loving father and mother
-I was never teased or bullied
-I did fairly well in school.
-I'm not hidiously ugly
-I am not in debt
-I have a good relationship with my parents and sibblings
-I have no chronic health problems, I'm 28 an in good shape.
-I have a solid job.
-I have some faith, I pray,
-I'm not narcissistic
-I'm not materialistic
-I volunteer in a retirement home 2 nights a week
-I give to charity,
-I exercise every day
-I eat very well.
I have been unable to feel any meaning in my life for over a decade - and therapy or medications have never been able to dint that.Leave me alone, please and thank you.
Linkadge
Posted by Twinleaf on February 24, 2012, at 19:24:54
In reply to Re: dysthymia =) MDD » Twinleaf, posted by Phillipa on February 24, 2012, at 18:31:55
I don't know how I could help with that, as it is just a list of names, isn't it? Despite your pdoc's opinion, you could ask him for the names of several therapists. Many of the younger ones who are building their practices do take Medicare. If you interview three or four recommended ones, you have a better chance of finding one who's a good fit for you. Don't go to anyone who doesn't feel right to you!
Posted by Phillipa on February 24, 2012, at 19:49:45
In reply to Re: dysthymia =) MDD, posted by Twinleaf on February 24, 2012, at 19:24:54
Twinleaf I do understand. But unlike Linkage. I do have childhood emotional abuse, I was more the bully in school beat up boys, I am not narcissistic, very insecure, brought up with no faith at all. I don't know how to believe after being an RN I was taught you had to see to believe and I need someone very strong to guide me. I'm honestly terrified of death and don't know how to accept it. I worry incessantly about health issues, cancer, heart disease, this neighborhood is well to do and I'm now at the bottom of the financial ladder so I do feel like I'm materialistic to a point. Example and I do know I'm fooling myself but when had cosmetic surgery looked younger felt younger hence not as old as I am. I'm in shock that in less than a month I will turn 66. Now that is old. How does one change at my age? I know you can't do the work for me. I'm somewhat dependant now when younger so independant as needed to be to survive this instinct kind of is burned out. It's very hard. Maybe not for others but for me it is. Twinleaf you are truly perceptive. And I do so appreciate it. Thanks Phillipa
Posted by Twinleaf on February 24, 2012, at 20:46:23
In reply to Re: dysthymia =) MDD » Twinleaf, posted by Phillipa on February 24, 2012, at 19:49:45
I don't think you are too old to benefit from therapy at all. 66 is not "old" these days -you have all of your intelligence and probably have many, many more years to live. The things you mention as being problematic for you are the kinds of issues which tend to get a lot better with therapy, provided you have someone you feel good about working with. I think you and I are somewhat alike, as childhood traumas and adult fears have been the main things I have been dealing with; all of it bothers me so much less now that I have been working with a therapist who is right for me. I do wish the same for you!
Posted by Phillipa on February 24, 2012, at 20:50:12
In reply to Re: dysthymia =) MDD, posted by Twinleaf on February 24, 2012, at 20:46:23
Twinleaf you have given me some hope which have been lacking. Will try again. Thanks Phillipa
Posted by Twinleaf on February 24, 2012, at 22:01:27
In reply to Re: dysthymia =) MDD » Twinleaf, posted by Phillipa on February 24, 2012, at 20:50:12
I'm so glad you are thinking of trying again. I hope you find someone wonderful.
Posted by 10derheart on February 24, 2012, at 23:28:31
In reply to Re: dysthymia =) MDD » Twinleaf, posted by Phillipa on February 24, 2012, at 18:31:55
Look here:
http://www.mhacentralcarolinas.org/findapractitioner.cfm?t=4
There are a few listed as either accepting Medicare and/or being United Healthcare providers. I know it's not always correct or up-to-date, but if you have not checked on all of them, might be worth a few calls. Some accept sliding fees, so those might be financially possible if you are a good fit and come to an agreement.
You are right, it's tough to find a lot that still accept Medicare.
I have another idea, but I need a couple days to let it come together. I'll be back.
Posted by papillon2 on February 25, 2012, at 0:28:47
In reply to Re: dysthymia =) MDD » Phillipa, posted by 10derheart on February 24, 2012, at 23:28:31
Guys, I think you are talking at cross wires. I'm pretty sure Twinleaf's posts regarding therapy are directed at Phillipa, not you Linkage.
Peace.
Posted by sigismund on February 25, 2012, at 2:28:55
In reply to Re: dysthymia =) MDD, posted by linkadge on February 24, 2012, at 19:03:05
>I have been unable to feel any meaning in my life for over a decade
What is meaning?
If you felt any, how would your life be different?
Since life, on the face of it has none, I guess you are supposed to find and make it yourself?
Perhaps it is perfectly reasonable to feel that life has no meaning?
Posted by SLS on February 25, 2012, at 6:30:17
In reply to Re: dysthymia =) MDD, posted by linkadge on February 24, 2012, at 19:03:05
> -I was never abused
> -I had a great childhood
> -I had and have a loving father and mother
> -I was never teased or bullied
> -I did fairly well in school.
> -I'm not hidiously ugly
> -I am not in debt
> -I have a good relationship with my parents and sibblings
> -I have no chronic health problems, I'm 28 an in good shape.
> -I have a solid job.
> -I have some faith, I pray,
> -I'm not narcissistic
> -I'm not materialistic
> -I volunteer in a retirement home 2 nights a week
> -I give to charity,
> -I exercise every day
> -I eat very well.
Yes, but were you Bar Mitzvahed?I'm sure you understand that Bipolar Disorder can occur without any exogenous triggers; more so than Major Depressive Disorder. When my depression began to emerge, it felt more like dysthymia than depression. Perhaps you are expressing a soft-bipolar illness. I don't know.
I don't like seeing ill, so I find myself occasionally throwing out ideas and observations at you. I doubt there is much I can come up with that you haven't come up with for yourself already. I never mean to insult your intelligence.
I'm glad you posted your list. It helped me to get to know you and appreciate your illness a little better.
Be well.
- Scott
Posted by SLS on February 25, 2012, at 6:36:14
In reply to Re: dysthymia =) MDD » linkadge, posted by sigismund on February 25, 2012, at 2:28:55
> >I have been unable to feel any meaning in my life for over a decade
>
> What is meaning?
> If you felt any, how would your life be different?
> Since life, on the face of it has none, I guess you are supposed to find and make it yourself?
> Perhaps it is perfectly reasonable to feel that life has no meaning?
For me, when I asked myself the question of what is the meaning of life, the best I could come up with was, "Life is its own meaning". It works well for me. It doesn't even require a belief in God. Spirituality helps, though.
- Scott
Posted by sigismund on February 25, 2012, at 11:02:16
In reply to Re: dysthymia =) MDD » sigismund, posted by SLS on February 25, 2012, at 6:36:14
When the way you feel about life becomes part of an observable larger pattern?
That is one type for me, sometimes.
And then there's relationships with people.
Posted by Phillipa on February 25, 2012, at 18:45:54
In reply to Re: dysthymia =) MDD » Phillipa, posted by 10derheart on February 24, 2012, at 23:28:31
Thanks 10der will take a look and you can always babblemail if you prefer. Looking forward to hearing your plan. Phillipa
Posted by bleauberry on February 26, 2012, at 8:13:26
In reply to dysthymia =) MDD, posted by linkadge on February 23, 2012, at 18:45:55
Realizing we are all wired a bit different, and our own disease alters wiring even more, my experience suggests norepinephrine is the bigger player in dysthymia than the other neuros. Most people would tend to think dopamine but I disagree. But they are all involved to some degree...much interaction and crosstalk...but NE the main focus. The hard part is finding the right mechanism....more firing?....more reuptake?....which reuptake inhibitor?....more raw materials?....agonism?....antagonism?...how much effect needed, if any, on 5ht and DA along with NE?....
Anyway, for this failed ECT survivor, the best dysthymia treatments I have encountered are:
savella low dose
amisulpride
ultra low dose nortriptyline+zoloft
professional massage
anti-inflammation and antipathogen strategies
reading the New Testament
vicodin
rhodiola
music that is engaging and loud
Posted by bleauberry on February 26, 2012, at 8:20:41
In reply to dysthymia =) MDD, posted by linkadge on February 23, 2012, at 18:45:55
Oh, and forgot to mention in my last post something that can work very well for dysthymia at low doses....1 to 3 puffs 2 to 3 times per day....medical marijuana of the sativa dominant strains. If you live in a medical marijuana State then it can be legal....if you don't, then it's not legal but still works. The hard part in a non-legal State is the unreliability of the underground market as it is nearly impossible to get the same strain that works for you every time. Not saying I'm a fan or not, just saying I have seen a handful of psych people with long tortured histories on meds who do quite well now with just their low dose limited puffs and nothing else.
Posted by poser938 on February 27, 2012, at 21:18:47
In reply to dysthymia =) MDD, posted by linkadge on February 23, 2012, at 18:45:55
linkadge, i've mentioned this a few times in cases where it has worked great for me. cyproheptadine. no, it isn't even a psychiatric med.. but in my case it did work very well to turn my "emotional taste buds" on.
i dont know what all meds you have tried, but before i got too tolerant to it, it worked amazingly for me.
This is the end of the thread.
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