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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 2906 to 2930 of 8406. Go back in thread:
Posted by vandy on May 11, 2003, at 4:12:39
In reply to Re: New to Lexapro and feeling awful » blkvettes, posted by JaneB on May 10, 2003, at 15:17:15
I'm no expert. Having admitted that I believe that AD's are helpers. They get you to the place where you can function and you do the rest. Some people can then stop the AD. Many can not due to tricks their genetic make up played on their body chemistry. I'm sure grateful for the advance of science which lets us target an imbalance with more and more specificity so we can get on with our lives with fewer and fewer negative side effects.
Posted by lil' jimi on May 11, 2003, at 13:00:19
In reply to Re: New to Lexapro and feeling awful, posted by pumpkin on May 10, 2003, at 23:21:35
Posted by Okpolosi on May 11, 2003, at 14:47:27
In reply to Re: New to Lexapro and feeling awful » under the weather, posted by leeran on May 11, 2003, at 2:07:37
> UTW (my acronym for your name :-),
>
> I found the Lexapro alone (more accurately, the Lexapro without Wellbutrin) to be very exhausting. I don't recall yawning but I hardly felt able to function (I didn't realize that my psychiatrist wanted me to stay on Wellbutrin and add Lexapro, so I really messed myself up for about a month and it's taken quite a bit to get back on track).
>
> Are you taking 10 mg. of Lexapro? I know that's the smallest dosage available without using a pill cutter to go down to 5 mg. or 2.5 (which I did a few times in the last few weeks).
>
> I have noticed a headache at about 4:00 every afternoon since taking Lexapro, which is easily relieved with two Extra Strength Excedrin. Today was the first day I didn't need the Excedrin. I just realized that.
>
> I really didn't start to feel a positive difference until day sixteen (and that's on 5 mg. per day). I've read of some people not seeing much difference until the four week mark.
>
> Hang in there!!! Most of these anti-depressants (SSRIs) seem to take at least two weeks to really get in your system and make a difference.
>
>Sometimes it takes longer than that...I did not actually feel the Lex working until my 9th week.
GOOD LUCK ANG HANG IN THERE< we're all pulling for you!!
Posted by Donia on May 11, 2003, at 17:05:46
In reply to Re: New to Lexapro and feeling awful, posted by pumpkin on May 10, 2003, at 23:21:35
Great post pumpkin, we have to do what we have to do to be able to live with this condition. I dont judge anyone for their decisions.
Posted by Donia on May 11, 2003, at 17:11:08
In reply to Re: do the meds really work? my opinion, posted by under the weather on May 11, 2003, at 1:25:02
As far as I know almost all of the ADs have side effects at first. My doc told me the first month is generally side effects and that it takes that long usually for the med to work. I have felt worse on the ADs in the beginning but when they kick in and the side effects wear off, I feel so much better. The idea is whether you can handle the side effects long enough to get relief. I would say the time between side effects going away and the med starting to work is a month. Some side effects linger a little longer, but mine have subsided.
Posted by pumpkin on May 12, 2003, at 18:48:13
In reply to Re: New to Lexapro and feeling awful, posted by Donia on May 11, 2003, at 17:05:46
Guys,
I had an appointment today with my doc.
After being "talked" to from my counselor, and
family- I decided that I had better tell my doc
that I went completely off my mood stabilizer.One thing that I share with you however, was that
I have felt pretty good- especially this last
week. I have felt like myself for the first time
in over two years! But----- I haven't slept
much, which isen't good.I came right out and told my doctor of what I
did, knowing that he would probably be somewhat
upset. On the contrary, he was understanding.
We had some conversation, and it turns out that
I have been alittle "manic" (no sleep was a good
clue, amoungst others). I am bi-polar (runs
in the family), but do not need as much med as
I was on before. I didn't know that a mood
stabilizer could also "add" to depression. This
is what has been happening to me. So... I am
back on the mood stabilizer (half of what I was
on before). I could actually feel it working
soon after I took it late this morning! I am
SO tired, and look forward to bed tonight.
I am looking forward to the med to reach it's
potential, plus my creativity is coming back-
which is a definate plus! It's been so long...
The climb back isen't over, but improving
(thank the Lord).Watching my 14 month grand-daughter during the
day, and all my other responsibilities is a handful- but I've been so blessed!Staying at 20 mg. of Lex, .25 of Klonopin, and
250 mg. of Depakote. In the future, my doctor
and I are going to try to stop the Klonopin. If
it works fine, if not, I'm fine with that too.
For me- my course had to be taken to find out
EXACTLY what was what. Process of elimination as
painful as it has been... I am grateful!I still have those headaches, but we are thinking
now that it is allergies. Not another "pill"!
LOL.Please keep on posting. Reading is SO encouraging to me, and I feel like I've known
some of you for a very long time! Thanks again.
Posted by leeran on May 12, 2003, at 19:42:27
In reply to SCARED TO DEATH!!!!!!!, posted by blkvettes on March 7, 2003, at 10:15:24
Blkvettes,
Hi there!
I was just looking up the words following words on the internet ("muscle" "spasm" "Lexapro") and a link to one of your posts popped up on Google.
On March 7, 2003 you stated the following:
"I am tired of these muscles spasms, muscle pains, chest pains etc."
It sounds like you almost felt like you were experiencing a heart attack with this medicine at one point - right?
I'm sitting here becoming more and more agitated about this - which is probably making the sensation even worse (tightening of what I guess is the chest wall/pectoral muscle but started out as a lot of discomfort in the back of the neck).
Did you just wait these symptoms out? I'm assuming they eventually wane (hey, isn't your name Wayne?).
Thanks, in advance, for anything you might be able to confirm.
Best,
Lee
Posted by blkvettes on May 12, 2003, at 19:44:29
In reply to A step backwards? A step forwards!, posted by pumpkin on May 12, 2003, at 18:48:13
> Guys,
>
> I had an appointment today with my doc.
> After being "talked" to from my counselor, and
> family- I decided that I had better tell my doc
> that I went completely off my mood stabilizer.
>
> One thing that I share with you however, was that
> I have felt pretty good- especially this last
> week. I have felt like myself for the first time
> in over two years! But----- I haven't slept
> much, which isen't good.
>
> I came right out and told my doctor of what I
> did, knowing that he would probably be somewhat
> upset. On the contrary, he was understanding.
> We had some conversation, and it turns out that
> I have been alittle "manic" (no sleep was a good
> clue, amoungst others). I am bi-polar (runs
> in the family), but do not need as much med as
> I was on before. I didn't know that a mood
> stabilizer could also "add" to depression. This
> is what has been happening to me. So... I am
> back on the mood stabilizer (half of what I was
> on before). I could actually feel it working
> soon after I took it late this morning! I am
> SO tired, and look forward to bed tonight.
> I am looking forward to the med to reach it's
> potential, plus my creativity is coming back-
> which is a definate plus! It's been so long...
> The climb back isen't over, but improving
> (thank the Lord).
>
> Watching my 14 month grand-daughter during the
> day, and all my other responsibilities is a handful- but I've been so blessed!
>
> Staying at 20 mg. of Lex, .25 of Klonopin, and
> 250 mg. of Depakote. In the future, my doctor
> and I are going to try to stop the Klonopin. If
> it works fine, if not, I'm fine with that too.
> For me- my course had to be taken to find out
> EXACTLY what was what. Process of elimination as
> painful as it has been... I am grateful!
>
> I still have those headaches, but we are thinking
> now that it is allergies. Not another "pill"!
> LOL.
>
> Please keep on posting. Reading is SO encouraging to me, and I feel like I've known
> some of you for a very long time! Thanks again.
>
Hi pumpkin, I am so happy for you!!!!!!!
WAYNE
Posted by leeran on May 12, 2003, at 19:47:47
In reply to SCARED TO DEATH!!!!!!!, posted by blkvettes on March 7, 2003, at 10:15:24
Blkvettes,
Hi there!
I was just looking up the words following words on the internet ("muscle" "spasm" "Lexapro") and a link to one of your posts popped up on Google.
On March 7, 2003 you stated the following:
"I am tired of these muscles spasms, muscle pains, chest pains etc."
It sounds like you almost felt like you were experiencing a heart attack with this medicine at one point - right?
I'm sitting here becoming more and more agitated about this - which is probably making the sensation even worse (tightening of what I guess is the chest wall/pectoral muscle but started out as a lot of discomfort in the back of the neck).
Did you just wait these symptoms out? I'm assuming they eventually wane (hey, isn't your name Wayne?).
Thanks, in advance, for anything you might be able to confirm.
Best,
Lee
P.S. Somehow, it always comes back to www.dr-bob.org. No wonder so many of us end up congregating here - this is the publisher's clearinghouse for psychopharmacological inquiries!
Posted by blkvettes on May 12, 2003, at 19:53:57
In reply to Re: SCARED TO DEATH!!!!!!! » blkvettes, posted by leeran on May 12, 2003, at 19:42:27
> Blkvettes,
>
> Hi there!
>
> I was just looking up the words following words on the internet ("muscle" "spasm" "Lexapro") and a link to one of your posts popped up on Google.
>
> On March 7, 2003 you stated the following:
>
> "I am tired of these muscles spasms, muscle pains, chest pains etc."
>
> It sounds like you almost felt like you were experiencing a heart attack with this medicine at one point - right?
>
> I'm sitting here becoming more and more agitated about this - which is probably making the sensation even worse (tightening of what I guess is the chest wall/pectoral muscle but started out as a lot of discomfort in the back of the neck).
>
> Did you just wait these symptoms out? I'm assuming they eventually wane (hey, isn't your name Wayne?).
>
> Thanks, in advance, for anything you might be able to confirm.
>
> Best,
>
> Lee
>
>
>Hi Lee, yes the name is Wayne. Did that post come from this board or another board. I go on about 7 boards. But I think that may be describing my anxiety and panic attack symptoms. I had all those before lexapro. I felt like I was having heart attacks way before lexapro!!!! Neck pain is common with lexapro on this board!!!! I still get spasms where you are talking about. But if I feel them on the surface and not under bone, I ignore them. I hope this helps and makes sense. TAKE CARE!!!!
WAYNE
Posted by blkvettes on May 12, 2003, at 20:11:02
In reply to Re: SCARED TO DEATH!!!!!!!, posted by blkvettes on May 12, 2003, at 19:53:57
Hi Lee, is this the post below!!!! I remember that day and night!!!! I think it had more to do with anxiety and panic more than anything!!!!! Gosh I hate reading that crap again!!!!
WAYNESCARED TO DEATH!!!!!!!
Posted by blkvettes on March 7, 2003, at 10:15:24In reply to Re: TEETH CLENCHING JAW CLENCHING?, posted by Tigger on March 7, 2003, at 8:11:42
Things were going pretty good until yesterday. Layed down to relax during the afternoon and fell asleep. I awoke to a flash going up and down my body. It happened so quick dont know if it was hot or cold. Of course this scared me, have not had anything like this in awhile. I get up and have what feels like heartburn and lump in my throat and chest hurts. Cant be heart trouble my heart has been checked many times. This goes on until nightime and I puke my guts out. I go to sleep and wake up every hour. I get up take a nexium and back to taking LEX in the morning. Took it at night for 6 days and sleep got worse. Take it during the day and I turn into a zombie. So we shall see what happens this time. I am tired of these muscles spasms, muscle pains, chest pains etc. One week on 5mg and 3 weeks on 7.5 or 10. I am so frustrated right now, this 1 bad day has wrecked confidence. I dont know whats physical and whats mental anymore. I have gotten some results but just dont know!!!!!!!!
Posted by leeran on May 12, 2003, at 21:24:43
In reply to Re: leeran and lexapro, posted by blkvettes on May 12, 2003, at 20:11:02
Blkvettes,
I'm so sorry to bring up a bad time (old post) for you! Please accept my apologies!
Believe me, an hour or so ago (when I found that link via Google) your post gave me some much-needed peace of mind! I was sitting here wondering if I was having a heart attack and reading your account helped me calm down a bit.
So, my apology is laced with a very sincere thank you!
Lee
Posted by blkvettes on May 12, 2003, at 21:35:43
In reply to Re: leeran and lexapro, posted by leeran on May 12, 2003, at 21:24:43
> Blkvettes,
>
> I'm so sorry to bring up a bad time (old post) for you! Please accept my apologies!
>
> Believe me, an hour or so ago (when I found that link via Google) your post gave me some much-needed peace of mind! I was sitting here wondering if I was having a heart attack and reading your account helped me calm down a bit.
>
> So, my apology is laced with a very sincere thank you!
>
> Lee
>
>Hey Lee, dont be silly!!!!!! No apology is needed!!!!!! I will go back and look at every post if it will help someone. It did make me realize how far I have come. I should maybe go back and read every one!!!!! I know you have said you did that. I just hope you feel better and put that worry behind you. If I can help you in any way please tell me!!!! GOD BLESS YOU!!!!!
WAYNE
Posted by oldhand on May 12, 2003, at 22:55:59
In reply to How does Lexapro affect sleep, posted by shoff on May 10, 2003, at 2:08:17
> I started Lexapro a few days ago (no real effect yet) and my sleep patterns seems to be terrible since. Is this a common side effect?
My experience with Lexapro is that it interferes with my sleep. It was worse at first and doc gave me Trazodone for bedtime. I contunue on 10 mg. of Lexapro but have cut from 100mg to 75 mg of the Trazodone as I seem to want to sleep in alot. (I have always been a night person and always love to sleep late.) Have been on Lexapro for seven months and it has helped alot.
For all you newbies, hang in there and give it the best try you can.
Posted by oldhand on May 12, 2003, at 23:13:32
In reply to Re: New to Lexapro and feeling awful, posted by under the weather on May 11, 2003, at 1:02:03
> I'm new to all this and don't know that I understand everything said, but depression runs in my family and so I think that would be chemical. I just started lex 3 days ago, noticed a lot of yawning during the day, and now I'm up at 12am, alert with nausea. Was on Wellbutrin but had severe head aches. Has anyone come off of lex and not had to start something new? I expect this to be a "get me balanced again" thing and then let my body take over, but I'm hearing a lot of what sounds like long term meds talk. I'd like to hear your thoughts on this. Also, I'm newly hyper thyroid and wondering how this depression may be related. Any comments?
If I am not mistaken, thyroid problems can include depression. If memory serves, my docs did a battery of thyroid tests to rule out a disorder of that type before prescribing anti-depressants. So which came first for you, the depression or the thyroid problems?
In terms of a balance and then letting your body take over, I am not one of those lucky folks who have been able to do that. I guess that those who can are not posting here to let us know, either. Wish we could hear from some of them.
Best wishes and keep us posted.
Posted by leeran on May 13, 2003, at 1:37:21
In reply to Re: leeran and lexapro, posted by blkvettes on May 12, 2003, at 21:35:43
Thanks Wayne!
I was feeling so odd earlier today when I posted that message. I really think it's the Lexapro chest clenching phenomenon. Actually, this evening it seems to be around my left jaw as well (which, as I recall, is even more common).
The dermatologist has recently added Spironolactone to the mix, so I suddenly found myself feeling more than a bit paranoid that everything I'm taking was resulting in one big late afternoon cardiac arrest. Plus, my husband is leaving tomorrow for two days for work - and I always feel stressed out when one of my two "guys" (son or hub) are out of town.
Thanks for your words of encouragement. You are SO HELPFUL on this board.
Best regards (and YOU take care :-)
Lee
Posted by blkvettes on May 13, 2003, at 2:18:17
In reply to Re: leeran and lexapro » blkvettes, posted by leeran on May 13, 2003, at 1:37:21
> Thanks Wayne!
>
> I was feeling so odd earlier today when I posted that message. I really think it's the Lexapro chest clenching phenomenon. Actually, this evening it seems to be around my left jaw as well (which, as I recall, is even more common).
>
> The dermatologist has recently added Spironolactone to the mix, so I suddenly found myself feeling more than a bit paranoid that everything I'm taking was resulting in one big late afternoon cardiac arrest. Plus, my husband is leaving tomorrow for two days for work - and I always feel stressed out when one of my two "guys" (son or hub) are out of town.
>
> Thanks for your words of encouragement. You are SO HELPFUL on this board.
>
> Best regards (and YOU take care :-)
>
> LeeHi Lee, as you always hear the side effects go away in time. But for peace of mind never fear going to a doctor and having your heart checked!!! Its always a good thing to have a complete physical when you reach a certain age anyway!!!! It could be some anxiety because you fear a problem. Do you constantly rub that area until it is sore. If you do you might get some aspercream. It does not irritate the skin. I am so use to spasms and pains I just ignore them anymore. But I know how you feel and its hard to do!!!!! Hang in there we can all do this!!!! TAKE CARE!!!!!
WAYNE
>
>
Posted by leeran on May 13, 2003, at 3:22:33
In reply to Re: leeran and lexapro, posted by blkvettes on May 13, 2003, at 2:18:17
Aspercream! Yes, I do have a tube of that upstairs (along with two tubes of Theragesic).
I thought I was possibly having a heart attack last fall and drove myself to the hospital (first time I've ever done such a thing) and felt thoroughly foolish as I sat there waiting for the test results, painting my nails and cleaning out my purse. All the tests came back normal and later that day I had a stress test - which they recommended at the hospital. I passed it with flying colors.
I was doing Bill Phillips' Body for Life program at the time, and I think I must have strained those muscles doing pullovers on a weight bench - BUT - because I have a slightly leaky heart valve (which may or may not be due to a short run on the phen/fen combination) I felt like I should acknowledge the pain and have it checked out.
I think today was probably a Lexapro moment . . . (or series of moments). Typically I feel very nervous before one of us travels, but it just occurred to me, maybe the Lexapro is helping a lot of that anxiety that I usually feel mentally (it's like I know I should be very anxious - and I feel it somewhat, but not in my usual "chicken with its head cut off" manner).
Aspercream is a good idea. Thank you once again, Blkvettes/Wayne. The fact that you (and so many others) still post your experiences/suggestions for the newcomers is so kindhearted.
Lee
Posted by blkvettes on May 13, 2003, at 10:19:44
In reply to Re: leeran and lexapro » blkvettes, posted by leeran on May 13, 2003, at 3:22:33
> Aspercream! Yes, I do have a tube of that upstairs (along with two tubes of Theragesic).
>
> I thought I was possibly having a heart attack last fall and drove myself to the hospital (first time I've ever done such a thing) and felt thoroughly foolish as I sat there waiting for the test results, painting my nails and cleaning out my purse. All the tests came back normal and later that day I had a stress test - which they recommended at the hospital. I passed it with flying colors.
>
> I was doing Bill Phillips' Body for Life program at the time, and I think I must have strained those muscles doing pullovers on a weight bench - BUT - because I have a slightly leaky heart valve (which may or may not be due to a short run on the phen/fen combination) I felt like I should acknowledge the pain and have it checked out.
>
> I think today was probably a Lexapro moment . . . (or series of moments). Typically I feel very nervous before one of us travels, but it just occurred to me, maybe the Lexapro is helping a lot of that anxiety that I usually feel mentally (it's like I know I should be very anxious - and I feel it somewhat, but not in my usual "chicken with its head cut off" manner).
>
> Aspercream is a good idea. Thank you once again, Blkvettes/Wayne. The fact that you (and so many others) still post your experiences/suggestions for the newcomers is so kindhearted.
>
> Lee
>
>
Hi Lee, are you being treated for depression or a combination of things. Do you also have anxiety issues!!!!!!!! I have always had insomnia since a kid and notice you are up late on this board. Do you suffer with insomnia also. I am a very curious person, sorry for all the questions. Yes, I still post and always will till I die. But my life is not perfect right now. I am still early in this recovery. I dont know if things get better from here or worse. So I keep reading and learning about myself. I have even considered getting something for my insomnia. I used to do drugs years ago and went through a rehab center. I have been drug free for almost 20 years. Its funny that I have a mental illness and all my drug buddies and gals from years past are fine. Just does not seem fair somehow. I know I have come a long way in the last 3 months. Now I am to the point where I have to make decisions in my life. These decisions are very hard!!!!! I still have bad days, but I think they are more of a normal kind of bad day. But all of us instantly blame it on our illness or our med. I had bad days before this illness and did not think twice about them. Sorry to make this so long but I just woke up and your post was the first thing I read. So I had to get my thoughts out of my head. I also have a bad problem about thinking of everyone on the boards I go to. Like you for instance you talked about an old post of mine. I know you were a little scared. I picture this in my mind and feel I have to try to help any way I can. I try to calm your fears and at the same time ask you to see a doc which you have done in the past. I to have had all the heart tests. I did not like that stress test though, I thought I was heading for a heart attack during that. But they said everything appeared normal. No blockage anywhere!!! So I have trained myself to ignore almost all my pains and spasms. But sometimes if my mind is tired, the symptoms get the best of me. By reading your posts in the past, I have come to think of you as a really cool person. You post what you think and I am sure you know which ones I am reffering to. Well, I am off for a nap!!!!! I hope things keep getting better you and all of us. Just remember you are still going to have days that your depressed. This is normal day living and dont let it get you down!!!! Just for lil jimi I am sending you a special TAKE CARE!!!!!!!
WAYNE
Posted by oregon on May 13, 2003, at 11:55:27
In reply to Re: New to Lexapro and feeling awful » Curlena, posted by leeran on May 9, 2003, at 9:28:43
This site is great, it gives me the information about side effects I am experiencing. I have a brain injury from work I was taking 450 of wellbutrine. Since 2000 I was experiencing a deep depression never hospitalized but I probably should have, as I came very close to taking my life.I started Lexapro 3-4 weeks ago, my Dr. wanted me to start at .5 but I started at 10. I told her last week ~I went up to 20, I feel its begining to work. Last week when I saw her I told her I wanted to go off the Wellbutrine, she asked me why I said I didn't want that many pills.She asked that I stay on it for the next couple of months.
The side effects are nothing compared to the blackness of depression. If I never have an orgasm again so be it atleast I will be living a somewhat normal life.
Thank you everyone for the valuable imput!
Sharon
Posted by lil' jimi on May 13, 2003, at 12:00:24
In reply to Re: leeran and lexapro, posted by blkvettes on May 13, 2003, at 10:19:44
Posted by worrywort on May 13, 2003, at 12:43:06
In reply to New to Lexapro and feeling awful, posted by jjana on May 8, 2003, at 13:42:39
Hi Jana,
Ive been taking Lex for almost 7 months now. I started at 10mg then went to 20mg. One thing you must remember is that it takes WEEKS to feel the full effects of most, if not all, SSRIs. It took about 5 weeks for me. In most cases the side effects will decrease with time. You have to try to stay with it, I know thats easy for me to say, but its true. I had a very tough time believing it myself. The fact that you are having more anxiety now that you are on Lex could be a good sign, indicating that your depression is being lessened. I had lots of anx too. Ask your pdoc about a tranq like Lorazepam (Ativan). I took Loraz 0.5mg (the smallest dose)3x/day for several months and it worked wonders. I had very little drowsiness. Eventually, I was able to cut back the number of doses and now I dont take it at all. Try to stay positive and try not to take some of the horror stories you read on this board too seriously (no offense to anyone) everyone is different. I have had EXCELLENT results with Lex, and little if any side effects. You must be patient, that is the most difficult thing to do. Remember, you WILL feel better, but it WILL take time. Hang in there! Think positive! feel free to contact me off list if you wish just to talk (e.davidson@mchsi.com) ...it can really help to talk to someone who has been there...it sure helped me...dont forget to smile!!!!
Eric
Posted by blkvettes on May 13, 2003, at 13:40:47
In reply to Re: New to Lexapro and feeling awful, posted by oregon on May 13, 2003, at 11:55:27
> This site is great, it gives me the information about side effects I am experiencing. I have a brain injury from work I was taking 450 of wellbutrine. Since 2000 I was experiencing a deep depression never hospitalized but I probably should have, as I came very close to taking my life.I started Lexapro 3-4 weeks ago, my Dr. wanted me to start at .5 but I started at 10. I told her last week ~I went up to 20, I feel its begining to work. Last week when I saw her I told her I wanted to go off the Wellbutrine, she asked me why I said I didn't want that many pills.She asked that I stay on it for the next couple of months.
> The side effects are nothing compared to the blackness of depression. If I never have an orgasm again so be it atleast I will be living a somewhat normal life.
> Thank you everyone for the valuable imput!
> Sharon
Hi Sharon, it sounds very good to me!!!! You seem upbeat!!!!! I am happy for you!!!!!! Just dont try to do to much at one time!!!! GOD BLESS!!!!!
WAYNE
Posted by leeran on May 13, 2003, at 13:49:11
In reply to Re: leeran and lexapro, posted by blkvettes on May 13, 2003, at 10:19:44
To Blkvettes,
(the easiest way for me to do this is copy and paste your post and respond as I go).
"Hi Lee, are you being treated for depression or a combination of things."
ADD (which I think has been exacerbated by early menopause, the bane of my existence) and depression. The psychiatrist has mentioned that Lexapro might help me with my OCD tendencies - so my guess is that he has that acronym written somewhere in my chart. In general, I am very anxious and have lived my life waiting for the "other shoe to drop." So yes, I suppose there are a variety of issues but I've never asked for my official diagnosis. That might throw me into the real depths of despair (lol - kind of :-)
"Do you also have anxiety issues!!!!!!!!"
Yes . . . it seems to run in the family. As my mother is wont to say: "The nut doesn't fall far from the tree" - even though I've tried to roll as far away as I could get without dropping into the Pacific ocean! I love my mother but have a hard time trusting her (that's fodder for another board).
"I have always had insomnia since a kid and notice you are up late on this board. Do you suffer with insomnia also."
Yes, I suppose I do. But not when I take my Ambien on time! Once I fall asleep (with the Ambien) I'm out like a light (this post is full of cliches - add anal-retentive to the list because I just spent five minutes trying to figure out how to add the accent mark to the word cliche).
Back to insomnia . . .
Ambien seems to be doing the trick for now (I've been taking it for about three weeks). Oh yeah, I'm on the West Coast, so it may seem like I'm up even later than I really am (but last night was definitely later than I intended). I think I also have whatever condition it is that causes someone to overexplain . . . (OCD? Narcissism? Who knows).
"I am a very curious person, sorry for all the questions."
As am I. I've been told that by many people over the years (a friend used to call me Mrs. Columbo). It seems that there are many inquisitive people on these boards who are very cognizant of their mental health and find this board via research on their medication or condition. I'm amazed at how many times www.dr-bob.org comes up during different Google searches!
"Yes, I still post and always will till I die."
That's really nice of you to continue posting here . . . it reminds me of the principles put forth in that movie "Pay It Forward."
"But my life is not perfect right now."
I am sorry to hear that, Blkvettes.
"I am still early in this recovery. I dont know if things get better from here or worse. So I keep reading and learning about myself."
This sounds like the road to recovery/self-discovery and I can't imagine that it could be anything but good for you. I think that once one experiences depression (or any type of mood disorder/mental illness) there's the fear of slipping backwards. I know I feel it quite often, yet I sabotage myself from time to time (mainly by thinking I shouldn't need medication).
Example: this morning I sat in the parking lot at Whole Foods Market and agonized over the thought of all the medications I'm taking.
I consistently struggle between:
(a) thinking I should be able to handle anything on my own
(b) the certainty that there must be some magic combination of prescription drugs that can do the trick
(b) wondering if my qi isn't out of balance and I'm harming myself further with prescription medications
I'm just new age enough to be a pain in the b*tt to myself - but not new age enough to eat right, etc. This nebulous belief system is probably the result of a few rounds of acupuncture treatments and several months with a chiropractor/kinesiologist who thought he could solve every "ill" (including menopause) with three time-consuming visits per week and "waving" things over me (namely, the natural remedies he sold at his practice).
Usually it's a combination of several "cures" that finally gets me back on track - but, undoubtedly, anti-depressants go further than any other in getting me over the hump. However, last Fall the acupuncturist "prescribed" this nasty stuff (tree stumps, deer horns, berries, etc.) that I had to boil and drink the remaining liquid. That stuff really seemed to help with depression, acne, anxiety, hair loss - but it just about drove my son and husband out of the kitchen.
"I have even considered getting something for my insomnia."
I've heard that Ambien is non-addicting, yet I've also heard that it IS addicting. I have never taken a sleeping medication (save for melatonin and Tylenol P.M.) in my entire life. For some reason, I've always equated taking sleeping pills with really hitting rock bottom. Isn't that weird? Must go back to some sixties "Valley of the Dolls" mentality.
"I used to do drugs years ago and went through a rehab center. I have been drug free for almost 20 years."
CONGRATULATIONS!!! What an accomplishment! I'm sure it hasn't always been easy during those twenty years - but the fact that you have made it shows that you have an extraordinary amount of srength and resolve (as well as belief in yourself!).
"Its funny that I have a mental illness and all my drug buddies and gals from years past are fine. Just does not seem fair somehow."
I understand your feelings, but in a slightly different way. My husband is so organized and good at everything he does and my business partner of twenty years is the same way. I spend so much time beating myself up and wondering why I can't attain that same level of drive and organization (of course, fewer posts on this board would help!). I used to have the drive (actually overdrive) but never the organization.
Regarding your buddies from the old days - maybe they have gone through similar situations as well, but haven't told anyone outside their immediate family? You never know.
"I know I have come a long way in the last 3 months."
Amen. That one day spent reading your posts from start to finish was like watching "The Incredible Journey" in fast forward.
"Now I am to the point where I have to make decisions in my life. These decisions are very hard!!!!!"
Blkvettes, I have had to make four enormously difficult decisions in my adult life.
Decisions that have a major impact on the future, and your loved ones, can be gut-wrenching. With the exception of one of those decisions, there isn't a day that goes by that I don't wonder if I made the right choices (note: I DO know that every blunder got me where I am this very minute - and when I think of it that way, I know I am in a much better place, but I'm one of those people who becomes ensared in guilty feelings about everything going back to first grade).
Regarding the decisions on your horizon: I strongly believe that, in order to make these life-altering decisions, one needs to be mentally/physically ready for all the work that goes into these changes (there were times I wasn't and I've paid the price in cortisol depletion).
From reading your posts I can see that you have gone the distance with your depression. I can also see/read that you are much stronger than you were three months ago. The combination of insight, honesty, and compassion you always exhibit here leads me to believe that you will know when it's the right time to tackle these tough decisions.
"I still have bad days, but I think they are more of a normal kind of bad day. But all of us instantly blame it on our illness or our med. I had bad days before this illness and did not think twice about them."
Yes, I agree. I don't know if I'm recalling your age correctly (43?) but let's face it, the simple act of aging can take its toll (I'm 44 but in denial and I have the receipts to prove it :-).
"Sorry to make this so long but I just woke up and your post was the first thing I read. So I had to get my thoughts out of my head. I also have a bad problem about thinking of everyone on the boards I go to. Like you for instance you talked about an old post of mine. I know you were a little scared. I picture this in my mind and feel I have to try to help any way I can. I try to calm your fears and at the same time ask you to see a doc which you have done in the past. I to have had all the heart tests. I did not like that stress test though, I thought I was heading for a heart attack during that. But they said everything appeared normal. No blockage anywhere!!! So I have trained myself to ignore almost all my pains and spasms. But sometimes if my mind is tired, the symptoms get the best of me."I agree with just about everything you said in this paragraph, Blkvettes (including the fact that my own response is quite long).
Because I work at home (and I don't do much of that these days - all things considered) I have found the internet to be my lifeline to the outside world. One of my closest confidantes is a woman I got to know on another board (different subject matter not related to this site), yet we've never met. Additionally, I met my husband on the internet, so I can relate to feeling a bond and empathy with the disembodied souls whose paths we cross electronically.
"By reading your posts in the past, I have come to think of you as a really cool person."I live in an area that does its best to try to "define" COOL (in the visual sense) so at forty four, I usually feel more like a FOOL around here (hmmmm, did I mention agoraphobia? Or as my husband calls it - angoraphobia?). In any case, I will definitely accept and embrace your kind compliment of "cool" in the virtual cybersense of the word.
"You post what you think and I am sure you know which ones I am reffering to."
Well, I've posted about nearly every facet of my oftimes seedy life between here and the social board (where this might get redirected - despite my discussion of Ambien), so I'm not sure which posts you're referring to (perhaps my continual banner girl plugs for the Magic Wand?). You don't need to answer on this one, I've beat that dead horse to a pulp.
"Well, I am off for a nap!!!!!"
Have a good one - and perhaps ask your doctor about a sleep aid. And thanks for your post (from one "Lexy's Midnight Runner" to another!
Lee
Posted by billk on May 13, 2003, at 15:14:06
In reply to Anyone switched to Lexapro? « ggrrl, posted by Dr. Bob on June 11, 2002, at 7:52:48
Now that this thread has been going for almost a year now, I wonder if there is any consensus as to whether Lexapro is better than Celexa, in particular in regards to side effects, or whether Lexapro has been simply a clever marketing ploy?
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