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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 57 to 81 of 105. Go back in thread:
Posted by gardenergirl on February 3, 2006, at 2:49:20
In reply to Re: Someone Said Not To Use Fondly Anymore » gardenergirl, posted by justyourlaugh on February 3, 2006, at 1:44:58
> you are kidding are you not..
> "out"..i was never inWhat I meant was, why did you choose to disclose publically that you sent the email?
I'm sorry you're hurting about it now. Although I do also wonder what prompted the email in the first place, but I suppose that's between you and Phillipa.
This too shall pass.
gg
Posted by ClearSkies on February 3, 2006, at 8:05:21
In reply to Someone Said Not To Use Fondly Anymore, posted by Phillipa on January 30, 2006, at 14:03:16
I just wonder if people's responses to Phillipa's request for opinions might be rephrased if they knew that JYL, who sent her the email, was a babbler from way back and a long time member of this community.
Suggesting that she be deleted from an email list, or needs to use a dictionary, strikes me as comments that would certainly make me feel hurt, if I was JYL.
Asking the question: if it was YOU reading the comments about yourself with regard to Phillipa's original post, how would you feel?
ClearSkies
Posted by wildcard11 on February 3, 2006, at 10:29:20
In reply to Re: Someone Said Not To Use Fondly Anymore » Phillipa, posted by justyourlaugh on February 3, 2006, at 1:09:30
YOU made it public YOU sent that email, NOT HER so as far as anyone knew, it was hypothetical. She worries 24/7 what people think and honestly thought she may be coming off in a way she did not want too.
Posted by Dinah on February 3, 2006, at 10:46:14
In reply to I think you need to back off!!! » justyourlaugh, posted by wildcard11 on February 3, 2006, at 10:29:20
And remember the civility guidelines? I statements?
I realize there is a lot of hurt all around, but that's not going to be helped by administrative actions being required.
Posted by Gabbix2 on February 3, 2006, at 10:57:59
In reply to Some thoughts about this thread, posted by ClearSkies on February 3, 2006, at 8:05:21
I'm really sorry this happened to you *Really* sorry.
I'd be angry as hell and hurt too.
Posted by Gabbix2 on February 3, 2006, at 10:59:20
In reply to JYL » ClearSkies, posted by Gabbix2 on February 3, 2006, at 10:57:59
Posted by Gabbix2 on February 3, 2006, at 11:01:49
In reply to I think you need to back off!!! » justyourlaugh, posted by wildcard11 on February 3, 2006, at 10:29:20
Î think I may have been tempted to do the same thing if I saw that something had been taken out of context and then others were accusing me of being mean spirited and suggest that it go to "Dr. Bob"
We all worry about what other people think, but knowing that another babbler is going to see the question posted before it was brought to their own attention would feel like betrayal to me.
Posted by Dinah on February 3, 2006, at 11:19:18
In reply to Re: I think you need to back off!!! » wildcard11, posted by Gabbix2 on February 3, 2006, at 11:01:49
> I think you need to back off!!!
I understand that you're trying to be supportive to Phillipa, and that's great. But please be careful not to be nonsupportive to other babblers while doing so.
> Î think I may have been tempted to do the same thing if I saw that something had been taken out of context and then others were accusing me of being mean spirited and suggest that it go to "Dr. Bob"
Gabbi, I understand that you're being supportive to JYL, and that's great. But please don't jump to conclusions about whether something has been taken out of context since only two people presumably know the context.
Also, could everyone remember to change the subject line if they reply to a subject line that has been deemed unsupportive?
Dinah, acting as deputy for Dr. Bob.
If you or others have questions about this or about posting policies in general, or are interested in alternative ways of expressing yourself, please see the FAQ:
http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/faq.html#civil
Follow-ups regarding these issues should be redirected to Psycho-Babble Administration. They, as well as replies to the above post, should of course themselves be civil.
Dr. Bob is always free to override deputy decisions, and if you wish, you may appeal all deputy actions to him.
Posted by crazy teresa on February 3, 2006, at 11:22:01
In reply to Re: Delete this person from your email immediately! » crazy teresa, posted by justyourlaugh on February 3, 2006, at 1:23:58
My response was to what I saw as an attack on Jan; this was my perception of her feelings from the original post.
I had no idea this involved any one else on PB; I have always been under the impression when things of this nature were brough to the attention of the entire group, we defended one another from the outside world. (Like the Tom Cruise postings.)
I assumed this was the case, once again. And I truly believe this was the case for everyone who read the post, especially true of those who posted responses!
But of course we know what is said about what happens when we assume... And I feel the saying was certainly proven true in my instance.
And now you're hurt, and I'm pissed because I feel sucked in. I come here to get away from this sort of thing, because it happens all too often IRL. And my life is too complicated and painful to add more of this kind of thing to it. But this in not about me.
I hope this gets straightened out between the 2 of you, ASAP. I know you're both hurting, and I'm very sorry.
Sincerely,
Teresa
Posted by Phillipa on February 3, 2006, at 11:27:31
In reply to Fan-freaking-tastic! » justyourlaugh, posted by crazy teresa on February 3, 2006, at 11:22:01
What in the world is going on? No ill intent was ever intended and certainly not to hurt another poster. All I can do is say that I am truly sorry again. I certainly didn't intend to cause problems. I thought it was only a general question and wanted to know what others thought of the word. Don't know what else to say. So I guess I better not say anymore. Fondly, Phillipa
Posted by wildcard11 on February 3, 2006, at 11:33:05
In reply to Please be supportive - Wildcard and » Gabbix2, posted by Dinah on February 3, 2006, at 11:19:18
This is between you and Phillipa who is a good friend to me and has said only good things about you. I reacted harshly towards you out of the hurt for my friend and then took a step back and realized that you are hurt too. I truly hope this can be resolved and again I am sorry my temper got the best of me. This seems to be a HUGE misunderstanding between JYL and Phillipa and I truly hope it can be resolved.
Posted by crazy teresa on February 3, 2006, at 11:33:27
In reply to Re: Fan-freaking-tastic!, posted by Phillipa on February 3, 2006, at 11:27:31
Hey, JFP, I don't think this happened on purpose. It just happened.
Let's just fix it. What can we do to fix it? Anybody?
Posted by Phillipa on February 3, 2006, at 11:35:51
In reply to Re: Fan-freaking-tastic! » Phillipa, posted by crazy teresa on February 3, 2006, at 11:33:27
I've apologized what else can I do????? Fondly, Phillipa
Posted by wildcard11 on February 3, 2006, at 11:45:14
In reply to Re: I think you need to back off!!! » wildcard11, posted by Gabbix2 on February 3, 2006, at 11:01:49
I understand how JYL could feel betrayed as some people would but to my knowledge, Phillipa was under the impression that JYL no longer visited the site and was worried that *Fondly* may appear inappropriate by others also. The instant she found out that JYL had read the post, she emailed her trying to work things out which was unsuccessful. This is a big mess and i don't like anyone hurting so i hope this can be resolved.
Posted by wildcard11 on February 3, 2006, at 11:47:56
In reply to Re: Fan-freaking-tastic! » crazy teresa, posted by Phillipa on February 3, 2006, at 11:35:51
Posted by Phillipa on February 3, 2006, at 11:50:11
In reply to New thread name » Gabbix2, posted by wildcard11 on February 3, 2006, at 11:45:14
Wildcard is right that's what I did but I was told not to E-mail her again. What to do? I just don't know. Fondly, Phillipa
Posted by Gabbix2 on February 3, 2006, at 12:55:54
In reply to New thread name » Gabbix2, posted by wildcard11 on February 3, 2006, at 11:45:14
I guess, under the same circumstances I would have just asked if anyone was bothered by my use of the word, rather than say someone e-mailed me and told me they didn't like it. It doesn't seem like much a difference, but the other sounds a bit more personal, I guess.
I think quite a few of us have a policy of what is said off the board, stays off the board, and that can help quite a bit.
Posted by Gabbix2 on February 3, 2006, at 12:57:45
In reply to New thread name » Gabbix2, posted by wildcard11 on February 3, 2006, at 11:45:14
. This is a big mess and i don't like anyone hurting so i hope this can be resolved.
Me too : )
Posted by nout on February 3, 2006, at 13:19:34
In reply to Re: Fan-freaking-tastic! » Phillipa, posted by crazy teresa on February 3, 2006, at 11:33:27
I don't beleive it! Talk about mole-hills to mountains ! lol (don't mean to offend the mole or the mountain)Who else would be aware of the term "Fondly" EXCEPT a fellow Babbler. Besides, we were asking opinions about it's meaning, we were not personally attacking Anyone. Does it matter who said what to form an opinion, I hate to think the politics are so bad that we have to dance on egg shells. I am definetly going to "lurk" for my own saftey because wishy-washy fence sitters can jump either way. Be strong and stand behind your opinion or don't say something you don't mean. Poor Phillipa, being in such good company just to be turned on totally unnecessarily. Hey, at least she got some activity going!
Posted by muffled on February 3, 2006, at 14:03:03
In reply to muff here's a hug for no real reason » muffled, posted by alesta on January 31, 2006, at 15:13:24
> hi muffled!! i just wanted to return the favor and give you a BIG hug (you gave me one a while ago at a time when i was particularly fragile:))((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((muffy)))))))))))))
>
> i was seriously worried about you when you got blocked.
>
> aim:)***Hey, just found this post, made me smile and feel good it did!!!THX! :-)
Muffled
Posted by crazy teresa on February 3, 2006, at 14:41:51
In reply to Whats to fix? » crazy teresa, posted by nout on February 3, 2006, at 13:19:34
I didn't say anything I regret. I was sorry feelings got hurt.
Posted by Gabbix2 on February 3, 2006, at 14:55:27
In reply to Whats to fix? » crazy teresa, posted by nout on February 3, 2006, at 13:19:34
> I don't beleive it! Talk about mole-hills to mountains ! lol (don't mean to offend the mole or the mountain)Who else would be aware of the term "Fondly" EXCEPT a fellow Babbler.
***** quite possibly anyone else she writes to, on paper , or via e-mail..
Besides, we were asking opinions about it's meaning, we were not personally attacking Anyone.
***Saying something sounds gratuitously mean spirited isn't personal?
I am definetly going to "lurk" for my own saftey because wishy-washy fence sitters can jump either way. Be strong and stand behind your opinion or
**just post under different name?
Posted by lynn971 on February 3, 2006, at 16:02:41
In reply to Re: Whats to fix? » nout, posted by crazy teresa on February 3, 2006, at 14:41:51
Phillipa,
You are one of the sweetest people I know. I also know that you would never do anything to hurt someone on purpose.
I do know that you sincerely was curious about if Fondly Phillipa was condensending. I also know that if you felt that it was condensending you would change it in a heartbeat. I personally do not think it is condensending. I like it. It is actually refreshing.
YOu did not do anything wrong. I know your heart.'
Love,
Lynn
Posted by lynn971 on February 3, 2006, at 16:09:57
In reply to Someone Said Not To Use Fondly Anymore, posted by Phillipa on January 30, 2006, at 14:03:16
I want to start off by saying that I do not think that you are a bad person. Please do not be sad.
Many people got defensive on behalf of Phillipa because we have sort of become a family and we don't want anyone hurting a "family" member.
If other babblers knew that you were the one who emailed Phillipa, I don't think that they would have taken it as bad because you are a member of the "family"
For all we know it could have been someone who doesnt post anymore or someone who we dont really know because they do not post often.
I keep getting strange emails myself.
I really dont think that the people here are against you.
Luv ya,
Lynn
Posted by nout on February 3, 2006, at 16:36:59
In reply to Re: Whats to fix? » nout, posted by Gabbix2 on February 3, 2006, at 14:55:27
**just post under different name?
Are you advocating violating the rules; or are you insinuating that I have already done so?
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