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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 19 of 19. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by just plain jane on November 13, 2004, at 20:06:47
that you have difficulties, emotional/mental illness?
I've been set apart from my age peers, my work peers, my social peers all my life as "weird". Not because I act inappropriately, because, although I can act nutty, I am in control of my behavior. But because my behavior is simple and plain, no hidden agendas, I'm forthright, honest, and kinda like Forrest Gump, except that I think he was retarded a bit and I am way out there in the other direction. Which, in itself, has often been the cause of weirdness just because I am hyperanalytical and hmmmmm.... I pondered here recently about whether the mind expanding drugs I took in absurd amounts in my youth could have altered my mind for real, physically or chemically, and then there's the mind-expanding aspect which, once experienced is not forgotten, at least not for me.
GYAD!!!
Posted by just plain jane on November 13, 2004, at 20:19:46
In reply to I wonder, what is it like to not have people know, posted by just plain jane on November 13, 2004, at 20:06:47
OK, so, maybe, by their standards, with all their "normal" social interactions (games) and spiteful, mean, whatever the heII it is that "regular" people do in their socialization that I don't that makes them think I'm weird, really makes me weird. But then, that would be only in their estimation, because I think that it's weird that people can be shallow, basically dishonest, intentionally insulting and hurtful, jealous, spiteful, vengeful... on and on til I puke from the hideousness of it.
I wished, quite often, when I was a little kid, that I could just be normal, or even dumb. That I could not think about things so much, that I could just not care, like most everybody else, about anything, or anyone else, that it wouldn't hurt so much to see and hear others be hurt in any way, that the whole Viet Nam experience, for our country and theirs and Laos, Thailand, Cambodia, and surrounding affected areas, would not be happening because it was causing SO MUCH PAIN and I felt it and I still feel it along with everything else for the past 48 years.
Shyt, my dogs and puppies need me and I think I need them right about now.
Posted by jlynne on November 13, 2004, at 21:22:10
In reply to Re: I wonder, blah blah blah » just plain jane, posted by just plain jane on November 13, 2004, at 20:19:46
Just wanted to announce that I am running for president for the JJane Fan Club . . . what would life be without you, love?
Furthermore, here, before god and babble, I do fearlessly proclaim that you have my unequivocal permission to, without pause or trepidation, continue steadfastly BEING YOU!!
/\/\/\/\ celebrate jjanehood /\/\/\/\
. . . jlynne
Posted by verne on November 14, 2004, at 0:30:45
In reply to Re: I wonder, blah blah blah » just plain jane, posted by just plain jane on November 13, 2004, at 20:19:46
I'm wondering whether socializing is just selling oneself. How can I put the best possible "spin" on myself? And the gender games or romance are so much deception. "How can I Deceive You?"I think you are aware. It's a kind of awful awareness that can be painful. Don't let society's norms get you down.
verne
Posted by just plain jane on November 14, 2004, at 2:11:22
In reply to Thank god for Jane . . . » just plain jane, posted by jlynne on November 13, 2004, at 21:22:10
You're gonna have to have a damn good flashlight and spelunkin gear to find me way down here in the cave where I am hiding from the hoopla.
A teary thank you for your enthusiasm.
As you know, it is very difficult for me to accept compliments so I will probably hide here in the dark until I look like Gollum.
Posted by just plain jane on November 14, 2004, at 2:22:08
In reply to No Need to Adjust Your Set » just plain jane, posted by verne on November 14, 2004, at 0:30:45
that's from the intro to The Outer Limits...
OooooooooK, now I know where verne and I have met before (snickering snort)
Thank you for your support and input.
But why, pray tell, do you want me to spin around with guys named norm?
And, are you going to be the host on the "How Can I Deceive You" game show? The Bob Eubanks of the Twenty First Century. Just think how much fun you could have roasting the contestants.
Maybe Chuck Barris would back you on that.
Posted by AdaGrace on November 14, 2004, at 9:52:14
In reply to I wonder, what is it like to not have people know, posted by just plain jane on November 13, 2004, at 20:06:47
I have always been drawn to people who do not fit the "norm" of society. Perhaps that is because I don't feel I do either. In my youth, I was desparate to belong. Desparate to join in the "norm". Now with 40 heading for my front door like a train in a tunnel blaring it's horn, I wish I had been more forthright, I wish I had followed my own path, my own dreams, my own visions, for if I had, perhaps I would not be living with so many regrets. I envy those who have lived their lives the way THEY wanted to and said "To H*ll with Normal". I want to be like them, so I try to suround myself with them, hoping one day it will rub off on me.
Ada (stealing JPJ's way of signing posts) Grace
Posted by Susan47 on November 14, 2004, at 11:03:34
In reply to I wonder, what is it like to not have people know, posted by just plain jane on November 13, 2004, at 20:06:47
JustPlainJane ...
We're the people that others really like, in spite of the fact that sometimes we get called weird. I watch people a lot, and it's the ones who make faces behind others' backs and the ones who think they know everything and the ones who think they can communicate by making faces and being know-it-alls, who *seem* like they're smarter than us and have all the friends, but it's a true fact (in my weird mind, anyway) that the reason they seem like they have friends is that everyone's secretly afraid of their wickedness. We're all awesome, so there. And I mean that fromthe bottom of my weird little heart.
Posted by AuntieMel on November 15, 2004, at 10:20:50
In reply to I wonder, what is it like to not have people know, posted by just plain jane on November 13, 2004, at 20:06:47
Let's see....
You are worried because you are "different" because you haven't mastered shallowness??
Sorry, toots, but I think that makes you more well balanced and together than the rest. Maybe the wrong people are in therapy.
I know what you mean about the feeling. I never "fit in" either. No, wait, that is not true. When I was little (in a large city) *I* was the cool one because I didn't just join in on every mundane thing the others did. It was only after moving to a small town that I experienced the pack mentality. There was no way in <hades?> that I would ever fit with that group no matter how I tried. It took a long time to accept that, but once I did I was much better off.
This was the time of free love and peace and flower power and mind altering substances. There were a few like me in school and we were so mellow....... The others were the 'country' type. Bubbas all. The only things I liked about the country were the mushrooms that grew out of the cow patties.
I can now accept that (at least in this aspect) what I am is normal to most of the world. It just didn't serve me well there.
Unsolicited advice: Do not worry about this. You are fine. You will grow to be the wise caring grandma while the others are still fretting about appearances.
From someone that is older (2 years) and wiser..
Posted by Susan47 on November 16, 2004, at 0:28:19
In reply to Re: I wonder, what is it like???, posted by AuntieMel on November 15, 2004, at 10:20:50
I might haver been better off in high school that I never joined the pack mentality either, but I know I was lonely. I ran around with a huge "pack" of girls when I was fourteen it all changed. The pack was actually great, we had the best pyjama parties and we were a pack of all the misfits, too. A pack of misfits, one of us was always in hospital for something. I never was, though. I wouldn't have dared do drugs, but I did smoke cigarettes very briefly. Then we moved to this teeny little mill town where everybody was heavily into beer-drinking and hanging out doing drugs and having young sex, and I was SO outside the norm. So I spent a lot of time alone.
Posted by saw on November 16, 2004, at 2:08:33
In reply to Re: No Need to Adjust Your Set, posted by just plain jane on November 14, 2004, at 2:22:08
Just reading this, I am realising you sound so much like my late Dad. He was forthright and honest and very, very direct though in a quiet sort of way. He was also totally in control of his own behaviour. These are wonderful qualities.
Thank you for letting me "see him".
Please ask all your pups to lick your ears. I just love that feeling.
Sabrina
Posted by just plain jane on November 16, 2004, at 4:58:43
In reply to Re: I wonder » just plain jane, posted by AdaGrace on November 14, 2004, at 9:52:14
Ummmmmmmmmmm.....
AdaWantsToBeAWeirdoGrace...
I don't think you have to hope one day it will rub off on you. (big toooothy grin) I think the plastic coating somebody smeared you with as a kid is pretty much worn off and now your natural weirdness is shining through, more and more.
And, AdaDearGrace, blaming 40 simply will not work. Here, especially; in case you hadn't noticed, we who are beyond 40 are, ummmmmmm... beyond forty. (snickering, eye-rolling)
Now really, those "landmark" birthdays aren't anything different. Just another thing for the normies to blame their oh so normal oh so unhappiness on and keep on being unhappy 'til they can blame their next landmark birthday for what they never did
You, as all of us, have just gotten started. Everything in the past is "a damn good education", ok?
you said
"Now with 40 heading for my front door like a train in a tunnel blaring it's horn, I wish I had been more forthright, I wish I had followed my own path, my own dreams, my own visions, for if I had, perhaps I would not be living with so many regrets."Hop on that train and ride those rails; you lay them out as you go, on your own path, fulfilling your own dreams with your own visions.
"I'm sorry," I say, wrapping my big maternal arms around you, patting your back 'til you burp, "I'm sorry you've had so many rough times. Sorry you've hurt, and been hurt. OK, dear, you can stop burping now." I stop patting your back, hold you at arms length by your shoulders and continue.
"Now you see, dear, I have my regrets, too. Why, I regret all that back patting just now. I don't believe I've EVER had anyone spit up on my shoulder and all down my back like this before.
"But, regret really doesn't help me get the stuff cleaned up, now does it? Nawwwww, but regret CAN help me get down on my self and depressed so I can just sit down right here on the floor and cry about the spitup soaking my shirt.
"Cry 'til my face is all red and swollen and I am so upset I wet my pants and so depressed I don't even care so I just sit here all wet and stinky and cry because I am wet and stinky and depressed.
"Ah, well, I guess it's useless to even think about changing anything 'cause it'll be so hard and take so much time and I'm scared and
"OH! WAIT!!!", I cry out.
"I am supposed to be comforting YOU," shaking my head I roll my eyes at my silly flight of imagination and try to put my feet on the ground, but they
just
won't
touch.Just Plain Got Up Early And Feeling WAY Too Chipper Jane
(and btw, you can't steal it, it's mine. but I'll gladly share it.)
Posted by just plain jane on November 16, 2004, at 5:03:30
In reply to Re: I wonder, what is it like to not have people know, posted by Susan47 on November 14, 2004, at 11:03:34
"we" stuff????
Oh, I see, "we" is the beginning of "weird", yeah, yeaaaah, now I see.
It all makes sense now.
Yes, yes.
We
Weird.(sigh)
it's not even time for my drugs yetyou WATCH people a lot??? eeeeeeeewwwwwwwwwwwww
Posted by just plain jane on November 16, 2004, at 5:13:24
In reply to Re: I wonder, what is it like???, posted by AuntieMel on November 15, 2004, at 10:20:50
Nooooowwwwwwwww, wait a minute...
I never said I was "worried" (smirking)It must be the major age difference, the fact that you are sssssssooooooooooooooooooooo oooooooooooooooooooooooooollllllllllllllllddddddd, compared to me, that accounts for why I like the patties and you like the mushrooms. (I live in the country, was brought up in the city ---- AAAAAKKKKKKKKKKKK)
Thank you for your advice, never worry about not being solicited, I got arrested for soliciting once so I don't do it anymore. (again shaking my head and rolling my eyes. why am i up so early?)
Uuhhh, wise AuntieMel, what does "fretting about appearances" mean? I'm not versed in that language. (soft angelic smile)
just plain
Posted by just plain jane on November 16, 2004, at 5:16:39
In reply to Just Plain Jane, posted by saw on November 16, 2004, at 2:08:33
Posted by AuntieMel on November 16, 2004, at 9:02:57
In reply to Re: I wonder, » AuntieMel, posted by just plain jane on November 16, 2004, at 5:13:24
Fretting about appearances - defined (by me) as being much more concerned about what *other* people think you are then about what you *really* are.
About 5 years ago we moved to an "affluent" neighborhood from the nice comfy middle class one we were in - to get a better high school for the youngest. The men here go to work in designer suits, and the women spend the day at home socializing with each other, jogging, playing tennis - all while perfectly coifed - looking like the ever perfect stepford wives.
But I had the dubious honor of working with a group of them on the sweet 16 party and it seemed like they were all socialite wannabes, secretly bitter that their husbands weren't successful enough to put them in the "best" areas.
Ick. Ick. Ick. Ick. Ick. Ick. Ick.
Sorry - I know this wasn't the original topic. It *is* a reminder of the definition of happiness. Happiness isn't havingg what you want. It's wanting what you have.
Posted by Susan47 on November 16, 2004, at 13:23:27
In reply to Hey! What's this » Susan47, posted by just plain jane on November 16, 2004, at 5:03:30
Yes don't you? How d'you know anything if you don't watch people? I've been "watching" you and you're kinky, but in a good way. heeehee, loved your burping visualizations with AG. We should have a weekend out in the woods to just talk. Hee hee.
Posted by just plain jane on November 16, 2004, at 19:01:47
In reply to Re: Hey! What's thisJPJ, posted by Susan47 on November 16, 2004, at 13:23:27
in the middle of the wilderness here. We'll saddle up the horses and go and where we land, we'll build a fire and pop our little tent and talk til we fall over.
I'll be doing some of that next summer.
jpj
Posted by Susan47 on November 16, 2004, at 19:29:56
In reply to We can get way out » Susan47, posted by just plain jane on November 16, 2004, at 19:01:47
Yes that sounds so inviting
This is the end of the thread.
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