Psycho-Babble Social Thread 405522

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Re: What happens now?

Posted by partlycloudy on October 21, 2004, at 18:36:45

In reply to Re: What happens now?, posted by alesta on October 21, 2004, at 17:56:39

I've been in therapy since January. I don't post often on Psych because I don't know what I'm talking about. I don't know about transference, or inner-children, it feels like my T and I are now doing little circles around each other. I will see her Monday and she's going to call my p-doc in the meantime to "brain"storm. hahahahaha

Alesta, you are one of the most diplomatic people I've met here (that's a good thing). If I spelled out the name of the invader, I'll get knocked off the board completely. Let's just say that the strange posting name that has shown up on that board is, I believe, actually a former and embittered Babbler who doesn't realize who else she (oops, did I say SHE?) is hurting by going after the moderator of this board. And that she is creating far more harm than good, particularly for me.

you're right, karen kay has a lovely ways with words. and i wish i could be more open to other people's views. at the moment all i can feel is the pain they inflict upon me.

 

Re: Belonging

Posted by Mark H. on October 21, 2004, at 19:10:27

In reply to Re: What happens now?, posted by partlycloudy on October 21, 2004, at 18:36:45

Dear PC,

Have you noticed what you, Mair, Nikki, Fi, Toph and I have in common? :-)

"Please do not cite my posts" was brilliant!

Best wishes,

Mark H.

 

Re: What happens now? » partlycloudy

Posted by alesta on October 21, 2004, at 19:33:42

In reply to Re: What happens now?, posted by partlycloudy on October 21, 2004, at 18:36:45


thanks, pc. :) your reply warmed my heart..that is such a relief that you and i are okay. it means a lot. :) perhaps you should take a break from admin, hon? you'll probably feel better. this feeling is going to wash over, i promise. as far as the therapy, i don't know that knowing about transference and inner children is going to help you much anyway..i think a good med is important..hope you're on one..just let this stuff float away, like a big dark cloud, so you can make room for the big, pink, fluffy clouds to move in..i know you can do it..:) something good is around the corner, but ya gotta turn away from the darkness to see the light..you will overcome this..i have faith in you..

love ya,
amy

 

Re: What happens now?

Posted by Jai Narayan on October 21, 2004, at 19:56:40

In reply to What happens now?, posted by partlycloudy on October 21, 2004, at 14:27:57

> That I'm on a leave of absence from work because I never know when I'm going to cry? Or what will trigger me? Do I just bury myself for these 8 weeks and hope I heal?
>
> I don't wanna play any more. I'm so tired. My eyeballs are sore from crying. I want my Babble back. I want the invaders to leave us alone. Can't someone make them go away???????


Dear PC,
I am so sorry you are in a blue state.

It sounds like the crying is not giving you any relief from the frustration and sadness.
I wish I could wave a magic wand and would you see all the love and caring we have for you.
I know that difficulty on Admin has caught your attention...but take a deep breath.
Inhale all our love then exhale the frustration.
Inhale love....
exhale hurt...etc.

I leave you with a joke:

A woman arrived at her doctors office with headphones on.
The Doc said, "Take off those head phones."
She said, "No, I'll die if I do."
He was very angry and repeated...."take them off now."
she did and dropped dead.
The Doc was puzzled.
He picked up the headphones and listened.....
"Inhale.....exhale....inhale....exhale..."

Remember....we love you and that's so much bigger than anything else
Jai

 

Re: Belonging » Mark H.

Posted by fayeroe on October 21, 2004, at 20:55:39

In reply to Re: Belonging, posted by Mark H. on October 21, 2004, at 19:10:27

I'm in your club too, Mark H....:-)

 

I wish there was a way » partlycloudy

Posted by AdaGrace on October 22, 2004, at 0:06:47

In reply to What happens now?, posted by partlycloudy on October 21, 2004, at 14:27:57

to support you like you have supported me. I just feel pretty crappy myself. I'm thinking of you though.....does that help?

 

Re: What happens now? » partlycloudy

Posted by Dinah on October 22, 2004, at 6:12:34

In reply to Re: What happens now? » Miss Honeychurch, posted by partlycloudy on October 21, 2004, at 16:20:47

The sad part is that, unless you joined Babble in a time of unusual peace, this *is* the Babble you joined. (rueful smile)

And all the things you loved about Babble are still there. Sometimes it's hard to see them amid the occasional confusion, but they're still there.

I'm sorry things are going badly for you, at work and here. I always find it very difficult to manage Babble in the way that's healthiest for me. I can step away from the computer, or I can be involved, but it's hard for me to direct my attention to where it would probably be healthiest to direct it, while remaining involved in a way that's healthy for me. But that doesn't mean I can't urge others to try to do it!

What fun things have you been wanting to do, and now have time to do? I must confess that my list would be pretty mundane. Lots of sleep, lots of reading in the bathtub, and finally converting that enormous stack of photos and slides into digital images. I have this real, almost mystical, feeling about photos. I can't stand to be in them myself nowadays, but I adore looking through them and seeing who I was, and reliving the moments with the people I love. It scares me to think I might somehow lose them, so I'm really anxious to back them up on the computer and bring the backup disks somewhere where I'm sure not to lose both originals and backups.

I also really really need to throw out stuff I haven't used in years and reducing the encroaching clutter, before I turn into a packrat like my mom.

And sometimes I get involved in the geneology that is freely available on the internet. I find it absolutely fascinating, since people have done a fair amount of research on certain branches of my family. But then I get discouraged, because I realize it only takes one incorrect name, or one indiscreet woman (smile) to make the whole thing meaningless.

Hmmm... Perhaps you can tell that when I get overwhelmed, I get sidetracked into unproductive enthusiasms. Those are a few of my less expensive ones. :)

 

Re: What happens now? » Dinah

Posted by partlycloudy on October 22, 2004, at 6:54:51

In reply to Re: What happens now? » partlycloudy, posted by Dinah on October 22, 2004, at 6:12:34

Hi, Dinah. Yeah, Babble is what it is, isn't it? Perhaps the problem is that I broadened my interests too far here. I should keep in my yard and not play with the neighbour's children, just like when I was a kid.

I finally took a jewelry making class - sweat flooding off me, hands shaking like I had the d.t.'s - and I've got a lovely pile of sea glass waiting for me to coax it into necklaces and bracelets.

There is not enough time in the world for me to ever catch up on reading, although the ability for me to read and retain information comes and goes like weather pressure systems.

I want to put in more session time with my T and become my own master instead of letting my body rule my life like it's doing.

And I plan to keep coming here, for your help and support, which has always been there for me.
pc

 

Re: What happens now? to Partly

Posted by coral on October 22, 2004, at 7:51:38

In reply to Re: What happens now? » Dinah, posted by partlycloudy on October 22, 2004, at 6:54:51

Dear Partly,

Could you please tell me what sea glass is? I've seen it and once tried to put some in a fountain I had (it morphed into something else!).

Thanks,

Coral

 

Sea glass » coral

Posted by partlycloudy on October 22, 2004, at 8:00:41

In reply to Re: What happens now? to Partly, posted by coral on October 22, 2004, at 7:51:38

It's regular glass that's been scrubbed by the sand and the waves until it becomes translucent, and it looks like it's covered in snow, only when you wet it, the snow goes away. All the rough edges get "sanded" by the same action. It's what happens eventually to all those bottles that get tossed overboard. I found a huge quantity when I was lucky enough to go to Cabo San Lucas, it was all on one beach. I am making wire cages around the glass pieces and stringing them on leather for necklaces.

 

Re: Sea glass

Posted by partlycloudy on October 22, 2004, at 10:14:49

In reply to Sea glass » coral, posted by partlycloudy on October 22, 2004, at 8:00:41

Just made my first necklace. Oh boy, you guys get to live through my OT.
Just be glad I'm not gluing dried pasta shapes onto cardboard and spraypainting them for all eternity, or carving polar bears out of ivory soap.

 

Hey, I might Just want to buy one » partlycloudy

Posted by AdaGrace on October 22, 2004, at 10:20:18

In reply to Re: Sea glass, posted by partlycloudy on October 22, 2004, at 10:14:49

I'm into unique, creative, artistic, design and I just bet that your necklace really looks cool. Send me a picture.

 

Re: Hey, I might Just want to buy one

Posted by partlycloudy on October 22, 2004, at 10:23:17

In reply to Hey, I might Just want to buy one » partlycloudy, posted by AdaGrace on October 22, 2004, at 10:20:18

LOL! I can't yet figure out to work our digital camera, but I'll send you a picture over the weekend. I'll get some help to do it.
This necklace is rather "rustic". My hands have stopped shaking, tho.

 

I am serious here » partlycloudy

Posted by AdaGrace on October 22, 2004, at 10:28:05

In reply to Re: Hey, I might Just want to buy one, posted by partlycloudy on October 22, 2004, at 10:23:17

I really love that kind of jewelry. Hey, my sister the extreem alchoholic in the family makes little painting with fingernail polish. They are very unique, if not disturbing. She has bizarre dreams and some of them look like how she dreams. Very abstract, but very cool, and I have one of her original ones. Now she asks $50 for them. Send that picture. I'd love to see it.

 

okey dokey. (nm)

Posted by partlycloudy on October 22, 2004, at 11:33:50

In reply to I am serious here » partlycloudy, posted by AdaGrace on October 22, 2004, at 10:28:05

 

Re: Belonging: good company to be in! » Mark H.

Posted by Fi on October 22, 2004, at 15:01:30

In reply to Re: Belonging, posted by Mark H. on October 21, 2004, at 19:10:27

Very true! Much more tranquil.

I'm really trying to stay away from PBA. And this board seems a nice place to be at the moment- nice mixture of supporting each other and also a bit of a chat.

Fi

 

Re: Belonging: good company to be in! » Fi

Posted by partlycloudy on October 22, 2004, at 15:14:45

In reply to Re: Belonging: good company to be in! » Mark H., posted by Fi on October 22, 2004, at 15:01:30

Perhaps this could the the "safety" board. yuck yuck yuck
Oh boy someone shut this lady up...lady that's no lady, that's my wife....i already miss rodney dangerfield, i never thought i would say that, he was an unsavoury man...

 

Re: What happens now? » partlycloudy

Posted by Fi on October 22, 2004, at 15:22:54

In reply to What happens now?, posted by partlycloudy on October 21, 2004, at 14:27:57

I'm so sorry that things are so tough for you.

I've also had my own experience of getting up one morning not feeling particularly bad but crying endlessly for about an hour. I went to work- but before I did, wrote a note for my boss.

She was in the office, but I needed to do the note so that she would know that if she spoke to me at all (about anything) I would probably burst into tears! And its at those sorts of times you realise what a narrow band of behaviour is acceptable at work. I was off sick after that, but only a couple of weeks.

Then there is the inconvenience of wanting to go out to do some shopping, but needing to wait till your eyes were just a little less red and puffy from all the crying. And being in the middle of a spell and finding you havent any tissues left, and there isnt much toilet roll either (you havent bought much recently), so you end up using rather thick rough kitchen towels...

I suspect you already know the usual true but dull to hear stuff about getting thru weeks off sick (and in general)? You will probably be able to ignore the rest of this message for that reason!

Forgeting/not thinking about work is a v important part of it. You arent well, and have every right to be away from there. And thinking about work means you have to use up some energy on that, which you deserve to keep to yourself.

8 weeks is too long to spend on the couch (however tempting).

Some social contact with supportive/fun people (if possible), or just anyone who isnt a strain, is essential. Its important that you stay away from people who upset you. You really need to prioritise yourself at the moment. Its like someone with a sprained ankle resting it rather than going jogging!

Then the stuff about having some exercise (doesnt have to be anything strenous)

Getting out of the house.

Doing things that give you a sense of achievement, measured against the more modest goals that are achievable at the moment.

Anything that can distract you for a while. Ideally better than that,and actually entertaining.

Anything that makes you feel better that doesnt involve harmful things such as alcohol, chain smoking or whatever. I got thru one episode with the help of the video of the 'Jungle Book', which I would usually find rather dull/childish.

Anything that makes you laugh is worth its weight in gold!

Having some sort of structure and routine, eg not getting into going to bed anytime between 3-5am then sleeping till mid-pm. Remembering to eat regularly, and of reasonably healthy things (as well as treats)

Oh, I'm rabbiting on. Just so much want you to have a gentle and restorative time.

Fi

 

Re: What happens now? » Fi

Posted by partlycloudy on October 22, 2004, at 16:01:41

In reply to Re: What happens now? » partlycloudy, posted by Fi on October 22, 2004, at 15:22:54

Fi, you are so thoughtful! I was I was awfully productive today - made a necklace, took a shower, cleaned the bathroom (sort of), went grocery shopping - only had one panic attack when I couldn't remember where reverse was in an automatic!!, and I have been schlepping around. My specialty at the moment is having hot flashes. Anyone need an alternative energy source?

 

Re: What happens now? » partlycloudy

Posted by Fi on October 22, 2004, at 18:24:56

In reply to Re: What happens now? » Fi, posted by partlycloudy on October 22, 2004, at 16:01:41

That's a good days-worth! Hope you sleep reasonably well you'll need your rest after all that!

And the way you describe the panic attack, sounds like you found reverse and carried on! Or did a very long detour..!

Sympathies re hot flashes.

Fi

 

Re: What happens now? » partlycloudy

Posted by Dinah on October 22, 2004, at 22:17:02

In reply to Re: What happens now? » Dinah, posted by partlycloudy on October 22, 2004, at 6:54:51

Those sound like great activities! Relaxing. :)

I meant to say before. Psychological tends to go in cycles of topics. But what is discussed just reflects who is posting what at any given time. Just because the current focus isn't on, for example, EMDR or CBT or primal scream therapy, doesn't mean it can't be. It just takes someone to post about those things. :)

What I like best about it is that it's so freeing. There is such a wide range of therapists who have such a wide range of what they prefer to have their clients do that it seems clear that I'm free to do or say just about anything I want and my therapist's reaction has more to do with him than it does with me or what I've done. I don't know why, but I find that terribly liberating - that there's no one right way to do therapy.

I do know you got burned there once. :( Fortunately that's something that doesn't often happen. Most people understand that therapy is so highly individual that they support everyone finding what works for them.

 

PC, I love that you said savoury! :-D (nm)

Posted by gardenergirl on October 22, 2004, at 23:17:06

In reply to Re: What happens now? » partlycloudy, posted by Dinah on October 22, 2004, at 22:17:02

 

I mean unsavoury--- Such a cool word! (nm)

Posted by gardenergirl on October 22, 2004, at 23:17:43

In reply to PC, I love that you said savoury! :-D (nm), posted by gardenergirl on October 22, 2004, at 23:17:06

 

Re: What happens now?

Posted by trucker on October 24, 2004, at 17:40:10

In reply to What happens now?, posted by partlycloudy on October 21, 2004, at 14:27:57

hang in there things will get better... it is the time of the year when we don't get enough light...and things get more depressed and moody.. i myself was told by T to get one of those light things to do light therapy with.. because i for one need light.. the light i love the most is JESUS's

trucker

//////////////////////////////////////////////////> That I'm on a leave of absence from work because I never know when I'm going to cry? Or what will trigger me? Do I just bury myself for these 8 weeks and hope I heal?
>
> I don't wanna play any more. I'm so tired. My eyeballs are sore from crying. I want my Babble back. I want the invaders to leave us alone. Can't someone make them go away???????

 

Re: What happens now?

Posted by trucker on October 24, 2004, at 17:49:06

In reply to Re: What happens now?, posted by Miss Honeychurch on October 21, 2004, at 15:27:16

ask your T where to get a light for light therapy.. it will help depression and make ya feel alive again

trucker

///////////////////////////////////////////////////////> (((pc)))
>
> Your Babble is still here! It just seems to go through phases where people like to stir up trouble. Frankly, I am too dense to truly comprehend 99% of what is going on at Admin, so perhaps that is why I am not distressed about anything.
>
> What helps me in times like this is to stop the "shoulding." Such as, perhaps you believe that people "should" behave courteously and respectfully. OR perhaps you believe people "should" all get along. Well, nowhere is that a universal law or written in stone, so once you let go of the "should" and think "Ok, some people are beahving badly. I don't like their actions, but that doesn't mean they should be polite and nice. People are people and we're all fallible humans. I'll just stay away from Admin for awhile."
>
> I always find once I let go of the should on the actions of others, I become much less disturbable (thank you Albert Ellis!)
>
> As for your 8 weeks: read lots of interesting an eclectic things, rent foreign movies, organize your closets, exercise every day. Can you look at is asa time to be working on yourself? A sort of 8 week self-improvement time? A time to eat better, exercise, do special things for people. Read psychology books, do lots of writing. What do you think?


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