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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 3 of 3. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by mscrane on August 2, 2002, at 11:13:20
My parents are coming to stay for a month!!! They live in China and we only see them once a year..I should be happy, but I feel the anxiety creeping up...they are decent people...but they tend to whip everything into a frenzy, and having my routine changed can make me a little crazy.
They are very controlling, and demand my time 24/7...which I can understand...but I need at least an hour a day to do my workout and focus...they think it's crazy...they think I'm crazy because of my OCD...which of course they feel I could get over if I really wanted to...
serenity now.......
Posted by Ted on August 2, 2002, at 12:08:44
In reply to my parents arrive tonight!, posted by mscrane on August 2, 2002, at 11:13:20
> My parents are coming to stay for a month!!! They live in China and we only see them once a year..
My parents live about 1000 miles away and I rarely see them at all. I live in California and I think they are afraid they will get herpes from the air and AIDS from the water or something. BTW, we only talk over the phone about 4-5 times a year and they are always in a hurry to go.
>... and having my routine changed can make me a little crazy.
>
> They are very controlling, and demand my time 24/7...which I can understand...but I need at least an hour a day to do my workout and focus...they think it's crazy...They can only take advantage of you if you let them. (my favorite quote from Ann Landers) Tell them as soon as they arrive that you ARE taking your time alone and they can go for a walk or whatever then.
My father-in-law is also very controlling and my wife is a wimp at confronting him. On a few occasions I have said, "This is my house, not yours" and "if you don't like it here, there are motels." That was all it took to keep him under control; he is perfectly civil now.
>they think I'm crazy because of my OCD...
That's probably true! It's certainly true in my and my wife's families.
>which of course they feel I could get over if I really wanted to...
And this is where a little education wouldn't hurt. But if they have OCD too (probably so, but they would never admit it!) and they are controlling (a sign of OCD in its own right), then trying to educate them would be "like teaching a pig to sing: It won't work and it annoys the pig." :-)
Good luck and keep in touch with us. You might want to stock up on Xanax before they get here (for THEM, not you!).
Ted
Posted by mscrane on August 2, 2002, at 13:57:32
In reply to Re: my parents arrive tonight! » mscrane, posted by Ted on August 2, 2002, at 12:08:44
I find it very hard to confront my parents...my father is English and an engineer (need I say more?) and my mother has high blood pressure and I don't want to upset her..(she's always been a MAJOR drama queen...and menopause only made it worse)..she was a "valium-mother" in the 70s, so I don't think she has ever been diagnosed properly...
I am hoping venting here will help...and your support is very appreciated..VERY!!! I need all the "buffers" I can find...a place to breathe, if you like.....I am keeping the ativan at close range...(I rarely use it, but I think I will be needing it.....)
This is the end of the thread.
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