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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 19 of 19. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by Twin leaf on December 19, 2011, at 14:07:54
I have been going through seemingly endless months of a horrible negative transference (based on my mother having been hospitalized for post-partum depression just after I was born). No matter what we both tried to do, I kept experiencing him as distant and uncaring.
Until today! Suddenly all those negative feelings dissolved. I felt that we were close and so wonderfully connected. I honestly think that is the thing I care the most about in the world!
I hope that this was real work done, so that the bad times will be briefer, and the wonderful ones, like today, more frequent.
Posted by Anemone on December 19, 2011, at 20:28:27
In reply to One of those great sessions...., posted by Twin leaf on December 19, 2011, at 14:07:54
Hi Twin Leaf, Your session sounds so warm and wonderful. I hope you have many more good sessions like the one you had today.
Posted by Dinah on December 19, 2011, at 22:13:39
In reply to One of those great sessions...., posted by Twin leaf on December 19, 2011, at 14:07:54
I love those sessions!
I hope you're able to hold onto those feelings.
Posted by annierose on December 19, 2011, at 22:14:37
In reply to Re: One of those great sessions...., posted by Anemone on December 19, 2011, at 20:28:27
May your wish come true!!
Those are the best sessions - when both people in the room are in total synch - a specialness that goes back and forth ... as my therapist would say "a glorious love affair". Soak it up, enjoy.
It is possible for those yummy periods of happiness to be extended.
Posted by Twin leaf on December 21, 2011, at 18:24:35
In reply to Re: One of those great sessions...., posted by annierose on December 19, 2011, at 22:14:37
Thank you, everyone! ( Dinah, Annierose and Anemone). From what you say, you know just what I'm talking about, and how wonderful it is to feel connected after a long period of working through one's extreme aloneness. There aren't many places where one could express those feelings - hearing from you means a lot.
Posted by SLS on December 21, 2011, at 19:11:42
In reply to One of those great sessions...., posted by Twin leaf on December 19, 2011, at 14:07:54
I am happy that you reached such an important point in your growth process.
I can't say that I have experienced the phenomena that you describe. However, I do know what it feels like to make human connections after long periods of emotional solitude. I feel warm and free.
- Scott
Posted by Twin leaf on December 21, 2011, at 19:33:07
In reply to Re: One of those great sessions.... » Twin leaf, posted by SLS on December 21, 2011, at 19:11:42
Yes, exactly, Scott. I think it does happen to us all, randomly, in our interactions with others.- we are such a social species and connections are vital to us. I think I am in a minority here in relying principally upon intensive therapy to help me heal from my mother's absence during my earliest years of life. I don't think I know whether you have given therapy a major try - have you? (if you want to answer, of course).
Posted by SLS on December 21, 2011, at 20:54:47
In reply to Re: One of those great sessions...., posted by Twin leaf on December 21, 2011, at 19:33:07
> Yes, exactly, Scott. I think it does happen to us all, randomly, in our interactions with others.- we are such a social species and connections are vital to us. I think I am in a minority here in relying principally upon intensive therapy to help me heal from my mother's absence during my earliest years of life. I don't think I know whether you have given therapy a major try - have you? (if you want to answer, of course).
Psychotherapy was the first thing I asked for when I was in high-school. I was actually resistant to the idea that my depression was biological in origin. I have used psychotherapy frequently over the years; always profiting from it in some way. I haven't had psychodynamic therapy, though. My early years were fraught with physical abuse and neglect. It helps for me to understand how damaging this has been. I might never have had depression were my early years more nurturing. It is hard to know.
- Scott
Posted by Phillipa on December 22, 2011, at 10:28:33
In reply to Re: One of those great sessions...., posted by SLS on December 21, 2011, at 20:54:47
My life was all mental abuse. I guess I kind of was able to escape by being dropped off at a country club all day and swimming on the team and playing tennis. I don't think theraphy was ever mentioned by a single person I knew back then. When did people start using theraphy for dealing with problems. I guess the mindset back in 50's was no one thought their lives were different from others? And when my Mom died I was in high school and dating. And I forgave her as meds cortisone caused her to mentally abuse me. I knew it wasn't her or me. Phillipa
Posted by pegasus on December 22, 2011, at 11:33:14
In reply to One of those great sessions...., posted by Twin leaf on December 19, 2011, at 14:07:54
It's reassuring to hear about this. I think I'm still waiting for that epiphany, or whatever it was. I'm so stuck thinking/expecting people close to me, including my T, to get fed up with me and walk away. It has happened so many other times in real life (well, my T debates the "fed up" part, but still . . .). And in my resistance to being reassured about this, I often experience people as distant, uncaring, or even hostile or angry at me, when they're totally not.
I'm glad you had at least a moment outside the shadow of that. I hope it's a lot more than a moment.
- P
Posted by Twin leaf on December 22, 2011, at 14:09:41
In reply to Re: One of those great sessions...., posted by pegasus on December 22, 2011, at 11:33:14
I think I'm a lot like you - very fearful of, and expecting, rejection, and feeling that it's actually happened - when it hasn't. In reality, I am usually pretty well liked, and give the impression of having it all together. The interior reality is painfully different - it's all "off"!
I just hate feeling distrustful and alone when I am with my wonderful therapist, and SO glad and grateful for the times when I feel comfortable and close. Getting better for me really means achieving more of those wonderful times. You too?
Posted by Morgan Miller on January 17, 2012, at 11:15:42
In reply to Re: One of those great sessions...., posted by SLS on December 21, 2011, at 20:54:47
Hey Scott,
Because psychodynamic therapy, especially with a really good therapist, involves a strong and trust building bond, where the therapist is able to use their empathic abilities to help th patient draw on emotions, it is like no other form, and in my opinion, the only way to have a chance of healing th psyche-which may still be driving chemistry to some extent-and growing to love oneself the way they were supposed to. It is not easy, an most of the work is done with yourself outside of therapy sessions. Those that choose not to face the sadness and anger inside them, to the point where they can feel these deep inner emotions as they come to the surface, will not succeed. This is why so many do not go to therapy or drop out, it just is not easy to deal with our inner demons. Its one thing t understand them and be aware of them, but it's another to actually spend some time facing them and doing all the emotional work. These are intangible things, which may be another reason why people have such a difficult time understanding and dealing with them in a therapeutic manner.
Posted by Morgan Miller on January 17, 2012, at 11:20:13
In reply to Re: One of those great sessions...., posted by Morgan Miller on January 17, 2012, at 11:15:42
I have to say, I do not think most of the people on the medication board have really taken the time, or want to take the time to work with a psychodynamic therapist and spend months or years reflecting and introspectively analyzing in a way that would benefit them.
Posted by SLS on January 19, 2012, at 11:20:13
In reply to Re: One of those great sessions...., posted by Morgan Miller on January 17, 2012, at 11:20:13
> I have to say, I do not think most of the people on the medication board have really taken the time, or want to take the time to work with a psychodynamic therapist and spend months or years reflecting and introspectively analyzing in a way that would benefit them.
I have a problem with becoming attached and dependent upon a therapist for years on end. Perhaps I don't understand the need for such things as I have had good results with IPT and CBT. I like the operating premise of psychodynamics. I just question its appropriateness for everyone.
- Scott
Posted by Phillipa on January 19, 2012, at 19:01:42
In reply to Re: One of those great sessions...., posted by SLS on January 19, 2012, at 11:20:13
I sure wouldn't want to be dependant on a therapist but having someone listen and offer good advise week after week would be great. Had a pdoc that did this and it worked was med free til moved. Phillipa
Posted by morgan miller on January 20, 2012, at 0:07:27
In reply to Re: One of those great sessions...., posted by SLS on January 19, 2012, at 11:20:13
I hear ya Scott. I think if you found the right therapist, they could help guide you in a way that you could eventually break free, at least to the point where you would go back for periodic visits or brief periods.
I do believe there might be some amount of angst that comes with allowing oneself to become vulnerable in psychodynamic therapy that may scare people away. I also believe that allowing ourselves to be this vulnerable is the only way to really have a chance of resolving inner conflicts. I also think that if we have not tried psychodynamic group therapy, we probably have not had a chance to go further with our healing and growth. These types of therapies are supposed to make someone feel anxious at times, if they did not, they would not be working. Feeling anxiety is a natural response to facing our internal conflicts-as are feeling sad, depressing, rage, and anger.
Morgan
Posted by morgan miller on January 20, 2012, at 0:13:17
In reply to Re: One of those great sessions.... » SLS, posted by Phillipa on January 19, 2012, at 19:01:42
> I sure wouldn't want to be dependant on a therapist but having someone listen and offer good advise week after week would be great. Had a pdoc that did this and it worked was med free til moved. Phillipa
Hey Phillipa..therapists, at least the really good ones, are not necessarily supposed to be advice givers, though they may suggest some things that could be helpful from time to time. They are really there to help guide us in a way that we start to come up with some of the answers. It takes doing lots of introspection and reflection, and time doing these during the week in between sessions.
Posted by SLS on January 20, 2012, at 15:46:26
In reply to Re: One of those great sessions...., posted by morgan miller on January 20, 2012, at 0:07:27
Hi Morgan.
I appreciate the time you took to address my concerns. Thank you.
- Scott
> I hear ya Scott. I think if you found the right therapist, they could help guide you in a way that you could eventually break free, at least to the point where you would go back for periodic visits or brief periods.
>
> I do believe there might be some amount of angst that comes with allowing oneself to become vulnerable in psychodynamic therapy that may scare people away. I also believe that allowing ourselves to be this vulnerable is the only way to really have a chance of resolving inner conflicts. I also think that if we have not tried psychodynamic group therapy, we probably have not had a chance to go further with our healing and growth. These types of therapies are supposed to make someone feel anxious at times, if they did not, they would not be working. Feeling anxiety is a natural response to facing our internal conflicts-as are feeling sad, depressing, rage, and anger.
>
> Morgan
Posted by Morgan Miller on January 21, 2012, at 11:04:59
In reply to Re: One of those great sessions.... » morgan miller, posted by SLS on January 20, 2012, at 15:46:26
Of course Scott..I wish you all the best.
Morgan
This is the end of the thread.
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