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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 18 of 18. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by rnny on March 29, 2010, at 23:03:39
My T told me today I need to make friends but I shouldn't make friends with anyone in the "psychiatric community". Or in other words those undergoing treatment. Says I am too good for them. Says I am too intelligent, too sophisticated and don't have serious cognitive problems. I am not kidding. She says my problems aren't halluctinations, delusions and the like so to stay away from the "psychiatric community" in general. Says they are not the kind of people I should be hooking up with for friendship. I told her she needn't worry because I wasn't looking to the "psychiatric community" for friendship. But I forgot to mention this board and I do consider everyone on it my friend. And I don't plan on going anywhere.
Posted by Dinah on March 30, 2010, at 7:47:26
In reply to don't make friends with those in psych community, posted by rnny on March 29, 2010, at 23:03:39
Perhaps your therapist is in the wrong line of work.
Posted by Annierose on March 30, 2010, at 20:44:56
In reply to don't make friends with those in psych community, posted by rnny on March 29, 2010, at 23:03:39
I felt insulted by your post. I am not any of those things either. But who am I to judge others? Maybe you are --- being so smart and above us all.
Posted by obsidian on March 30, 2010, at 21:27:51
In reply to don't make friends with those in psych community, posted by rnny on March 29, 2010, at 23:03:39
wow...so, geez, I don't quite know how to respond to this.
I mean I am thankful that I don't hear voices and I am not generally deluded (I think ;-), but sometimes people do experience those things, some really great people.what exactly constitutes the "psychiatric community"...mood disorders? anxiety disorders? psychotic disorders?, some melange of these?
or does that refer to "backward schizophrenics"? those lost in their own illnesses, isolated, spending large portions of their lives in state institutions?
her comment confuses me...
Posted by obsidian on March 30, 2010, at 21:41:06
In reply to Re: don't make friends with those in psych community » rnny, posted by obsidian on March 30, 2010, at 21:27:51
and to add...there are many brilliant people suffering with psychiatric illness
I think it is best for any person to form relationships which they find mutually satisfying.
"psychiatric community"? is that us? do we have secret handshakes, special T-shirts, little secret questions we can identify one another with (i.e. "hey, do you know my friend Thora, Thora Zine?")
funny, I was just thinking about some ignorant thing a "mental health professional" said to me...
Posted by Verloren on March 31, 2010, at 13:47:35
In reply to don't make friends with those in psych community, posted by rnny on March 29, 2010, at 23:03:39
Just last week, I was thinking about how a few of my close friends have shared with me that they are in therapy for one reason or another.
And I was relieved actually. Now I can talk to them about my issues and not feel judged. They understand and most importantly, they know me and have the ability to provide support to me in a way a non-therapy friend couldn't.
I was wondering about my other friends. How I would probably not know if they were in therapy unless they said so.
I don't think it's possible to avoid making friends with certain groups of people, as you won't know who they are and what issues they have right away.
I am curious as well about what constitutes a "psychiatric community". Does she mean an inpatient or outpatient facility where you would meet someone face-to-face? Or any group of individuals with psychiatric issues? What do you view as a "psychiatric community"? Is babble one? Psych Central, Support Groups, etc?
"Those undergoing treatment" are not exclusively people who are having "hallucinations, delusions and the like". People undergo treatment for a variety of reasons. Just as you are undergoing treatment for your reasons, there is someone just like you with a similar situation. So would you be too intelligent and above that person?
All the therapists I have seen so far agree that those seeking help are in a better position than those who are not.
Would you rather befriend someone who had a mental illness but was not seeking help for it and therefore was not a member of the "psychiatric community"? Would that person be a better choice?
Wow, I guess I really don't feel comfortable with what your t said. But all Ts say things that are not the best and it always frustrates me.
This one was very inappropriate in my opinion. Actually it really ticked me off. I don't think lower intelligence and delusions go hand-in-hand. If she believes that, I would question her ability to provide quality treatment. Does she think all her hallucinating patients are dumb and unsophisticated? It must be so hard for her working with such people. Poor her. (sarcasm intended)
Posted by Sigismund on March 31, 2010, at 18:45:13
In reply to don't make friends with those in psych community, posted by rnny on March 29, 2010, at 23:03:39
My T says that you wouldn't want to be friends with people in his profession because so many of them are sociopaths.
Posted by obsidian on April 1, 2010, at 23:24:23
In reply to Re: don't make friends with those in psych community, posted by Sigismund on March 31, 2010, at 18:45:13
a related topic?
I had an uncle I never met until shortly before his death.
He lived alone, in a house unfit for human beings.
No one seemed to mention him...a mystery he was.
Well it turns out that he had "episodes" and was diagnosed as schizophrenic back when everyone was diagnosed schizophrenic.
who knows how his symptoms might have been described now, I heard he had "episodes" and definite psychotic behavior, probably with a mood component.
anyway, my uncle's father, when describing what it was that made my uncle different said that "the devil got him"...how ridiculous is that?
I met him just once, a lovely man actually, quite normal looking, but how might his life have been with a greater understanding and some intervention?
pardon my tangent, 'tis a bewildering situation
Posted by floatingbridge on April 2, 2010, at 15:39:42
In reply to don't make friends with those in psych community, posted by rnny on March 29, 2010, at 23:03:39
Hi rnny,
Thanks for posting. I like you, and I'm probably not alone here, so despite your therapist's advice, you might just have friends in the forbidden community!
:-D
Now, my pdoc once cautioned me about
spending time with depressed people. Hmmm. Well-intentioned as he was, he didn't see the implications of his statement. That I was an unhealthy influence on others.I have depressed friends, and thank goodness! They understand. I have
uber-positive friends who have no idea what some negative life experiences feel like. I cast a wide net regarding friendship. That's my healthy model for recovery.My same pdoc has given me a DVD to view--some Fred Smiley seminar about
removing the stigma of MI. Have you seen it? (I haven't yet.)Anyone, were you able to talk to your therapist about this? I might have been too stunned and uncomfortable to
myself. Her statement is odd and difficult. She's giving you a compliment--which I don't doubt the truth of--by way of putting down a large, vaguely defined group. That doesn't feel like helpful reassurance.I'd talk to her.
Posted by Sigismund on April 3, 2010, at 15:42:30
In reply to stigma and misunderstanding » Sigismund, posted by obsidian on April 1, 2010, at 23:24:23
Decades ago now, I went to see a friend in the loony bin. You know how you negotiate such crowds with some circumspection? Anyway I'm making my way through and this young man stands in front of me, looks me directly in the eye and said 'You know I'm God, don't you?' I was stuck for words. He looked radiant. He might not have been an ideal friend...... beats talking about the weather, though.
Posted by Sigismund on April 3, 2010, at 18:03:42
In reply to Re: stigma and misunderstanding » obsidian, posted by Sigismund on April 3, 2010, at 15:42:30
Is this from Neil Peart?
Living in the limelight
The universal dream
For those who wish to seem
Those who wish to be
Must put aside the alienation
Get on with the fascination
The real relation
The underlying theme
Posted by floatingbridge on April 3, 2010, at 18:06:17
In reply to Re: stigma and misunderstanding » obsidian, posted by Sigismund on April 3, 2010, at 15:42:30
Hey Sigi,
When I was in the looney bin, the therapy was a joke. No doctor had anything to say except a platitude or cliche. (I imagine some places are better.) One fellow, (I'm guessing now; what did I know then?), was ramping into full mania. We would talk off and on about god and whatever, until I finally told him I couldn't discuss god because I was being triggered. He stroked my arm gently and said "Your father hurt you very deeply, and that was wrong." A more significant moment than the preceding two years of therapy compressed.
He was in lock-down that night. I never saw him again.
Posted by BabyToes on April 4, 2010, at 0:30:30
In reply to don't make friends with those in psych community, posted by rnny on March 29, 2010, at 23:03:39
I do feel I understand what your T might be saying, as my T says to stay away from boards like this because you really don't know who you are talking to, you don't see them face to face and so many things can get misinterpreted.
One who is working on becoming more healthy, will do better being around healthier people. For example, if you are an alcoholic, you will have better success if you stay away from people who drink a lot when you socialize. I think till one is healed, it probably will help to stay around more healthier people or least not to be around someone who can bring you right now with them.
My T can tell the difference in me when I am no longer on message boards like this and spending time with real life friends. I am not as depressed or anxious. I am happier. Now if only I could keep following, her advice now, she does know me and knows what she is talking about.
Posted by obsidian on April 4, 2010, at 19:43:48
In reply to Re: stigma and misunderstanding » obsidian, posted by Sigismund on April 3, 2010, at 15:42:30
Can you imagine going to lunch with that guy. So, it's nice out today, why'd you do that?
Congratulations on Easter.
So, when are you planning the apocalypse?delusions are so amazing to me
my uncle had some of the classic ones...the radio talking to him (well now of course the radio talks, but not directly to someone in particular)
and he thought my mother was trying to poison him with the chicken she had bought
He did think the neighbors were against him.I met muhammed the prophet once.
Reality can be quite subjective.
I suppose it's quite a painful thing to lose someone important to you like that,
and painful to be in that place yourself, perhaps especially if you have some understanding that you are there.
Posted by Sigismund on April 4, 2010, at 22:36:45
In reply to Re: stigma and misunderstanding » Sigismund, posted by obsidian on April 4, 2010, at 19:43:48
Oh yeah :)
What'd happen is he'd say 'Drop everything and follow me' and I'd say 'Yes'.
Posted by Sigismund on April 4, 2010, at 22:40:35
In reply to Re: stigma and misunderstanding » Sigismund, posted by obsidian on April 4, 2010, at 19:43:48
>I met muhammed the prophet once.
Peace be upon him.
I've only ever seen the Christian ones, though there were those people with things in their brains on which depended the peace of the world between the Chinese and Russian communists.
Posted by floatingbridge on April 5, 2010, at 0:23:12
In reply to Re: stigma and misunderstanding » Sigismund, posted by obsidian on April 4, 2010, at 19:43:48
My aunt would be quite happy when she was the virgin mary, wearing her sister's breadbasket on her head about the neighborhood. Then there were the times her siblings would lure her into the car by telling her they were keeping her safe from the Mafia; by then her paranoia was insufferable to her, and imagine everyone else. the ride ended at the hospital--not a very nice one. i was told she had gone off her diabetic medicine.
the guy you mention--a savvy hostess would place his and my dad's name cards side by side at a supper party.
>Can you imagine going to lunch with that guy. So, it's nice out today, why'd you do that?
> Congratulations on Easter.
> So, when are you planning the apocalypse?
>
> delusions are so amazing to me
>
> my uncle had some of the classic ones...the radio talking to him (well now of course the radio talks, but not directly to someone in particular)
> and he thought my mother was trying to poison him with the chicken she had bought
> He did think the neighbors were against him.
>
> I met muhammed the prophet once.
>
> Reality can be quite subjective.
> I suppose it's quite a painful thing to lose someone important to you like that,
> and painful to be in that place yourself, perhaps especially if you have some understanding that you are there.
>
>
Posted by fleeting flutterby on April 5, 2010, at 20:23:57
In reply to don't make friends with those in psych community, posted by rnny on March 29, 2010, at 23:03:39
> My T told me today I need to make friends but I shouldn't make friends with anyone in the "psychiatric community". Or in other words those undergoing treatment. Says I am too good for them. Says I am too intelligent, too sophisticated and don't have serious cognitive problems. I am not kidding. She says my problems aren't halluctinations, delusions and the like so to stay away from the "psychiatric community" in general. Says they are not the kind of people I should be hooking up with for friendship. I told her she needn't worry because I wasn't looking to the "psychiatric community" for friendship. But I forgot to mention this board and I do consider everyone on it my friend. And I don't plan on going anywhere.<<
----flutterby: could it be that your T. was being kind and was really saying that you could be impressionable and get others ideas/experiences caught in your head and then possibly make them your own?? (not saying you do that-- just maybe she's concerned?)
Only and idea-- I mean no offense at all.respectfully,
flutterby
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