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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 14 of 14. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by lemonaide on August 21, 2008, at 15:27:51
I just can't take it anymore, my nights are filled with horror. My husband said I was violently thrashing about last night, making weird sounds,shaking, screaming, he though I was going to hurt him. I only remember waking up after several nightmares shaking, breathing hard.
My mom was chasing after me, and got my kids, even though I did stuff to her with her lit cigarettes that I can't believe I even dreamed about, it makes me feel like I am capable of evil like her. I confronted the relatives about her, some believed me some didn't, but she still got my kids. This scares the hell out of me, my worst fear. I know it was just a dream and I shouldn't be scared of the boogy man, but I am still quite shaken even this afternoon.
I called today to see if my T had an opening, he didn't, so I asked him to call me. He hasn't yet.
I feel like such a freak
Posted by Angela2 on August 21, 2008, at 16:54:57
In reply to Nightmares haunt me, make me feel insane, posted by lemonaide on August 21, 2008, at 15:27:51
(((((Lemonaide))))) I hope your T calls you and I hope you're feeling better by now. do something good for yourself. Something you know will make you feel better.
Posted by Wittgensteinz on August 21, 2008, at 16:58:37
In reply to Nightmares haunt me, make me feel insane, posted by lemonaide on August 21, 2008, at 15:27:51
You're not a freak. I have these kinds of dreams a lot. They are usually similar - involving my mother - she's mad with me for some reason or another, and I'm terrified. I've also had dreams where I've confronted her, or she's found out that I've shared about what she did.
Likewise, my partner has mentioned times when I've been so agitated in my sleep - thrashing about, trembling and shouting out/screaming. When I was in the hospital, apparently the same thing happened, although I don't recall the dreams.
Take care of yourself. Do you have any meds to help you have a good night's sleep. I take Seroquel sometimes just before going to bed to help knock me out. The idea is I am not so aware of these vivid dreams (or perhaps to stop me having them - not sure of the logic). I still have the dreams even with the Seroquel but they don't seem to affect me quite the same - the pain of them doesn't linger into the day so much.
It's terrible when you have a horrible night, and the images stay with you the whole day.
If I recall, are you diagnosed with PTSD (my apologies if I'm wrong or out of place to ask this) - I just wonder whether these kinds of dreams qualify as 'flashback nightmares' in terms of a PTSD diagnosis. Are these kinds of nightmares part of PTSD? I've wondered for a while whether I have PTSD.
Witti
Posted by rskontos on August 21, 2008, at 17:18:38
In reply to Re: Nightmares haunt me, make me feel insane, posted by Wittgensteinz on August 21, 2008, at 16:58:37
No I second you are not a freak. I too have awakened my husband screaming from nightmares. I don't remember them though. My brain is still protecting me from my childhood even in my sleep. My xanax has protected me from these dreams. I had flooded myself with flashbacks but thankfully these have stopped for now.
Share this with your T if you can. I haven't shared all of mine with mine so do as I say not as I've done.:)
I don't always practice what I preach. In any case, I do know how terrifying this all is.
rsk
Posted by Partlycloudy on August 21, 2008, at 17:40:21
In reply to Nightmares haunt me, make me feel insane, posted by lemonaide on August 21, 2008, at 15:27:51
Are you still doing your EMDR in therapy? Just a thought, if you are, maybe it is running over into your dreams. If that's the case then it might be time to give it a rest for the moment. You can always return to it at a later time when you have more resilience.
PartlyCloudy
Posted by lemonaide on August 21, 2008, at 20:40:57
In reply to Re: Nightmares haunt me, make me feel insane, posted by Wittgensteinz on August 21, 2008, at 16:58:37
Hi Witti,
Yes, I have PTSD, you remember right. I can't say they were flashbacks because this stuff didn't happen, so I think they would be considered nightmares I think. When I have my flashbacks, it is of something that has happened, at least I think that is how it works.
My T didn't call me back, which is weird that he didn't, I am kind of worried now about him. I know he is usually not in on Fridays, so I guess I have to deal with this on my own.
The thing is I have stopped taking my sleeping pills because they were giving me weird dreams, but not bad ones though. So I don't know what is going on.
Nightmares and flashbacks are a big part of PTSD,you are right about that, also being very jumpy which I am. I am tied of being afraid. I am going to try to get some sleep tonight, I am kinda scared to even go to bed.
Posted by Daisym on August 21, 2008, at 22:21:04
In reply to Re: Nightmares haunt me, make me feel insane » Wittgensteinz, posted by lemonaide on August 21, 2008, at 20:40:57
Nightmares are something I constantly struggle with. A few things work for me, including sleeping pills.
Exercise about an hour before bed. Makes you tired enough but not too tired and wound up.
Watch your caffeine and sugar in the evening.
Try to imagine ending your dream in an OK way while you are awake. Take it out to a place where you come out safe and strong.
Imagine a safe person watching over you with the power to enter a dream that gets scary. You are programing your mind to deal with the fears, even when you think you don't have any control.
Keep warm. Shivering makes bad dreams worse. Especially your feet.
I hope they stop soon
Posted by lemonaide on August 22, 2008, at 11:07:17
In reply to Re: Nightmares haunt me, make me feel insane, posted by Angela2 on August 21, 2008, at 16:54:57
Thanks Angela,
He finally called me just now, he normally calls back the same day so I was a little worried he wouldn't call me back until Monday. But I left my message yesterday afternoon, so maybe he didn't check his messages before he left. Today he was there just because a plummer was coming.
He told me it really confirms that we need to proceed with the trauma stuff, yeah me, ick. But I have to do it if I want to get better.So next Tues, will be a big one I think. Well I will try to do something productive this weekend, to help with all my nervous energy. Thanks again for your support, sorry if I haven't been responding to much on Babble.
Posted by lemonaide on August 22, 2008, at 11:18:08
In reply to Re: Nightmares haunt me, (((((((lemonaide), posted by rskontos on August 21, 2008, at 17:18:38
Hey Rk,
It is nice to talk to you, I miss you. I know you know what I am talking about. How are things going? I haven't been reading the boards too much because I have been feeling overwhelmed lately. I kinda go in spurts it seems.
I have told my T pretty much everything that I know myself, he called today and I told him about what happened the other night. I didn't go into the dream because it was a phone call. and we have next Tues. He isn't as comforting on the phone as face to face. Seems like he uses canned phrases or something. He says he looks forward to working with me, which is nice, but I think I hear it too much, It doesn't seem as helpful. But I know he still means well.
d
Last night I slept well, but I think I might try the xanax too if it continues. It sure sucks that we have to pay the price for what others have done to us.
Posted by lemonaide on August 22, 2008, at 11:25:50
In reply to Re: Nightmares haunt me, make me feel insane » lemonaide, posted by Partlycloudy on August 21, 2008, at 17:40:21
Hi Partly Cloudy,
It is nice to see you also on the boards now. I haven't done EMDR for quite a while at least about my past, so I think it is just the good old PTSD bugging me again. But I talked to my T and he said it confirms it for him that we need to continue with it again. It is so hard, but it seems to help in the long run. But yeah, I am scared to go asleep the night of the EMDR, cuz who knows what will happen.Thanks for your support PC
Posted by Phillipa on August 22, 2008, at 12:43:52
In reply to Re: Nightmares haunt me, make me feel insane » Partlycloudy, posted by lemonaide on August 22, 2008, at 11:25:50
Lemonaide night mares nightly seems I'm never able to find things or it's about my kids when little and they mesh into the ebay stuff. I think mine are stress related. Hope you slept well last night. Phillipa
Posted by rskontos on August 22, 2008, at 13:37:21
In reply to Re: Nightmares haunt me, (((((((lemonaide) » rskontos, posted by lemonaide on August 22, 2008, at 11:18:08
Yeah, it does. I wish you luck. I have shut mine down for now yet I am having a few flashback breakthroughs right now in the most strange moments. My T asked me about them but for now I don't want to talk about them. I am thinking about letting sleeping dogs lie.
I am trying to move on past it. I having started working some and exercising some.
I am sleeping heavy due to the xanax.
take care good luck next session
rsk
Posted by seldomseen on August 23, 2008, at 9:43:32
In reply to Nightmares haunt me, make me feel insane, posted by lemonaide on August 21, 2008, at 15:27:51
I'm no stranger to the nightmares myself. It's like my brain just waits until I go to sleep to undercut all the progress I have made. The way they make me feel the next day is also just the pits.
My therapist and I and used my dreams to a large extent to uncover what I'm really feeling vs what I might actually say I am feeling.
My advice? Interpret, Interpret, Interpret. Not only does it take the emotional power out of the dream by putting into the rational realm, but it actually may reveal something that you haven't considered, but that your mind is telling you to look at. Your dreams may represent something totally different that what you originally assumed.
I'm sorry this is happening to you. Take good care.
Seldom
Posted by susan47 on August 26, 2008, at 18:03:18
In reply to Re: Nightmares haunt me, make me feel insane » Partlycloudy, posted by lemonaide on August 22, 2008, at 11:25:50
This is the end of the thread.
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