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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
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Posted by crushedout on June 11, 2007, at 18:14:17
In reply to Re: Letting my animal die on his own timetable » crushedout, posted by Dinah on June 11, 2007, at 18:11:33
Thank you, Dinah. It is SO hard to decide. What you say makes sense--he has some quality of life still and I am saying my goodbyes. It hurts so much. And I've only had this cat for slightly more than a year (I got him when he was 18)--that makes no difference. I love him desperately.
Posted by muffled on June 11, 2007, at 18:28:32
In reply to Re: Letting my animal die on his own timetable » crushedout, posted by Dinah on June 11, 2007, at 18:11:33
((Crushed)) its just hard, no way round it. I am sorry. its so hard to let go. I agonized with my dog too. I think people said good things to you.
Its just a hard hard thing.
Your cat is lucky to have had such love, and your lucky to have been able to have had your cats love.
Its been good.
M
Posted by crushedout on June 11, 2007, at 18:33:00
In reply to Re: Letting my animal die on his own timetable, posted by muffled on June 11, 2007, at 18:28:32
that's true. thanks, muff.
Posted by Dory on June 11, 2007, at 21:56:49
In reply to Re: Letting my animal die on his own timetable » muffled, posted by crushedout on June 11, 2007, at 18:33:00
make sure you tell him it's ok to go when he needs to. that might sound stupid but i waited too long for my old girl, i wanted her to let me know when she was ready but i believe with all my heart that she knew i didn't want her to go and so she hung on. Animals know us on a deep level. Just let him know he's allowed to go when he needs to.
much peace and love
Posted by Racer on June 11, 2007, at 22:03:25
In reply to Re: Letting my animal die on his own timetable » Racer, posted by crushedout on June 11, 2007, at 17:49:23
I don't know, honey -- it's a hard decision no matter what, and no one else can do more than offer thoughts on it. It's what you decide that's going to count.
For me, I thought about how my beloved would be feeling -- confused, hungry, weak, frustrated by his inability to do things, etc. That was what decided me. I couldn't stand that his last hours/days might be spent that way. I thought about how I'd want to go, myself, and what I'd want in his position. I will admit that my fear that I was keeping him with me despite his suffering was the deciding factor for me. I couldn't bear the thought that I was being selfish with him, holding on to him beyond his time. That was the final answer for me.
Of course, it also helped that I knew I could trust my vet. I'd taken him in before, thinking I wouldn't be bringing him home, and she just laughed at me, "I'll bet you think this is serious, huh?" So, I knew that if it wasn't time, she'd know and tell me. And that she'd tell me if it was time. I also knew she liked him, and would do what's best for him. That sort of vet is priceless.
I don't know what to tell you. I can empathize with your pain, and I wish there was a fix for it. The only fix, though, is knowing that you will always have the love you've shared with him. It's small comfort, but it's real. I promise you that. I didn't think it would be, but it is.
Peace to you both.
Posted by DAisym on June 11, 2007, at 23:09:21
In reply to Re: Letting my animal die on his own timetable » Racer, posted by crushedout on June 11, 2007, at 17:49:23
I'm sorry crushed. I went through a horrible week last week with my beloved kitty and thankfully he looks like he is going to be OK. But he is only 9 -- your's is a lot older. I totally understand wanting to keep him around as long as possible.
Please eat something. Your kitty doesn't want you sick too.
Hugs for you and your cat,
Daisy
Posted by crushedout on June 11, 2007, at 23:45:14
In reply to Re: Letting my animal die on his own timetable » crushedout, posted by DAisym on June 11, 2007, at 23:09:21
Thanks, Daisy. I'm so glad your cat is ok.I think I may call the vet in the a.m. and make an appt. for a house call, to have him put down. Right now as I write this I'm all cried out and I'm totally stoic. But it's going to be pure h*ll. I don't know how I'm going to face it.
I went out and got food but I could barely eat it. He did want me to eat. He came to watch me. But it made me cry too much to eat.
:( :( :( :(
Posted by crushedout on June 12, 2007, at 8:43:23
In reply to Re: Letting my animal die on his own timetable » DAisym, posted by crushedout on June 11, 2007, at 23:45:14
I've got an appointment in four hours. At this point that feels like an eternity, because once I decided last night that I was going to do it, every minute has felt like needless suffering for my poor guy.I am devastated. I don't know how to deal.
Posted by gardenergirl on June 12, 2007, at 9:26:55
In reply to putting him down today, posted by crushedout on June 12, 2007, at 8:43:23
I'm so sorry, sweets. What a terribly difficult decision to have to make. I can tell it was made with great love and great thought. Still, it's such a loss, and I'm sure you're grieving.
I'll be thinking of you today.
gg
Posted by crushedout on June 12, 2007, at 9:50:07
In reply to ((((((((((((crushed)))))))))))) » crushedout, posted by gardenergirl on June 12, 2007, at 9:26:55
Posted by frida on June 12, 2007, at 10:44:18
In reply to Re: Letting my animal die on his own timetable » DAisym, posted by crushedout on June 11, 2007, at 23:45:14
((((((crushed))))))
this is a very painful decision.. :-(
thinking of you...
i had to decide to put my cat down last year, she was 13 and had cancer and was suffering greatly. I cried and cried and was really hard...the only thought that comforted me was knowing that she had had a wonderful life with me and she had been loved and we had been through so much together.
it is so hard though...
i am sending you my support,
take gentle careFrida
Posted by crushedout on June 12, 2007, at 10:51:32
In reply to Re: Letting my animal die on his own timetable, posted by frida on June 12, 2007, at 10:44:18
everyone's kind words and thoughts help
Posted by zenhussy on June 12, 2007, at 12:13:52
In reply to thank you frida, posted by crushedout on June 12, 2007, at 10:51:32
Posted by LadyBug on June 12, 2007, at 13:23:06
In reply to ((((((((((((crushed)))))))))))) » crushedout, posted by gardenergirl on June 12, 2007, at 9:26:55
(((((((Crushedout))))))) I wish you well. I'm thinking of you. Let us know how it goes. It's hard and so sad to say goodbye, but it's an act of love!!!!! Remember that.
LadyBug
Posted by crushedout on June 12, 2007, at 14:05:05
In reply to Re: ((((((((((((crushed)))))))))))) » gardenergirl, posted by LadyBug on June 12, 2007, at 13:23:06
He's gone now--I feel much better now that he's no longer suffering. It's still really sad, but now all the worry, anxiety, and dread are gone.Thank you all for your caring support. It's so much easier not having to go through this alone.
Posted by jammerlich on June 12, 2007, at 14:22:32
In reply to He's gone--I feel relieved, posted by crushedout on June 12, 2007, at 14:05:05
(((((crushed)))))
I know it doesn't lessen the grief at all, but I'm so glad you know, within yourself, that you did the right thing. I'm so sorry for the hurt; we all understand how real it is. I will be thinking of you today and in the days that follow.
Posted by LadyBug on June 12, 2007, at 15:30:54
In reply to Re: ((((((((((((crushed)))))))))))) » gardenergirl, posted by LadyBug on June 12, 2007, at 13:23:06
Posted by canadagirl on June 12, 2007, at 17:13:45
In reply to He's gone--I feel relieved, posted by crushedout on June 12, 2007, at 14:05:05
I know I'm late to this thread and I feel for you, my animal recently died and I let him go naturally, I cried buckets of tears but it was fairly quick. It was a relief too, I can relate.
I am so sorry.
Posted by Dinah on June 12, 2007, at 18:08:28
In reply to He's gone--I feel relieved, posted by crushedout on June 12, 2007, at 14:05:05
I understand.
You know, you gave an elderly cat a loving home for a very good year of his life. That's a very good thing. It was a blessing for both of you to have had that time together.
Posted by OzLand on June 12, 2007, at 19:44:53
In reply to He's gone--I feel relieved, posted by crushedout on June 12, 2007, at 14:05:05
I am so sorry about your kitty, and I know what you mean to be relieved that kitty is no longer suffering. I have a cat with diabetes and takes insulin shots twice per day plus her litter mate has renal failure. I dread the day he is no longer looking normal. Both are still young and on special diets now, but I know from past experience that they don't have that many years left. Pets are like family; actually they are family, and it is good to greive the loss.
Posted by annierose on June 12, 2007, at 21:39:55
In reply to He's gone--I feel relieved, posted by crushedout on June 12, 2007, at 14:05:05
Thinking of you ... grief is such a hard emotion to endure. Try to focus on your kitty's better days and happier moments.
I always loved it when I was able to dream about my doggie ... except I eventually would wake up!
You were a good mommy.
Posted by Dory on June 13, 2007, at 9:28:43
In reply to He's gone--I feel relieved, posted by crushedout on June 12, 2007, at 14:05:05
i only just saw this. i am so sorry. It never helps really, but you did your best for him. You probably gave him the best year of his life.
Remember what i told you? He was walking to meet death but ahead of him was a path of broken glass and blades, it was going to be so painful for him. And as much sadness as it brought you, you loved him enough to pick him up and carry him over that to the end. It spared him all that pain. Your sadness and pain will ease and you will be able to focus on the happy memories at some point. Keep those close to your heart to comfort you.
blessings for comfort and peace, thank you for the blessing of adding caring back into the world
Posted by crushedout on June 13, 2007, at 11:03:39
In reply to Re: He's gone--I feel relieved » crushedout, posted by Dory on June 13, 2007, at 9:28:43
Posted by confuzyq on June 15, 2007, at 0:07:52
In reply to Letting my animal die on his own timetable, posted by crushedout on June 11, 2007, at 11:41:40
...the timing of this thread is just incredible... On Monday I am driving my best friend and her 17 y.o. cat, which was diagnosed with a sinus cancer last fall, to her vet where this will likely be the outcome. She originally rescued this cat as a stray kitten all those years ago, in Hawaii where she was stationed for work at the time. They've been through so much together.
It can be so hard to tell if an animal is suffering yet; and there are definite clues that hers is; and with this type of cancer she was told last fall that kitty would likely only make it another month regardless. That obviously hasn't been the case, so my friend is and will continue to undergo the agony of whether she should go ahead and put kitty to rest Monday, after the vet has had an updated look.
At this point we both agree that Monday should be the day, for both their sakes. But so much easier said than done. It was very helpful to see and read this thread, thank you crushedout.
Posted by crushedout on June 15, 2007, at 1:29:52
In reply to Re: Letting my animal die on his own timetable, posted by confuzyq on June 15, 2007, at 0:07:52
I'm glad it helped you. It was incredibly helpful to me!It is such a hard decision, such a hard thing to do--I really don't want to have to make one like that again for a long time.
This is the end of the thread.
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