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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 10 of 10. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by bil on December 3, 2006, at 21:02:18
I am totally confused... I only posted here a few times, and then started having quite a bad time with my therapist. In the meantime I forgot my signing on name and password, and so have re-registered- I keep going to admin to let them know, but can't get that to work, either. One of those weeks, (sigh).
I had to give it up, though. It just got too awful. I was struggling SO HARD to be able to afford it- and just couldn't. I sat there crying so hard at my next-to-last session- explaining to her I didn't even have enough for bus fare to get to sessions- she said "leave it with me until next week" ...next week comes, I waffle for 50 minutes thinking 'what's going on???' too worried to ask- then she gets out receipt book and starts filling it out. I explained AGAIN that I honestly would have to stop therapy because of finances... she smiled sweetly and said "We can discuss that next week" !!!!!
I went home in shock. Sat down a few days later and wrote to her agency saying I CANNOT come anymore because I can't even afford my rent... I get a letter a few days later, (signed by the secretary) saying that she thinks I should come in so we can discuss why my financial problems "SEEM" to be preventing me coming in. Like she doesn't believe me.
That just did it. I sat there crying telling her how bad things were, and she thinks I'm making up all up. So I wrote another letter- and I'm not going back. Ever. I have had ENOUGH of it.
ohhhh.... but I feel so bad. I had such hopes for therapy- hoping it would help. Just feel so... lost. Again.bil
Posted by inimitable on December 3, 2006, at 21:12:20
In reply to Given up on therapy, posted by bil on December 3, 2006, at 21:02:18
i wonder how long have you been going to this therapist? i know i almost had to quit therapy too because of financial reasons, but i told me T that i would have to quit therapy because of that and he told me to talk to the secretary, and it old him that she didn't seem to be too concerned (she seemed kind of mean when i mentioned the price was a bit high before), so he talked ot her for me!!! btu i admit, i may be in a better situation because i go to the sliding scale Grad students in psychology at a local university, so i am lucky in that aspect i suppose. but i know my T said that i shouldn't have to quit therapy because of financial reasons. if your current T doesn't see what financial strain you are under (which in turn creates more stress and even MORE need for therapy, IMO) then is there any practice/office in your area that has a sliding scale? you could check that out. i know not all areas have those though. the place where i was going to ahve to move, i was checking into therapists in that area, and i didn't find any with a sliding scale, but i hope that you do find someone who can take you on that basis.
good luck!!!!*inimitable
Posted by muffled on December 3, 2006, at 22:13:04
In reply to Given up on therapy, posted by bil on December 3, 2006, at 21:02:18
Well, why DID they want you to come in and discuss?
Mebbe they DO still want you to come?
How long have you been going to that agency?
Do you feel connected to this T?
Definately it all seems rather murky doesn't it? They should be more clear with you.
Maybe you could bring in your bank statements/tax forms to show them that in fact you DO NOT have money. At that point, they will either say 'see ya', and your no worse off than you are now....or, they may choose to give you a limited number of sessions to at least assure that your stabilized b4 they give you the old heave ho. mebbe they do sliding scale? I think many do not like to advertise the fact they do, cuz they have to have SOME paying clients to pay the bills.
Maybe you need to clarify a few things before you run.
It might not be easy, but it would rest your mind that you did deal with it as best you could. You got the answers that you needed.
Hope it goes OK for you.
Nice to meet you,
Take care,
Muffled
Posted by ace on December 3, 2006, at 23:46:32
In reply to Given up on therapy, posted by bil on December 3, 2006, at 21:02:18
good decision
'Therapy' is a joke in my opinion.
It's also unethical for people to talk to biological problems, and ask for money!
Posted by tryingtobewise on December 4, 2006, at 2:47:19
In reply to Given up on therapy, posted by bil on December 3, 2006, at 21:02:18
Is it possible she was going to write it off - or adjust your free downward? Check that out and if neither of those two things are the case, stick to your guns.
Sometimes T's think money is an obstacle clients bring up when therapy is getting tough, or they are on the verge of a breakthrough in order to procrastinate. Sometimes T's egos get in the way and they are offended that their sessions don't rate as a top priority on the bill list. As depressing as it is, sometimes they are protecting their own income stream.
I hope none of the things in the paragraph directly above are the case but having worked at a mental health agency for several years, and now for a group of private practice counselors, plus going to my own therapy for quite a while, I have pretty much seen it all in terms of T's attitudes about payment issues.
In their general defense I will say that the most common response to financial problems T's make is to waive or reduce rates because they want to continue to help a client they've come to care about.
Good luck.
Posted by gardenergirl on December 4, 2006, at 7:29:14
In reply to Re: Given up on therapy » bil, posted by ace on December 3, 2006, at 23:46:32
> 'Therapy' is a joke in my opinion.I realize you were stating your opinion, and I respect your feelings about this subject. However, I still need to ask you to be sensitive to others' feelings, please, particularly those who engage in therapy as at least one aspect of their approach to wellness.
If you or others have questions about this or about posting policies in general, or are interested in alternative ways of expressing yourself, please first see the FAQ:
http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/faq.html#civil
http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/faq.html#enforceFollow-ups regarding these issues should be redirected to Psycho-Babble Administration. They, as well as replies to the above posts, should of course themselves be civil.
Thanks,
deputy gg
Posted by LlurpsieBlossom on December 4, 2006, at 22:06:33
In reply to Re: Given up on therapy » bil, posted by ace on December 3, 2006, at 23:46:32
> good decision
>
> 'Therapy' is a joke in my opinion.
>
> It's also unethical for people to talk to biological problems, and ask for money!
>
>Oh? so my dental hygienist talking to me about my teeth is unethical?
You know the power of words to change the body, don't you?
How did your body react the last time someone told you truly truly awful news? truly truly wonderful amazing news?
You know that talk therapy produces changes in brain activation, right?
Personally, I prefer it when my doctors talk to me and tell me what's wrong and how I can fix it, and maybe I can tell them something about why it's hard for me to do this or that...
But, I suppose some people may prefer the doctor to just do her tinkering and leave all verbal communication out of it. To each his own.
Posted by happykat on December 5, 2006, at 16:12:56
In reply to Given up on therapy, posted by bil on December 3, 2006, at 21:02:18
Bil,
I would write out on paper that you no longer have the funds available for therapy but are happy to continue therapy with the understanding that they are waiving their fee. Date it, sign it and give it to them. This will force them to either let you continue with a waived fee, negotiate a reduced fee or release you from care. It sounds like they are probably amicable to working out reduced or waived fee. You just want to make sure they are not running up a tab.
Good Luck!happykat :)
Posted by bil on December 6, 2006, at 12:30:32
In reply to Re: Given up on therapy » bil, posted by happykat on December 5, 2006, at 16:12:56
Thanks to everyone for your replies and thoughts...
I had been with this T for about seven months- and from what I could make out the agency wouldn't let her reduce the cost of the sessions any more.
I just wish that she had been up-front and honest about that from the beginning.I feel like a weight has dropped off my shoulders at the thoughts of not having to go there any more- I don't really feel like I connected with her at all. For her to imply that I was avoiding coming in because of what 'seemed' to be my financial problems... after telling her how hard things were!! I felt like she hadn't listened to a word I said- and yes, it was like she thought I was trying to get out of therapy because it was getting difficult.
It was never difficult. Just very, very boring.
I've been reading up about shamanism- and I know someone who is one. Perhaps I should give that route a go...couldn't be any bigger a waste of money, Lol!!!Bil
Posted by ClearSkies on December 6, 2006, at 21:30:55
In reply to Re: Given up on therapy, posted by bil on December 6, 2006, at 12:30:32
> I feel like a weight has dropped off my shoulders at the thoughts of not having to go there any more- I don't really feel like I connected with her at all. For her to imply that I was avoiding coming in because of what 'seemed' to be my financial problems... after telling her how hard things were!! I felt like she hadn't listened to a word I said- and yes, it was like she thought I was trying to get out of therapy because it was getting difficult.
>I went through quite a number of therapists before I found the one who "clicked" with me. She talked about it in our initial session, because, as she says, if the fit isn't right, then therapy just will not work. Also, her fee is rather low, and she isn't on any insurance plans; she said she does this on purpose so her clients aren't discouraged by the price in continuing sessions. In these ways she can choose the clients with whom she can do her best work, and keep 'em coming.
I do think it is worth it, if you think you could benefit from therapy, to search until you find the right T for you. There is absolutely no shame in deciding that one or another is not going to be the one you think you can work with. In a sense, that first session is about your assessment of the T as much as they assess you. Just my 2 cents.
> I've been reading up about shamanism- and I know someone who is one. Perhaps I should give that route a go...couldn't be any bigger a waste of money, Lol!!!
>My first T, who was great but retired her practise, regularly consulted a shaman as part of therapy for herself. I thought it was downright strange and kind of bewildering, but I have come to appreciate the wisdom of shamanic practises too.
> Bil
Nice to meet you.
ClearSkies
This is the end of the thread.
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