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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 10 of 10. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by the lonely one on December 29, 2003, at 19:44:46
Hi
I found this sight by accident but so far it has helped me speak from the heart.I have over the last couple of years suffered more pain than in the rest of my life. It probably started when my now ex decided to leave to move to another city. At first I was upset but we agreed that I would move once I had finished some business I had to deal with. After moving she told me she was pregnant. I had not felt so happy and we made plans. Over the coming weeks she told me that she was getting offers from jobs in other cities which she wanted to take. The job offers would mean that she would have to work long hours initially but would then come down. The time to start the job would have been when she was 6 months pregnant. I tried to convince her that another opportunity would come after the birth. After some arguments she agreed that she would not take up the job. To my shock, one week before xmas she told me that she would be taking up the offer. I said what about our unborn child. In one breath she told me that she was going to have an abortion and was ending our relationship. After that i do not think i have ever felt happiness. Every xmas after that is like a rerun of that time and the pain which never goes away returns with a vengence.
Thanks for listening.
Posted by Mimi on December 30, 2003, at 17:09:03
In reply to Xmas like no other, posted by the lonely one on December 29, 2003, at 19:44:46
Wow!!! That sucks bigtime. And I thought men were the jerks.
Mimi
Posted by the lonely one on December 30, 2003, at 17:57:15
In reply to Re: Xmas like no other » the lonely one, posted by Mimi on December 30, 2003, at 17:09:03
Hi
I have always treated others the way I would like to be treated. When we first started dating she said she did not want to be hurt like she had in her last relationship. I promised in that first date I would not. Little did I know that she would be the one who dealt the hurt out.
the lonely one
Posted by Mimi on December 30, 2003, at 18:21:47
In reply to Re: Xmas like no other, posted by the lonely one on December 30, 2003, at 17:57:15
>Hi,
I got disengaged two months ago and my fiance was the one who dished the hurt out after representing himself as my best friend.
Was I shocked to learn that when you lose your fiance you lose all in-law relationships!
How cruel. I spent X-mas all alone grieving.
Mimi
Hi
>
> I have always treated others the way I would like to be treated. When we first started dating she said she did not want to be hurt like she had in her last relationship. I promised in that first date I would not. Little did I know that she would be the one who dealt the hurt out.
>
> the lonely one
Posted by the lonely one on December 30, 2003, at 18:31:01
In reply to Re: Xmas like no other » the lonely one, posted by Mimi on December 30, 2003, at 18:21:47
Hi
The splitting up and loss of being a father was and is something I find hard to forget. It does not help when alot of my friends talk about her and ask me how she is ( she did not tell anyone what she done). I feel like telling them but i just think what good would it do now. The pain goes away at times but there is always something or someone who reminds you of your ex.
the lomely one
Posted by Mimi on December 30, 2003, at 19:16:43
In reply to Re: Xmas like no other, posted by the lonely one on December 30, 2003, at 18:31:01
>Hello again,
You must be quite angry, too. I've found that the hardest aspect to deal with.
Mimi
Hi
>
> The splitting up and loss of being a father was and is something I find hard to forget. It does not help when alot of my friends talk about her and ask me how she is ( she did not tell anyone what she done). I feel like telling them but i just think what good would it do now. The pain goes away at times but there is always something or someone who reminds you of your ex.
>
> the lomely one
Posted by the lonely one on January 1, 2004, at 13:38:54
In reply to Re: Xmas like no other » the lonely one, posted by Mimi on December 30, 2003, at 19:16:43
Hi
Yes i do feel angry. I think it is because she was so selfish at the time when i was ready to drop everything and be with her. I even told her that i would stay at home for the first year and let her be in a full time job. I got a phone call from her last xmas eve. She told me that she was engaged to someone and that she felt i should know before i heard it from someone else. I wonder why she did that for. Was i not in any pain already.
The lonely one
Posted by Mimi on January 1, 2004, at 14:42:19
In reply to Re: Xmas like no other, posted by the lonely one on January 1, 2004, at 13:38:54
Wow! What an X-mas present.
Has it been just one year since this break-up?
People are telling me it will take 2 years to recover from my disengagement.Mimi
Mimi
Posted by the lonely one on January 1, 2004, at 15:20:06
In reply to Re: Xmas like no other » the lonely one, posted by Mimi on January 1, 2004, at 14:42:19
Hi
It has been about 18 months. After the xmas when she had an abortion, she asked me to see her where she had moved. We had been on talking terms and i still wanted to remain friends. During the visit we talked and agreed to restart our relationship. It lasted about six months, when we drifted apart. I decided that the relationship was doing more harm to me and decided to end it. I hope it takes about two years to get over it for me.
The lonely one
Posted by ann72 on January 9, 2004, at 15:14:54
In reply to Re: Xmas like no other, posted by the lonely one on January 1, 2004, at 15:20:06
Hello, I am sorry to hear of your pain. I had a hard month in dec too. Last year on new years day, I left my husband of 14 years. (we were not good for each other mentally) but in this past year, I met someone great and have been very happy. Then in dec. I started getting very depressed-(still going on actually) and I guess it may be the painful memories of it all. I dont think I ever really greived for my marriage ending because I was so angry at the time and I up and left the state right after (a week into the new year) to start life over. I guess you cant run away from your problems. But I think one day you will find your true love and have that baby that you want. Have faith....
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