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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 60 to 84 of 86. Go back in thread:
Posted by Justherself54 on July 19, 2008, at 22:47:04
In reply to Re: Is Babble Dying? yup, posted by Sigismund on July 19, 2008, at 21:36:27
If it's not dying, it's certainly in trouble. I'm concerned about the amount of thread hijacking which turns into personal bickering. Not good for newcomers. I pretty much stay on the med board but don't participate very much anymore. I don't know what the answer is. Maybe there isn't one at this point.
Posted by Bobby on July 20, 2008, at 0:22:47
In reply to Is Babble Dying?, posted by llurpsienoodle on July 17, 2008, at 7:34:58
I can't speak for anyone else--but there a few things that have precipitated my absence. I guess that first--I should start with a positive. I am trying to break out of the box and live more-away from the screen---just because I'm able at the moment. Feel like I've lost so much time over the last 10 years. Maybe it's trying too hard to make up all at once----but I don't think that qualifies as a reason not to strive for it.
Another major factor is that it's really frustrating to invest yourself in developing relationships(I'd like to call them friendships) only to have a poster just up and change their posting names and then-under their new name/names-want to be all "buddy buddy" --as if nothing happened. they know all about you--but now you have no idea who they are --or used to be. That's one reason I have a tendancy to shy away from some "Newcomers." I suppose there's some fancy scientific name or diagnosis that explains it perfectly--but that doesn't change the bottom line.
Then--there is the polarizing of the community--you're on my side or theirs. Perhaps it's a new trend of sorts---seems the same in USA politics---the Country appears to be splitting apart over various issues in black or white. The gray areas have melted faster than any Glacier under global warming. Man! It's either the Moral Majority or the ACLU.
I'll not pollute this forum with too much venom--I'll try to get off of my Pulpit--but I must end with one last thing that I don't have the capacity to relate to like maybe I should---however--a lot of people here are so hypersensitive! "oh my God! you said the word "the" or "it"--"How dare you!" --"Can't you see that triggers me or upsets my little world!? Henceforth---they will go on a crusade to strike out any essence of free speach. "I'm telling mommy!" I'm sure that there are valid points somewhere in the maze that is babble----but I'm probably too callous to recognize them at this point--and to some of you ----I'm sorry--I don't hate anyone--but crap! If you know something will bother you --just say no! Don't read the dang post! It doesn't take a rocket scientist to figure that one out. Babble appears to have become just another newsstation with orders from upstairs to "only report the good news." I remember when Babble was more open, spontaneous, friendly, accepting and a poster had much more freedom to speak their mind---as long as they were civil---and I mean as in nonviolent. Just check the Archives-of say--Sar. Now civil has become a synonym for "politically correct." We have been torn asunder by special interest groups.
BUT--where there is life--there is hope---and maybe a good discussion--with open dialog--can heal enough wounds to breath some life back into the community. As mentioned beforehand---that's just me and I swear no allegiance to any one party. Thank's to Lurpsie for starting this thread--I think communication is good. thanks to anyone who's finished this hogwash and Best wishes to all. the end
Posted by TexasChic on July 20, 2008, at 1:25:50
In reply to Re: Is Babble Dying? Just me, posted by Bobby on July 20, 2008, at 0:22:47
I've been here since 2002 and there's always talk like this. I HAVE seen a big turnover since I started posting, but maybe that's normal. Maybe people grow out of babble. Maybe there were a select few who gave babble a certain feel and now they are gone. And like someone else said, now there are many more sites like this than at the beginning, so it stands to reason things will thin out. I think its a lot of small factors that contribute to this feeling, but I don't think babble is dying. I think its just evolving.
As for the feeling of not belonging and clicks, I remember that being said many times in the past too. I also remember feeling that way when I first started posting, but that changed for me eventually. Maybe its just the normal dynamics of a chat room like this.
As for people being ridiculed, that's deplorable. It only takes a few bad apples (or sometimes even one) to make a whole lot of people feel bad. I don't like seeing people being picked on or ridiculed, and if that's going on it needs to be addressed by the deputies and/or Bob. So maybe Bob's less prominent presence does have something to do with that.
-T
Posted by llurpsienoodle on July 20, 2008, at 7:28:21
In reply to Re: Is Babble Dying? Just me, posted by Bobby on July 20, 2008, at 0:22:47
>Thank's to Lurpsie for starting this thread--I think communication is good. thanks to anyone who's finished this hogwash and Best wishes to all. the end
Thank YOU Bobby. I have been very worried that I started a firestorm over here on admin. I was concerned that I started something that will only add fuel to the fire. Maybe that's so, but I hope it won't escalate past the point of being useful dialog.
I can't remember the last time I started a thread over here. Sadly, I lack the analytical skills and perceptiveness to dissect the real issues behind the loss of so many wonderful posters--- real people, real characters.
-Ll
Posted by llurpsienoodle on July 20, 2008, at 7:35:48
In reply to Things are shifting, posted by banana on July 20, 2008, at 5:46:42
Lacking the wherewithal to comment on Dr. Bob's psychology... I only submit the following reasons why some posters cease posting.
1) boredom. Once the med or therapy questions have been answered, there seems to be little reason to "hang out". When I get bored here, I try to be a little proactive and spice things up. Of course most of my efforts are failures, but at least I tried.
2) feeling better. One of the most prominent human tendencies is to run far and fast away from pain. Once the meds kick in, the job settles down, the relationships smooth out, the therapy is progressing appropriately-- why stick around? It might only remind one of the pain of adjustment, of transition. The reason why many folks seek out babble is because they are in pain, suffering for some biopsychosocial (political?) reason. Once that issue is resolved-- then what? Oh to be a Pollyanna and to proclaim- the death of babble is due to the success of modern psychiatry/psychotherapy... Wouldn't that be a panacea?
-Ll
Posted by Quintal on July 20, 2008, at 10:57:25
In reply to Re: Is Babble Dying? Just me, posted by TexasChic on July 20, 2008, at 1:25:50
>As for people being ridiculed, that's deplorable. It only takes a few bad apples (or sometimes even one) to make a whole lot of people feel bad. I don't like seeing people being picked on or ridiculed, and if that's going on it needs to be addressed by the deputies and/or Bob. So maybe Bob's less prominent presence does have something to do with that.
One of the problems I've seen is that people don't stop bullying because of the civility guidelines. They either go away or learn a more subtle form of bullying that doesn't *technically* violate the civility guidelines. This has come to be known as 'flying under the radar' or 'stealth' posting, and a lot of people have got it down to an art. I find this particulalry troubling when new posters respond to a taunt with an honest, emotional outburst and get blocked. There are posts on record where an individual (who no longer posts) has admitted to doing this as a kind of sport. This might be one reason why newcomers tend not to hang around/ survive for long these days. Like fresh meat round vultures, they get picked off.
Q
Posted by fayeroe on July 20, 2008, at 11:46:13
In reply to Re: Is Babble Dying? Just me » TexasChic, posted by Quintal on July 20, 2008, at 10:57:25
Quintal, I've noticed this since I came here back around 2002/03.
At times it feels like I'm watching some animal marking their territory...pawing, urinating, howling and in general saying "I'm someone to be reckoned with".
Why?
Sometimes I get the gut feeling that there is more here than meets the eye and upon reading a post again, I'll see see how the wording gets them "under the radar"..Such a waste of time for the person who sets out to antagonize.
Do you think the quote below applies Babble?
Power does not corrupt. Fear corrupts... perhaps the fear of a loss of power.
John Steinbeck
Posted by Lemonaide on July 20, 2008, at 12:59:26
In reply to Is Babble Dying?, posted by llurpsienoodle on July 17, 2008, at 7:34:58
lol
Posted by Dinah on July 20, 2008, at 13:05:57
In reply to Re: Is Babble Dying?, posted by llurpsienoodle on July 18, 2008, at 15:37:39
> Is babble dying due to deputy involvement or due to bob's disengagement?
>
> -LlOn nontearful consideration, I'd have to say that the one is the result of the other, not two separate possibilities. With Dr. Bob's current level of engagement, I don't see how he could continue to keep Babble open without a deputy system. Therefore the deputy system alone cannot possibly be the cause of Babble languishing. And this possibility could be restated and combined as Dr. Bob's disengagement pushing deputies forward into duties he once held is a factor in Babble's lack of activity.
Now, whether the current deputies are more corrupt, vicious, etc. than others might be is a separate consideration, I suppose. I happen to think we work very hard to apply the rules as we understand them, along with our understanding of Dr. Bob's wishes and our knowledge that he can and does override us. And to apply them fairly and equitably. And the fact that there are three of us, and that our actions can be overturned by Dr. Bob is an additional safety factor should any of us be given to enjoying power. Since I've worked hard all my life to avoid both power and its attendant responsibilities I would hesitate to consider myself someone who enjoys power. But I suppose that people who think otherwise would suppose that I could not be objective about that. I hope that Dr. Bob, who is aware of our struggles to apply the rules fairly, would not be in the latter group.
Posted by Dinah on July 20, 2008, at 13:09:01
In reply to Re: Is Babble Dying? yup » AbbieNormal, posted by Dena on July 19, 2008, at 13:43:34
I would not wish to be called a moderator. My role is not that of a moderator. The reality is that I act in Dr. Bob's name, to do what Dr. Bob would do if I were here, as best I can determine it. To me, that says "deputy" in its truest sense of the word.
I wouldn't mind assistant. But anything more than that would be misleading as to the actual truth of the situation.
Posted by Dinah on July 20, 2008, at 13:51:37
In reply to Re: Is Babble Dying? yup, posted by Dinah on July 20, 2008, at 13:09:01
> The reality is that I act in Dr. Bob's name, to do what Dr. Bob would do if I were here, as best I can determine it....
Whoops. Freudian slip. It is true that I, like many people I suspect, wish that Dr. Bob would run Babble the way I would have him run it. Rather than leave the deputies to run it the way he would have us run it. Now *that* would be the best of all worlds.
Posted by johnj on July 20, 2008, at 14:41:59
In reply to Re: Is Babble Dying? Just me » TexasChic, posted by Quintal on July 20, 2008, at 10:57:25
Wow, you hit the nail on the head. When I was banned for the week it happened because I had posters responding for another poster. To be honest it pissed me off. They were challenging what I said, when it was an honest attempt to help. When in essence they were doing what they were accusing me of. Too bad the person that I was talking with never clarified for all involved they just seemed to sit back and watch it all go down.
That was when I decided I just had to ignore one poster forever and even stated on the adm. board to Dr. bob about the ability to just turn off posters. That post was met with sarcasm which I viewed as a taunt so I responded harshly which just set me up. The deputies did nothing. So yes, people skate along the lines, which they have admitted, so they can "get away with it". The deputies should do something when the intent to taunt is there. The funny thing is I have NEVER responded to a legitimate question with taunting and if people do it for sport that is sad as that means they have nothing better to do.
So when people ask if babble is dying the answer is if you think it is it probably is. The good thing about all of this I have stayed away more and more and have vowed to limit my posting. That reminds me I need to go do something constructive for my mental health. I will be picking mulberrys today. Peace
johnj
Posted by fayeroe on July 20, 2008, at 16:27:43
In reply to Re: Is Babble Dying? yup, posted by Dinah on July 20, 2008, at 13:09:01
Dinah, John G. has the final say on everything at PC.
I've seen John step in before a mod sees a post and either warn posters or let them know that he is locking the thread.
Generally, locking a thread comes after John and the available moderators confer behind the scenes, the same way it happens here.You have to do something that is very, very bad before you are asked to stay away.You may be "banned" or suspended for one week. Two people come to mind..a doctor of psychology who was "guest" moderating the psychology forum and a poster who had the entire site in an uproar.
John is more hands on there than Bob is here. That doesn't mean that there aren't squabbles and dustups....
The "moderator" part comes from different people being "in charge" of a specific forum.I have no idea how many mods are at PC now. Maybe 10.
p.s. I really haven't seen a post here today that refers to the deputies as being vicious but posters who know how to stay under the radar are receiving alot of heat. That issue is definitely frustrating posters.
Posted by Dinah on July 20, 2008, at 18:02:44
In reply to Re: Is Babble Dying? yup » Dinah, posted by fayeroe on July 20, 2008, at 16:27:43
I didn't mean to suggest that anyone had said that deputies were vicious. I was just seeing where the two possibilities could be separated and where they were entwined. My statement that they were inseparable would of course be incorrect, if it was the particular deputies that were being objected to.
It was, in part, an exercise in logic.
We really aren't moderators of any particular board, though. We're not in charge of anything. We just are Dr. Bob's hands.
Dr. Bob's chosen dictionary didn't load for me for some reason, but Encarta defines deputy as follows.
1. somebody's representative: somebody fully authorized or appointed to act on behalf of somebody else
It's gotten associated with law enforcement because of the prevalence of sheriff's deputies. But I think that the above pretty much defines our role. It's a very limited role, even now. Thank heavens.
"Moderators" might be appropriate for the PC role. I think deputy is the most appropriate name here.
I don't know that it matters in the grand scheme of things. But it matters to me to delineate where my power and responsibility ends.
As far as flying under radar...
I've long wished Dr. Bob would invent the "Please Cease and Desist". A more general warning for specific behavior that may not be conducive to civic harmony, but that is too rare or too elusive to put down in a rule. I'd actually like that better than the plethora of rules. If deputies weren't considered trustworthy to hand them out, it could be reserved for Dr. Bob alone. The general rule could be that requests by Administration should be followed.
Dr. Bob prefers more specific rules, and I understand his reasoning.
I wish Dr. Bob were around more, though.
In the end, isn't it better to have deputies constrained by the rules than deputies not constrained by the rules? Maybe it's even better to have a site owner who feels constrained by his own rules?
Posted by obsidian on July 20, 2008, at 18:15:56
In reply to Re: Is Babble Dying? Just me » Quintal, posted by johnj on July 20, 2008, at 14:41:59
it's impossible to have a relationship with someone and not really piss them off sometimes right?
and I don't mean that we have to be "mean", because there is a difference between being mean and being truthful
although the response on the other end can be the same
honestly, the energy I have to expend to figure out what people are "really" saying is too much
I just wish people could be more direct, I can't deal with veiled anything at the moment
anger can be there, veiled enough to be civil or notI just want to know where people are coming from, I can't deal with anything else right now
Posted by fayeroe on July 20, 2008, at 18:22:17
In reply to Re: Is Babble Dying? Just me » johnj, posted by obsidian on July 20, 2008, at 18:15:56
Great post!
Posted by ron1953 on July 22, 2008, at 14:46:23
In reply to Is Babble Dying?, posted by llurpsienoodle on July 17, 2008, at 7:34:58
Actually, I think Babble is already dead, just not buried yet. I stopped posting here a long time ago because the insistence on political correctness and "safety", PBCs, blocks and general interference by Bob and the deputies created a rather repressive and sometimes hostile environment. It simply wasn't fun any more. And as the PC dead horse continued to get flogged, the site lost its allure and ultimately its purpose. I realize the PC-insistent folks feel that they've been doing the right thing but they're simply wrong.
Posted by ron1953 on July 22, 2008, at 16:36:40
In reply to Re: Is Babble Dying?, posted by ron1953 on July 22, 2008, at 14:46:23
Regarding "safety". The most "neurotic" dogs I've seen are those who are kept "safe" from everything by their owners; limited exposure to other dogs, humans, new environments, noise, etc.. These fearful animals are also the ones most likely to bite. Socialization is the prescription for dogs and for people, too. This place don't do that.
Posted by karen_kay on July 23, 2008, at 13:17:06
In reply to Re: Is Babble Dying? Just me, posted by Bobby on July 20, 2008, at 0:22:47
i don't think babble's dying. as long as mister bob pokes his sexie face in long enough for me to flirt with, i'm stickin around :)
i know i've been called (written? huh?) flighty and i am. i tend to post more when i'm feeling better, regardless of the current rules or leiniancy (oh man, that's really not spelled right! can you tell i've started my meds again?)
anwhoooo0, hey everybody! kinda my thoughts on the matter, from how i see it. it may be completely different in a few days, remember, i'm flighty!
miss y'all bunches! i'm feeling better, so i'll be around more often!
kk
Posted by toph on July 24, 2008, at 20:21:10
In reply to Is Babble Dying?, posted by llurpsienoodle on July 17, 2008, at 7:34:58
The thread is too long for me to read so if I'm saying something someone has covered already I'm sorry.
Bob didn't bring me here. Bob didn't cause me to stay. Bob didn't cause me to leave. And Bob didn't bring me back.
That being said, Bob has a pretty significant influence on this place both in it's design and in what he represents to most of us. To the extent that he is some form of parental image and he provides some kind of psychic glue keeping this all together, it makes me worry about what will happen to my family when my parents die. They seem an irreplacable force holding all the generations together. When they pass I think that many of my siblings will be asking a similar question. Is our family dying?
Posted by gardenergirl on July 24, 2008, at 21:08:55
In reply to Re: Is Babble Dying?, posted by toph on July 24, 2008, at 20:21:10
> To the extent that he is some form of parental image and he provides some kind of psychic glue keeping this all together, it makes me worry about what will happen to my family when my parents die. They seem an irreplacable force holding all the generations together. When they pass I think that many of my siblings will be asking a similar question. Is our family dying?
That's an excellent analogy. Wow, it really hits home with me. As the generation above my mother dwindles, it makes my mother, aunts, and uncles seem so much more vulnerable. Heck, we've even lost one from that generation now. And though I grew up with, for the most part, at least the older generation of my cousins, we are much more scattered and splintered. We rely on our parents to get the whole family together. What will happen when our parents can't or aren't here to arrange that? We talk about making sure we continue to get together, but so far it's only talk.
To tie this to Babble, perhaps as different "branches" and generations of the Babble family become more, diffuse?, we find it harder to come together?
gg
Posted by antigua3 on August 2, 2008, at 11:53:38
In reply to Re: Is Babble Dying?, posted by wishingstar on July 17, 2008, at 18:11:19
I've always thoroughly enjoyed your posts. I think you've always added a great deal to any thread. I always read what you write and encourage you to participate more!
antigua
Posted by antigua3 on August 2, 2008, at 11:55:16
In reply to Re: Is Babble Dying? » wishingstar, posted by obsidian on July 17, 2008, at 20:55:13
I'm sending you the same message as wishngstar. Please post; I always look forward to your opinion and while I may not respond, I'm always reading!
antigua
Posted by antigua3 on August 2, 2008, at 12:05:42
In reply to Re: Is Babble Dying? » obsidian, posted by rskontos on July 18, 2008, at 21:35:48
You have a great voice--IMO, it comes across very well, and I think you add great value.
antigua
Posted by Zeba on August 5, 2008, at 21:57:38
In reply to Re: Is Babble Dying? » rskontos, posted by antigua3 on August 2, 2008, at 12:05:42
Well, what does anyone think? If Dr. Bob is only going to be around one day every month or two,then perhaps the site should be shut down. That is one thought I have, and I guess I say this and ask for feedback because many people seem to feel hurt that he is not around much. Am I reading this wrong, or is this true? Thanks
Zeba
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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
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