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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 25 of 35. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by Dinah on January 4, 2007, at 19:51:55
I was talking to my therapist yesterday about the lump I found under my arm, and how I was sure it wasn't anything serious. But today the doctor found something in my breast as well and sent me out for a mammogram and ultrasound as soon as possible, which is Tuesday.
I'm still sure it's nothing, probably a couple of infected lymph nodes or something. But it's disconcerting when your doctor doesn't take it as lightly as you do. I think it would be helpful for me to do what if planning. A decision tree of sorts. But I suspect my therapist will say not to worry about it until it actually is found to be something. I don't think he understands that it's sometimes useful and reassuring to worry and plan.
Posted by TherapyGirl on January 4, 2007, at 20:00:09
In reply to I'm sure it's nothing, posted by Dinah on January 4, 2007, at 19:51:55
I'm with you on this one. I *never* feel more in control than when I have a plan and I *never* feel more at the mercy of the universe than when I don't.
I, too, am sure it's nothing, but I think you should plan, plan, plan. It's a heckuva lot better than worrying.
Posted by sunnydays on January 4, 2007, at 20:34:32
In reply to I'm sure it's nothing, posted by Dinah on January 4, 2007, at 19:51:55
It's probably nothing, but sometimes planning can give you a way to occupy your mind from less productive anxiety and worrying. ((((Dinah)))) I hope everything turns out ok. It probably will. My mom just had a biopsy of a mole they thought might be something bad, and it turned out normal. But in the meantime, try to keep occupied. Maybe your therapist will surprise you - try explaining why you want to and see what he says!
sunnydays
Posted by MidnightBlue on January 4, 2007, at 22:18:10
In reply to I'm sure it's nothing, posted by Dinah on January 4, 2007, at 19:51:55
Dinah,
Do the mammogram and the ultrasound and a special compression mammogram if needed. Be sure you go to the BEST place in town. And compare the films to earlier films you have had, if any. If you feel uncomfortable with the answers, get a second opinion.
If you feel like you need a biopsy and don't think there is anyone good left in New Orleans, go to MD Anderson in Houston. They will do a second opinion and/or biopsy. You don't have to have cancer to go there for a breast cancer screening.
Now that I've scared you to death, I just want you to know I have had several lumps and bumps. Never even had to have a biopsy. And no, I've never been to MD Anderson.
MidnightBlue
Posted by annierose on January 4, 2007, at 22:42:33
In reply to I'm sure it's nothing, posted by Dinah on January 4, 2007, at 19:51:55
I'll be holding you in my thoughts until you do find out. It's so disconcerning those tests, the waiting, and then the results. I hope you are right. That's it's nothing, but you are doing the right thing to make sure. I am thinking of you.
(((((((((dinah))))))))
Posted by canadagirl on January 4, 2007, at 22:55:49
In reply to I'm sure it's nothing, posted by Dinah on January 4, 2007, at 19:51:55
I'd feel the same way, wanting to plan and be in control as much as I could and also wanting as much information as possible. It's a good idea sometimes to bring someone to these type of appts for support, it can help even to know they are in the waiting room waiting for you to be done with the test. Even if you're not too concerned, it can still help ,if those concerns creep in later.
I wish you well for the tests and take care of yourself in the meantime. I'll keep you in my prayers.
Posted by ClearSkies on January 4, 2007, at 23:13:36
In reply to I'm sure it's nothing, posted by Dinah on January 4, 2007, at 19:51:55
I have some lymphatic, "nothing to be worried about" lumps about me. I'm having my mammogram on Monday; want to compare notes? I fainted the last time I had a mammogram. Oh, and then woke up and screamed at the staff. A stellar performance.
Make the appointment as soon as possible, and get it behind you as quickly as possible. That's my sage advice.
CS
Posted by muffled on January 4, 2007, at 23:46:08
In reply to Re: I'm sure it's nothing » Dinah, posted by ClearSkies on January 4, 2007, at 23:13:36
Posted by Honore on January 5, 2007, at 0:54:41
In reply to Re: I'm sure it's nothing » Dinah, posted by ClearSkies on January 4, 2007, at 23:13:36
So sorry, Dinah. {{{{{{Dinah}}}}}}
It's tough to wait so long for a test. Can't they fit you in tomorrow (ie Friday)? No one should have to wait that long when there's anything to check. Seriously. I take comfort from that, though, that your doctor doesn't think it's that worrisome.
It's going to be nothing, but nonetheless, until you know, it's disconcerting. If making plans helps-- make some. But not too many.
Honore
Posted by madeline on January 5, 2007, at 1:39:39
In reply to I'm sure it's nothing, posted by Dinah on January 4, 2007, at 19:51:55
I am sure that it is nothing too, but you are right to rule it out - especially if there is a history of breast cancer in your family.
I will be thinking of you until this storm passes.
Maddie
Posted by Daisym on January 5, 2007, at 2:24:38
In reply to I'm sure it's nothing, posted by Dinah on January 4, 2007, at 19:51:55
I'd be planning too. I hope it is nothing and I'll keep you in my prayers. You've had more than your fair share the past few years. Doesn't seem fair that you have to worry about this.
Remember, distraction works to make the time pass And sleep too.
My fingers are crossed.
love and hugs,
Daisy
Posted by LadyBug on January 5, 2007, at 3:13:03
In reply to I'm sure it's nothing, posted by Dinah on January 4, 2007, at 19:51:55
I hope it's nothing. I'd worry, but also try to remain positive. Lumps and bumps seem so common. I'm glad you are going to get it checked out. May you be comforted through it all. I'll keep you in my prayers that all will turn out well for you.
My best to you. Let us know as soon as you find out. I know your T will help you through this too.
Hugs,
Lu
Posted by happykat on January 5, 2007, at 9:37:55
In reply to I'm sure it's nothing, posted by Dinah on January 4, 2007, at 19:51:55
((((((Dinah))))))
I'm sure it will turn out to be nothing. But thats a long time to have to wait to find out. I'm always for anything that makes you feel more empowered or in control, so maybe a little planning isn't a bad thing.
Maybe take a break from the painting and go see some movies or get out and do something over the weekend. Keep your mind occupied.
Sending peaceful, loving, positive thoughts and prayers to you.
happykat
Posted by Dinah on January 5, 2007, at 9:41:23
In reply to Re: I'm sure it's nothing » Dinah, posted by ClearSkies on January 4, 2007, at 23:13:36
I'll be thinking of you Monday. Mine is Tuesday morning. I'm generally pretty good at taking them. In fact I have an all clear one from July. So I'm sure this is nothing.
Let me know how it goes, and I'll do the same. I'm sure yours are ok too.
Posted by pegasus on January 5, 2007, at 9:47:59
In reply to I'm sure it's nothing, posted by Dinah on January 4, 2007, at 19:51:55
I'm glad you're not too worried. I totally agree with you about the planning thing. Plus you seem to be pretty aware of what types of things are helpful for you in general. I hope it will turn out to be nothing. I agree that Tuesday is a long time to wait to have something like that checked out.
I had cancer once, and it started as a lump that I figured was nothing much. When it had been around a while, I went to the nurse at my student health center, and she wanted me to see the doc. The doc wanted me to see a specialist. The specialist wanted lots of tests. The tests led to more tests. And eventually surger and radiation therapy. And now it's 13 years later, and not a sign of it. So, my point is that even when things don't go as you hope, they can end really well.
Er . . . I guess my story might be more scary than reassuring. Sorry if it hits you that way. But really, I see the whole episode as a blessing at this point. Nothing helps straighten out your priorities like a cancer scare. I really hope yours is very short - like only until Tuesday.
peg
Posted by Dinah on January 5, 2007, at 9:50:24
In reply to Re: I'm sure it's nothing » ClearSkies, posted by Dinah on January 5, 2007, at 9:41:23
I was pretty disappointed Tuesday was the first time they had. But it was what my doctor apparently expected. She says they'll probably look at it and tell me what they see while I'm there. I *think* she'll be out of town, so it could be longer if they don't.
My husband is no end upset with my planning, so I hope my therapist handles it better.
Yesterday was just a bad day all around. Trouble at the office. I got my hair colored for the first time in over a year, and it came out strawberry blonde (or maybe just plain brassy) instead of blonde. When he asked how I liked the color and I pointed out it was a bit red, he said no, it wasn't red, and got annoyed and started yanking the comb through my hair.
And it's been raining nonstop and looks like it will rain. Which is a shame because if anything could wear me out enough to sleep, painting would be it.
I know it's probably nothing, but it's disconcerting to have your doctor not be as unconcerned as you are, you know?
And I had flouted the fates blatantly in my therapy session the day before.
Posted by Dinah on January 5, 2007, at 9:58:57
In reply to Re: I'm sure it's nothing, posted by pegasus on January 5, 2007, at 9:47:59
No, it's not more scary than reassuring. And thank you for sharing. I know that the treatments have come a long way, especially if it's caught early. So that even if it is something, which I doubt it is because the timing is just too perfect with the longstanding infection I had, part of my planning is planning around treatment.
I just need to distract myself really well until Tuesday.
Posted by All Done on January 5, 2007, at 10:32:12
In reply to Thanks everyone., posted by Dinah on January 5, 2007, at 9:50:24
((((Dinah)))),
I'm sending lots of good, healthy vibes your way. My mom's had a few lumps that had to be checked/watched. They turned out to be nothing. The waiting is crappy, though. I'm sorry they couldn't get you in sooner.
I think it's okay and probably natural (at least for some) to go through all the what-ifs. Maybe it's just not something your husband and T would do. I know my husband is very much a wait and see and do nothing until then guy. It kind of drives me crazy, but I guess I can see how my way might drive him a little crazy, too. Yin and yang. I like to think we even each other out.
Anyway...about your hair :). When I was blonde, I always had a problem when I went to a new colorist. Unless I told them to use ash blonde, I turned brassy. If I were you, I'd go to someone else and ask them to fix it. No sense in living with something you don't like and, if you ask me, no sense in going back to the oblivious/rude colorist.
You're in my thoughts and prayers, Dinah. Do a lot of nice things for yourself before Tuesday. My recommendations - play some games with your son, watch a few good movies, read a book, see your T (Sunday, right?), have a nice dinner with your husband, and hang out with your puppies. (Notice I said and not or.)
Love,
Laurie
Posted by Dinah on January 5, 2007, at 16:14:59
In reply to Re: Thanks everyone. » Dinah, posted by All Done on January 5, 2007, at 10:32:12
I was going to try to locate my old stylist to fix this mess on my head. I hate it. And I gave the guy a tip even after he got mad and started yanking at my head. What an idiot I am. :) My head's still sore even.
My therapist is way cool sometimes. I'm seeing him Tuesdays and Fridays for now, so I'll be seeing him after the test Tuesday. And he was great today. So comfortable imagining all the possibilities that even I was disconcerted. But he also made sure to say he'd be a mourner at my funeral if I died, and that if I got too sick to see him, he could do housecalls, and that he's perfectly comfortable working with people with cancer.
It all sounds rather morbid, but it wasn't. It was really kind of lighthearted and fun. We laughed a lot, while still talking about issues frankly.
He can be so great.
Posted by Deneb on January 5, 2007, at 16:50:41
In reply to I'm sure it's nothing, posted by Dinah on January 4, 2007, at 19:51:55
((((((((((((((Dinah)))))))))))))))
You're doing really well. Try not to worry because worrying does no good. Worrying doesn't change anything. It's really hard not to worry. I found it impossible. Remember that 80% of all lumps are benign. Also you are still quite young so the probability that it's something is low.
Try to keep your mind busy doing other things besides worrying. Playing with your son is a great idea suggested by someone here.
I remember how scary it was for me and everyone told me it was nothing and I just didn't believe them. I hope you can believe us.
Deneb*
Posted by sunnydays on January 5, 2007, at 21:28:22
In reply to Re: Thanks everyone. » All Done, posted by Dinah on January 5, 2007, at 16:14:59
Posted by mair on January 5, 2007, at 22:42:31
In reply to I'm sure it's nothing, posted by Dinah on January 4, 2007, at 19:51:55
Dinah - several years ago I had a routime mammogram, followed by an ultrasound. I had a benign growth in my breast when I was in college so I took none of this particularly seriously. However, before I could get out of the clinic, I was approached by a social worker and given a whole bunch of information about breast cancer. It was all so disconcerting. Fortunately, in my case the biopsy was negative, but the process of getting there from mammagram to ultra sound to biopsy to biopsy results took far too long for comfort. All my positive thoughts and a good ration of hugs are headed your way.
I know it's hard to resist planning, but as I've learned with my T, nothing happens all that quickly, and you probably don't know enough about what lies ahead, good or bad, to make your planning particularly useful. As was pretty typical for me, I did no planning because I was too busy and too paralyzed to really mobilize myself.
Mair
Posted by Dinah on January 6, 2007, at 10:25:19
In reply to Re: I'm sure it's nothing, posted by Deneb on January 5, 2007, at 16:50:41
I'm painting today, so I'll be sore and stiff and sleepy for a few days to come. It'll be good to keep my mind off things, and when you're trying to climb a ladder perched precariously in newly deposited loose dirt, it's hard to think of anything but broken legs. :)
Posted by Dinah on January 6, 2007, at 10:31:06
In reply to Re: I'm sure it's nothing » Dinah, posted by mair on January 5, 2007, at 22:42:31
I'm glad it was benign after all that anxiety Mair.
I'm one of those people who use worrying as a positive thing on occasion. It's only when I get stuck in a loop that it becomes a problem. I figure if I plan for the worst possible contingencies, then nothing looks really all that scary.
And I won't be as frozen with surprise as I was with the awful hair stylist, or for that matter with the gynecologist. I was so certain (and really am still so certain) that my lymph node is just swollen because I've had that longstanding infection that's now hiding out in my body somewhere (I still have been running a low grade fever fairly continuously), that she shocked me silly when she didn't pat me on the head and send me away. I left with the same fixed smile on my face that I entered with, muttering, I'm sure it's an infected lymph node.
I'm much better off if my brain is primed to different possibilities, however remote.
I was kind of surprised that my therapist understood that, but he never fails to surprise me from time to time, as well as I think I know him.
Posted by Dinah on January 8, 2007, at 8:35:21
In reply to Re: I'm sure it's nothing » mair, posted by Dinah on January 6, 2007, at 10:31:06
I can't even find the lump under my arm, so I guess that's a good sign that it was just a swollen lymph node. A day of painting Satuday seems to have gotten rid of it.
But I wanted to spend time with my family this weekend, I just wanted to be close to them, and they didn't really seem to reciprocate the desire. My son of course knows nothing, because we wouldn't burden him when there was nothing to know.
My therapist said I could call him today and he'd squeeze me in, but I don't really think that will help actually. The weather has improved so maybe I'll do some painting therapy to try to stop feeling sorry for myself.
I hate my job.
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