Psycho-Babble Psychology Thread 848958

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what's wrong with my unconscious?

Posted by raisinb on August 29, 2008, at 9:52:55

My therapy's been going very well in the past couple of months. Better than I'd ever expected it could. I can *feel* my therapist's caring--almost every session! (call the reporters!) We're both committed to working through our relationship. It makes me happy.

But I'm having horrible nightmares. Last night, after a great session, I dreamed she rejected me over and over again. I couldn't make her hear or care, no matter what I did. It was so vivid that I'll have a "hangover" from it all day.

I also have dreams that I see people I love shot and killed, that I'm being chased by monsters, etc....Is my unconscious *trying* to make me fearful and sad again?

 

Re: what's wrong with my unconscious?

Posted by Nadezda on August 29, 2008, at 12:15:12

In reply to what's wrong with my unconscious?, posted by raisinb on August 29, 2008, at 9:52:55

When I'm going through positive changes, as I have this year, I have many nights of terrible dreams and nightmares. Right on the cusp of the changes, just as I've begun doing things differently or feeling better, they come every night.. Then they fade away.

My T said it could be an attempt to express the fears aroused by the changes, or to keep alive some of the old patterns, at least in symbolic form. Just now, I"ve done new and important things that I hadn't been able to do, and, in the wake of that, I've had nightmares this week, too. But, as upsetting as it is in the moment, I don't think it's a bad sign, or something to worry about. And I've noticed the pattern all year..

For me, something warm to drink, or doing a little web surfing takes my mind away from the weird, panicky feelings--if there's no one around to wake up (I tend to wake my bf up if it's really bad).. Once or twice I've even come here in the middle of the night and written down the dreams-- that really helped, too.

So if you're like me, it's a hopeful sign--as strange as that may seem.--that you've begun to make deep changes that are really going to open up possibilities-- or already have--


Nadezda

 

Re: what's wrong with my unconscious? Nadezda

Posted by Phillipa on August 29, 2008, at 12:54:29

In reply to Re: what's wrong with my unconscious?, posted by Nadezda on August 29, 2008, at 12:15:12

I like your interrpretation mine has been of dying so I'm being reborn? Love Phillipa

 

Re: what's wrong with my unconscious?

Posted by susan47 on August 29, 2008, at 12:57:35

In reply to what's wrong with my unconscious?, posted by raisinb on August 29, 2008, at 9:52:55

> My therapy's been going very well in the past couple of months. Better than I'd ever expected it could. I can *feel* my therapist's caring--almost every session! (call the reporters!) We're both committed to working through our relationship. It makes me happy.
>
> But I'm having horrible nightmares. Last night, after a great session, I dreamed she rejected me over and over again. I couldn't make her hear or care, no matter what I did. It was so vivid that I'll have a "hangover" from it all day.
>
> I also have dreams that I see people I love shot and killed, that I'm being chased by monsters, etc....Is my unconscious *trying* to make me fearful and sad again?

I like the other interpretation as well. Mine is also like dying and being reborn. Maybe there's a part of you that hasn't come up yet and needs to be heard, a part she hasn't been able to hear or that you haven't been able to express yet?
What haven't you told her?

 

Re: what's wrong with my unconscious?

Posted by Sigismund on August 29, 2008, at 17:08:16

In reply to what's wrong with my unconscious?, posted by raisinb on August 29, 2008, at 9:52:55

You are just experiencing contingency, are you not?

Anything you possess you may lose.

What you value you may destroy.

That's why we don't like to stand too close to the edge.

 

Re: what's wrong with my unconscious?

Posted by Daisym on August 29, 2008, at 23:39:39

In reply to Re: what's wrong with my unconscious?, posted by Sigismund on August 29, 2008, at 17:08:16

I believe that you may be entering another, deeper phase of therapy. In attachment therapy, it is common to see this when the patient allows the attachment more completely - when you can truly feel your therapist's caring. The psyche then opens to many past feelings of abandonment and misatunements of the mother (usually it is the mother, it can be another care taker.) It is very, very painful to feel all of this, even with a strong anchor and ally. I'm not surprised it is showing up in your dreams as your mind tries to work it through. And a big part of this is the fear of loss - admitting you care about this person and they care about you may feel like tempting the fates. And it gives your therapist power to hurt you, which likely activates huge fears.

Isn't it just terrible that something so great like your therapist's caring also creates a crisis of sorts in your unconscious? I swear I was better off when I didn't know I had one.

 

Re: what's wrong with my unconscious? Daisym

Posted by raisinb on August 30, 2008, at 10:34:21

In reply to Re: what's wrong with my unconscious?, posted by Daisym on August 29, 2008, at 23:39:39

Yes, nothing can be unambivalent, I suppose. It's reassuring to think that my nightmares might signal a positive change. I was worrying that another, deeper part of me was trying to communicate that what I think is progress is all a big fantasy.

 

Re: what's wrong with my unconscious? Nadezda

Posted by raisinb on August 30, 2008, at 10:36:29

In reply to Re: what's wrong with my unconscious?, posted by Nadezda on August 29, 2008, at 12:15:12

That's a really interesting--and reassuring--interpretation. Sometimes I *do* think that my conscious and unconscious minds work together in order to keep things at a certain equilibrium. Sometimes my therapist says she thinks I'm afraid of being happy or accepting caring from others. Maybe on some level I'm trying to ward it off.

 

Re: what's wrong with my unconscious?

Posted by raisinb on August 30, 2008, at 10:37:13

In reply to Re: what's wrong with my unconscious?, posted by susan47 on August 29, 2008, at 12:57:35

That could be, too. There are many things I haven't told her, but the number's dwindling rapidly.


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